Leave a Candle Burning (38 page)

“I miss Mama,” Corina said with dry-eyed seriousness.

“I miss her too,” Dannan whispered, his own eyes growing moist.

Corina studied him before patting his knee and saying. “Danna sad?”

“I am sad, Corina. I’m sad when people I love die.”

“I love Danna,” the little girl said, and Dannan’s heart couldn’t take anymore. He put his arms around Corina, held her in against his chest, and silently begged her to stop talking. She was too little and vulnerable, and all he could think about was how ill-equipped he was to be her father.

“Where’s my doll?” Corina asked, and Dannan began to breathe again.

“I don’t know. Why don’t you look in your room?”

“You too,” Corina directed, climbing from his lap and taking his hand.

“Okay, here we go,” he agreed, knowing she wouldn’t catch the weary hurt in his voice. They trooped up the stairs together, and Dannan managed to make a boisterous game out of finding the doll.

He would have willingly admitted to anyone who asked that he had a double motive. He hoped Corina would fall asleep right on time tonight. He was ready to be alone.

“Do you have time for a visit?” Scottie asked Reese when she answered her front door Monday morning.

“Of course I do. Come in, Scottie.”

Reese led the way to the parlor. She could see that while Scottie took a seat, an action that was completely normal, there was something on her mind.

“How are you?” Reese asked in her open way.

“I’m not sure. You’re going to think I’m losing my mind, but I wanted to ask you some questions about courtship.”

Reese laughed. “I won’t think any such thing, and besides that, last year at this time I was in the midst of courtship, so you’ve come to the right place.”

“That’s what I thought,” Scottie confirmed, but she just sat there. Reese waited, but Scottie was clearly at a loss for words.

“Has someone caught your attention, Scottie?”

“I don’t know. I just feel so awful. Eli’s death is so recent, and do I have any right even talking to you about this?”

“About what?” Reese asked, already quite sure who the man was but wanting to give Scottie a chance to talk.

“It seems that Eli spoke with Dannan about me. And not just about me but about marrying me. I’m not very happy about Eli doing that, but now Dannan has spoken up, and it seems he is a little interested in me.”

“And you’re not sure what to do?”

“That’s right. I haven’t been close to a lot of men, just Eli and Finn, and there was nothing romantic about that.”

“But with Dannan it’s romantic?”

“I don’t know. I’m not sure what it is.”

“And Dannan hasn’t said?”

Scottie thought about this. There had been lots of words between them, but emotions had been high, and she wasn’t sure she had taken them all in. She had a sudden awful thought that she shared with Reese. “What if Dannan wants a marriage like Eli and I had? Do you suppose that’s what he’s thinking?”

“Like an arranged marriage?

“Yes.”

“I would be surprised if he was thinking that, Scottie.” Reese put it as delicately as she could manage, not wanting to remind Scottie of her husband’s bedridden state.

“But he might,” she argued. “I’m sure he wishes Corina had a mother.”

Reese knew this was not what Dannan had in mind, but she didn’t know if she was the right person to tell Scottie.

“What does that look on your face mean, Reese?”

“I don’t think that’s what Dannan has in mind,” Reese went ahead and said, “but he should be the one to tell you.”

Scottie looked appalled by the very idea. She even came to her feet. “I can’t, Reese. I can’t ask him that. What if that isn’t what he’s looking for? How humiliating for both of us when he has to tell me he doesn’t want that kind of marriage.”

Reese stood and went to her. She was inches taller but bent enough to put her arms around Scottie Peterson and hug her.

“It’s too soon for your heart, Scottie. You’ve just lost Eli, and now you’re trying to take this in.”

“Dannan was sorry,” Scottie said, just holding tears. “He didn’t mean to say all that was said, but now I know that they talked, and I can’t stop thinking about it.”

“Here.” Reese took her to the sofa and sat beside her. “There are some things you need to know. I can’t tell you all of Dannan’s intentions because I don’t know them, but I can tell you something about Dannan MacKay.

“He would never willingly hurt you. His heart is extremely tender and kind. You know that he was attracted to you before Eli died, but did you also know that he fought that in his heart?”

“He told me he’d been drawn to me.”

“Good. Well, he also shared some of his struggles with Conner. Dannan knew it was wrong to have special thoughts of you when you were married. He is a man of honor, Scottie. He is not a man who would play games with a person’s heart or treat her feelings with little regard. And he’s still in his own time of grief. I think there’s still a good deal of shock over Grant and Annie’s death, not to mention in becoming a father.”

Scottie nodded. Her emotions had run wild, and she hadn’t completely considered Dannan’s feelings in this. “Dannan said we were friends, and we just need to proceed from there.”

“I think that’s a good plan, but probably harder to carry out than talk about.”

“I’ve already proven that,” Scottie agreed.

“Why don’t you come to dinner on Sunday? I’ll ask Dannan and Corina too. It’ll just be the six of us.”

“Will Dannan know I’m going to be here?”

“I’ll tell him.”

“What if he’d rather not come?”

Reese looked into the other woman’s face and thought about how similar their childhoods had been.

“We’ve both been abandoned by people who were supposed to love us, haven’t we, Scottie?”

The smaller woman sighed. “We certainly have.”

“I think it makes trusting harder.”

“It must, since I assume that Dannan can’t admit his true motives to me and doesn’t even want to be around me when he’s already talked about the attraction.”

“I’m not trying to throw the two of you together or play matchmaker, but I thought if you could spend some time here, it might help.”

Scottie thanked Reese and accepted the offer. She had to stop herself from double-checking with Reese about whether Dannan knew. She would work on trusting.

“Would you like some tea?” Reese asked, thinking they both needed a cup.

“I would, but to be honest, I don’t want Iris asking too many questions, so I’d better get home.”

Reese didn’t press her, and after seeing her to the door, she encouraged Scottie to come anytime. Reese watched her walk away and began to pray.

“Scottie was here today.” Reese had walked Dannan outside after dinner to talk. She had asked Conner if she should tell Dannan about the visit, and he’d told her yes. She had waited until Troy and Conner returned to the bank, and they now stood on the stone path that led to the front door.

“Is she all right?”

“Mostly, but she’s rather torn.”

“About what?”

“Many things, but one that she mentioned is that you might be seeking a marriage of convenience.”

The look on Dannan’s face caused Reese to put a hand over her mouth so she wouldn’t laugh out loud. Dannan slowly shook his head, his face amazed.

“Eli said she wouldn’t understand, and I really didn’t get it until right now.”

Reese’s look was one of compassion, but she didn’t try to advise him. She knew she’d said enough.

“Thanks, Reese,” Dannan said with a quick hand to her arm. “I can’t tell you what a help this has been.”

Reese hoped he was right. Remembering her conversation with Scottie from that morning, she started to pray again. If Dannan’s plan was to woo and win the Widow Peterson, she wasn’t sure if he truly understood the task that was before him.

Scottie stared into the darkness and wondered if she would ever sleep through the night again. Finn and Iris liked to tease her about napping with Corina, but in truth, she hadn’t slept well since Eli’s death, and napping was about the only thing that got her through.

For a few days she had forced herself to stay awake, leaving Corina alone on the sofa, but that only made her so tired she could barely function. She had ended up making so many mistakes in the account books she knew she couldn’t afford that.

But the nights were so lonely. The house was large and empty, and even if she’d wanted to talk, there was no one down the hall to oblige her.

Scottie gave up after an hour and lit the candle on her bedside table. She read her Bible for a while, amazed as she always was at Joseph’s willingness to trust God. Eventually, Scottie felt her body grow tired. She blew the candle out and asked God to give her Joseph’s faith, marveling as she fell asleep that he kept on no matter what was put in his path.

“Is there anything left to eat?” Dannan asked as he slipped into the Peterson kitchen two days later. “I was going to join you today but got called to one of the outlying farms.”

“Was someone hurt?”

“The woman was in hard labor, but she got through it.”

“Boy or a girl?”

“One of each.”

Iris’ smile was huge when she invited him to have a seat and began to fill a plate. “Coffee, Dannan?”