Read Loving Lydia (Atlantic Divide) Online
Authors: Diane Saxon
He leaned forward and took hold of her free hand, and before she knew what he was doing, he tugged her outside where it was lighter and the air was clear. She could hear her own rapid, panicked breathing and wondered what he must think of her. Her ice cold fingers were held fast in his hand. He pulled her up close and ogled her.
“So, how is it that you and your boyfriend ended up in my stables at this time of night?”
“I don’t… He isn’t… I wasn’t…”
Frantic, she gulped in air and thought that if she didn’t stop, she was going to faint at his feet, and if he was sensible, he’d leave her there and walk away. Her panic-stricken eyes met his as he leaned forward. He placed his smooth, warm lips against her cold ones and kissed her, long and slow. When she tried to step back, he wrapped his arms loosely around her and pulled her in.
She moved with a suddenness that had him sucking in his breath. Her arms came up around his waist, she tucked her head beneath his chin, and she plastered her body up against his. She couldn’t control the shudders that wracked her body as he stood silently while she shook in his arms. She wasn’t crying. She couldn’t cry. The tears had dried in an instant, but this was pure, unadulterated aftershock.
“Lydia, sweetheart.” He pulled away so he could look down at the top of her head. She tucked her face further into the open neck of his shirt, not wanting to look at him, not wanting to see his judgment.
“I’m sorry.” She mumbled the words against his smooth warm skin, almost burrowed into him, taking comfort in the safety of his arms until he prized her away and tilted her chin up with his fingers.
“What in hell have you got to be sorry about?” His voice was sharp like an ice cold shock of water, but it seemed to have the effect he wanted as Lydia stood stock still for a moment before she allowed her arms to drop from around him. The ice in her veins was chased out by the heat of humiliation and a fair share of anger. She turned, her head held high, and started to walk toward the house. She heard his heavy sigh as he strode after her,
“Lydia.”
“Leave me alone.”
“Lydia, for Christ sake, hold on.”
She stopped suddenly, and she felt the touch of his chest on her back as he almost ploughed into the back of her.
“I came to apologize to you.” Her voice was clear and proud.
“I told you, if I needed an apology…”
Irritation surged as she whipped around to face him.
“You needed an apology.” Forceful and precise, she felt the need for him to understand. She held his gaze for a moment and realized he probably had no idea what she was talking about. She felt the frustration ease out of her and reached out, placed a hand on the top of his arm, and rubbed his taut muscles.
“I was unforgivably rude to you the other day, and I’ve been waiting for you to come back so that I could apologize. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” She took a step closer and stared deep into his placid eyes. “Sam, I’m sorry I was such a bitch.”
“You weren’t a bitch, Lydia. You were just flexing your new-found muscles.” He lifted his hand and rubbed a thumb across her cheekbone, and she wondered how it was that he seemed to know her so well. It hardly cheered her to think that, but she’d come to hold out an olive branch to him, and she considered she should complete the task.
“I wanted to say that if the offer is still open, I’d like to come out with you tomorrow night.” She felt so nervous as she stood there biting her lip, her eyes wide and anxious. She wondered if he was even still interested after everything that had happened. Perhaps he didn’t think she was worth the effort.
“So, is it all over between you and Buddy?”
She snorted and stepped back.
“It never got off the ground.”
Sam took a step toward her, and she took another back. A smile tugged at her lips.
“So, Lydia. Tomorrow night. Is it a date?”
He took another step forward, and she stepped back again.
“Ummm, Sam. Do we have to call it that?”
She took another step back; he took two rapid ones forward and took hold of her wrists to keep her still.
“Yes, we do.”
“Why?”
“Because, honey, at the end of the evening I’m going to want to make out with you, and I don’t want any misconceptions.” Shock rippled through her, and her pulse rate kicked up again. She knew from the intent look on his face that he could feel it as it thundered away where his thumb rested on her wrist. It wasn’t fear that had it racing this time but desire.
“What exactly do you mean by ‘make out’?” He smiled and made her breathless. He pulled her closer for a quick kiss on the mouth.
“Well, for a start, we’re going to be doing some kissing.” He placed his mouth tenderly on hers, and she couldn’t help but sigh.
“What else?” Her voice turned lazy.
“Well then, I think it would be acceptable to do some touching.”
“Touching … where?” She hauled in a languid breath as his mouth cruised from her lips, down her neck, to the rapid pulse beat at the base of her throat.
“It’s only our first date, so we’ll keep it above the waist.” He gently nipped her neck and moved his mouth quick to catch her gasp with his lips. “Course, I may want to touch under your clothes.” He kissed her eyelids.
“Really?” she sighed, and then suddenly jerked upright and pulled out of his arms as she realized what he had said.
“No, I was just trying to see if you were paying attention.”
“I was.”
“Uh huh.”
“Of course I was.”
He laughed. She thought she sounded defensive.
“You look pretty tonight, Lydia.” He raised his hand, brushed her hair back from her face, and made her sigh.
“I have to go now.” She walked backward away from him and he watched. She couldn’t help it as she brought her hand up to her mouth and chewed on her thumb nail as she studied him. He made her wonder.
“I’ll pick you up at eight.” His voice became louder as she got farther away. Then she stopped. Perhaps she should tell him.
“Sam, I’m scared.”
He looked as though he could barely hear her as he squinted at her through the dark and stepped forward. “There’s no need to be scared, honey. I’ll look after you.” She knew he didn’t quite understand.
“No … I’m scared of you.” Looking insulted, he opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, she rushed on.
“I’m scared of how I feel about you. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before … and it scares me. I thought you should know.”
Not giving him a chance to reply, she spun around and ran across the field the rest of the way home as he stood alone in the dark.
Chapter 6
She was a bag of nerves. She’d spent the entire day wondering what to wear. She’d never spent that long in her life on an outfit, but somehow it seemed important.
He’d said he was going to touch her. Above the waist. She wanted him to. Oh, she really wanted him to. She didn’t want to think any further than above the waist. She kept daydreaming. She could almost feel his hard work-hands on her body. It drove her crazy. She was scared to death. What if she freaked and couldn’t bear for him to touch her? She couldn’t imagine it, but what if she panicked? What if she froze? What if he called her frigid?
“Stop it!”
“Pardon?” Kate was eyeing her over the top of the children’s climbing frame.
“I’m sorry. I was trying to stop my imagination running away with me.”
“You’re worried about tonight.”
“Of course I am. Wouldn’t you be?”
“No, but then I’m not you, and I haven’t been through what you’ve been through.” Kate watched her closely. “Do you think you should tell him?”
“No.”
“But… It may help if he knows why you’re so…”
“Frigid?”
“No, that’s not what I was going to say, and you’re not frigid, but you have concerns and rightly so. He may be able to help if he knows.”
“No.”
“Okay.”
“Just okay?”
“You’ll tell him when you’re ready.”
“I will.”
Lydia stared down at her hands for a moment.
“Kate, I really like Sam. I mean really… he makes me feel sort of warm inside.” She rubbed her stomach and glanced up at Kate, smiling. “I think I might…” She stopped herself before she said too much, but she felt the excitement coursing through her veins. “I’ve never felt this way before.”
Kate smiled at her and stepped up to give her a warm hug.
“Go and get yourself ready. Take your time, pamper yourself. Jack and I will get the kids off to sleep. They’re safe with us.” Kate pushed her in the direction of the door. “Don’t wear jeans. Borrow anything you need. I’ll let you know when he’s here.” As Lydia stepped away, she could have sworn she heard Kate mutter, “After I’ve had a quiet word with him myself.”
* * * *
Kate was sat with her feet up eating ice-cream with the television on low when Sam arrived. As he walked light-footed and hopeful through the door with a happy grin on his face, Kate snapped the remote and the television went blank. Sam’s smile winked out as he looked straight into his sister-in-law’s cold eyes.
“If you hurt my little sister, I will flay your skin from your bones.” Icicles dripped through her pure English voice. “I will stretch that skin out on the desert floor and let the ants crawl all over it.” Her eyebrow lifted as her eyes pierced through his soul. “I will lay your bones out to be bleached white by the sun.” Her lip curled. “And I will place your head beside them so that the carrion can come and peck your eyes from your head.” She paused a moment while he stared back at her. “Do I make myself clear?”
He huffed out a breath and then grinned at her, rolling his eyes in sympathy.
“So, still not gone into labor then, Katie?” He sat down heavily next to her and almost bounced her off the settee as he reached over her for the ice cream. She growled low in her throat as he scooped a big spoonful and shoveled it into his mouth, still grinning around it. She snatched the spoon back out of his hand, smacked his shoulder with it, and glared at him.
He pulled her into his arms, kissed the end of her nose, and then whispered in her ear.
“I love you, Katie, and I’m starting to love your little sister. I can’t promise never to hurt her, but I’ll do my damnedest to make her happy, and I promise that I won’t ever mistreat her.” He pulled her closer and kissed her straight on the lips.
“Get your hands off my woman,” Jack growled from the doorway. “Go get your own.”
“I’m just flirting with yours while I wait for mine to show up.” Sam smirked.
“Oh, second best, am I?” Kate gave Sam a hard shove off the sofa.
As he got up off his knees chuckling, Lydia walked through the door, and the sight of her practically brought him back to them again.
She wore a slick little black dress that hugged every curve and indent of her neat, little body and stopped just short of mid-thigh. It was asymmetric with a full length sleeve on one side and a thin, shoe-string strap on the other, which revealed smooth skin that had turned golden during the last few weeks on the ranch.
He’d never seen her with her hair down, but she’d loosened it tonight, and it fell in a soft curtain around her sun-kissed shoulders. She’d smoothed something smoky and sexy on her eyelids, and her eyelashes appeared twice their normal length. The pale pink, shiny stuff she’d applied to her mouth glistened sexily.
Sam’s eyes roamed down the length of her to the kick-ass high heels she wore with diamante studding over the back that ran all the way down the heels. His tongue dried up in his mouth so he couldn’t swallow, and his eyes nearly popped out of his head.
“Am I over-dressed?” Lydia asked with an anxious look.
“Nope,” said Jack a little too quickly.
“Hell, no,” Sam drawled when his tongue came unstuck from the roof of his mouth.
“You look fabulous,” Kate murmured as she glanced from one handsome male to the other, patting her chest as though it ached. “You better keep an eye on her, Sam.”
“I don’t think I’m going to have any difficulty with that,” he replied, sure that he’d be unable to peel his eyes away all night.
“Have a good time. The children will be fine. Carl said he’s on hand to babysit if I go into labor, so don’t worry.”
“Kate.” His voice came out low and guttural as a thought occurred to him. “I need to borrow your car. There’s no way in hell I can boost her into my truck.”
He couldn’t take his eyes off Lydia as they got into the car. When she turned to put her seat belt on, his pulse rate doubled as her small cleavage flexed beneath the little black dress. His mouth watered and his fingers itched.
He drove toward town for a few minutes and almost chewed the side off his cheek while Lydia sat next to him in uncomfortable silence, linking and unlinking her fingers in her lap. They hadn’t spoken, and the heavy silence became unbearable.
Exasperated, he threw the car over to the side of the road, killed the engine, and turned the headlights off, leaving just the glow of sidelights and the dashboard to light up the inside of the car. He could feel Lydia’s uneasiness increase as he turned to face her. He snapped the catches to release both their seatbelts.
“Lydia, I’m going to get this over and done with now, before I’m rendered incapable of speech.”
She fidgeted and tucked her hair behind her ear. He leaned forward and untucked it again, leaving his hand on her cheek.
“You look so beautiful. I nearly swallowed my own tongue tonight.” He felt her small smile against the palm of his hand. “I knew you were sexy, but what you’ve done to yourself is almost X-rated.” He felt her pull back. “I don’t mean that in a bad way. I may not use the right words because you’ve made my brain turn to slush and my heart do somersaults, and I haven’t even touched you yet. I think you may just cause a riot tonight, and if you do, I may not be responsible for my own actions.”
He leaned his forehead against hers.
“Lydia, I know I said that we’re going to take it nice and slow, but I’m so close to losing control with you that you’re going to have to keep me in line. If you give me any opportunity, I’m going to take advantage of you. I’m going to have you naked, apart from those heels, before you can blink. So tell me ‘no’ now and make it damned clear.”