Innocence of Love (13 page)

“I could not expect that from you,” she voiced.

“I would like to, after all it would be my way of saying, welcome to your new home, a gift if you like,” he said.

He smiled at her while he could see her scanning the area, possibly looking for a reason not to have the house.

“That would be sweet, I will see what happens, but thank you. You’ve done far than enough already for Kacey and me,” she told him.

Calvin didn’t wish to argue with her, or tell her that it would be his honor to help her out, the thought of possibly sharing in the future. He shook his head needing to stop those thoughts and think about the reality of what was happening around him. He loved Sophie, what more was there to say? He wanted to share his life with her, be with her, share their boring days, go on holidays, visit museums, go out for wonderful romantic meals, visit the cinema, everything, he wants to experience it all with her, including cuddling up in bed and whispering sweet nothing or making love…and boy, would he make love to her.

He hoped tonight he would get that opportunity to tell her how he feels and that he wants to grow old with her and live a wonderful life.

He watched her re-enter the house. His heart sunk, never in his life had he felt so heart-stricken so much as he did now. How could he tell her how much he loved her and this house was far too small for a growing family?

A growing family!
He shook his head needing to shake those thoughts away for now, and when he declares his love to Sophie, he would listen to his heart singing and dancing.

He followed her into the house while her father talked to the owners. Sophie stood in the kitchen, just mulling around the room, no doubt trying to decide what she could do with the space, clearly she was making plans for the house. He quirked his face, unsure he would want her here, but then, it was ideal for her and Kacey for the time being. How on earth could he be making plans to move in with her when he lived in London?

****

They stepped out the house and moved down the drive enough space for two cars. She gazed at the neighbour’s house to see how well kept they were, after all she didn’t want scruffy people close. She saw one neighbour owned an expensive car. She smiled. She glanced around the rest of the area, well-kept gardens, pristine houses. She felt they would be safe here and hoped there might be a small community, neighbourhood watch, but not darn well nosy neighbours who needed gossip all the time. She guessed no matter where she lived there would be that odd nosy parker.

She rolled her tongue over her teeth, thinking about her prospects, longing to learn to drive only would that be another costly expense she might not be able to afford? Her dad had discussed getting her driving lessons. It would be nice to own a small little run-around especially with her father living in a no public transport village.

Everything appeared to be moving too fast for her. One minute she had nothing, no life, scared about where her next meal and bed would come from, and now she had a daughter, looking at houses and thinking about driving lessons. She stood at the front of the house, wondering what on earth to do, or how she had ended up here, with her dad and Calvin.

Sophie saw Calvin emerge out the house giving a half smile, but she could tell he was vigilant. Her father followed out with the owner of the house. She inhaled a deep breath releasing slowly. She reached into her bag to produce her phone to look at the time…7:30 p.m. panic took over needing to get back to the hospital and by her daughter’s side. Yes, she was entitled to breaks, and yes it was wonderful getting out the hospital for a short time, but it was time she headed back and hoped to have another cuddle of her tiny little bundle. She also needed time to consider her options on the house.

Calvin walked toward her. She tried to smile, but instead came over with anxiousness, desperately needing to get back to the hospital, soon her breasts would need expressing.

“You okay?” Calvin asked concerned.

“I need to get back to hospital, to be with Kacey,” she informed him.

“We will. I think your dad is just asking a few questions regarding the house and then we will be heading back. Do you like the house?” Calvin asked while she became impatient, shuffling from one foot to the other waiting for her father, anxiously staring at him. Her heart raced rubbing and scratching at her face, needing her dad to move and now.

“Yes, I like it,” she replied sharply.

Her father finally walked toward her. He flicked the remote for the car for them to jump in and make the trip back to the hospital.

“Did you like that house? I think it’s ideal for Kacey and yourself, close to shops, schools, and park and not too much trouble to pick you up to take you to my house if you wish to visit,” her father mentioned driving the car back to the hospital.

“Yes, I like it. I like it a lot, and I think it would be a great home for us.”

“I will sort you out driving lessons, and we can go shopping for furniture,” he told her.

“You don’t have to, Dad,” she abrupt when he turned his head to scowl at her.

“I have missed ten years of being with my daughter, I will spend what I wish on you and my granddaughter, there will be nothing to discuss,” he snarled.

Sophie dare not argue with him, aware when he meant something, he meant it and he would stick to it like guns. She guessed his personality had much to do with his job, being a barrister.

The drive wasn’t too long and she was back by her daughter’s side, her father had left telling her he’d get in contact with the seller of the house in the morning and put in an offer in. Sophie felt nervous about owning her first home, a place she could lay her head and rest without any major concerns. Rob made her nervous every night, not knowing who lurked around, or never knowing what they were high on. She had felt guilty for taking substances in the early months of her pregnancy, but she had no idea she’d been expecting, but now she would never touch the stuff again, her life with her precious daughter was more important.

She yawned totally shattered. Sophie wasn’t able to nurse her daughter due to her temperature dropping and needed to stay in the incubator. Sophie was gutted.

“Why don’t I get us something to eat and then we could watch a movie. I noticed a DVD player in your room,” Calvin winked when she stared at him. She screwed up her face, indecisive.

“Okay,” she decided with there not being much she could do.

Her daughter was sleeping and the night staff were coming on, she could really do with relaxing, having a decent meal and remove all her anxieties.

Calvin headed off for some food. The night nurse, popped her head in to say, “Hello, I’m Rachel and I’m going to be looking after Kacey all night.” Sophie smiled at her.

She could not fault the staff at all.

While Calvin popped out for the food, she expressed and took her equipment to the feeding room where she stored the bottles in the fridge. She showered wanting to hurry, being unsure when Calvin would return. The warm water cascaded over her body soothing her stresses and worries. Her mind drifted thinking about Calvin wishing he was in the shower with her. His hands caressing her soft skin, nurturing her contours while making love. She smiled. However, then it dawned on her, she glanced down seeing her saggy tummy, her boobs having many stretch marks like her tummy. She felt disgusting, at least now that the stitches had dissolved she didn’t have them to look at anymore.

Once dried she put on her towelling robe and wrapped a towel around her hair, putting it into a knot. She walked back to her room, with the instant aroma of Chinese take-away. She opened the door to her room, and inhaled the Chinese, making her tummy sound aloud. She found Calvin serving the meal up on two large plates, with knife, forks and napkins.

“Hope you’re hungry,” he scoffed. Sophie lifted her brows shocked to the amount of food he’d got.

“I am, but not sure I could manage all that,” she mocked.

“I got a movie too,
The Proposal, with Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock,
” he told her smiling.

“I love that movie,” she elated, excited and carefully without spilling the meal sat on the bed with Calvin to her left. The movie ready, they started watching while eating the food, filling her to the brim.

She yawned. Her eyes became heavy by the minute struggling to keep her eyes open.

“Come here,” Calvin voiced she could feel him shuffling up the bed. She gawped at him, while he held out his left arm as he sat-up on the bed, shoes kicked off, fully clothed disappointing her somewhat.

“Do you think we should get under the bedding?” she thought to ask, while she pulled the towel from her head allowing her part-dried hair with thick strands to flick down.

“We could do.”

“Well, you may as well stay here, unless you have somewhere else to go?” she mentioned longing for him to stay the night with her.

“No, I have nowhere to go. I’m quite happy to stay here with you,” he replied.

He stood whilst she watched him stripping off his clothes. She gasped at the sight. He removed his T-shirt showing off his naked back. Her jaw dropped when he reached for his jeans he undid the buttons and zip and before she had a chance to turn her attention away from him he dropped them allowing them to drop to the floor. She gasped. His bum so sexy, snug fitted trunks moulded embracive to his delightful sexy cheeks, perfect to grab, perfect to squeeze and certainly perfect for her to maul her hands all over and adore. Wow she would love to spank him. His white trunks clung to his cheeks. Sophie became lost in her deep thoughts, mesmerised, and craving to touch him.

Her nipples pressed taunt against her robe, and her womanhood throbbed, swelled, eager to have him lusting over her, making sure they created a unique bond, so powerful and breath taking she wouldn’t be able to ever erase the image from her mind.

Suddenly Calvin turned around to face her. She quickly reached for her comb to remove the knots. Not wishing him to think she’d spent a few seconds treasuring him. Her mouth went dry, unable to speak, unable to remover the image of his bum only now if she glanced at him she’d be confronted by his groin.

Holy crap,
she muttered under her breath and used her hair to hide her obvious stare. She couldn’t help but use her hair as a curtain she peeked through catching a glimpse of his frontal. She hitched her breath. Swallowed hard, lost in the heat of the moment.

Quickly she turned away, needing to restore some normality. The bed squeaked as he climbed back on as she was left puzzled…wondering what she should do. Surely, here wasn’t the right place to declare her love for him and throw her body at him, or was it?

Her breath hitched and she was keen to throw herself at Calvin, and show him how much she appreciated him. Her stomach was in severe knots having her heart skipping vital beats, if her body wasn’t in such a mess and enough to make him think he was staring at a live monster, she would be keener to chuck herself at him and ravish him senseless.

She licked her lips and decided to leave her robe on, not wishing to scare him away, despite the fact she wanted to. God, she wished her body didn’t look like a wrinkly monster.

Her hair combed she slowly made her journey up the bed. She swallowed hard, aware the man she loved was in her bed, wearing only trunks, God there had to be a Lord somewhere. She turned around and with great care climbed over Calvin and edged her way up trying not to look at his groin area, or his chest, but pretty impossible.

Once beside him, unsure what her next move should be.

Calvin wrapped his arm around her shoulder indicating she snuggled into him. Wow she would never refuse.

She laid down on his chest. His right arm wrapped around her shoulder, holding her securely, losing herself in his touch, the fact her cheek pressed against his naked chest made her flutter. All she could hear was the sound of his heart beating and could feel his breath on her face. She closed her eyes tightly longing to reach up and kiss him.

The movie played, but she was more interested in cherishing the man holding her, showing her warmth. She didn’t care if she overheated and become sweaty. She wrapped her arm around his tummy, loving the closeness and inhaling his wonderful spicy fragrance. She was lost. Captured by the man she loved, yet one thing missing…he had no idea how much she loved him. How and when could she tell him?

Sophie was so relaxed.

Her eyes became heavy, and with his comfort and hotness, she fell into a deep sleep.

Chapter Seven

Calvin could not believe he was in bed with Sophie, Sophie Richards, his one true love. He could feel her breathing on his chest and the flickering of her eyelids, while she snuggled into him, with the palm of her hand resting on his hip. When she suggested stripping off his clothes, he almost combusted, delighted his manhood wasn’t showing great signs of pleasure, instead he managed to contain, how he had no idea.

Sophie was the most precious person in his life, there was no-one else he could imagine being with than her. The fact he was almost naked, only wearing his trunks that moulded to his groin, so if he became aroused she would see it with no hiding. She wore a robe, gutted he wished she had lost that, he had no idea why she had it on, but then it was still far too early for any action, since her having Kacey, her little bundle of joy.

He’d been honoured to have held Kacey earlier, he just wished it was forever, sharing those amazing times with her growing up with Sophie, which they missed out on with Sabastian. He would confess, he was annoyed, but no-point in bringing up what had already been and gone. What he could do was make it up to Sophie in the future.

The house…he wished she would go for something bigger, however without opening his mouth too soon and upsetting the apple cart, he had to leave it be. After all, there wouldn’t be anything stopping them from selling the house in the future and moving to a more idyllic spot. A perfect location to enjoy a growing family, their family, a family he would make sure was safe and well.

Taking his fingers through her hair while holding her tight, inhaling the aroma of raspberry shampoo into his nostrils. She drove him totally insane with arousal. He thought for a brief moment of the women that had come and gone in his life, but the one that he craved he had embraced in his arms now. He wondered if she felt the same way about him, whether she thought about how wonderful it was to be so close holding one another, respecting, and having thoughts about the future, their possible future, or was he simply a good friend?

Too many questions loomed around his mind, far too many heartstrings being pulled and he couldn’t slow his heart down from wanting her.

With his left hand, he started twiddling his fingers through her long hair, playing with her long strands, her breathe on his chest cooling him down. She was hot, in fact, no cooking, but there hadn’t been any movement from her at all. She was settled no chance was he going to move and disturb her. He placed his fingertips on her exposed right shoulder and gently touched it, while he could feel his member hardening to the fact he poignantly touched her.

His rod stiffened there was nothing he could do to stop it. Hard, trapped inside his trunks, keeping his manhood locked out the way, only his erection pressed firmly against the fabric fighting to be exposed.
No, stop it
, he muttered under his breath when suddenly Sophie moved. He froze. She moved her hand on his tummy further down to his pelvis.
No…no Sophie, not lower please.
He pleaded, begged, not needing her to be distressed to find his manhood as hard as nails arguing with him to come out. There was no-way he could even relieve himself. It had been quite some time since his rod had been so rigid.

Bile filled his throat, when her hand crept lower. His manhood twitched. He tried to stop it, but the more he attempted to make it stop, the more it pulsed. He could feel the blood pumping vigorously down his length. He scratched his head. Panting, needing his erection to stop reacting, stop, yearning for her.

Her hand slipped further down.

No, Sophie, please no, bring your hand back up.
His chest tightened, holding his breath, aware soon he would start shaking and that would wake her. He couldn’t breathe. His manhood became the size of the tallest building. His member pushing harder onto the waistband and her hand inches away.

He tried to slow his breathing down, not wishing to make Sophie aware of the strain he was under. Her hand slipped down and touched. He froze. Her eyelids flickered. Calvin held his breath, betting she had woken and felt his combusting erection. His mouth had gone dry. Nothing in his body worked except for his member, the blood continued to pump hard and fast into the length.

Sophie grunted to suddenly move her hand away from the area, relieving him. She thankfully moved a little snuggling back into his chest her hand resting on his abs. He sighed with relief…or was that disappointment?

The fact remained Calvin was so besotted, so in love, yet there were others, especially their innocence of love, their children, his son and her daughter. Okay, Kacey wasn’t his, but he would do whatever means to make her his. He would love her like his own, provide for her, take the best care possible, she wouldn’t go without. He guessed that would be where the problems would lie, especially with Sabastian. He wanted so much to meet his son, see what unique gifts he got from his dad, whether they look alike, or whether he took more after Sophie. He wished he knew, he wished her damn bag had never got stolen and she could show him a picture. He knew that played with his heart more, knowing in the bag there was pictures of their child. He bet if they passed one another in the street, he wouldn’t recognize him, which broke his heart.

He wasn’t about to go over the past and what Sophie should have done, and how she should have come to him, too late, he needed to accept that.

Finally, Calvin felt his eyes becoming heavy. His right hand side of his body had gone numb, but did he care? No, he didn’t.

****

She woke up damp, her boobs leaking. She slowly lifted her head to see Calvin fast asleep, so beautiful, so calm, and so breath-taking. In fact, just gorgeous his head slanted to the left, still positioned the way she had fallen asleep on him. She could not believe how shattered she’d been last night and how once she rested her head on his chest she fell into a deep sleep. She lifted her body up more longing to engage and drink him while he slept. His lips were slightly parted, his chest rising and lowering, God, she loved him and couldn’t believe how sweet and sincere he was.

Aware somehow she had to climb of the bed and see to her boobs, she tried slowly to move down his body trying her hardest not to wake him, being located close to the wall, leaving her only two ways out. A, she climbed over him or B, she slid down the bed hoping not to wake the gorgeous creature. Waking him in the early hours of the morning would be cruel.

He grunted while she moved a little to his left, when she finally arrived to the bottom of the bed, having her robe lifted up. She stood bringing the robe back down not wishing to reveal anything of her body. The garment drowned her. She had got far too hot and waking her up a few times, when she remembered touching his erection. Her heart stopped beating unsure whether to sit up and give him the evils for such a reaction or kick his ass out the bed. Instead, not wishing to lose him, she remained to act fast asleep and moved her hand quickly away, not wishing to give him ideas. Annoyed, he had been sexual aroused, but then again…maybe she could have straddled across him and taken full advantage, would he have wanted that? But then, why was he stiff in the first place?

Questions, raged around her head, yet she would not act, not only would it embarrass her but Calvin too.

She picked up her breast pump trying not to make the slightest noise, tip-toeing to the door. She glanced back to the bed, Calvin hadn’t moved a muscle. She smiled joyous he’d stayed the night. Again quiet she unlocked the door and crept out. Once at the other side of the door she sighed gutted she had to leave his company, although Kacey came first.

She made the small journey to the feeding room lights down only the sound of the machines were heard, she could only just hear the nurses talking at the nurses station. She walked to the feeding room not bumping or being seen by anyone.

Sophie tried not to think about Calvin, but he seemed to have sneaked himself in and will not let go. She wondered whether he liked the house she’d chosen, although why did his opinion matter? He wouldn’t be living in it. She slumped her shoulder and lowered her jawline. Upset however, he lived in London. He lived far away from her, too many miles and having a relationship where she would only see him at weekends would break her heart. It wasn’t the fact she wouldn’t trust him, but she’d miss him terribly, talking on a phone or skyping one another, just wouldn’t do.

Sophie wished her head wasn’t so full of mush she knows exactly how she feels. Thinking over her situation, arguing with her sub-conscious if to wait until they are settled in their new home, enjoying her daughter then maybe if their relationship was in the same position she could tell him, tell him how much she loves him. What worried her was his travelling back and forth from London to York, no-one would wish to make that journey every weekend. Then she thought about weather conditions in the winter, delays and set-backs with his job she’d be spending hours pacing back and forth waiting for him to arrive. Did she need that burden, could she really be at home five nights without him? She closed her eyes while the pump expressed her boobs, annoyed with herself for considering the options.

She couldn’t see the point in mentioning anything to him. After all it would only cause unnecessary heartache, if he didn’t laugh at her. He might see nothing in them but friendship. Her mind drifted back to the erection he held.
Grrr stop thinking so much, you’re giving yourself brain ache.

Sophie came to a conclusion she wouldn’t mention anything, her lips would remain sealed.

Once she finished expressing, she placed the milk in the fridge. She sighed, knowing the life she had wasn’t what Calvin needed,
for God sake he’s a bachelor.
Sophie popped her head in on Kacey, to find the nurse doing her observations. They smiled. Sophie saw her tiny little bundle kicking her arms around, very much awake.

“Are you going to keep Mummy awake at night?” she cooed at her daughter.

Kacey looked at her, so alert making her heart skip beats.

“She is beautiful. She looks like her dad,” the nurse announced.

Sophie turned her head to stare at her.

“What do you mean?” she trembled with horror taking over her. Sophie felt her heart stop beating. Fear had taken over. She froze on the spot.
Crap had Rob, turned up?
Why would he turn up? He wouldn’t wish to have anything to do with her or Kacey, and how the hell had he found out she’d given birth? Panic raced around her head, shaking franticly and sweat poured of her brow.

“The man, who came in with the take-out meal,” she spoke.

Sophie exhaled in relief having allowing her entire body to relax. “He’s not her father.”

“Oh, sorry. I presumed he was, with her having dark eyes and beautiful brown eyes like him. I guess that means never suspect, until proven.” She giggled.

“Yes, something like that. Although, I would give anything for him to be her dad. He held her yesterday and looked amazing. I became very emotional,” she informed her.

“And who is he to you?” The nurse asked while checking her daughter’s observations.

“A good friend, a very good friend.”

She lowered her head feeling her pulse racing. She closed her eyes, swallowing hard. Tears filled her eyes, just thinking about how special he was to her and how she couldn’t imagine him in her life.

“You okay?”

“No.” Sophie lifted her head to stare at the young nurse. “Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you’re far too scared to be open and honest with someone?”

“Yeah, many years ago. Is there something you’re fighting?”

She gulped hard and frowned, unsure if to tell the nurse or not, but she had no-one else to talk too without them judging the situation.

“I love him, but scared to tell him. You see, he lives in London and his parents live up here. We grew up in the same area, but I hardly ever saw him only at stupid village events, or at parties, but even then we didn’t speak. You see my parents sent me to an all-girls school, so I was out the loop with the regular village kids,” she openly admitted. The nurse stood listening to her. Sophie sat down on the chair close to the incubator. “Anyway, when I was sixteen and he was eighteen, well actually the night of his eighteenth party we had a sexual encounter.” Tears filled her eyes knowing now she made the biggest mistakes of her life. She should have gone to Calvin. She should have told him her current situation.

“I ended up expecting and having his son, who I put up for adoption.” Sophie gazed at the nurse, while torrents of tears fled. She snorted hard. “Please, don’t judge me I was scared, frightened of what his reaction would be if I told him, he was eighteen and a typical young man, at least I think so. I hardly saw him. I knew of him, but never…oh, I should shut up,” she rambled knowing she was repeating herself and already she’d told the nurse far too much.

“You don’t have to. I’m not here to judge you and if talking about him helps, then please allow me to help you. He seems a really nice man, and clearly he thinks much of you, or he wouldn’t be here, especially if he’s travelling from London and back,” the nurse acknowledged.

“Do you think I should tell him?” she had to ask, looking into her eyes as she scratched the back of her neck, anxious, even though the only lights on were the ones on the incubators and the lights flashing from the machines.

“Yes, I think you should. You never know what is around the corner. Look for what it’s worth, if you don’t tell him and he thinks there is nothing there and he moves on with his life, and meets another…how would you feel then? You’d kick yourself.” She smiled.