More Than One: A Novel (15 page)

“Okay, Jamie calm down. This isn't exactly the best time for us to be getting into it. Your best friend is over there blacking out. Don't you think we need to be here for him right now?”

“Yeah, but Ash is asleep and I want answers. If you are here on your mystery job to harm Ash, I will make your life a living hell. You get me? So I need to know what's going on and I want to know right now,” I said, fuming.

I was so angry. I could have punched something, preferably him. He was standing there thinking, trying to find the best lie possible to tell me, of course. I couldn't believe this. This was the man that I said I love you to and he said it to me. Why would this have to be the one I fall for?

“Look Jamie, you don't understand the severity of the situation. Things are really complicated and I don't want to stress you out any further,” he finally said.

“Why because you love me?”

“Yeah, it's...”

“That is such bullshit,” I screamed. “You say the situation is complicated, well break it down for me, help me understand. I'm tired of this back and forth from you and Ash and maybe even Rach. Tell me something now and it better be good.”

He grabbed my shoulders and shook me.

“You just don't get it. People's lives are at stake and you want me to tell you what's going on so you can be a part of that? Is that what you want? I'm not trying to betray you or Ash, that's not why I'm here.”

“Then why are you here? You can tell me that much, you at least owe me that,” I said calming down.

“Owe you? Why do I owe you?”

“Because you told me you love me and I said it back. I don't go around falling for people and not knowing anything about them. You told me I should trust you and you can't even tell me a little bit of what's going on. This doesn't make sense and it’s not fair.”

“Jamie, I would never hurt you or Ash. I'm here to protect him, that's all I can say and please don't make me go any further.”

“How do I know you're not lying?”

“Because despite what you think, I do love you. I love you enough to tell you what I'm doing here and if anyone finds out I told you... well, let's just say, no one needs to find that out.”

I let my guard down and peered into his eyes. They say the eyes don't lie. Well, how do you know when they are telling the truth? I wanted to believe him, but something still didn't sit right with me. What could I do though? No matter how I tried, I couldn't turn my feelings off. I did love him.

“Jay,” he interrupted my thoughts.

“Huh?”

“Are you still mad at me?”

“I don't know what to think. You say you're here to protect him, but from what? Is he in some kind of trouble?” I asked.

“He's not in any trouble on the level you're probably thinking, but I am here to keep an eye on him and make sure he's okay.”

“Does Ash know that? I mean, you don't like each other. Do you guys know each other?”

“No, Ash doesn't know any of this and I need you to please keep it that way. I know him, but he doesn't know me,” he said. “You have to promise me that you won't mention this to him or anyone else baby.”

He stooped down so that we were eye to eye and I couldn't look away. It took me back to when I first saw him at the Junction, sitting across the way looking at me. The way he mesmerized me with his eyes. This whole time he was here for Ash and I just made it easier for him to do his job, by dating him.

“Babe, promise me please,” he said.

“I promise, but I'll need something in return. I won't tell your secret, but you have to trust me more. Like you can tell me more about what's going on so I won't keep being suspicious of you.”

“Jamie, I can only tell you the things that I know won't put you in any danger. If you can't accept that for right now, then I'll have to pack my things and take Ash with me,” he said.

I looked over at Ash, still on the couch breathing slowly, looking peaceful. I didn't want to lose my friend, and an even bigger part of me didn't want to lose Michael.

“Jamie, can you accept that?”

“Yeah, I guess I can.”

He hugged me and kissed me on the forehead, like he always did. We walked over to the couch and stood there over Ash, watching him sleep. I checked his face and he was still warm, so Michael changed the towel. I was frozen there, wondering what he was dreaming about, and at the same time, wanting to know what Michael was thinking. Life was starting to get more complicated for me, just when I thought I was getting things back on track. This sucked.

“Hey, why don't you take Ash's bed for tonight? I know you don't want to leave him. I'll just hang out in here and keep an eye on him,” he said.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I know you're tired and he's knocked out. If anything happens, I'll come get you.”

“Okay, thanks.”

I leaned over and kissed Ash on the forehead and then went to the bedroom. Michael came in, kissed me again, then turned the lights out and closed the door halfway.

I still didn't have all the answers, but he was right, I was tired. Nothing was going to make sense to me tonight anyway. I closed my eyes and went to my safe haven, the ocean. I embraced the sun and the waves and fell into a deep sleep.

Chapter Fifteen

When I woke up, the smell of bacon, eggs and something sweet greeted me. That was a nice change from what I normally smelled in the morning. I got up, rubbed my eyes, and then stretched. Before I could get out of bed, Ash was coming in the room with a tray. He seemed better.

              “Morning Jay,” he said putting the tray of food down in front of me.

              “Morning. How are you feeling?” I asked.

              “Oh, yeah, about last night, I'm sorry. Lately I get into my narc spells and I can't control it,” he said.

              “Narc spells?”

              “Yeah, narcolepsy. I apologize that you had to see that. But thanks for looking after me,” he said.

              I didn't believe him, but I didn't want to push either.

              “Um, is Michael still here?”

              “Yeah, he's asleep on the couch. When exactly did he get here?”

              “Well, last night, when I got here. I just didn't know what to do and Rach wasn't answering her phone... then you told me I couldn't call an ambulance. It was so crazy, but Michael came and helped.”

              “Well, I guess that was lucky for me,” he said being sarcastic. “Oh and Rach has been calling all morning. You should call her and let her know what's going on, but please feel free to leave out all the drama.”

              “Yeah, okay sure.”

              “But first, eat up before your food gets cold. I'm not all that good a cook, but I tried just for you,” he said with that smile that I always loved. He grabbed a piece of bacon and bit it before walking into his bathroom.

              “Thanks for going through the trouble,” I said.

              I ate the breakfast, which wasn't half bad, then called Rach. I filled her in on some of what happened and let her know everything was okay.

              Ash came back out of the bathroom and he was fully dressed. I wondered how long he had been up. He walked around the room as if nothing happened last night. I couldn't wrap my head around it. I wanted to slap him and ask him what his problem was. I should just be happy that he was okay, but I couldn’t let it go.

              “So Ash, you were going to tell me something last night... do you remember what it was?” I asked.

              He stood in front of me, his face was blank. He scratched his head then sat down on the bed.

              “No, I don't. What did I say?”

              “You kept saying,
don't be mad at me
and
I'm so sorry
.”

              “Nothing comes to mind,” he said lying back on the bed. “Oh well, what do you have to do today?”

              “Why are you dismissing this? You had me scared last night and now you're acting like its nothing. How can you do that?” I said.

              “I'm sorry Jamie, but I hardly remember much from last night. If it comes back to me, you'll be the first to know.”

              I looked him over and knew he was lying. Everyone was keeping secrets these days. At least Michael was coming around a little.

              “Okay, I'll leave it alone, but I know there is something going on with you. All I can say is, I'm here for you and always will be.”

              “Thanks Jay... So, what are you doing today?”

              Before I could answer, Michael came around the corner and knocked on the door. The door was already halfway opened so he could easily peek his head in.

              “Hey you guys,” he said.

              “Morning,” I said.

              “Hey man. Thanks for last night. Jay said you came to the rescue... I appreciate it,” Ash said.

              “It was nothing. So, what smells so good?”

              “I cooked. Help yourself to anything in the kitchen,” Ash replied.

              “Okay, thanks. Jamie, how did you sleep?”

              “Are you kidding me? This bed is amazing,” I said pushing Ash on the shoulder.

              “That's good. I'll be in the kitchen. I'll let you guys finish talking,” Michael said.

              As soon as he was around the corner, Ash turned back to me. He scooted closer to me on the bed and put his head on my shoulder. I leaned my head on top of his and we just sat there in silence. What was I going to do with him?

              “So, hopefully when I ask this question again, this time you'll answer... what are you doing today?” he asked.

              “Oh, sorry. I'm staying here until I have to go to work. That's if you don't mind.”

              “Seriously? Of course I don't mind,” he said excitedly.

              “Okay, well, let me wash up and I'll be out in a minute.”

              “Cool, you know where your stuff is. I'll be in the living room with your boyfriend if you need me,” he said with a smirk.

              He left the room and I got up and went to his dresser. I used to stay over a lot, so I left some clothes here just in case we had a long night. Plus, Ash always stocked up on disposable toothbrushes just for Rach and me. We were the only ones allowed to stay the night. Well, unless he was dating someone.             

              After I took a shower and made myself look pretty, I went to the door and stopped. I heard Ash and Michael in a heated conversation. I didn't want to walk in on them, but I couldn't pull myself away from the door. Eavesdropping was becoming an addiction. I had to crack the door a little to hear better.

              “I know you like her and everything, but I was here first. I just want you to know that if you ever do anything to hurt her, I will tear you limb from limb,” Ash said.

“Look, I'm not trying to cause any trouble between you and Jay. I know that I can't undo years of friendship, but I'm here now and I do love her, so the sooner you deal with that, the better off we'll be,” Michael replied.

              “Yeah, whatever.”

              “Ash, seriously, what is your problem with me?”

              “My problem is, you came out of nowhere, and we don't know anything about you. Now, you're everywhere. I'm literally sick of seeing you. Then I don't get to see Jamie anymore because she is always with you,” Ash said.

              I know I should go out there and stop this madness, but I wanted to see how far the conversation went.

              “Please... cry me a river. Every time we’re together, its Ash this and Ash that. And when she's not talking about you, her mind is somewhere else. I don't know what else to do. I don't have her completely and I know that, but you have nothing to worry about. I'll be long gone before she ever decides to get rid of you,” Michael said.

              I felt horrible because I never knew it was like that. I know I talked about Ash a lot, but I talked about Rach, too. They are my best friends. And if this was a problem, why didn't he say anything? It seems like he was keeping more to himself than I imagined.

              They were still talking, but it was almost a whisper. I strained even further to try and catch as much of it as I could.

              “I do love her Ash, you may not believe that, but I do. So, for her sake I hope we can put this behind us and be friends or at least act like it.”

              “I have no problem with that, since it’s for her sake. She is already going through enough, I don't want to make it worse,” Ash said.

              I decided this would be the best time to crash the party, but I had to play it off, so I started making noise so they would know I was coming out.

              “There she is,” Ash said when I came around the corner.

              “Yeah, I'm glad I had some clothes over here. And by the way, the shower is still amazing,” I said.

              “I know,” he said.

              “Well, I'm going to get out of here, I need to go get changed and I know you guys want to talk,” Michael said walking towards me. “Call me later please.”

              “Okay. You should get some sleep while you're at it.”

              “I will,” he said and then leaned in and kissed my ear and whispered, “Remember your promise.”

              I just nodded my head and hugged him.

              “Alright Ash, I'll see you later. Thanks for breakfast,” he said shaking Ash's hand.

              “No problem.”

              Michael headed to the door and then turned back to me and winked before he disappeared into the hall. Ash turned to me and gestured for me to sit on the couch. He turned on the television and we snuggled. I knew he wasn't going to tell me anything so I didn't ask. I just let Ash be Ash and enjoyed the time we shared together.

              Later, back in my room, I fell onto my bed and was immediately out. In the dream, I was lying on a couch again crying. I heard the woman's voice trying to calm me down. She kept telling me to take deep breaths, but I was too upset to listen. I still couldn't see her face, my body wasn't tied down, but I was numb. I just looked at the ceiling as the tears ran down the side of my face into my ears.

I heard the same soothing music in the background getting louder and louder. It started to overpower her voice. I drowned everything out and tuned into the sound of my own heartbeat. My chest was tight as I tried to slow my breathing down.

In my peripheral, I could see the woman moving around. I wanted to turn and look at her, but my neck was stiff. I thought about moving my legs, my arms, but they lie there still. I gave up on my motor skills and started listening to my heartbeat again. The loud thud that pounded against my chest rang out in my head.

I screamed as loud as I could and then blacked out. When I woke up again I was in the laboratory room, strapped to the table. A masked man was standing over me holding a long needle. I looked at his eyes and they seemed so familiar to me. I couldn't place where I knew him from, but the familiarity made me calm. Another masked man came into my view and this one I didn't recognize. The beeping in the background started up. The first masked man looked at the other and he shied away from the table. The beeping slowed until it was steady.

The first man, with the eyes that were soft and friendly, rubbed my head before he stuck the needle in my neck. The pain shot all over my body and I started to spasm. The restraints were tight around my body, I could feel them burning into my skin every time I moved. The man was there massaging my neck in the area he stuck me. Once I localized the pain, I felt it burning. It felt like someone had branded me, and the pain was spreading.

I opened my mouth to scream, but my throat was dry, it hurt to use my vocal chords. The beeping sound got loud again and then there was pressure in my right arm and within seconds, my vision became blurry. The man was taking off his mask and I fought to keep my eyes open long enough to see who he was. My eyes were too heavy and all I could make out was the back of his head as he left the room.

When I opened my eyes, the television was still on and Rach was asleep. I got up and used the restroom, then grabbed a bottled water before getting back into bed. I pulled out my journal and started writing. The dreams didn't bother me much anymore. I was subconsciously taking Rach's advice about accepting things and moving on.

After I finished writing, I turned over and closed my eyes. I laid there feeling more peaceful than ever. I wasn't sure how soon it would be before I went back to sleep, but I knew I wasn't scared. The more I dreamed, the closer I got to putting things together. Then I would put an end to it and things would go back to normal. I fell asleep a little while later and the usual blackness was there.

I got up the next morning and decided since it was Sunday, I was going to relax in the bed under the covers for a while. Rach was gone and I assumed she was already somewhere with Derrick; they were inseparable these days and I guess I could understand why. She said she was in love.

I rolled over and grabbed my phone right when Ash started calling me.

“Hey Jamie, finally you're up,” he said sounding energetic. “I've been calling you all morning.”

“Yeah, I've been up, but I guess Rach put my phone on silent. What's up? Is everything alright?” I asked.

“Of course. I just wanted to get to you before your boyfriend did.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I know you don't have to work today because I asked Rach and I want us to hang out, just the two of us. I already have the day planned, all you have to do is say yes,” he said.

It had been a long time since the two of us hung out without some kind of drama going on. It would be nice to have some one on one time with Ash. I knew Michael would probably be upset, but he wouldn't tell me that.