Marriage Seasons 01 - It Happens Every Spring (38 page)

Steve sniffed and mustered a smile. "Nice," he said.

"Charlie Moore gave it to me." She returned to the counter, but
kept talking. "The asparagus is from his garden too. At the TLC
meeting today, Esther heard me mention pasta primavera, and she
insisted on giving me the makings for more than we can possibly
eat."

"Oh," Steve managed.

"You won't believe what Esther has up her sleeve this time. She
wants all of us to stage a protest march in front of the new adultvideo store at the Tranquility mall. It hasn't even opened yet, but
she's found a megaphone, and she's figured out a way to print flyers. Charlie is going to plaster his golf cart with signs and drive it
around and around the parking lot, tooting the horn, while the rest
of us walk behind him carrying placards."

Realizing he couldn't escape and shouldn't want to, Steve set his
briefcase on the floor. "Who's going to be participating in this protest?"

"The TLC. I told you about us, remember? We meet at Just As I
Am. We used to be called the Tea Ladies' Club, but now we're the
Tea Lovers' Club, and Cody is a full-fledged member. Does this
tomato look fresh to you?"

She crossed the kitchen floor to him again. Steve inspected the
tomato, which had a suspicious hole near the stem. "It's either a
worm or the birds have been at it."

"I'm not taking any chances," she said, swinging away from him
and tossing the tomato into the garbage can. "Speaking of the TLC,
did I tell you that Ashley Hanes and I are making bead necklaces?
We're going to give them as Christmas presents. Ashley and Brad
have invited us to dinner on Sunday, by the way. And Brad has
agreed to build a bridge over our drainage ditch."

As Brenda spoke, Steve studied his wife. He recalled the weeks
when she had dragged around in her bathrobe, and he almost
wished that woman were back. It would make his misery a lot easier.

Today Brenda looked pretty, he had to admit. Her blonde hair
was bouncy and soft, cut just the way he liked it. She wore a pale
pink top and a pair of shorts. Her bare feet had always intrigued
him with their tiny toes and pink polish.

Throughout their courtship and marriage, Brenda's petite figure and shapely legs had always been able to stir something inside
her husband. If he weren't so confused, Steve realized, he could
almost start feeling that way about her again-his heart beginning
to thump and his hands itching to trace over her shoulders and
down her silky arms. Brenda had impulsively hugged him once
and they made a habit of walking hand in hand, but Brenda still
kept to her side of the bed, and Steve never made any attempt to
touch her.

"None of us could believe what a fantastic job he had done,"
Brenda was saying as Steve tried to refocus his attention. "He polished all the mirrors, swept the floor, scrubbed the sinks, and
mopped the back room-and that was just during the meeting. Patsy was thrilled to death. Cody wanted to keep working, so I said
that was fine and came on home to start the pasta. Patsy's taking
him out for supper, and then she'll bring him back here later
tonight. Isn't that wonderful?"

"Cody?" he asked.

"You saw how he washed our windows over and over. He's like a
cleaning machine once he gets going. Esther is going to have him
shake out her rugs and do some dusting. She said she'd pay him
minimum wage."

Surprised to hear the animation in Brenda's voice, Steve
instinctively responded. "Cody could clean the offices at the
agency for me," he said. "That woman I hired doesn't show up half
the time."

"Really? That's awful. But good for Cody." Brenda's green eyes
shone as she looked at Steve. "You'd really hire him to clean? I
could drive him over in the afternoons-"

"And I'll bring him home with me at night."

"Oh, honey!" Brenda threw her arms around Steve and gave
him a kiss on the cheek. As if suddenly catching herself, she
stepped back quickly. "That's so nice of you. I think Cody can
accomplish a lot if he gets the chance to try."

Still reeling from the kiss, Steve discovered he couldn't make his
mouth form any audible words. Brenda had hugged him. Kissed
him. Just like the old days.

He had to sit down.

"I'll be in the living room," he called to her over his shoulder.

Did he want Brenda's affection? He sank into his favorite chair
and leaned his head back. Trying to please her had meant cutting
into his profits at work and annoying some of his agents. One had
told Steve he was quitting when he found another place to work.
Was all that loss and trouble worth it? Were the sacrifices going to
pay off in something he even wanted?

"I don't know what to think about that protest march," Brenda
said from the kitchen.

She had always spoken to him while he thumbed through the
lake area's daily newspaper-checking his ads and scanning those
of the competition. This felt so normal. Eerily normal, Steve
thought as he shut his eyes and tried to relax.

"I don't mind making some kind of public statement," she was
saying. "But I doubt a protest march will do any good. Pete Roberts
told Patsy that the new tenant is getting boxes of stuff delivered at
his store every day. Nothing is going to make that man move. It
could affect the school-bus route, you know. Oh, and I have the
worst news. Luke Lockwood-one of the cute little twins?-well, it
looks like he has diabetes. The worst kind too. Kim told us about it
today at the TLC meeting. I felt so awful for her. Our kids had the
usual colds and broken bones, but we never went through anything that serious. I promised we would pray for the Finleys, and
the club wants to do whatever we can. Do you know much about
diabetes? Doesn't your cousin have it?"

Steve cleared his throat. "Yeah, Robbie. He doesn't talk about it
much."

"Kim sounded so scared." Brenda's voice grew louder suddenly,
and Steve opened his eyes to find that she had walked into the living room. She held out a glass. "Would you like some iced tea?"

He took it and set it on the table beside his chair. "Thanks."

She stood for a moment in silence. Then she squared her shoulders, circled his chair, and dropped down into his lap. "Tell me
about your day." She leaned her head against his neck. "Did you
sell any houses?"

Steve couldn't move. He had longed for this. Physically ached
for it. And now here she was, in his lap, snuggled up next to him.
Yet he felt cold, stiff, unable to budge.

"No," he said. "Not today."

"Did you show some?"

"A few."

"Where?" she asked, her voice shaky and slightly breathless. "In
town or lakeside?"

He forced his hand up from the arm of his chair and set it on her
shoulder. "Lake," he said, feeling as though he were an actor playing a part in a rerun of their former life. "One of them should go in
a few days. Price is right."

She was trembling. "Does it have a nice view?"

"It looks out over the main channel," he mumbled, letting his
hand slide down to her elbow. "It's on a point, though, and the
home's lake access is in a quiet cove just off the channel. It has huge
windows, a paved driveway, a stone fireplace, and a two-slip dock
with lifts."

"Wow."

As Steve allowed his arm to move around Brenda's back, he felt
something damp on his shoulder. She was crying. As hurt as he
was-as painful as the reality that wouldn't go away was-he
couldn't stand to think of Brenda's tears. Lifting his other arm, he
encircled her and drew her close against him. "Oh, honey." He
closed his eyes and sighed. "Brenda ... I've made it my goal to work
toward a happier marriage." He looked at her. "I know it may take
a long time and be very hard, but I'm determined."

"Thank you, Steve," she whispered. "I'm so sorry. I made terrible mistakes and bad choices. I did everything wrong. I'm just so
... so sorry.

He stroked her hair, marveling at the silky touch of each strand
against his fingertips. Then he ran the side of one finger down her
cheek, gathering up tears and rubbing them away. "Shh," he said.
"Don't cry, honey."

"Sometimes I hate myself so much that I don't think I can stand
it. If my friends hadn't supported me through this, I don't know
what I would have done. And you ... you finally listened to me.
You changed your schedule and reshaped your whole life, and I
don't deserve it. I don't deserve anything good after what I did to
you.

He swallowed at the lump in his throat again. And suddenly he
realized what that lump was.

He had been blaming Brenda for her shortcomings and mistakes, and it was time to forgive. But there was more. He saw the
truth in her eyes and allowed it to penetrate his heart for the first
time.

He had failed her too.

She had been trying to tell him how deeply his abandonment
had hurt her. Instead of admitting the part he had played in their
problems, he'd laid all the blame at her feet. Again and again, she
had begged him to forgive her, and he felt he was finally ready to do
everything he could to set her free from the burden of her guilt.

He was carrying the same burden.

"Brenda, listen to me." He held her as close as he could and
kissed the top of her forehead. "I failed you too. I didn't want to
admit it, but you were right. I've been trying to deny the truth right
up to this very minute, but I just can't do that any longer. I did love
my job too much. I gave it first place in my life. The way I feel about
it is different from how I feel about you, but the end result is the
same. I took you for granted, and I abandoned you. I know I did."

"I forgive you, Steve." Brenda brushed at her eyes, trying to stop
the tears. "I've missed you so much."

Steve held her in his arms, feeling the sweet curves and gentle
outlines of his wife. Then he cupped her cheek with his hand and
turned her face to his. "I forgive you too."

As their lips met, a rush of relief poured through him. The dam
of resentment, anger, and hurt had cracked open, and for the first
time in ages, joy and peace began to trickle through.

Patsy could have just about died of embarrassment when Cody
barged through the front door of the Hansens' house after their
chicken-fried steak dinner at Aunt Mamie's. Steve and Brenda
were curled up together in a living-room chair, smooching and crying and giggling like a pair of lovebirds. At the intrusion,
Brenda gasped and sat up, her cheeks flushed with surprise.

Cody was oblivious. "Guess what!" he announced. "I got a job.
A forever job. Patsy's going to pay me to clean her salon every day,
and that means you know what-hot dogs!"

As Brenda pulled herself together and Steve raked his fingers
back through his hair, Cody marched around the room in front of
them.

"Hot dogs every day," he told them. "When you have a job, you
can buy hot dogs. I'll share mine with both of you too, because I'm
a Christian. And Patsy told me I can sleep in the back room if I
want. She's going to get a bed and sheets. A real bed! And there's a
bathroom and a shower too. How about that?"

"He can't really be living there," Patsy said, wringing her hands
together and wishing she could make a discreet exit from the
Hansens' house. "It's zoned commercial, you know. But I figured
Cody could sleep there one or two nights a week anyway."

"He can stay here, too," Steve offered. "We've got plenty of
room.

"Inside?" Brenda asked. "Inside the house .. . with us?"

"I used to think Jesus lived here," Cody said.

"He does, Cody. We invited Him back. But there's room for
you, too." Steve smiled and winked at his wife. "Sure, Cody's welcome. You got all the mice out of his hair, didn't you?"

"All gone!" Cody assured him. "And Esther Moore told me I
could sleep at her house too. I have more houses than anybody, all
of a sudden. I sure do wish my daddy was here. He would be so
happy to see me. He would say, `You made your way, Cody.' And I
have."

"You sure have," Patsy echoed. "Well, I guess I'll leave Cody
here tonight and head for home. It's going to be a long day at the
salon tomorrow."

"Speaking of which," Steve said. Brenda made to stand up, but
he pulled her back into his lap and wrapped his arms around her. "A while ago, I was thinking about going into commercial real
estate. I considered buying the Tranquility mall as an investment. I
thought I had a partner, but eventually we decided not to go
through with it. I hope you'll tell the other women that I did make
an effort."

"A partner?" Brenda asked. "To buy the mall?"

"It was just an idea. Jackie Patterson wanted to invest in the project, but ... well, I just felt it wasn't the way I wanted to go."

"You decided not to go through with that?"

Brenda stared at Steve till Patsy began to worry that she was
going to get upset with him. Why hadn't she kept Cody out a little
longer? He had wanted to go to the Dairy Queen for ice cream after
dinner, but she was trying to lose weight as usual, and she had
vetoed it. The memory of Brenda sitting in her rocker like an Egyptian mummy and Steve trudging around with a frown on his face
brought up a lot of discomfort. If these two were going to start having trouble with each other again, Patsy wanted to be long gone.