Meadow Perkins, Trusty Sidekick (5 page)

A few people from my class waved at me and/or looked surprised. I waved back and attempted to look casual. In the living room, Jack stopped in the middle of a throng of people. I landed in the only empty space, a little behind him. My dropped to about a two out of ten as I observed the throngs of people crammed into every square inch of available space.

Right next to me, a couple of drunk girls giggled and wobbled in their platforms. My sister had a point about drunk girls not being cute. However, they appeared to be having fun. More fun than me anyway.

A sudden intense longing for a friend came over me. I glanced around for Isla. My heart sunk when I scanned the crowd and saw no sign of Isla’s blond curls nor Alejandro’s black ones. Though I had no way of knowing if they were together. I glared at a houseplant, trying to whether or not I should crawl into it and die.

Okay, self. Let’s try the fun part again. Take 45. Action.

The band broke sound barriers. All around me, kids danced.
Dancing? Ugh. No. Maybe a light sway.

The light sway felt awkward so I settled on a subtle nod. I scrunched my eyebrows in an attempt to look serious.
I am seriously into music,
my expression hopefully announced. Depending on the moment, I felt alternately too old and too young to be in the room. 

The band crashed on. Each member had on black skinny jeans with their hair in their eyes.
Mom would have an opinion on that. Stop thinking about Mom! OMG.

I shook my hair out of my face and tried to loosen up. Without noticing, I’d started moving. The warm fuzzies made their way to my head.

Jack’s shoulder brushed against me and he glanced behind him. I let my mouth curve into a smile. He moved over and I moved up next to him.   

I wondered how guys in bands learned the guitar playing dance.
Sip, sip, sip
. Although I was feeling what maybe could be considered tipsy, I was not going to reach the level that the girls next to me were on. And how could they dance like that and not die of embarrassment?   

Jack turned and held up his empty beer cup and shook it. “Want to get another?”

“Yeah.” I nodded, with the goal of looking fun and cool. I took stock of my situation as I followed him back to the kitchen.

Things weren’t half bad. I looked pretty cute. My hair had been cooperative all evening. Isla had chosen a completely ratty pair of jeans and old Converse sneakers to pair with a delicate lace tank top that I’d never even worn before, but she’d found in the back of my closet. I definitely wouldn’t have worn ratty jeans with it but it worked.

Jack was super cute from behind too. He might have been better looking from the back actually. I smiled into my cup. The beer made me brazen, if only in my own thoughts. 

It took forever to get from one room into the room next to it. Yikes. 

Jack apparently decided that we should have another conversation. “So what do you think of the band?”

I bit my lip and considered the question. “I like them. Very loud. Lots of feedback.” I didn’t love the band. But just in case his brother was in the band, I went for a positive answer. 

Jack laughed. “They’re okay.”

“Yeah. Maybe they should watch some YouTube videos of Mick Jagger in his younger days.” In case I wasn’t clear, I added, “Because their moves look kind of jerky . . .”

Jack actually laughed.

My cup magically filled up. I had to pee, but the thought of finding a bathroom was daunting. I decided to hold it as long as humanly possible. Twist had related to me that one should wait as long as they can when drinking alcohol for recreation before they pee because once one pees one will keep having to pee. We reached the kitchen.

Jack turned to me with an expectant smile. Like he was waiting for an answer. He was.

“I’m sorry. What?”

“Who was that girl you came with?” he repeated.

Ugh. Really? I’d been making an effort to be hilarious and he was only interested in Isla? My face fell. I felt it go. I finished the rest of my beer in one gulp instead of answering his question. “Beer me, please.” I thought I’d heard that on TV before. It was sad that I had to consult the television database in my brain to think of something to say to a fellow teenager at a party.

Jack shrugged as he took my cup. I remembered to wonder where Alejandro was. I hadn’t seen him in ages and I thought maybe possibly I was sort of supposed to be here with him. Or not. Who knew? 

That yucky lonely feeling arrived as tension in my shoulders. I hate that feeling. All my friends who were barely my friends had abandoned me.

The party raged around me. A tall redhead spiraled out right in front of me. She stood in front of the kitchen sink talking to two other girls who looked exactly like her and were dressed exactly like her. Tears poured down her face along with her eye makeup while her friends tried to comfort her.

“I can’t believe he would cheat on me with
her
!”

Her friend stumbled as she put her arm around her. “He is an asshole. They’re all assholes!”

“Here you go.” Jack startled me when he materialized in front of me holding my beer.

I smiled up at him. “Thanks.”
He’s so tall. If I’m charming enough, maybe he’ll forget about her. Maybe.
Why, this beer is positively delicious.

“No problem.” He gave me a once-over. My face went hot. “Tell me about yourself.” He ran his hand through his hair.

“There’s not much to tell.” The beer made me coy. “I’ll be 17 soon. I go to school. I think math was made up to torture people and I’m great at knitting.” All true thing and I managed not to bring up my cat, even if he is the cutest cat on the block. I poked him in the arm. “Now it’s your turn.”  

“I’m 17, too. I play guitar. I’m in a band but not the one that is playing. I have a really fat cat.” My heart swelled. I quickly assembled a fantasy that included us growing old together with our beloved fat cats.

“I also have a fat cat. Hank,” I said, glad I had spent some time practicing my cute, quirky nerd girl in the mirror.
Thank you goddess I’m not the girl crying by the sink.

The band stopped playing and the kitchen bulged with people heading for refills. Isla appeared next to me as if by magic.

“Meadow! Where have you been?” She acted like she hadn’t wandered off with a boy immediately upon arrival. 

“I’ve been around.” I glanced nervously at Jack, who’d been taken hostage by a short guy in glasses. He gesticulating wildly while he told a story. 

“Isn’t this fun?” Isla wiggled her hips to the music someone had turned on between sets. 

“Yeah, I’m having a pretty good time.”  

“He’s cute.” She nodded toward Jack and pursed her lips in approval.  

A guy from HSA, the very popular Cameron, sidled up to Isla and wrapped his arm around her. She leaned into him.

“Looks like you made a friend!”

Isla giggled. Eyeliner was smudged in her eyes in that drunk, but sultry, way.

I bobbed my head to the music. The beer added a little hip action as well. That summery happy feeling rushed through me.
So this is what it feels like.

“Hey.” Jack was beside me again. He reached his hand out to Isla. “I’m Jack.” He had to shout to be heard over the noise. 

She shook his hand. “Isla.”

Jack stepped back and stood close to me.

Isla stepped on my foot and pressed lightly while raising her eyebrow in approval. 

We decided to head outside like the other million people in the kitchen apparently decided to do at the same time. Isla immediately curled up in the last available lawn chair with Cameron.

Jack and I stood facing each other crammed up against the stone wall beside the pool. I sincerely hoped that I didn’t fall in somehow. I felt a little concerned that if I drank anymore, I would be out of control, so I put my beer down on top of the wall.  

I spied Alejandro staring at me over Jack’s shoulder. I waved awkwardly. Jack turned to see who I was looking at.

“You and Alejandro know each other?” he asked.

“Yeah, for a very long time.”  

“That’s cool.” He paused. “I guess that makes sense. You are friends with Emilia, right?”

“Uh, yeah . . . kinda.” I didn’t feel like explaining. I did feel a little weird that he mentioned Emilia. I had kind of forgotten about her.

I felt my phone buzz. I checked it. Mom.
I’ll be home late. Love you. Be safe.
It was funny how she’d been super involved when Twist was a teenager. Twist had been kind of wild. Mom was always around, trying to get Twist to stick to curfew and participate in family activities. I guess with me, she’d never had anything to worry about.   

I texted her back.
Okay. Love you too.

I stuck my phone back in my pocket. Someone shoved by Jack and he crashed into me. I looked up at him and he smiled showing off his straight, white teeth. I blushed and had a mini freak-out, but the beer was making this stuff a little easier. Plus, dimples.  Maybe this night hadn’t turned out exactly as planned, and it was very uncharacteristic of me to veer from a plan, but this wasn’t exactly a tragedy. A tiny part of me was worried that Alejandro saw. I reminded myself that Alejandro had a girlfriend and she was supposedly my friend for the 400
th
time.   

Shouting coming from inside the house broke the spell. The owner of the house had parents who’d come home early from Aruba or somewhere. Based on their stormy faces and the shouting, they weren’t interested in entertaining the hoard of teenagers that spilled out of every corner of their house. 

Jack grabbed my hand and led me through the crowd of people trying to leave. Redheaded drunk girl from the kitchen passed us, still crying. She and all of her friends were poster girls for “drunkest people at the party.” The only adult male present was trying to usher people out of the door all while yelling things like “grounded for life” and “taking away the car.” Isla and what’s-his-name were ahead of us while Alejandro waited on the sidewalk out front when we finally overflowed from the house with about fifty other people. 

Jack grabbed his phone from his back pocket. “Hey, my ride is leaving. I gotta run. Can I have your number?” 

In my head, I jumped up and down. In reality, I just said “yes.” He handed me his phone and I typed my number in.

He took his phone back and hit ‘send.’ “There, now you have my number too.”

I stood on the sidewalk, stunned. Isla came slung her arm around my shoulder. Her arms were so long they were like a normal person’s legs. “Girl, he’s cute and you are amazing,” she whispered in my ear and led me back toward where Alejandro waited with his hands stuffed in his pockets.

“Ready?” he asked brightly. It seemed a little forced.

“Sure.” I gave him a big smile. “We’d better get out of here before that dude’s parents ground us too.” 

We walked home, silent. I was tired and confused. Alejandro had a girlfriend, a fact that no one but me seemed to remember. Why did he invite two random girls to a party if he had a girlfriend? I may not have any experience having a boyfriend, but I kind of thought that I wouldn’t be okay with that if it were my boyfriend. I still couldn’t figure out where Isla fit into things. Maybe none of us fit into anything at all.

When we got close to our street, Isla broke the silence. “That was really fun.”  

“We should do it again sometime,” Alejandro said.

I saw my house in the distance. The porch light glowed in the darkness. No other lights were on meaning Mom wasn’t home yet. I checked my phone. One a.m.

“Well, I better get home.” Alejandro awkwardly patted my arm and high-fived Isla. 

“Bye,” I said.

We stood in the middle of the street and watched him walk back the way we came. He would then walk west for a few blocks and he’d be home. Waving slightly as he turned the corner, Alejandro disappeared behind someone’s shrubbery.

I turned to Isla. “Thanks for everything.”

She yawned. “My pleasure. Goodnight.” Her smile was genuine. For the first time since she came back, she didn’t seem like the coolest girl in school but just a regular person. It was nice to see. 

We didn’t make a plan. I knew I’d see her soon. I walked toward my house and dug my key out of my pocket. I let myself in, shut the door behind me, and headed to my room where I drank an entire bottle of water. Twist always said that if you drank a ton of water before you went to bed, you wouldn’t be hung over in the morning. I took an Advil for good measure and lay in bed staring at the ceiling thinking about Alejandro . . . and Jack.

Chapter 5

My ringing phone woke me up the next morning. I answered it yawning.  

“Hi Twist,” I answered. “I’m fine.” 

“Good! I knew you would be. Did you have fun at least?” she asked.

“Yeah, I think so.” My lips curled into a smile. I did have fun. It was kind of nice to drink totally yucky beer and talk to cute boys. It was the opposite of my usual weekend nights. Usually, I popped popcorn and watched the Kardashians. Something felt different, though.
I
felt different.

“Listen, is it your weekend with Dad?” It warmed my heart that Twist called my dad “Dad” too. 

“No, next weekend. He had to work a bunch this weekend.” I held the phone between my ear and my shoulder and reached for the water on my nightstand.

“Okay. I just want to make sure he remembers the show. Will you remind him? And maybe write it on his calendar?”

“Yes. I’ll remind him and write it on his calendar.”

“So tell me everything!” Twist demanded.

I gave her a vague description of the evening. I didn’t want to make a big deal out of the phone number thing in case I never heard from Jack again. I like to keep my expectations low so I don’t get disappointed. But I did tell her about Alejandro.  

“Who do you think he likes?” I asked her.

“Wait, doesn’t he have a girlfriend?” Twist asked. I could practically see her face scrunch.

“Yes.” I didn’t offer any more information than that.

“Doesn’t that mean he’s taken?” she asked. 

“Yes, but she wasn’t there. Maybe he’s gonna break up with her!” I exclaimed.

“Really, Meadow? You’ve watched enough television to know that isn’t true. Don’t you remember on
Gilmore Girls
when Dean was married to that girl and he and Rory slept together?”

My heart sunk. “I see your point, I guess. But no one is married in this situation.”

“He might as well be. Emilia is terrifying.”

“You still haven’t answered the question, and no one is cheating with anyone so forget about Dean and Rory and help me out here.” Sometimes I had to be firm with her.

“Fine,” she huffed. “Alejandro is still with Emilia, but Emilia sucks.”

“I already know all that,” I interrupted.

“Let me speak. Alejandro is intrigued by you because you got really hot—”

“
What
?” I interrupted again.

“Well, it’s true!” she exclaimed.

“No, it isn’t,” I argued.

“Uh, yeah it is, dummy.”

“Explain!” I demanded.

“Well, yeah! I mean look at you! You grew about four inches last year and you have those huge boobs. You look like Christina Hendricks only with Zooey Deschanel hair and brown eyes. And you haven’t even noticed!” 

I got out of bed and looked in the mirror. I saw a kind of big butt and super-smudged eye makeup. “I don’t know.” I turned to the side and sucked in my stomach.

“Just trust me,” Twist said.

I groaned. “I need coffee.”

“I’m coming by later, okay?”

“K.”

We both hung up without saying goodbye.

Later, while Twist was there, Isla appeared at the door. They hit it off immediately, of course. Isla surprised her by knowing a lot about art. 

We stood in the kitchen eating chia seeds. I didn’t even know what they were. They tasted weird.

“You should for sure come to my opening,” Twist invited Isla. I wasn’t sure why that bothered me. 

“Yeah, that sounds great.” Isla beamed.  

I chewed my nails and checked my phone every five seconds while they talked. I silently willed someone to text me. I didn’t know who I would have been more excited to hear from.

I turned to social media to stalk Alejandro. The first thing to pop up was Emilia, of course. She’d posted a bunch of new headshots she’d had done. I dropped my phone on the table in frustration.

As soon as the phone hit the table, it dinged. I jumped and so did Twist and Isla.  

My heart jumped into my throat. “I’m afraid.” I handed my phone to Isla.

“Ooh,” she breathed out. “It’s . . .”

“Who?” squeaked Twist.

“ALEJANDRO.”

I was truly surprised. I was expecting my mom before I was expecting that.

Isla handed me the phone with wide eyes. 

What’s shakin?
I read the text out loud.

Twist laughed. “You guys, I’m so glad I’m not 17. I gotta go.” She gathered her things and kissed me on the forehead. “Isla, come to the opening?”

“Yeah, I’ll come.” Isla smiled at Twist. It was a real smile. One of the first actual sober smiles I’d seen. Isla keeps a lot hidden.

“Keep me updated on the boy situation.” Twist let herself out the front door.

Isla turned to look at me. “Well?” she asked me with her eyebrows raised. “What
is
shakin’?” 

“I don’t even know how to respond to that.” I stared at the screen. 

“Come on! He wouldn’t be texting you if he didn’t want to talk to you,” Isla pointed out. “But he has a girlfriend. So . . .”

“I know, and I don’t know,” I said. 

“Well, say
something
.” Isla stood up and walked over to the windows looking out over the pool. “I’m going outside. Text him back. And then come swim.”

I sat at the table and watched her let herself outside. Isla reappeared by the pool and flopped on a chair. She was skinny and beautiful and something in me was whispering things like
Why isn’t Alejandro texting
her
?
Is
he texting her
? I shook it off determined not to let the mean voice in my head win. 

After much deliberation, I finally typed
Not much. You?
and hit ‘send.’ 

Almost immediately, and before I had time to panic, he replied,
It was nice seeing u. Want to chill?

A beam of sunlight shone down on me and I had to grip the table to stay attached to the chair. I made myself wait five seconds before typing,
Yes.

Tonight?

Okay. When/where
? I waited, tapping my foot so hard the table shook.

Ur house? 8?

See you then.
I stood up and skipped outside to join Isla at the pool.

When I joined Isla at the pool, I started to tell her but something stopped me.

“Well?” She squinted up at me, her hand shading her eyes.

“He just said he had fun and we should all hang out again sometime.” I cleared my throat and busied myself with my towel so she couldn’t tell I was a lying liar.

“Sounds fun.” She jumped into the pool.

At dinnertime, Isla headed home and Mom whooshed in for a bit and then rushed back out shouting something about work and the gallery and getting home late. I couldn’t help but notice that she had been MIA a lot more. What was mom not telling me? I didn’t have time to worry about it. 

I stared at myself the mirror. What was it Twist had said? She said I’d gotten hot. I could sort of see that a little if I squinted really hard while being extremely optimistic.

I changed into cutoff shorts and a floaty shirt with a cardigan. I didn’t want to look like I was trying too hard as that could be sliding into a gray area. My palms were slick with sweat and my head was so full of Alejandro that I kept wandering into rooms and then forgetting why I was there.

I’d been crazy about Alejandro for a long time and it had never occurred to me that I would ever be alone anywhere with him, especially alone in my own home with no parents in sight.

“Am I qualified for this?” I asked my reflection. A month ago, I was sitting alone in the cafeteria reading a book and being invisible behind Emilia’s shadow, and now I was waiting for a boy to come over.

I left my hair down. Isla had lectured me about leaving it down. She said it was fine up but perfect down and that I should always, always wear it down. Based on her amazing hair, I considered her an expert. The effect of her long, beachy hair was not lost on me or anyone else.

At 7:45, I hovered near the foyer. I didn’t want to be too close to the front door. I held my phone and anxiously stared at the clock while I paced around the house, finally settling on the kitchen floor. I fiddled with my necklace, a small, gold disc with a ‘M’ etched in it hanging on a gold chain. I chewed my fingernails and peeled polish off of my toenails. 7:51. 

I sighed and stood up. I put on water for tea just for something to do. At 8, the water boiled and the doorbell rang at the exact same time. I freaked out and ran to the door while the kettle whistled with urgency.

When I opened the door, Alejandro stood there with his black curls and skinny jeans.

“Hi.” I resisted the urge to lean against the door frame and just gaze at him.

“Hi.” He grinned.

“Come in. Want some tea?” I asked as though there was a teenage boy on earth interested in drinking herbal tea with me.

I was completely surprised when he said, “Sure.” 

“Follow me.”

I rescued the hysterical kettle and turned to the cabinet for mugs. Alejandro leaned against the sink. He didn’t look nearly as uncomfortable as I felt. 

“My mom has a million kinds of tea.” I plunked the mugs on the counter and opened the cabinet that housed my mother’s enormous tea collection. Painfully aware of how close we stood, I gave him the grand tour of the tea cabinet. “This tea is from Paris and tastes like roses. You can only get it at a special tea shop somewhere in Le Marais. There is even a tea museum there.” I rambled on about tea, powerless to stop myself. “Or any of them are fine. I won’t go into the origins of every single option.” 

Laughing, Alejandro reached out and took the tin of fancy rose tea. “I’ve never had Parisian tea.”

I couldn’t really believe I was making tea for a teenage boy. I dug through a drawer and came up with two tea strainers.

The whole thing seemed a bit senior citizeny. I hoped I would be able to keep myself from showing him photos of the cat while we drank it.

“As far as teas go, this one is pretty good.” I situated the strainers in the mugs and poured the boiling water through with shaky hands. They got shakier when I realized I’d never been completely alone with Alejandro which reminded me that I was usually with Emilia when I was around him. I stopped myself from saying, “How is Emilia?” Instead, I handed him a mug.

“Want to sit by the pool?” I asked.

“Yeah, by the pool is good. Fancy tea by the pool.” He followed me outside.

We stepped out into the chilly night and headed to the lounge chairs where I put my tea safely on the table and attempted to maneuver myself gracefully into my chair. After I sat down, I noticed how close the chairs were to each other. Isla and I had been reading the same Vogue earlier and moved the chairs right next to each other. Now, I sat mere inches from Alejandro.

“So what did you think of the band the other night?” he asked.

“I liked what I heard. I didn’t hear a ton, to be honest,” I said.

“Yeah. Andy got in tons of trouble.” He chuckled.

“His parents did look pretty pissed.” I fiddled with the stringy hem of my shorts. 

“I’m glad you came,” he said and sipped his tea.

I found that image so hilarious that I laughed.

“What’s so funny?” He blew into his mug in an attempt to cool down his Parisian rose tea.

“I think it is ridiculous that I offered you tea,” I said, shaking my head.

“No! I like it,” Alejandro insisted. “My mom drinks a lot of tea.”

“Everyone’s mom does,” I pointed out. “I’m more of a coffee person usually. But I don’t drink it at 8 p.m.”

“I do.”

The strands of light bulbs hanging around the pool swayed in the breeze and glistened off the blue/green water. Twilight fell, my favorite time of day and arguably the most romantic.  

Alejandro cleared his throat. “So do you know Jack from school?”

The mention of school made me clench my fists. “Oh, not really. I’ve seen him around, but I officially met him at the party.”

“You looked pretty cozy.” I looked at him, startled, and saw that he was joking. I felt my cheeks heat.

“Not really.” I had no idea what to say.

He elbowed me. “Meadow, I’m just kidding.” 

“Oh,” was all I could think of to say. He left his elbow touching mine. 

“Your house is great.” He stared out over the pool and in the back windows.

“My granddad built it.”

“I didn’t know that.”

I settled back into my chair. I told him about the sleeping loft and the skylights, and how each bedroom was like its own little suite and no one had to share a bathroom.

We sat for a long time, talking occasionally, sipping on tea that had grown cold. I shivered but didn’t want to move. Getting up might break the spell. The spot on my elbow that touched his burned up.

“Are you cold?” he asked finally.

“Yes.” I laughed. “It’s unusually cold tonight.”

“Want to go in?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I called upon all my powers of balance to get up from the lounge chair, a skill that requires incredible coordination and should be an Olympic sport. I did okay. I didn’t flip it over and fall off the back so I counted it as a triumph.

“We can watch something on Netflix,” I suggested. “We’ll have to watch the laptop in my room.” The only TV was in Mom’s room, which was a total waste because all she ever watched was MSNBC.

“Sounds good.”