Authors: Marien Dore
I couldn’t hold it back anymore. Laughing at how serious he was acting, I moved down, hitting his lips against mine and kissing him, this time opening my mouth for him like he wanted. Groaning, he kissed me harder, his mouth and mine moving in sync. I felt his one hand that was on my neck, move up into my hair and hold my mouth to him as his other rested on my hip. My hands moved down, resting against his chest as I laid over him.
A moment later, I began kissing his neck and heard him let out a moan. His arms around me tightened. “Oh god Janice, I don’t want to stay away from you. I want to be with you.”
I kissed up his neck before softly breaking, resting my head against his shoulder, breathing a little harder. Tilting my head to the side, my cheek resting on his shoulder, I glanced up to his face, sighing.
“Just until I turn eighteen,” I moaned as I felt his hands on my back rub up and down, comforting me. “May 22nd and I will be eighteen, and once school is out, we can be together. Not even a year. We can do it. It’s worth it. We have been together for more than a month or so. Imagine the rest of our lives. It’s worth a few months of barely seeing each other,” I whispered.
He sighed, kissing the top of my head. “I know it is. We can’t take any major risks. Our phones are going to be our best friends. We will go through hell with reporters and interviews. I’ve already had to give a few answers. I was interviewed a few days ago.”
Oh great. Of course, when we need to hide something as big as the love we shared, reporters are hounding us. Just until school is out and we can be together. Even after that, we would still have to be careful and take it slow so we wouldn’t raise suspicion of us being together before that. But eventually, when people would know about us, they would probably assume we got together on the island and hid it this whole time. As long as there would be no evidence when that happens, we would be fine.
Knowing that Casey was interviewed and that I would be too again, it scared me. What if we screwed up, gave them answers that didn’t match up? We would have to be extremely careful and cautious with what we say and what we do.
“Did you remember what I said? Did you tell them the same things I said so our answers matched up?” I asked.
He nodded slightly. “Yeah. I remembered the things we needed to say instead of the truth. I’ll call and tell you if I say anything else to them that you will have to know and repeat. You do the same, okay?”
I nodded. Looking up into his eyes from where I was resting against his shoulder, I watched him carefully. He stared off through the window, not looking at anything specific. Saying nothing for a while, it was clear neither of us wanted me to leave the car since I wouldn’t see him for a time.
Then I felt him gently move his hands to the hem of my shirt. Slipping his hands under my shirt, his fingers spread wide and moved up, caressing my skin as he rubbed soothing circles. My hand that rested on the back of his neck slowly twirled and played with the tips of his hair as my other hand rested on his chest. He was so warm… holding me to him. He was home. I would miss holding each other and kissing his soft lips. Most of all, I would miss his eyes. Looking up into them now, I tried burning the image into my head.
Those eyes were sad and happy at the same time as he watched me, an inch away from my face. His thick eyebrows framed his perfect deep eyes, dipping with passion I knew he wanted to share. A hand slipped out from under my shirt where it was making designs on my back and found my face. His soft and warm fingers caressed the cheek that wasn’t pressed against his shoulder. He lightly brushed my hair back that was draped over my shoulder, moving it behind my ear.
“I’m going to miss your eyes,” I whispered. “Going to miss everything about you.”
He pursed his lips, sighing. Leaning down, he pressed his lips against the cheek he was caressed. Lifting his head back up, he slowly descended his head again, this time directly over my face. Pressing his loving lips against mine, he gave me a small and gentle kiss before moving his head back. His eyes never left me as he started playing with my hair and caressed my cheek again.
“I’m going to miss holding you, running my hand through your long hair. I’m going to miss your beauty and miss your loving kisses. I will miss your presence as a whole, but at least, I will have your voice. I can still hear your voice, talk to you whenever I need to.”
Such a sweet man. Being with this sweet man was worth the hell we would face the moment I leave his car. I wanted to stay here with him, just lay here in his car with him. My aunt wasn’t home and wouldn’t be for a while. However, I knew she would be calling soon and be expecting to hear me in her house.
But… I didn’t want to leave him yet. Laying there, the only sound was that of a few passing cars and nothing else. We just enjoyed the feeling of being together this last time for a while. His hand continued rubbing my back as his other played on my cheek and in my hair.
My hands on him tightened without even thinking about it at the thought of leaving this car. “I need to go,” I sighed.
“I know,” he said quietly with a sad and sorry note.
Though we just said that, neither of us moved. Still lying there for a moment more, I groaned, not having the will to move. Obviously, he didn’t either.
“This is going to be harder than I thought,” I said.
“Just remember our time together on the island. The best time of my life. Remember that when you miss me, call me all the time.”
I nodded and groaned, lifting my head up. I pushed myself up, sitting up. He reached down along the side of his seat, grabbing the lever and making the back of his seat rise back up again and him with it. Now sitting up again and me with him, his face was much closer now.
His sad eyes told me enough. He didn’t want me to go, but I needed to. He cupped my cheeks one more time, kissing me again before he broke away. Neither of us said anything after that. He sighed, glancing at the car door. Reaching over, he grabbed the handle, and opened the door, making the lights come on.
He helped me get out, moving my legs so they weren’t trapped. Taking my hand, he helped me step out of the car and off his lap. My feet on the cement of the driveway, I was standing now. I turned and looked at him as he shut his car door. As he started the car, I sighed and began walking up the driveway and towards my new house.
Stepping onto the porch that was brightly lit by his headlights, I walked to the door and grabbed the hidden key under the mat. Then, with my hand on the door handle, I heard something.
“Janice!” I heard Casey’s yell to me. Turning back in confusion, I saw that he rolled down the window and was looking at me instead of backing out.
I moved back down the porch, going to the driver’s side door where his window was down. Looking at him through the window, I approached it more. I bent down towards his window to see what he wanted. In the next second, his hand moved out the window, lightly grasping the front of my shirt. He slowly pulled my face closer and into the car under the protection of darkness.
He kissed me again, deeply and slowly. I moaned as I kissed him back from where I was standing, straining my neck. It made me smile on his lips, knowing he just wanted one last kiss from me.
When we finally broke, he rested his forehead against mine. “I love you. I can’t wait until school is over.”
I kissed him again in a short and sweet lock of our lips before I forced myself to slowly break and back away. I smiled sadly at him as he did back. “I love you, and I will be here when school is over.”
Taking a deep breath, I watched as he slowly started to back out of the driveway. As he reached the road, I turned and walked back up to the house, getting to the door, unlocking it, and opening it. I stepped instead and shut it behind me.
I knew we could do this. I was still recovering from what happened, and he was still dealing with it too. We would both be facing reporters and countless interviews now that we were out of the hospital walls. We had to stay away from each other since our relationship needed to be kept a secret. We needed to be careful, watch ourselves around people, and manage it all until school was over.
We could do it, and that was something I was positive of. We would and could do this. And… we did.
It’s been a while since I was seventeen. More precisely, nine years. I am now twenty-six years old. Being on the island still seemed like yesterday and not nine years ago.
Nine years since I was seventeen
… Wow. Time goes by when you’re having fun I guess.
However, our fun didn’t come until after I graduated.
We came a long way to get where we are today. Well, that was an understatement I suppose. We have come more than a long way. We made it through my senior year. That year was a hard year to get through too. Casey and I backed off of each other, staying away no matter how much it hurt. My aunt tried helping me through what happened with my brother, but only Casey was able to get me to listen. Of course, it was over a phone call.
A lot of the time, I would feel awful that he even needed to help me. I tried to convince him several times that he could do better than me despite what he told me. I sometimes felt like trash during that lonely and bitter time. Talking to him got me through it, though. While I went through those internal struggles, I helped Casey in return. He didn’t want to discuss it, but I wanted to talk him through everything. He couldn’t get it through his head that he killed two people despite the reason. Two lives he took, and it made him ponder for hours over it.
Talking constantly, I nearly teared up every time I heard his voice over the phone. I had missed him so much. Sure, we walked by each other in the school halls, but that was a tease. It didn’t do justice to what we had on the island. We couldn’t be seen together without receiving a raised eyebrow or accusing stare. So we stuck to what seemed like such a strict plan: cellphones only. There were very few times that we met in the barn.
The reason for having to stay away was always constant: we were the talk of the town for quite some time. Interviews took place. Some of them we did together if asked. An event also took place where the plane crash victim’s families and I met. And sure enough, I kept a promise I made on the island. A promise to find and reassure that the son of that flight attendant knew that she was at rest now. I found him there and told his father — the flight attendant’s husband — about the picture and what happened. He took it hard but thanked me and told his son for me later.
After a few months, the news and attention died down a bit. We seemed to get more freedom by the time spring came. It was hard, that time spent apart because of that attention. It was hard to cope. Cope through our time apart, through what happened with my brother, through the terrible attention. But by summer, we made it.
Despite graduating and turning eighteen, we spent a month apart afterward to stay cautious. We did not want to raise suspicion. That’s why we took it slow during the summer and fall, going public. As college came, that took up a lot of my time too. I became a photographer for the local Craftridge paper and a few different magazines. That took years of hard work.
Hard work meaning not much time with Casey. We still managed to make as much time as we could with each other. We began hanging out more, talking more in public, which made people talk. It didn’t matter much by then. I was eighteen, and they had no evidence to prove that we were together before that. We started going on dates and openly got closer.
Then a day happened that I will never forget. We were together for a few years and by then, most of the drama faded. I was twenty-one when that day happened and was very happy. It was one of the best days of my life too. I found that out a couple hours after he asked me if I wanted to go out for the day.
He picked me up that day with a huge grin on his face. Unlike the usual though, he did something different. He blindfolded me before I got in his car, which made me suspicious right away. When I asked why he blindfolded me, he said he wanted to keep where we were going for dinner a surprise. I knew that wasn’t it but played along anyway.
“Is this where I’m supposed to question your plans and maybe start running?” I asked after he blindfolded me and helped me in the car that day. “Are you kidnapping me, Casey? Is that what this is? Because if it is, you’re not doing a good job. Everyone knows you need to tie the victim down so they don’t get away.”
Through feeling the car rumble to life under me, I then felt the vehicle back up. He pulled us out onto the road and began to drive. He chuckled at my words, the lovely sound reaching my ears and making my heart jump. Even after all that time, after so long of being with him, he could still make me shaky at the knees with how he affected me.
That feeling will never wear off.
I remember thinking at that moment. And that feeling never did for the years after that.
“Damn,” he had said, breaking his chuckle and holding it back as he began to speak. “How could I forget to tie you up?!” he exclaimed. “I better just hope you are stupid enough to not do anything. This needs to be a successful kidnapping.”
“And if I struggle?” I spoke, feeling him turn down a road.
Very seriously, he said, “You will experience the full power of my ultimate karate skills. I will open up a big can of whoop-ass on you.”
With great clarity, I recall that I laughed quite hard at that. We drove for a while after that and, in the back of my head, I remember wondering what this could be.
Eventually, he turned one last time and stopped the car, shutting it off. “The kidnapping was a success. Now, you shall suffer!” he had said jokingly. Even in the years after this, he still had that sense of humor I loved.
I remember behind those joking words that day that he sounded somewhat like a nervous little boy. I soon found out why. That day, he drove me to a place that was meant to be a surprise. With the blindfold still on, he took me inside the mystery place that I had already guessed wasn’t a restaurant. Once we were inside, he let me take the blindfold off.
I remember that I couldn’t grasp what I saw. It was an empty house I was standing in. I realized that it was our house. A house he had gotten us like he promised years prior… A house for us to start our lives in. I jumped up and down, not able to get one word out without shouting in happiness. He had bought us a house. A house we could live together in. I was so happy, knowing that day couldn’t get any better.
Except it did. After so long screaming and shouting, expressing my joy, he showed me around the house. I remember being so excited trying to grasp that he had bought us a house. But when we entered our new bedroom, we wouldn’t leave the same. I was admiring the bright windows, still in shock that Casey had bought us a house. But the second I turned around, I recall processing an emotion I rarely felt before, if not ever.
When I turned around, I froze at the shocking sight before me. Casey, on his knee, and looking up at me. I felt my eyes grow, my feet backing up a few steps until the wall was supporting me. My breath became uneven as I watched, my heart never feeling so full in my life. I think he was trying to give me a heart attack that day since he just showed me he brought us a house. And then… he was kneeling in front of me in our new house, in our future bedroom. He held up a ring between his fingers and spoke in a scared and loving voice.
“Janice Reeves.” Those words and eyes, I remember, made me shake where I stood. My eyes began watering too. “You already make me the happiest man in the world just being with me. But I can’t help but be selfish and want you more. Will you be my wife?”
As I think about it today, years later, my heart still swells at the memories of that day. Of getting that house and being proposed to moments later. It was so much to take. My strong nod and tears were so sure at that moment.
When I nodded, I spoke in a shaking breath. “Yes. Yes!” With those words, he slipped the gorgeous diamond ring on my finger. Holding my hand from where he knelt, he fitted the ring perfectly on my finger and kissed it. As he got to his feet, I threw my arms around him, kissing him hard. He hugged me tightly, sharing the same amount of affection.
When we broke away, his face was filled with emotion. “My beautiful bride,” he said, amazed. “You are the love of my life, sweetie,” he said, the last word he nearly cut off when his lips hit mine again. Cupping my cheeks, he kissed me sweetly, so full of love.
So happy. So happy that beautiful day years ago.
And today, years later, came another beautiful day. One I was scared would never come. That’s why I was standing in an anxious cloud, so excited. We came so far, beat every obstacle that faced us. Now, I was waiting for Casey to come home so I could tell him we beat another obstacle.
How was I going to tell him? What would his reaction be? It was ironic that today was the 20th, the third Sunday of June. I bit my lip in a smile, thinking about what he would say. I was so excited to just tell him! I knew he has been wanting this for years just like me. But throughout the years, he never pushed, never said anything, not once. Today, I was going to tell him I could give him what we’ve wanted for a while now.
What would he think? God, I can’t wait to his face. He deserved this, we both did. Our lives would be so different, so complete.
Come on, come on, come on! Get home already.
I wanted to yell through the window at our empty driveway. I was so excited and could feel it through my pacing. My eyes were nailed out the window, waiting for him to get home from helping Brad.
Brad was moving out of his house and into a new one. Casey was helping him so they made a deal. In Brad’s house — well, now his old house — he had a kitchen table he didn’t want, and Casey and I were desperate for a new one. He said that we could have it since he just bought a new one and we were kind of tight on money. Lord knows now we will need to watch how much we spend. This surprise I was about to spring on him would be expensive. It was well worth it already.
Now… I just had to tell him. The opportunity finally came when I saw him pull into our driveway, Brad’s truck pulling in behind him. I noted that the back of the truck was empty, and our new kitchen table wasn’t in it. I wondered why they didn’t have it. Brad’s reason for coming home with Casey was to drop the table off since it wouldn’t fit in Casey’s car. It would be interesting to hear why they didn’t have it. But new feelings came over me that made all other thoughts disappear — fear, nervousness. I was anxious.
I shoved my emotions aside, taking a deep breath. I had to face him. Now. Walking through the living room and entering the kitchen, I got to the door. Another deep breath, I opened it and stepped into the garage that was already open.
I walked down to the driveway, smiling as casually as I could. Watching Casey get out of his car, I felt my heart run in circles. I loved him so much and didn’t know how I was going to tell him what I just learned. As he stepped out of the car, the light from the setting sun lit his features. His eyes were bright as he looked at me, a wide smile spreading too. After these years, he looked the same. His face was a little thinner, his eyes holding more years. He was in his mid-thirties now. Every time I think about his age before, I would become somewhat sad at the fact that he has waited so long for this. Now, I could give this to him.
I heard Brad’s truck door shut and watched as they walked towards me. I walked towards them as well and met in the driveway. Brad crossed his arms, smiling as he nodded hello to me. Over the years, he and I became quite close, a new friendship growing between us. He was such a sweet guy, always messing around with us.
I smiled at them. “So how was the moving?” I asked, looking to Casey.
Ugh, I just wanted to tell him, but I knew this was special.
I wanted to tell him alone and slowly watch the reaction crawl across his face.
When I asked about the moving, I saw Brad give a sneaky smile that said he had something to say. Looking to Casey, I saw him purse his lips but say nothing. He went on with a humorous smile. “It was great. Just great,” Brad said with more meaning behind his voice.
Before I could ask him, I wanted to know what wasn’t in the back of his truck. “So, where is the table?”
Brad looked down, shaking his head. Pursing his amused lips, he looked up to me. Confused at what was so amusing to him, I looked to Casey and saw a small blush flood through his cheeks.