Letting Go (Healing Hearts) (25 page)

“Great, maybe afterward we can—”

“All rise.”

Everyone stood.

The judge entered the courtroom. “You may be seated. The court reconvenes regarding the matter of Little J Dodd. Is counsel prepared to continue?”

“We are, Your Honor.” The attorneys responded simultaneously.

“Good. I believe we left off with Ms. Simmons cross-examining the witness. Have you finished your line of questioning?”

“Yes, Your Honor,” Diane conceded.

“Counsel for the mother, you may now proceed.”

“Thank you, Your Honor.” Mr. Hixon turned and fixed his eyes on Dave. “I’d like you to make an exception to the rules of order so I can call someone other than the caseworker as my first witness. Given the nature of this proceeding and the loss of the State’s main witness, I pray that the court will agree to my request. Your Honor, I’d like to call Mr. Dave Passel to the witness stand.”

The judge nodded. “You may proceed in that manner.”

Dave’s throat went dry. No one had told him he could be called to testify.

He glanced over at Diane, who shrugged and mouthed, “I wasn’t expecting this either.”

He rose and approached the bailiff to be sworn in, his gut churning. What if he said the wrong thing and Joey was taken from him today? He would never be able to live with himself.

“Raise your right hand. Do you swear that the testimony you are about to share is the truth?”

Dave raised his hand and strained to find his voice. “I do.”

“Could you repeat that, sir,” interjected Judge Taraman. “I couldn’t hear your response.”

“Sorry, Your Honor. I said I do.”

“Very well. You may be seated.”

Dave’s stomach fluttered. He didn’t like the gleam in Mr. Hixon’s eye. Something told him the attorney planned to make him look like a fool. He inhaled deeply and prayed for wisdom as he released the air in his lungs.

“Mr. Passel, how long has Little J Dodd resided in your home?”

“Almost two years.”

“He’s not even three yet, correct?”

“Yes.” He quirked his eyebrows and glanced over at Diane. She scribbled on her notepad without looking up.

“Tell me, do you remember being three years old?”

Dave’s heart skipped a beat. He didn’t like where the questions were leading.

“No. I can’t say that I do.”

The man approached the witness stand. “What makes you sure that this boy needs you so much that he can’t make room in his heart for his own birth mother?”

Dave swallowed hard. Had he been selfish? He closed his eyes, praying that Joleen or Diane would object to the question, but no one rescued him.

Opening his eyes, Dave glanced at the judge. “Um . . . ”

Leanne’s attorney cupped his ear with his hand and smirked. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear your answer. Could you repeat that, Mr. Passel?”

Dave glanced over at Leanne, who glared at him.

Have compassion on her. She’s my child too.

He rubbed his chin. “I’m sorry, could you repeat the question?”

“I asked what makes you sure that Little J needs you so much that he can’t make room in his heart for his birth mother.”

Dave shot up another quick prayer, but no answer came.

He glanced at Diane, who offered a smile. Joleen scowled at him and shook her head. Should he show Leanne compassion?

“I’m not sure. But I think Joey could make room in his heart for her if . . . ” He hesitated. “If someone could ease him into it.”

“If someone could help ease him into it? What do you mean by that?”

“Well, he’s a very sensitive child and doesn’t handle stress or change very well. He gets physically ill. He needs someone with him to facilitate.”

The gleam in Mr. Hixon’s eyes brightened. “Someone like you, Mr. Passel?”

Dave cringed. “Yes.”

Glancing over at Leanne, he noted her shocked expression. Mr. Hixon noticed as well.

“Could I have a moment with my client, Your Honor?”

“You may.”

“Thank you, Your Honor.” Mr. Hixon moved over to Leanne’s chair, bent down, and whispered something in her ear.

She shook her head and growled, “No.”

Mr. Hixon sat down next to his client, and she turned her back to Dave while they spoke so he could no longer see her expression. However, he heard the growl in her voice.

She finally muttered, “I’ll agree. But I don’t like it. I don’t trust him.”

“Very well, then.” Mr. Hixon stood and faced the judge. “I’m ready Your Honor.”

“You may proceed, Mr. Hixon.”

“Thank you, Your Honor.”

Leanne’s attorney paced before the witness stand, and then stopped. Dave’s heart clenched. Leanne didn’t seem to like whatever she had agreed to. He could only imagine the terms as he looked over at Joleen, who pursed her lips in disapproval. When he glanced at Diane, she smiled and nodded at him.

His heart swelled. At least Diane had liked his answer.

Mr. Hixon coughed and smoothed down the few loose hairs on top of his nearly bald head. “Mr. Passel, I think we can end this dispute today.” He stared intently at Dave. “Would you be willing to accompany Joey to all future visits with his birth mother?”

Dave stiffened and glanced over at Diane, who offered a slight nod. Joleen shook her head no.

“I’m sorry. Could you repeat that?”

He had to trust someone. Since God gave him no clear direction, he followed Diane’s advice.

“Um, yes, I would.” He nodded. “Be willing to go with Joey, that is.”

Mr. Hixon faced the judge. “Your Honor, my client is willing to allow Little J to continue to reside with Mr. Passel as long as he accompanies the child on visits and facilitates them to make things easier for the child.”

The judge addressed Diane. “Is this acceptable, Ms. Simmons?”

“Yes, Your Honor. But I do have one request. As long as Joey lives with Mr. Passel, I request that the court insist the child only be called Joey, since that’s what he’s used to. And drop the name Jack . . . for now, anyway.”

“That sounds like a reasonable request. Is the mother’s counsel in agreement?”

“We are, Your Honor.”

“What about the State? Are you in agreement with the foster-adoptive father accompanying the child to visits with the birth mother?”

The caseworker’s supervisor and State’s attorney consulted. “We are in agreement, Your Honor.”

“And the child’s attorney? Ms. Proctor, what say you?”

Joleen sighed and gave a reluctant nod. “Yes.”

“Well, then. I’m glad we were able to finally agree. From this day forward I order that visits take place with the birth mother and child in a public place, such as a park or restaurant. I order the foster father to attend all visits with the child’s attorney present. After two months of consecutive weekly visits, this court shall reconvene and discuss this matter further. In the meantime, the mother will submit to urinalysis testing three days every week, to be randomly selected by the State agency.”

He hit his gavel on the bench. “Court dismissed.”

Everyone stood as the judge exited the room. Leanne gasped, “Three days a week? How can he do that? You never told me that was part of the deal.”

Mr. Hixon laid his hand on Leanne’s back and guided her to the door. “This is really not the place to discuss this.”

The door shut behind them. Dave turned to where Joleen had been sitting and noticed she had slipped out the side door. Dave approached Mrs. Vela’s supervisor.

The man extended his hand. “My name is Ron Smith.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

Mr. Smith nodded.

“Is there any chance of filing another request for termination of Leanne’s parental rights?”

“Not at this time. No.”

Dave’s throat tightened. “So I could still lose Joey?”

“That’s correct. We’ll have to wait and see how she does for the next two months.”

Dave’s shoulders sagged. The war was not even close to being over.

“I apologize for not listening to your concerns before, Mr. Passel,” Mr. Smith said. “As it turns out, Mrs. Vela did have personal reasons for wanting to remove Joey from your home. She won’t be working on the case anymore. You have nothing more to be concerned with there.”

Dave offered his hand. “Thanks for your help.”

“It was my pleasure, Mr. Passel.” He shook Dave’s hand firmly. “At CPS, our goal is to do what’s best for the child, contrary to what the media might have you believe. We don’t always have perfect judgment or employees who follow all the rules, but then again, what company does?”

After he left, Diane came over to Dave. They were the only people left in the courtroom. She leaned toward him. A faint trace of her perfume teased his nostrils. How he wished she wouldn’t get so close. Not when he couldn’t love her the way he wanted to.

“I’m proud of you, Dave. You did the right thing. I think you’re finally trusting God and not trying to win this by yourself.”

Dave inclined his head toward her. “Thanks for your encouragement. I really needed it. I don’t know what’s come over me lately. I haven’t been myself.”

“No matter. What counts is how you’re dealing with today. And I’d say you’re doing a wonderful job.” Her eyes sparkled as she gazed at him, her full lips beckoning

He wanted to kiss her, but refrained. “I’m sorry for hurting you. There isn’t a thing I wouldn’t do to make things work out between us.”

Her eyes teared up. “Don’t ask. You don’t know how much it hurts . . . how what you’re saying tempts me to change my mind.” She pulled away and ran her fingers through her hair.

“Then listen to your heart.”

“No.”

Dave wanted to touch her face, but held back. “Oh, honey,” he whispered. “Why can’t you trust me? I won’t hurt you, I promise.”

She shook her head, “I can’t.”

“But you don’t even know what I’m going to say. I love—”

She jumped up and hurried to the door. “I can’t talk about this anymore. I’m sorry.” Holding her hand over her mouth, she glanced back.

He took a step toward her. “But—”

“We’ll talk later. Please don’t call me. Let me call you.”

And with that, she left. But it felt more as if she’d stepped completely out of his life.

His heart squeezed and a chill raced up his spine. He knew deep down that she wanted him. If only she’d let him hold her one more time. If he could just kiss her and tell her how much he loved her, maybe she’d let her guard down and allow herself to love him too.

Remembering the heat of her kisses, his flesh warmed. But a moment later a strange coldness settled in his chest, chilling him to the core.