Married for Christmas (Willow Park) (13 page)

But, for some reason, it felt like he was invading her soul,
and she wasn’t entirely comfortable with what it revealed about her.

“Being connected to other people doesn’t happen magically,
you know,” he added, a dry smile in his voice. “You’ve got to do some of it
yourself. You have to take a risk. You have to let yourself be vulnerable.”

“Fine, fine. I’ll try to be better. Shall we have a little
self-help session with you now?”

He chuckled. “I’d rather not.”

“That’s what I thought. You can dish it out, but can’t take
it. Typical.”

He stood up, smiling at her grumpy face. “Do you want some
more wine?”

“Yeah.” She handed him her glass and stared at the fire
until he returned.

“The tree looks great,” he said sitting down again and
grabbing another handful of caramel corn. “Except it’s missing something.”

“What?” She scanned the tree, which she thought looked
perfect.

“Why didn’t any of my peanuts end up on the tree?”

She choked as she remembered the peanuts painted in red and
green he’d made in elementary school. She’d seen them in his ornament box but
had passed them over.

“I don’t know,” she murmured smoothly. “I must have missed
them.”

“They’re my favorites. I made them when I was seven.”

“They look like it.”

“Ah ha! I knew you rejected them on purpose!”

“I must have missed them when I was decorating the tree, but
I remembered them when you mentioned them just now.”

“Don’t try to con me. You did it on purpose. I’ll find them
tomorrow and add them to the tree.”

“I think it looks good now.”

“It will look better with the peanuts.”

“It will look ridiculous with the peanuts.”

“They’ll give it character.”

“Yeah, character like a nursery school.”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing, if the tree is
in
a nursery school. Our
tree has plenty of character without them.”

“Lila always let me put them on.”

“Well, I’m not Lila.”

The argument had been fun and playful, but suddenly the mood
shifted.

Wishing she hadn’t said the final comment, Jessica stared at
the fire for a minute. “Sorry,” she said at last.

“Don’t be.”

She glanced at him and saw he didn’t look upset. Poignant
but not upset.

It gave her courage enough to pursue the topic. She wanted
him to be able to talk about Lila with her. She didn’t want Lila to be this
silent, impenetrable barrier between them. “Did you and Lila have any
traditions for Christmas?”

He shrugged, and she didn’t think he was going to answer.
But then, staring at the fire the way she’d done before, he murmured, “Not many.
We always had breakfast in bed on Christmas morning. Then we’d exchanged gifts
right there.”

“In bed? You didn’t even do it in front of the tree?”

“No. Our first Christmas, she was so excited that she
couldn’t wait until we’d gotten out of bed. So she pulled the present out of
the nightstand and thrust it at me.”

“What had she gotten you?”

“A pen. A really nice one. One I’d always wanted.”

“Oh. That sounds like a great gift.”

Her chest hurt. Lila and Daniel had loved each other so
much. She remembered when they first started dating when he was a senior in
college and Lila was a sophomore. Jessica well recalled that familiar sense of
certainty—the absolute knowledge, from the very beginning, that they would be
together forever.

She’d known it for sure. She’d seen their whole future
spilling out before then. He and Lila would fall in love, marry, have children,
spend their lives together. Love each other until they died.

That future was cut short, and she had a sudden slice of
guilt about feeling a little grateful about it, since it meant she could have
at least a little part of him now.

Nothing about Lila’s death was good, but, if she hadn’t
died, Jessica would never have known, loved, married Daniel.

The thoughts were too hard, too deep, for a winter evening
in front of the fire. She shook them off for another time.

To distract herself, she tossed a piece of caramel corn to
Bear, who’d be sitting with perfect posture in the hope that her good behavior
would prompt an edible reward.

Bear caught the kernel neatly in her mouth.

“You shouldn’t give that dog people-food.” Daniel must have,
like her, broken away from the poignancy of the moment before.

“A little caramel corn never hurt anyone.”

“It’s the principle.”

She was tempted to tell him she’d seen him give Bear a piece
of roast, but she managed to refrain—since he’d clearly done so in secret. She
tossed another piece which was also caught. “She’s very talented.”

“You’re making it easy on her by throwing it right at her
mouth.”

She frowned and tossed another piece, slightly misdirected.

Bear reached for it smartly and caught it.

Jessica gave Daniel a triumphant look.

“I’m not sure that was anything to be proud of.” He tossed a
piece, not anywhere close to the dog.

Bear jumped up and lunged, grabbing it just after it hit the
floor.

“She couldn’t possibly have caught that one! You have to
make it achievable!”

“Fine.” He tossed again, this one just slightly closer.

Bear hurried to snatch up the popcorn and didn’t care at all
that she hadn’t caught it.

“You’re making her miss on purpose.”

He was about to toss another piece—this one no doubt far
afield too—but Jessica reached over and grabbed his wrist before he did.

They had a little wrestling match over the piece of popcorn,
broken only by Daniel saving the bowl of popcorn before it spilt and Jessica
moving her laptop to the coffee table before it fell to the floor.

He’d clenched his hand over the piece, but she used both of
hers to try to pry his fingers open. They were both laughing now, and she was
draped on top of them, but she wasn’t about to give up.

He was stronger than her, though, and she couldn’t make his
fingers budge.

She groaned in frustration and made like she was going to
give up.

When he relaxed slightly, she tickled him under the arm.

He huffed in surprise, and his fist loosened.

She clawed the popcorn out of his palm, in the process
disintegrating it completely.

“I got it!” she declared, holding up a tiny piece as a
victory prize. “I win! I—”

Her gloating was broken off abruptly when he grabbed her and
pushed her back onto the couch, using his weight to hold her in place. “You did
not fight fair.”

“It was perfectly fair. You’re just a sore loser.” Her voice
wasn’t as authoritative as she’d been trying for. In fact, it was a little shaky.

She was suddenly conscious of his strength and heat and hot
brown eyes as he gazed down on her. His skin was slightly damp, and his lower
body was pressing into hers.

Her heart hammered wildly when he lowered his face to kiss
her.

His mouth was gentle at first, almost sweet, his tongue
gently teasing her lips. Then he nudged inside her mouth and started to stroke,
and she moaned deep in her throat as her body responded.

Her blood pulsed as she fisted her hands in his shirt,
meeting his tongue with her own.

They’d never kissed like this before outside of the bedroom.
Before, it had always been in the dark.

The difference didn’t matter, though. She responded as she
always did, desperately eager for more.

She arched her neck and gasped loudly as his mouth lowered
to that spot on her neck that felt so good. “Daniel.”

He grunted a response, his hands starting to move busily
over her body. They slipped under her sweatshirt and tank until they touched
her bare skin.

She shivered as he pushed the fabric up to bare her breasts.
Then she pressed up into his hands, making a silly breathless squeak as he
thumbed her nipples.

He’d been staring hungrily down at her body but now he
glanced up at her face. “What was that sound?”

“What sound?”

“That squeak.”

“I didn’t hear a squeak.”

He thumbed her nipples again, and she made the same little
squeak at the resulting jolt of pleasure.

He grinned down at her, obviously very pleased with himself.
“
That
sound.”

“It wasn’t a squeak. I was just breathing.”

“I know a squeak when I hear one.” He used the pads of his
thumbs to rub circles on her tightened nipples, and she bit her lip to hold
back the sound this time.

But he kept it up, and it felt so good, and she couldn’t
help but arch up and release a ragged sigh.

“Beautiful,” he murmured. “I love that you’re so
responsive.”

She adored the possessive sound of his voice, but she
couldn’t respond with words until he released her breasts and slid his hands
down to her hips.

“What’s to love about that?” she asked, glad to hear at
least a tiny bit of irony in her tone.

He grabbed the waistband of her pants. “It makes me feel all
manly.”

“It’s not about you, so don’t get a big head about it.”

He raised his eyebrows sky-high.

She gasped. “You know what I meant!”

He laughed as he leaned down to kiss her again. “Yes, I know
what you meant.”

He evidently changed his mind about her waistband and
instead moved his hands back up to her breasts as he kissed her. He fondled her
until she was squirming and had wrapped one leg around his hip, trying to get
friction where she needed it.

Their mouths parted for long enough for him to pull her tops
over her head, but then he kissed her again. The fire against her bare skin
burned, blazed, branded her.

His lips trailed down her neck again, this time descending
to her collarbone. “So beautiful,” he murmured. “You’re so beautiful, Jessica.
I can’t seem to get enough of you.”

Her heart swelled in pleasure at the words. Then at the
sensations as his mouth moved over her breasts, teasing for a minute before
they lowered to her belly.

She cried out when he reached up to caress her breasts as he
kissed little lines over her abdomen.

The ache between her legs intensified until she couldn’t
stand it. “Please, Daniel. Please. I need… I need…”

She writhed beneath his attentions.

He knew what she needed, however inarticulate she was. He
pulled down her pants and panties together and dropped them over the side of
the couch.

Then he stared down at her completely naked body.

She’d never bared herself like this to anyone in a completely
lit room. He could see all of her, and his eyes raked over her body, settling
over the juncture of her thighs.

Then his eyes blazed, and his head lowered, and his mouth
nuzzled her intimately.

She clutched at his head as he explored with his tongue and
lips, fisting her hands in his hair.

When he found her clit, he sucked on it until she was crying
out loudly and her whole body shook through an intense orgasm.

“Oh, wow, oh, wow, oh wow,” she mumbled when he finally
raised his head.

He smiled, clearly proud of himself as he wiped his mouth
with the back of his hand.

She gazed up at him. He looked so strong and sweet and dryly
amused and everything she’d ever wanted.

She grabbed him and pulled him down into a kiss.

He responded eagerly, just as passionate as her. He worked
on his pants, and she worked on his shirt until he was naked too.

She couldn’t help but reach out for his erection, stroking
it gently with her fingers.

His breath hitched and then hitched again as she caressed
him.

She wondered if he’d felt the same pleased pride she did
when he’d pleased her.

He let her explore for a minute or so, but then he moved her
hands away and eased her onto her back on the couch.

She reached up to grab the armrest above her head and hold
on as he slid himself inside her.

His thrusts were fast and steady, and they felt increasingly
good—tight and full and intimate.

She panted as he rocked into her, and she fisted her fingers
into the leather, her whole body shaking with his motion.

He paused to wrap her legs around his hips, and she locked
her ankles and tightened her thighs on each of his thrusts.

“Oh, yeah, oh, yeah,” she gasped, when the penetration
shifted inside her. “So good.”

She’d never felt like this before, like pressure inside her
was coiling, even deeper than her orgasms before.

“How is it?” He was sweating and huffing with effort, but
pleasure twisted on his face.

When she could focus enough to look in his eyes, she saw
their expression was strangely primal, dominant.

“So good. Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.” She was
practically begging now as the pleasure kept spiraling through her. She was
slammed with waves of heat from the fire and so much more.

“I won’t stop. That’s right, Jessica. That’s right. That’s
so good. You’re almost there.”

His voice was another caress. She started to make
embarrassing sobbing noises, and her hands flew up to claw at his shoulders as
the tension finally broke.

Her release was too loud. Her whole body seemed to come
undone. Then she heard him make a loud, extended guttural sound as he jerked a
few last times into her clenching body.

His climax was obviously just as powerful as hers. He
collapsed on top of her.

Her throat hurt. And it was so hot. And so incredibly good.

“That was… That was…” She couldn’t begin to complete the
sentence.

“Yeah.”

She hugged him, unable to not convey the wash of affection
and connection she was flooded with. He hugged her back.

After a minute, she said, “I can’t believe we did it on the
couch.”

“At least it wasn’t on the floor. That can lead to
uncomfortable side effects.”