Meant To Be (17 page)

“
I was afraid of this. I told you that one day you’d move on, and I wouldn’t like it.”

She sat silently staring at him in disbelief, and then spoke up with frustration evident, “I hate to break it to you, but I’ve already moved on with my life, and I don’t need a man to do so. God, are you really this self absorbed, yourself? It’s none of your business who I meet, or decide to date. Hell, I haven’t even met the guy and already you assume I’m going to end up with him.”

“
He’d be crazy to let you get away. That’s all. When things happened with Alex, and you first told me your visions, they were correct, but I was in denial thinking it was kind of crazy.” He chuckled quietly. “Then when I tested you, you told me I was having a daughter, going far enough as to tell me her name, and you were right again. You are one of a kind Jenna. Smart, beautiful and sexy as hell, so ya, I think this guy will be into you and I’m heartbroken.”

“Join the club,” she snapped. If anyone knew heartbreak it was her, and Tyler was the source of it.

“I deserved that,” he whispered, trying to smile again. “I know this is something you probably don’t want to hear, but I have to get it off my chest before it’s too late. I still love you unconditionally and know that no one else will ever be to me, what you are. I screwed up royally and have been paying for it ever since. If there was one chance that I could be with you again, I swear I would spend the rest of my life making things up to you. I know you know this, because I’ve tried telling you so many times before. I guess I just hoped that one day you would change your mind, and we’d be together again. We did have several good years together.”

She couldn’t believe what she was hearing, certain that she’d made things clear before. Obviously she’d been mistaken. Just about ready to blow up at him, she had to think carefully before speaking. He tried to take advantage of her vulnerability again. Leaning forward, he pressed himself against her. Nipping at her bottom lip, his tongue forced its way inside her mouth as he slowly tried to topple her.

“Tyler, stop,” she yelled, shoving him to the floor. “I can’t believe you. You want to talk about hurting, how about we talk about the countless times you slept with another woman while we were married? The countless times you lied to my face. The times were you ditched your son and me to be with her. The times you disrespected me enough to do those things in my house, or the fact that you moved in with her the first chance you got. The fact that she’s pregnant with your child right now and the list goes on.” She was completely disgusted. “It’s never going to work, and I just can’t do it anymore so I need you to stop trying. I mean, my God, I hope now more than ever that you’re right. I hope I find him or someone else to love, who knows, and then maybe you can get just a glimpse of the pain that I suffered because of your actions. You have no idea, do you?”

“
You’re right,” he whispered, looking hurt. He took a step in her direction, and she just couldn’t do it anymore. She moved further away from him. “I can’t, Tyler. I just can’t love you that way anymore. It hurts too much,” she whispered, wanting to cry.

She made a dash for the stairs, leaving him there. Tyler was fine when he thought she was alone. As soon as the idea of someone else came to mind, he turned on the head games. It wasn’t fair, and she was sick of it, hoping that she’d finally made things clear once and for all.

She sighed, reaching the party again. Holding back the anger she felt, she tried her best to be happy and sociable like nothing had happened.

Tyler wasn’t such a good sport. Within the hour he gave some poor excuse, apologizing that he wasn’t feeling well.

Jayden barely noticed them leave.

Chapter Fifteen

Life, it was so unfair sometimes. Jenna had to excuse herself for a minute. Tyler looked like a wounded dog in the brief time before his departure, and it upset her. She needed a distraction, so she hid in the kitchen, trying not to be too obvious in her distress.

Sam followed. “What happened?”

Busying herself with the dishes, Jenna decided to give her the short version. “Tyler overheard us. Long story short, he didn’t like it.”

Sam laughed.

“It’s not funny. He got really upset, almost panicked for once, and he wanted me to take him back, practically begged me to, again.” She sighed. “He said that he counted on me changing my mind one day and hoped that I’d reconcile with him. I just get so angry, because he makes me feel horrible, and I shouldn’t have to feel that way anymore. It’s like I’m being tortured over and over because he decided that I wasn’t enough for him. It’s so unfair.”

“I always thought that you and Tyler were meant for each other. I was obviously delusional. You deserve better, Jenna. Don’t forget that.”

“
I’m sorry,” Jenna sniffed. “I thought the same thing once. Obviously, we were both delusional. I’m trying to let go, but it’s so hard to just turn off the love I had for all of those years. I wish I could just snap my fingers and
poof
, it would be gone. I guess that’s what makes this all so hard.” She tried an unsuccessful attempt at smiling. “Damn, Tyler. Just when I finally think that things are getting better, he does something like this and sucks me back in.”

Sam became curious. “The asshole, so what did you tell him?”

“
I yelled at him and pushed him to the ground after he tried to kiss me. Then I reminded him of all the hurtful things he did to me and to Jayden. Finally, I told him I hoped I did meet someone else so he could taste a little of the pain that I had to endure, and that I couldn’t love him like I used to anymore, because it hurt too much.”

Giving Jenna a hug, Sam leaned back to look at her again. “I’m proud of you,” she whispered.

“Hurry up summer.” Jenna laughed while wiping her tears away. “Thanks, Sam.”

“That a girl.” Sam smiled, and Jenna giggled. “I can’t wait to get there. Thanks for such a wonderful gift. ”

It was Sam’s turn to laugh. “Anytime, Jenna.” Putting an arm around Jenna’s shoulders, they walked out of the kitchen to join the others.

Jayden’s birthday party was filled with so many emotions that Jenna was completely drained by the end of the day. He was absolutely spoiled rotten, and she agreed to let him sleep in her bed that night. He requested to watch a movie after she’d told him his bedtime story, and she couldn’t deny him on his birthday.

Time had flown by and her baby was already five. Sighing as she closed the door, she went downstairs to spend some time with her visiting parents.

They were on the couch watching some boring nature show when out of the blue her mother spoke. “I hope you know that we’re proud of you.”

“For what?”

“Well, for everything. Despite it all, everything that you’ve been through. The car accident, Tyler, taking care of Jayden as well as you do, and for the new career choice, making it on your own, and we’re proud of how you handled yourself today. Having Alex here and her being pregnant on top of it. You handled it all really well, and I just wanted you to know that we’re proud.”

“Thanks, I’m really trying.”

Thinking about Tyler and especially about Alex’s pregnancy was depressing, and although a little premature, she’d decided to tell them about Sam’s earlier surprise. “So Sam had a surprise for me today. It turns out that she’s going to Ireland this summer, and I’m thinking of going with her. Since Jayden usually has his yearly visit around that time with you guys, I was wondering if he could stay with you a week or two longer?”

“
Is Tyler okay with that?” her father asked, irritating Jenna.

“
It isn’t up to him,” she snapped, to make her father smile.

“
What I meant was Tyler might want some time with him too. You know how much I love having Jayden around. I just don’t want to cause any trouble.”

“
Tyler knows about the trip actually, and I guess I’ll figure that out closer to the time. Alex will have had the baby by then. Jayden really doesn’t like it there, and I guess I just wanted to make sure that I had an alternative, just in case I can’t depend on him.”

“Of course, honey, he can stay as long as you need him to.”

Her suitcase was packed, her parents had just picked up Jayden, and Sam stood at her bedroom door waiting.

“
Come on, Jenna. The taxi’s outside and if you take any longer we’ll miss our flight.”

Jenna laughed at her, finding it hard to contain her excitement as she rolled her suitcase along behind her. “Okay, I’m finally ready.” And she was, in more ways than one.

She smiled the whole way to the airport, anxious for some personal freedom, the point of it all.

“
Do you think this is crazy? I mean, I’ve never been away from Jayden for this long.”Jenna asked nervously, making Sam laugh as they made their way to check their luggage.

“
No, not crazy, Jenna, I’m just as excited. It’s an experience of a lifetime. Don’t back out on me now.”

Jenna laughed again. “Oh, I won’t Sam.”

“
Good,” Sam’s smile widened as she pulled Jenna along to board.

They were standing in the airport, and she could see herself with Sam, waiting to grab their luggage.

She watched herself, looking nervous as she talked to Sam, and then watched again as she turned around in the opposite direction to where Brady and another man suddenly stood, just staring.

She was in awe looking at it from a third perspective. Leave it to Sam, to set her up as soon as she stepped off of the plane. Then the vision was gone, and she was horrified, wanting more.

“Mommy, mommy wake up.” She could hear Jayden in the distance, his voice getting closer. She opened her eyes and smiled, hugging him tight. “I want breakfast,” he whined, and she laughed hearing his stomach growl.

Goodbye fantasy land, hello reality. It was time to wake up and enjoy her present company. It didn’t hurt that her trip was coming up and the dream helped enhance her excitement to go. Bringing along the enthusiasm to help her forget about the previous day’s stresses. It was going to be a long remaining winter and upcoming spring. Sighing she said, “All right, Monkey, let’s eat.”

* * * *

“So what’s going on?” Sam eyed her curiously, making Jenna laugh. Shrugging her shoulders, she continued to clean the breakfast dishes. “Okay, Jenna, spill it. You’re in an extremely good mood this morning. Not that it’s not nice to see, but usually after an argument with Tyler you’re not so chipper, even the next day.”

Jenna smiled, shaking her head. “I have to let go someday, Sam, and I’m tired of letting him get to me. My mood is partly to do with the wonderful dream I had and its possibilities.”

“Oh, yeah?” Sam smiled. “And there’s possibilities, huh? I like the sound of that. So what happened this time?”

Sam had always had an intense interest in Jenna’s dreams. Believing in them even when Jenna thought she was going crazy. “It was the summer, I guess. You were waiting for me at the door and were worried that we’d miss our flight. We were both very excited, and you gave me a pep talk about looking forward to seeing how everything turned out. We were back at the airport in Ireland. I was watching as you and I picked up our luggage. I looked nervous and then you turned me around, and there they were, staring. ”

“Who was staring? What?”

“Come on, Sam, keep up with me,” she teased. “Brady and Caleb were staring. I really hope you’re not going to try to set me up with him as soon as we land.” She eyed Sam cautiously before continuing. “It all went away after that anyway, and I woke up shortly after.” She shrugged.

Jenna laughed at Sam’s disappointed expression. “Man,” she mumbled, “You’re good.”

“Maybe more will come tonight; who knows.” And then the reality of it all came at her. “It’s really happening, isn’t it?” Jenna asked excitedly. “We’re really going?”