Authors: Marien Dore
I smiled at them, but I really felt jealous. They could at least have each other and be open about it. Right now, I was unsure of a lot of things.
At that thought, Jeff stood and looked down to me. “I need to talk to her for a moment. Will you be okay for a minute while you eat?”
I nodded. “Yeah, completely fine.”
He stepped out into the hall with Rachel, closing the door. I heard them speak softly and their retreating footsteps. Turning back to my food, I grabbed the plastic fork she left me and slowly ate my mashed potatoes, forcing myself to go slow.
I thought that being alone would be a nice because it would give me a second to think some more. But after that bastard told me about Casey, that was all I could think about. His arm cut off? He didn’t deserve any of this. Would he be okay? Getting his arm removed probably meant he was going to live but he was really close before. He might die later. Hell, he might be dead.
At that thought, I felt a few tears spring up to my eyes. I quickly wiped them away, knowing I need to be grateful. I was very grateful, but it was also hard at that same time.
I tried thinking about other things, but Casey was all that came to my mind. I couldn’t even bring myself to worry about going home because Casey held all my worry. Sighing, I ate the rest of my potatoes before eating my Jell-O. Taking my last bite of Jell-O, I heard the door open again. I smiled to see Jeff walk back in and shut the door behind him. He sat beside me this time as I ate the last of it.
“Where’s Rachel?”
“She had to go back to work,” he said. “I was able to ask her for a favor.”
I looked at him, my eyebrows dipping. “What favor?” I finished off the little cup. Though I was hungry before, I felt so full now. I was not used to eating so much. I turned towards him as he answered.
“She went to check on him,” he said. I knew he meant Casey.
My eyes widened, and I swallowed hard. “She did?”
He nodded, leaning forward. “He’s getting pretty drugged up right now. The important thing is it’s going to help him. They need to do surgery immediately.” He waited for me to answer and when all I could was stare, he went on. “She also said they will give him a temporary prosthetic arm. His permanent one will be ready in a couple months when the amputation is fully healed. So he will be fine. Eventually, he will be able to do almost everything he could like it was his real arm.”
I sighed, nodded, relieved and so very thankful. God, we got so lucky. I smiled, shaking my head with a feeling close to disbelief. “That’s… that’s great. That is so wonderful.”
He nodded. “He will be done with the surgery and fine by about ten in the morning. He will be back in his bed at eleven, resting. When he wants, a temporary one can be put into place, but it will have to be a bit after surgery.” Looking at his watch, he extended his wrist and showed me it was close to two in the morning now. “It will seem like forever, but you can go in and see him at maybe noon. He will be probably sleeping and very out of it, though. Visitors aren’t allowed, but Rachel said she will let you after he rests for at least a few hours. Ironically, he is her patient.”
I couldn’t believe it. He would be okay. Though it will suck to wait, I’m willing if it means I can see him. “Wait, so he will be okay by then?”
“No, not even close, but he could be awake by then and at least able to talk to you. He may not make sense because he is on a lot of medications right now. He’s really sick, but he will get better.”
“That’s good. He will be better.” I nodded. I didn’t care how long it would take as long as he would be okay.
“Here,” Jeff said, handing me a folded up piece of paper that was in his pocket. “This is his room number and the floor he is on. By the way, Rachel doesn’t know. She just thinks you are really good friends.”
I took the paper from him, happy. Really happy that things would be okay. I mean, we will be harassed by reporters and will have a hard time being together because of that and his job. We would make it, though like he had said on the island.
“Thank you, so much!” I stood, going to him and hugging him where he sat before I could help myself. I felt him chuckle slightly and hug me back.
“You sure like thanking people,” he said.
I smiled when I broke away, taking a deep breath. Another question came to me a moment later. “Hey, where are we? I don’t recognize this hospital.”
“I imagine you don’t. This is Milldale Hospital. You’re in New York.”
New York... meaning we were a couple hours away from home since Casey and I lived in Ohio. “Wow, we are far from home.”
“Yeah but it’s okay. We were able to get his records along with yours. We tried calling your dad, but since it’s the middle of the night, I’m guessing, he didn’t answer because he was sleeping. But the hospital left a message so he could come anytime.”
I kept my smile up but my heart sank, and I felt my stomach twist. I still didn’t know what I was going to do with him and my brother. Hell, could I or would I even try to do anything yet? If dad dies, then I die. He has connections and will make sure I will go down with him. I didn’t know what to do. I just knew I had to talk to Casey before my dad comes and takes me home. If he wakes up only to find that I went home with dad… he will do something crazy. I needed to tell him that I would be okay until he is better.
Of course, I would have to wait several more hours until then. I just prayed that our strange luck wasn’t going to run out. Hoped that my dad wouldn’t be here until after I talked to Casey.
“You should sleep, though,” he said. “Though you are not checked in, we are offering you room to use. I imagine you are exhausted.”
I nodded, trying to get my mind off of worrying about my dad. “Yeah… that would be nice.”
He said goodbye and said I would see him later. Then, a different nurse showed me the way to my temporary room for a few hours. When I got there, I saw I would be alone which was nice. She assured me I would not be bothered by anyone including the reporters. I thanked her and watched her leave as I lay down on the soft and really comfortable bed. I pulled the blanket over me, trying my best to get some sleep. Though my thoughts kept me awake for a while, my exhausted body, mind, and heart couldn’t take much more, and I fell asleep.
“Janice?” I heard a woman whisper. “Wake up.”
Moaning softly, I felt my eyes open, and they met with Rachel’s pretty dark blue eyes, her soft smile aimed at me. Glancing around quickly, I saw nothing changed as I smiled back. “Hi,” I yawned.
“Hey, it’s about 11:50 right now. I didn’t want to wake you, but I knew you would want me to. If you want to go see him, we can go now. He slept for a while but is up at the moment, which is crazy. He’s surprisingly doing very well for how many drugs are in him. He’s a sweet guy. He told me a joke earlier and made me laugh. Then, he got really worried and started asking for you.”
I smiled to hear he told her a joke. He couldn’t be doing too badly then I figured. I slowly sat up, feeling terrible with the fact that I was so dirty and stinky, wearing the same clothes. A few hours ago, I didn’t care for the fact I was too worried and tired. Although I’m still worried and tired, I, at least, was calm enough to want to change that. It was a strange feeling to be dirty and have no shoes in a place like this.
“I want to clean up at least a little before I see him.” I really would rather see him first, but I felt nasty and weird in such a clean place.
“Sure,” she nodded as I stood. “You have this bathroom to yourself to shower or change your clothes.”
I pursed my lips. “Well, I don’t have any clothes other than what’s on me.”
“I have some old clothes in my car you can wear. They may be a little small, but they would do for now. I will be here the whole time too if you need me for anything.”
My eyes widened at that. She didn’t need to do any of this! I wasn’t even a patient. “I would really appreciate that,” I nodded, really stressing that.
About twenty minutes later, when I felt clean and somewhat refreshed, I brushed out my hair and put the clothes on she gave me. Though they were a little short, they were good enough. She was also nice enough to find me a pair of shoes. As I was about ready, I kept wondering what Casey will be like when I meet him in a minute. I hope he’s okay enough to talk to about my dad because I need him to understand that I will be okay when I leave.
Looking in the mirror of the small bathroom, I noticed my skin was much tanner but clearer. My hair was smoother than when we were on the island. I had quickly showered and quickly shaved as well. My face looked thinner as did my stomach, my eyes still red from all the crying I had done for what seemed to be days straight.
“Can I ask you something?” Rachel asked beside me, sitting out by the door.
“Sure.”
“How did he get that long cut on his back?” she asked. She was talking about the cut Casey got from when we both swam down to the plane.
“Did he talk about it?”
“No, but I noticed that it was stitched sloppily.”
I smiled. “He cut himself on a broken edge of the plane. We went down to get supplies since it wasn’t that far down. We were able to get a couple bags, but he got cut badly. And I stitched him up by the way.” I chuckled at the bad job I did.
Her eyebrows rose. “That’s really amazing what you two have been through.”
“Yeah but I would really appreciate it if you kept that to yourself. I don’t want much getting out after seeing how the public stretches the truth.”
She nodded. “I understand.”
Taking a deep breath after a second, I walked out to where she was waiting for me. I gave her my clothes that I had been wearing on the island, and she tossed them in a garbage bag.
“Ready?” she asked as we walked out of the room.
I nodded, grabbing the piece of paper Jeff gave me with the information I needed. Rachel couldn’t take me to him because her break was already done and she had to catch up on her work.
“Can you find the room? Just go around the corner. He is on the same floor.”
I nodded. “Okay, thank you for all you have done. You and your husband.”
“No problem,” she said with a soft smile. Then, she turned and walked the other way, going back to work and tossing my old clothes away.
I swallowed hard.
Calm, calm, calm
. Dad probably wasn’t even awake yet to get the message. It would be a while before he gets here. That will be enough time with Casey to tell him.
I began walking, hoping he was okay. He would be hooked up to all those machines, which was bad enough to expect. I hope he was okay and knows that I’m okay and here as well. She said he was worried, and I hated that.
Going around the corner, I found his room number that was written on the piece of paper in pen. Closing my eyes, taking a deep breath, I grasped the door handle and opened it. Walking in, quietly shutting the door behind me, I stepped more into the room. I paused when my eyes reached him, my stomach twisting.
He was pale but not as bad as before. Over him, he wore a hospital gown that they changed him into. There were bruises on his arm with where the needles were stuck into him, the tubes under his skin giving him the fluids he needed.
Yes, that’s right.
Arm. One arm.
My lips dropped apart at seeing the result of the surgery. My eyes went down the skin of his shoulder until I saw that his skin stopped just after his elbow. It was wrapped up there with a ton of material. Not only that, there a couple tubes going into his skin above where they cut it. There were a few machines next to the bed and where what was left of his arm was. It was a crazy sight, but he looked good. He looked fairly well compared to the last time I saw him.
He was hooked up to machines, tubes and needles all over him. But I knew that was keeping him alive, healthy now. He looked exhausted, his cheek pressed against the pillow of the bed. His face was tilted up and towards the window. As I began to walk over, closer to him, I saw his eyes gently open, blinking a few times before he looked over to me.
I was standing at the foot of his bed when he looked to me, his eyes growing. I heard his heart rate monitor change, the beeping sound speeding up at seeing me. He looked so worried, breathing in deeply. “Oh god,” he whispered. “You’re okay,” his voice broke.
“Yeah,” I whispered, wanting so badly to hug him to me, kiss him and hold him.
“You changed your hair, and you grew taller,” he said, smiling, eyeing the shirt that just reached over my belly button. My pants were short too. As for my hair, all I did was wash it.
I chuckled. “I took a shower.”
“Are you sure?” he asked, serious. His eyes dipped, looking me over again. “Water only makes plants grow, not humans. Everyone knows that.”
It kind of hurt seeing that the drugs were causing this but I couldn’t help my laugh. “Your nurse gave me some new clothes that were small on me,” I clarified.
He nodded, his eyes burning in mine. It was like he understood what happened and wanted to react as he would normally but the drugs seemed to fight him at the same time. Without realizing it, I stepped closer, moving to the side of his bed, stopping and looking him over. I forced myself to not go any farther.
“Come here,” he said, love filling his voice. He raised his arm that he didn’t just have surgery on and gestured for me to come to him. Passion filled his eyes, and I stepped forward, leaning over and wrapping my arms around his neck, hugging him to my lightly.
His arm going around me, I felt him grasp me, hugging me lightly. It couldn’t be much effort for the fact that I knew he was still really weak. I felt him stroke my hair back. “Lie down with me,” he whispered lightly, his tired voice weak. I moved back slightly, looking to him to see if he was okay. I was more than a little cautious.
“Casey, you’re still very sick and weak. You need your rest. Don’t try to push it. You are lucky you are even talking and awake.”
“I don’t care. Lie down with me. We didn’t get the chance last time,” he said.
I felt my head hurt, knowing what he meant. On the island, when I went to get him because the fire was coming, he wanted to lie with me. But we couldn’t because the fire was coming. Knowing that was only over twelve hours ago was crazy to think about.
“Are you sure?” I asked, eyeing all the tubes.
He nodded, eyelids falling closed, He winced a little, moving over a few inches to make room. My eyes went wide. They said he was really sick and would be here for a while. I didn’t doubt that, but they also said he might not make sense. Though it was obvious he was drugged up, he was still serious and understanding. He was weak and tired but not as much as they seemed to describe. It was incredible, the fact that he was so close to death last night and now was going to be okay.
Sighing, I moved closer, sliding carefully into the small bed with him. I lay on my side and just on the edge; I didn’t want him to move over anymore for me. Lying next to him, facing him as he lay on his back next to me, I smiled as he did too. Opening his eyes, he met them with mine.
He surprised me by wrapping his good arm around me, pulling me down against him slightly. I knew we shouldn’t be doing this with him being so weak and tired, but I couldn’t help it. Leaning onto him as he wanted, I rested my cheek on his pillow as he tilted his head a little, the cool brown color meeting mine closer. I lightly placed my arm over him, hugging him as we lay together. I felt a few tears come to my eyes at knowing he would live, at knowing that he was okay. For good this time.
After a minute of lying there, I eyed where his arm was removed. It was only half really, but it was a major difference. I figured it was okay, but I asked anyway. “Can I…?” I started, nodding towards where it was wrapped up.
“Yeah, it’s okay. You can feel it, but I’m not supposed to move it much.” I was scared it would hurt him, but he seemed fine with it. That’s why I sat up slightly and leaned towards his other side. Lightly, I ran my fingers over the stump wrapped in material. Then I ran my fingers up to where his upper arm was exposed. It was bruised thanks to the tubes but just feeling him, it was nice.
“What are you thinking?” he asked.
I smiled. “How thankful I am.”
“Just wait until I get my prosthetic arm. I could scare the shit out of kids on Halloween. That would be awesome.”
I laughed, looking up at him smiling. Moving back to lie on my side, he wrapped his arm around me, moving his hand to rest on my hip. I placed my hand over him before intertwining out fingers together. Then we rested back, sighing. Lying together silently, his eyes closed with the smile still on his face. After a moment, he opened his eyes and glanced at me. “You smell clean.”
“Yeah? How do I usually smell?”
“Terrible,” he whispered with a small smirk. I chuckled a little. “You look beautiful too,” he added.
“How do I usually look?”
“Just as beautiful. You’re just clean and beautiful now.”
I closed my eyes as well after he did again, lying there and resting while still awake. We were both exhausted in every way, and we both needed rest, him especially. We were quiet for a few minutes, just lying together. The only noises were the steady heart rate monitor along with our close and soft breath.
“Rachel told me you were asked questions and that I should know what you said.”
I sighed, not wanting to think about anything, about the drama that was quickly coming. “Yeah, we need to have the same story for the public.”
“Hmm?”
“We are famous. The plane crash was huge news before. It’s even bigger news finding two survivors.”
He groaned and spoke with sarcasm. “Wow, that’s great.”
“Yep. So this guy from the airline asked me questions. I had to change some things up because apparently everyone is suspicious that we are together.”
“Why?”
“Just because we were living on an island together. They assume we became too close or something.”
“So much for ‘welcome home.’”
“I know.”
I went on, explaining how I lied about how he couldn’t recall how he got on the island and how I just swam out. I went on explaining the other things as well. I hated the fact that I couldn’t just enjoy this time with him because I would be leaving soon. I felt sick with that knowledge.
After a few seconds of not saying anything, he spoke. “If I must, that will be what I will say. I’ll remember. But… I don’t know.”
“Don’t know what?” I asked.
He shook his head. “I hate this. I wish we were back on the island, wished we never came home because of that stupid rat. I don’t know what we are going to do.”
I cringed. “I know. We are going to have to keep our distance at times. Plus, there is Jill.” I felt him stiffen and sigh. “People will be watching, looking for signs that we are together. I don’t want to, but we probably can’t be together for a while.”
Seeing his painful gaze, I felt my brain start to suffocate. When would we be able to see each other? Not often. If my dad found out that I became close with Casey, he maybe would literally kill him and me. My dad could easily assume that I might have told Casey everything about the murder and him, which I did. We were goners if my dad ever saw that.