Killing Honor (3 page)

“It’s not my favorite thing.”

He laughed.

The bounce of the plane’s landing gear hitting the runway jostled our entire world. The brakes slowed us almost to a stop. As we taxied off the runway, the captain came over the intercom allowing us cell phone usage. I’d charged my cell back in Germany for the first time in months so I could call Devyn when I landed.

But as it loaded up, I was suddenly struck with morbid fear. What if she had moved on? Her letters never said she had, but it was a real occurrence in the military. What if… she didn’t want me anymore?

“Calling a girl?”

I looked to my side, at the old man who had spoken before. Wrinkles crinkled at the corner of his eyes, and his skin probably hung just a little looser than it once had. The slight smile at his lips put me at ease, strangely enough.

“My wife, actually.”

“You’re young. Already married?”

“Might as well have been married since I was thirteen. She’s owned my soul since the first moment I saw her.”

“Sometimes the good ones hit you early.” The older man agreed. “You Navy?”

I nodded.

“Thought so. Had that look about ya.”

“A look?”

“Yeah. Every service member has that look. Whether it’s the shape of their bodies, or the way they cut their hair. I can always tell what branch they’re from.”

“You got us all pegged, huh?”

He shrugged. “Years of experience.”

I didn’t reply. He didn’t look like the type to be prior military, but by that age, it was a difficult assertion to make.

“Anyway, I’m holding you up. I’ll let you call your wife.”

His timing was perfect, as the plane stopped at the gate and the seatbelt sign turned off. Everyone started moving to get their stuff, but I didn’t. My finger hovered over the call button… and with a quick burst of courage, I pressed the call button and listened to it ring.

Three times it rang before Devyn picked up. “Brody?”

A huge weight lifted from my chest I hadn’t even realized was there. Just the sound of her melodic voice was enough to relax me. Of course, that didn’t surprise me at all. She had that effect on me.

“Hey, sweetness.”

“Plane landed?”

“Yeah, we’re just up to the gate. Gotta hit baggage claim still.” A thought hit me, and I wasn’t sure how to approach it. “Want me to grab a taxi?”

“No!” Devyn exclaimed into the phone. “I mean, Jane is here to watch the girls. I’ll come get you.” Her voice was shaky. Was that fear?

“Who’s Jane?” I didn’t remember her ever mentioning Jane before. But then, I hadn’t really been around much, had I?

“My friend. I met her about a year ago, I guess. She’s been awesome and the girls love her.”

“Your voice sounds amazing. I can’t wait to see you,” I whispered. There was a pause. Did I scare her off? “Dev?”

“Yeah, I’m here,” she said. “I’m on my way out the door. I’ll see you at the baggage claim?”

“Yeah, number one.”

“Okay. Bye.”

“Bye, sweetness.” I waited until she hung up, knowing I had a huge goofy-ass grin on my face. Nope. Nothing had changed for me. I still loved her like the goddamn teenage boy I’d been when I met her for the first time. My hope was that she also felt the same.

When the plane’s passengers began shuffling out of the plane, I stood up and grabbed my small carry-on from the overhead bin, following the line out into the terminal area.

Devyn

I ended the call and stared at the phone. He was here. I had to go. I had to pick up my husband. This was what I had been waiting for patiently for two years. So why was I suddenly terrified? I blew out a breath. “Okay. I have to… Um… I need to go.”

“Go, I’ll watch the girls. Don’t worry.” Jane smiled, two rows of brilliant white showing. I bit my lower lip, looking at the girls and second-guessing my decision.

I met her eyes. “Maybe I should take them. They’ll want to see their dad, right?”

“They don’t even know him yet, Devyn.” Jane pulled Riley onto her lap, and Riley wrapped a small hand around Jane’s index finger. “Wouldn’t you rather they stay here where they’re comfortable, and then you can introduce them properly?”

“I guess.” I frowned. “I just thought… I haven’t seen him in two years, Jane.” My heart was racing. I wasn’t sure if it was anxiety or excitement. Or maybe both. “I don’t know what’s best.”

“You should go. No worries, I’ll keep the girls safe.” A slow grin crept up on her face. “We’ll be right here.”

“Okay,” I nodded, gripping my keys in my hand. “Okay. You’ll be okay here?”

“How many times can one person say ‘okay’ in one breath? Go!”

She made a shooing motion with her hand. I was being stupid. I knew that, but I was nervous as hell.

“Right.” I grabbed my purse, and my phone and headed out the door. As I climbed into my car, my phone went off. I answered it without looking. “Hello?”

“Hey, Devyn!”

Oh, lord. My mother-in-law. This was so not the right time.

“Hi, Vera.”

“Your voice is all shaky. Are you running?”

“No, I’m just headed out.”

“Oh? I was just headed toward your house. I thought I might take the girls for lunch.”

“Yeah, that would be great. Jane’s there, with the girls. I didn’t want to mess with pulling them in and out of the carseats at the airport.”

“The airport?”

As soon as the word left my lips, I realized my mistake. I’d been so focused on getting Brody home I hadn’t told anyone else in the family know he was coming back.

“Is he here?” The woman’s voice trembled, and while I cursed myself, I knew I couldn’t keep it from her. It wasn’t fair.

“Brody just landed. He called me a few minutes ago.”

“Listen, Devyn.” Vera cleared her throat. “I understand that you might want to spend some time alone with Brody…. Um…”

I wanted to bang my head into the steering wheel. The guilt was sinking in. The woman was so freaking good at it. “Um, well, Vera, I’d planned an intimate dinner, but maybe you might like to come for the afternoon?” I was a horrible daughter-in-law. Brody’s parents hadn’t seen their son in two years either, but all I wanted was to hide Brody away and keep him for myself.

“Are you sure we wouldn’t be intruding?”

Of course you would be.

“Of course not. He’s your son. I’m sure he’ll be excited to see you.” I pasted on a smile, even though she couldn’t see me, because that was the only way I was going to keep the disappointment out of my voice.

“Great! I’ll get Ned and Matt and we’ll be there shortly.”

Oh, all of them. Yay. I ended the call with my mother-in-law and tossed the phone in the passenger seat as I exited the Coronado bridge and headed toward the airport on I-5. I’d worry about that in a minute. For now, I had someone very special waiting on me.

~*~*~

As I waited in the San Diego airport, the midday sun streaming through the large windows that made up the front of the airport, I picked at my fingernails. God, nerves flew through my body like my lunch wanted to explode out. I shouldn’t have been this nervous to see my husband, right? We hadn’t been married that long before he left on this deployment.

And I hadn’t lost all the baby weight in the last two years. The girls were with me all the time, unless I got someone to babysit. Going to the gym was kind of impossible. And there was never enough money, even with Brody’s hazard pay, for extra cash to buy a treadmill at home.

What if he thought I was too fat? What if… he came back different and didn’t love me anymore? He hadn’t sounded different on the phone. He still had that lovely timbre I adored, the one that made my insides quake with need. What if he didn’t find me as attractive? Two years of motherhood took its toll on me, as well as managing the house, and paying the bills, and the constant worry that Brody wouldn’t come home to me.

I looked up, and my entire thought process vanished. Brody was different from what I remembered. He carried himself taller. His dark hair was short and crisp, newly cut. His face has stubble growing along his jawline. His eyes, dark and haunted… not like what I’d expected from his amber gaze. He’d always been carefree. He’d never had a worry in the world.

This Brody did.

He was scanning the place as he came down the escalator, and finally, his eyes rested on me. The intensity of his recognition weighted me down to the floor, freezing me in my place as he stepped off the escalator. My heart pounded, so hard I thought it might break out of my chest.

Before now, I’d toyed with the idea that the whole thing was a joke, that it wasn’t real. Brody wasn’t really coming home. It was a hoax. But then I’d spoken to him on the phone. Then I got here, and he was alive and in the flesh in front of me.

He stopped, only a few inches away. My breathing was shallow and loud. The noise from the airport vanished, and for the next few moments, there was only the two of us. I studied him, memorizing every nook and cranny on his face, from his dark, sun-burned eyes to his angular jaw covered in day old stubble.

“Devyn…”

I didn’t have time to overthink anything. His lips came down on mine, his arms around me so tightly I should have been afraid of him snapping my spine. My hands crushed against his chest, my breasts pillowing against him. He felt amazing, firm and hot, and all consuming.

A moment later, he pulled back, and I dragged in a much needed breath. My face burned both with arousal and embarrassment. My first kiss in two years, and he’d already blown my mind.

“I missed you,” he whispered, intertwining his hand with mine. “You look beautiful.”

I didn’t have any words for him. He’d kissed them all away. He smiled, and he led me toward the baggage claim. I couldn’t stop staring at him. He was both at once familiar and strange. I knew him, yet I didn’t. But the one thing I did know? My husband. My lover. My best friend. He was home.

Devyn

Sitting in the driver’s seat and on the highway, I finally got my brain working. I’d never expected to be rendered speechless when I saw Brody again. Cry? Sure. Laugh uncontrollably? Possibly. Cling to him like a sticker? Yes. But stunned into silence? Not at all.

Brody’s hand snaked into mine as I rested it on the center console. I glanced down at it, amazed at the size of his hand. Was it always that big? My hand looked like a child’s inside his.

“This feels awesome.” Brody’s voice was low, but strong.

“Holding my hand?” I asked, knowing my voice had to be shaking. He didn’t seem to notice though.

“It’s the first time in two years I get to hold your hand. It’s the first time I get to touch you, feel the warmth from you.” He needed to stop talking. Not because I didn’t want to hear it, but because if he kept going, I was going to melt into the floorboard, and then we’d wreck and never make it home.

“You’re flattering me, sir.” I chuckled instead, uneasy as his thumb stroked along the back of my hand. Back and forth. Back and forth.

“It’s true.” He smiled, a sad one, not the happy one I’d expected him to have. Brody had always been full of life. He’d been the one that made me laugh. A joker. My joker. This Brody was serious. I hoped it was just because he was overwhelmed about being home. He hadn’t smiled at all except for this one small one, and it wasn’t even a happy smile.

“Well…” I decided to try to be cheery. “Um, Jane is sitting with the girls, and she should be giving them their nap so that we can see them awake when we get home.”

“Jane’s your friend?”

“Yes.” Had I mentioned Jane before? I couldn’t remember.

“You’re not going to wake them because of me, are you?”

“No, I’m going to wake them up because if I don’t, they won’t sleep tonight. And I want them to sleep tonight.”

“Oh.” He leaned back in his seat, quiet.

I didn’t like the quiet. I wasn’t used to it at all, especially not from Brody. Brody was always full of life, a joker. I cleared my throat. “So, I was telling Riley the other day that her daddy was coming home and she kept thinking I said Addy, and then she kept saying that Aunt Addy was going to come visit, which of course led to wondering if Uncle Chris was going to come with her, because they’re twins like she and Jackie are.”