Love Inspired Suspense June 2014 Bundle 1 of 2: Undercover Marriage\Collateral Damage\Forgotten Past (22 page)

“Yes, Edward.” Whatever came of this trip, she knew she couldn't leave yet. It was why she'd been so afraid to come in the first place. One didn't just return to the place she'd always called home in her heart, then up and leave without some reconnection. Right now, however, remembering Mom and Dad as they were, and being reminded so forcefully of their deaths, was too much to handle. She needed time alone to digest this sudden turn of events.

She looked up at Nick. “Don't you have work to do? I saw the lawn equipment loaded in that truck with your name on the side. Though last I'd heard you were a doctor practicing in Rockford, Illinois.”

“Long story.”

“You don't have to explain anything to me.”

Nick nodded toward the kitchen. “Coffee to go?”

“I'm fine.”

He rested a hand on her shoulder. “Then let's take a stroll to the clinic.”

All it took was that touch, and Sarah suddenly didn't care that she wouldn't have time alone. She'd been alone for far too long, come to think of it. She gave Edward another hug and stepped out the door Nick held for her.

She caught another whiff of the breakfast smells from down the street. A sense of long-ago loss caught her in its grip as she recalled leaving this home she'd known for sixteen years.

“Does your uncle still run the best diner in town?”

“No. Billy took Parker's over a few years ago.”

“And it didn't go under?”

“Hasn't yet. Uncle Will talked quite a bit about deeding the restaurant to Mom.”

“I bet Billy hated that.” The sight of Billy Parker managing a restaurant would be a new experience. In school he'd barely attended class enough to pass, and that was in a haze of pot smoke.

“You could say that. I was dumb enough to tease one day that Billy was the reason Alec Thompson decided to build the clinic.” Nick strolled along beside her, hands in his hip pockets. “What with the impending food poisoning epidemic we were all sure would kill the town.”

She chuckled. Nick and Billy were polar opposites.

“He kicked me out of the restaurant.”

Sarah laughed out loud. “Served you right.”

“There it is,” he said, nudging her with his elbow. “I knew you had it in you. Remember that one place in the cavern where our voices echoed a half dozen times?”

“Two times. They echoed twice. You always exaggerated.”

“Except when you laughed. Then it seemed to go on forever.”

She couldn't help noticing that her steps grew slower, and that Nick's matched hers. The sun had barely begun to warm the morning air, and it sounded as if every bird in the sky celebrated the warmth after an extra-cold winter.

It wasn't until Nick and Sarah had reached a familiar corner that she realized they would be passing the home where she grew up, a little brick house where she and Shelby had shared a bedroom until they were twelve. A church member had turned the back porch into a third bedroom for Sarah before she and Shelby grew old enough to strangle each other. Her parents had probably tired of being kept awake when their daughters were in the mood to argue.

She smiled at the thought. They hadn't always bickered. In fact, plunged back in time by visual memories, she had greater clarity about it. She and Shelby had chattered and laughed more often than they argued. It was only during those times when Shelby insisted that Sarah do something she didn't want to do that their fights got bad; Sarah never gave in, and Shelby never gave up.

“Memories?” Nick asked.

Sarah kicked at a tuft of clover that forced its way through a crack in the sidewalk. “I was just thinking how relieved my parents must have been after they had that third bedroom built. When Shelby and I were together we were sometimes rowdy.”

“That's because you were so different.”

Sarah's steps slowed. She gave Nick a sidewise glance. “You do realize, don't you, that the whole reason for that Goth chick getup of mine was because I got so sick of people telling us how alike we were.”

He drew a little closer to her side. “The only people who believed that didn't know you.” He reached out and tugged at a short strand of her layered hair. “Your parents never told you how alike you were, did they?”

“Mom dressed us in the same outfits when we were little.”

“I'm sure it was less expensive and faster that way, but that's probably the only reason anyone ever compared you and Shelby. I never had trouble telling you two apart.”

Sarah gently pressed her teeth into her lower lip. How wrong he was...at least about that one time... “Shelby was the outgoing, friendly—”

“Shelby's the extrovert—you're the thoughtful one. It's always been that way. Shelby's thoughts pretty much slipped out of her mouth before they went through any kind of process inside the skull. It was as if she actually couldn't make sense of them unless she could first share them with others—usually you.”

“That's how you could tell us apart? Before my Goth phase, that is.”

He shrugged. “You know, windows to the soul and all that. Shelby's eyes and face were always in motion. She was always looking for someone to talk to even if she wasn't talking at the moment. She had a habit of looking through me, which made it easy to observe her.”

Without thinking, Sarah reached out and caught his hand. “I'm sorry.”

He squeezed back. “I'm not. Now you, on the other hand, were the opposite. Instead of seeking out people who might become a part of an entourage of friends, you chose wisely and permanently, and you kept only a few of the best people with the best qualities.”

“You, for instance.”

He grinned at her. She could lose herself in this man.

“I'm sure the move was hardest on you,” he said.

She liked that he continued to hold her hand. Of course, it wasn't an intimate gesture, it was simply a warm connection of old friends. Right?

“Did Shelby thrive in St. Louis?” he asked.

Sarah released his hand and reached up to shove away hair that had blown across her face in the gentle morning breeze. Even in her absence, Shelby was the topic of conversation, it seemed. “You know how larger schools are. They can be overwhelming.”

“Don't tell me she didn't get top pick for cheerleader.”

“She didn't try.” Sarah closed her eyes briefly, recalling Shelby's mortification and anger when it became evident that Sarah was with child. She'd accused Mom and Dad of leaving Jolly Mill to protect Sarah and their own reputations. The unfairness of her accusation became obvious when Emma was born almost exactly nine months after the night of the party.

“Everyone in Jolly Mill was surprised to hear of Emma's birth.” Nick's voice seemed to grow quieter, and something about it put Sarah on edge.

She silently begged him not to ask for details. “A few months after she was born, Dad decided hospital chaplaincy wasn't for him. He started looking for a church to pastor in Sikeston, which was only a couple of hours' drive from where we lived at the time. Counting first, second and third cousins once, twice and thrice removed, the Russells pretty much make up a sizable portion of the city of Sikeston.”

When they reached the far end of the yard, Sarah glanced toward her old bedroom. Had that bedroom not been built, Emma might not have been conceived. It had been much easier to sneak out the back, all decked out like Shelby—no one had really expected Sarah to attend anyway, had they? “I was stunned to discover that I missed Shelby when we had separate rooms.”

“I'm sure you miss her now.”

Sarah glanced up at him. Was this a moment for honesty, or should she just gloss over his statement? Though Shelby loved Emma, she had obviously never forgiven Sarah for her pregnancy. That was strange, too, because Shelby had volunteered at a shelter for unwed mothers before she married and took off for Africa. Naturally, she would have had high expectations for her own sister, the daughter of a pastor, but wasn't her judgmental spirit also wrong? She knew as well as the rest of the family about the night of Emma's conception, about the spiked sodas.

“I changed when we left here,” Sarah said, instead of responding to his observation. “In fact, I was homeschooled in St. Louis because I couldn't face the crush of huge classes and crowded hallways, teachers who didn't know me and never would.” And of course, the growing child inside her would have drawn a lot of attention. Mom and Dad had given her great compassion while Shelby barely spoke to her. Sarah had been left with no doubt about who would be raising her baby—her parents. They made it clear the moment Emma was born that they loved her as their own.

“I changed, too,” Nick said. “When you left here.”

She looked up at him and studied the strong lines of his face, the eyes that seemed to have darkened to teak in the past few moments. She refused to play the old silent game she'd played with herself as they traveled across the state to St. Louis: Which twin did he miss the most?

“How did you change?” she asked.

“I realized I'd lost my best friend.”

A warm awareness spread through her. Shelby had never been his best friend. “Me, too.”

“I remember the day your family loaded the last of your belongings into your big old Buick and your dad was ready to drive away,” Nick said.

“I ran to your house.”

“You were out of breath when you got there, crying, with all that black makeup streaking down your white face. You were a mess.”

“Aunt Peg held me and let me cry, and she didn't care if I got all that nasty face stuff on her shirt.”

“She cried, too, if I remember correctly,” Nick said. “Dad and I would have joined you, but you know men. We just stood there and looked stupid and cleared our throats a lot.”

“It was the worst day of my life until three weeks ago.”

“I remember it well.”

“You say you changed?” She cast another glance over her shoulder toward the house where she'd grown up.

“I realized I'd become too complacent. Because I'd had a buddy—” He nudged her with his elbow. “That would be you, by the way, and I sort of counted on you more than I thought. And then you were gone. I never was the life of the party, was pretty much a science nerd. I guess if I'd dyed my hair black and borrowed your eye stuff, I'd have been as Goth as you.”

“You hated my Goth phase.”

“Only because it covered who you really were. Anyway, I buried myself in study, got a scholarship, got another scholarship, finished med school at Columbia and never learned how to choose the right friends. At least, not of the female persuasion.”

“But you got married.”

“One would think that a guy who graduated top of his class in med school would have the wisdom to make better choices.”

“Remember we studied that? Intelligence quotient does not necessarily equal common sense. That was my area of expertise. You should've called me when you went looking for that special someone. I could have helped you with that.”

His footsteps slowed. “If you'd still been in my life I wouldn't have needed the help,” he said quietly.

The warmth inside her deepened.

“There's the clinic.” He pointed to a long antiqued brick building a block away to the left of the street. “And the parking lot,” he said. “And I hate to say this, but I don't see a little red VW anywhere.”

Sarah tripped on the edge of the blacktop and gasped. Nick caught her. “She's gone?”

FIVE

N
ick felt the contagion of Sarah's alarm as he rushed with her across the street. He led her through the wide grassy verge to the parking lot, a dozen thoughts shooting through his mind, none good. His suspicions had obviously affected her, and he was sorry for it, but hard as he tried, he couldn't convince himself they were overreacting. Carmen had said she wouldn't let Emma leave, but Carmen didn't know Emma the way he was beginning to know her. If Emma decided to do something, she didn't wait for permission.

What if Sarah was right? Word spread quickly here, and he didn't doubt word had spread about the presence of Emma—the daughter of two people caught in an explosion, possibly murdered. Was a killer set on revenge? Would a killer also set sights on the daughter of those victims?

Sarah caught up with him when he reached the front door of the clinic. “She didn't pass us on her way back to the house. Was the conference center on the map Edward gave her?”

“No, the map ends at Capps Creek, and we didn't give her directions.”

“She could stop and ask anyone on the street.”

He was beginning to realize he should've never talked Sarah into waiting. “Keeping up with her must be like keeping up with an oversize toddler.”

Sarah glanced at the patients in the waiting room and leaned closer to Nick. “Emma takes people by surprise on occasion,” she said more quietly. “She's always been full of energy and curiosity, but now there's more of an edge to her.”

Nick led Sarah to the closed glass reception window, where Carmen was bent over pulling files from a drawer.

As usual, Carmen wore her brightly colored scrubs—this time pink with lifelike bunny faces on her shirt. When she looked up, her green eyes widened and her typical grin spread across her face. Running a hand through newly short, perky blond hair that took ten years from her face, she turned and rushed through an open threshold. Seconds later she opened the large door that led back to the treatment rooms.

“Sarah Russell—that you, girl?” Without waiting for an answer she held her arms out wide and enveloped Sarah in a hug.

Sarah returned the affection in full force, and for a moment, watching her, Nick thought she might once again burst into sobs. All Nick wanted to do right now was find Emma, and he couldn't help wondering at this sudden osmosis between himself and Sarah. He didn't even have to look at her to feel her tension and fear battling the heightened emotions over seeing Carmen after so many years.

Sarah released her cousin. “Carmen, I never realized how much you looked like Mom.” There was a catch in her voice. “We thought Emma was here.”

Carmen reached for a tissue and dabbed at her eyes, and gave one to Sarah as she drew them into the staff break room for some privacy. “Here you go, honey. We started running low on them so I bought a case last week. Everyone's been so upset about our losses, it seems the whole town's swimming in tears. I need to start using paper towels to mop up this mess of a face. Emma and I cried up a storm.”

Sarah held up a hand that successfully stopped Carmen's flow of words. “Emma.”

“I'm surprised you didn't see her. She left a few minutes ago.”

“She didn't come back to the house,” Nick said.

“Uh-oh. You think she went to Parker's? Poor kid's stomach was rumbling so loudly I thought there might be a bear in the waiting room. She said she needed some breakfast. Too bad she didn't wait just a couple more minutes, 'cause Nora dropped off goodies about the time Emma pulled out. Not that they're nutritious goodies, but they'd fill her stomach. I was about to call you at the house and make sure she got there.”

Nick looked at Sarah. “Parker's. Dad told her about their cinnamon rolls last night.” He couldn't help wondering, as he always did, how Carmen could say so much so quickly without taking a breath. It was a gift. Of sorts.

“She told me she got lost finding town last night and she's afraid to wander too far away,” Carmen said. “But no way she'd get lost between here and Parker's.”

“Emma's kind of a wild card,” Nick said. “We don't want to take the chance of the wrong person getting close to her. She wants to get to the bottom of her parents' deaths, and she apparently sees herself as some kind of super heroine.”

Carmen grimaced. “Comes from her mother's side of the family.”

“It may just be fear talking,” Sarah said, “but I need to find her, if only for my peace of mind.”

“Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. Of course y'all are distraught. Why didn't I think? I know what you need to do, though. You and Emma need to mingle a little, let our home folks know who she is. They'll recognize you, of course, but they need to know to watch out for Emma if she's going to be tooling around town like this.”

“I think that's what she plans to do,” Nick said.

Carmen opened a cabinet door, pulled out a purse and removed a set of keys. She shook her head and held the keys out for Nick. “I tend to agree with Edward about those explosions—just can't quite wrap my head around somebody from here actually doing the deed—but of course you're going to worry. Go find that girl. I know you walked here, because I saw you two coming down the street, talking and laughing like a couple of old friends. Take my gas guzzler. That ol' truck's got pipes as loud as a train engine, but it'll get you through town and to the right place.”

When Nick hesitated, Carmen pressed them into his hand. “If you're that worried about her, you'd better take what you can get right now.” She patted his arm and pointed out the window toward a white pickup truck with pink detailing and seating for five.

She walked with them down the hallway of the clinic and out the front door. Before they could leave, however, Carmen caught Sarah by the arm. “You and Emma are staying with me, of course.”

“Nick said you have an alarm system.”

“Sure do, state of the art, put in by our own ex-cop, Gerard Vance.” She grinned. “Oh, and I must also mention I've got my sweet bodyguard at the house—Nina.”

“You never told me about a bodyguard,” Nick said.

“Well, young man, you don't get down here too often, do you? Haven't even been to my house since you got back, and you haven't asked how I stay in shape lately, despite the dangerous treats Nora keeps foisting on us.” Carmen raised her arm to show a muscle. “Not many women my age can brag about that. Nina's the mutt I rescued from a pound last year. I think she's mostly Doberman. I'd advise you to wait until I'm off at noon to move your luggage into my house. You'll need an introduction. Think you'll feel safe enough with all that protection, Sarah?”

“I'm not sure I'll feel safe anywhere right now.”

“Then you might as well be with friends and family.”

Nick edged his way closer to Carmen's truck.

“My house is safe,” Carmen said. “Or if you prefer I could pack a bag and camp out on Edward's living room sofa.” She leaned close and winked. “That'd start a nice, fun little rumor for Jolly Mill residents to sink their teeth into, wouldn't it?”

Sarah gave her cousin a final hug. “I'd better go before Nick takes off without me.”

“Oh, Sarah, you let your ol' cuz teach you a few things about men while you're here. There's no threat of him taking off without you, my dear. Trust me.”

“Carmen,” Nick called over his shoulder. “I'm thirty feet away. I can hear you.”

Carmen chuckled and slapped Sarah on the shoulder. “We'll talk later.”

Sarah slid into the passenger side of the pickup and buckled up, obviously not willing to make eye contact with Nick. Her cheeks were slightly pink. “Off to Parker's?”

“You can smell Billy's smoked, greasy meats all over town on Saturday morning, which is the only reason his business is still booming years after Uncle Will retired to Florida. I'm surprised half the town hasn't dropped dead of heart attacks.”

“I thought you said Emma'd be safe with Carmen.”

“Yes, I did say that, didn't I?” He glanced at Sarah, who sat facing straight ahead, shoulders stiff, gripping her hands together in her lap so hard her fingertips were white. “If we do find the Beetle at Parker's, will you try to calm down just a little?”

She looked up at him, and he could read a soul-deep vulnerability in her eyes.

“Remember what I told you last night? You're not alone, Sarah.”

“She's my responsibility, and I know how impulsive she can be. Maybe I'm overreacting, but I can't take any chances with her.”

“I'm catching on pretty quickly to her tactics. Let me take some of this load, okay? You won't be any good to yourself or Emma if you give in to panic.” He placed a hand over hers.

Sarah felt the warmth of Nick's hand melting into her icy fingers. She hadn't realized how tightly she was wound. She focused on releasing some of the tension, flexing her shoulders, scooting more deeply into the seat, and was glad the truck didn't have a manual shift, because that allowed Nick to keep his hand on hers long enough for her to release at least a little of the stiffness in her grip as he drove from the clinic lot.

“Since I attended med school in Missouri, I have a license to practice medicine here,” Nick said. “I'm going to do that right now. From what I've seen, and from what I've experienced, myself, I'm diagnosing you with PTSD.”

She shook her head. “I can handle this.”

“You lost both your parents and suddenly became the guardian of a very headstrong teenager who also, most likely, has PTSD mingling with grief after discovering their deaths might have been murder. You tell me if you aren't experiencing some symptoms of PTSD.”

“Enough with the poor-little-Sarah routine, okay? You're doing what you need to. Maybe I do have PTSD, but I'll deal with it.”

Nick removed his hand so he could pull into a slot down the street from Parker's, which was practically surrounded by automobiles this time of morning—and one of those cars was a red VW.

The relief that rushed through Sarah made her light-headed. She opened her door and slid out. “Time to drag our wanderer back with us.”

He joined her. “Or we could just sit with her and share her breakfast.”

“Not me, thank you. Her thing for breakfast is green smoothies. Does Parker's serve green smoothies?”

“You're not going to believe this, but yes. Some of the ladies of the town ganged up on my poor cousin a few months ago, apparently, and told him they would no longer eat here if he didn't start preparing some healthier fare. Remember Petra Journigan? She came to our school her sophomore year, when we were seniors. Red hair, freckles, friendly.”

“Dated Billy for a while, but had a huge crush on you?”

Nick looked askance at Sarah. “No way.”

“She did—I could tell. Girls see things guys like you never see.” Such as how much his best friend adored him.

“If you say so. Anyway, she left after graduation, then a few months ago she came back to Jolly Mill and got a job at Parker's. Best cook he's ever had.”

“Is she dating him again?”

“Nope. She's seeing Alec Thompson. Anyway, she experimented with some smoothie recipes and Parker's now has a booming business with the health nuts in town, and in Pierce City and Monett. Carmen claims to have lost twenty pounds because of those smoothies.”

“I thought she attributed that to her dog, Nina. Am I confusing Petra with someone else, or was she the one who came to school with bruises? I used to see them when we dressed for PE.”

“I heard rumors. I think Dad had a talk with the family, though he never mentioned it to me. I followed him one day when he went to their house, and for a while things seemed better in the rumor mills. She was sure in a hurry to leave after graduation, though. Now she's creating new dishes and catering for Parker's, so she did something constructive since graduating.”

He opened the squeaky front door and held it for Sarah while the scents of smoked meats, freshly brewed coffee and maple syrup wafted from the huge dining area. Sarah's stomach rumbled almost loudly enough to be heard above the chatter of a couple dozen diners. How could someone walk into this place and be accosted by such wonderful aromas, then settle for a thick, green swallow of sludge?

“Sarah Russell!” called a handsome man from a table by the coffee bar.

Sarah recognized Alec Thompson immediately. Everyone would know Alec, since he and his mother, Nora, owned multiple businesses in Jolly Mill. His sandy-brown hair was shorter than she remembered, his eyes just as dark as those of his mother, and just as filled with intelligence. But as he left his table to greet them, Sarah searched the crowded room for Emma. And didn't see her.

She accepted Alec's quick hug, warm greeting and commiseration about her loss, while feeling that insistent worry return.

“Alec, good to see you again.” Nick placed a hand on Sarah's shoulder and squeezed. “We could use your help. You see that red VW out there?”

Alec nodded. “Sure did. A sweet young thing climbed out of it, didn't even look old enough to drive, and came in here, ordered a smoothie to go, paid for it and left. She took off walking with her smoothie. Someone said they saw the VW at your house early this morning.”

“That's right.”

“She a visiting relative of yours, Nick? Because I could've sworn she looked just like your mama's school picture hanging in the high school upper hallway.”

There was just the briefest of hesitations before Nick said, “She's Emma Russell, Sarah's baby sister.”

“You don't say.” Alec gave Sarah a long, astute appraisal, then turned narrowed eyes to Nick. “And all the time I watched her I was thinking how much she looked like a Tyler.”

Sarah swallowed hard. She could feel the men's attention on her. “H-how long ago did you say she left Parker's?”