My Misery Muse (5 page)

“She told me she tried to contact me.  Why didn’t you?”

“I did, I got the same she did, you were always not there, too busy.  When she decided to stop after the last phone call that left her in tears, I told her ok, she wanted to do it on her own; she didn’t want to screw things up for you.  What was I supposed to do, continue to watch her heart break more and more every day, watch the guilt of you not knowing rip her up, or help her get her life back together, Seth?”

I didn’t know what to say to that, so instead I took a drink of my black and tan letting the slightly sweet bass and the earthy Guinness fill my mouth.  I deserved to know, but what if what he said was true? What if it was hurting Dev? What if she did feel guilty?  Did it matter that I didn’t know before,
[V3]
 
it’s the past nothing could be done about it now. Now all I could do was get to know my son, make sure he and Devi were taken care of.

“So how is she doing now, how are they doing?” I asked.

He shrugged took another drink, “Her career is really taking off, the shop’s becoming one of the best in Dallas. She’s got herself a great rep going in the industry, a lot of that’s because of Cris.  He’s been there ya know, helping her, he took her on right out of art school.  He’d just opened the shop and took the risk on a young, female unknown in the business; she’s now one of his top artists.  As for Jaks and her, they do pretty well, she’s a great mom. Nothing like ours, she puts him first before everything.”

“I’m going to spend some time getting to know him while I am here, I want to know my son, help care for him, and make sure he has everything he needs.”

He finished off his ale, “Devi takes good care of him, they don’t need for anything. If you get involved Seth, make sure it’s for good, because if it’s not, this time I will find you and I will bloody you if you hurt them again.”  With that, he got up tossed some bills on the table and left.

I sat there finishing off my drink thinking about what he said. I wanted to get to know Jaks, I wanted a place in his, in their lives. I could care for them financially now, but what would that mean for my music career, how would a family fit into my life?  Knowing I had a lot to think about I got up, reached into my pocket and threw some cash on the table to head home and do some thinking.

The next morning I pulled into the parking lot behind the shop, I could already hear Pantera pounding away inside and knew Cris was inside, and not happy.  I decided to walk around the building and hit up Joe’s before I went in; my first appointment was still 45 minutes away.  I walked around  the store fronts and took a look around, mostly tourists this morning, such a typical morning for Lower Greenville.  How I love this area of Dallas, so rich in history with an eclectic vibe.  There is a mixture of pubs, bars, vintage clothing stores, cafés, restaurants—all one needs could be found here but mixed with a great atmosphere.  At night, it’s filled with partying college kids, artist types, punk kids all meshed together looking for a good time. Not too far from Deep Ellum in Dallas terms at least, so a lot of people out partying start in one place and end up in the other or vice versa. I walked into the café and waited in line to get my latte for the morning, thinking about my phone call with Mags last night. Seth and I do need to clear the air before we can make this work, with that decision made I called Drake.

“Hey bro,” I said when he answered his cell.

“Hey Dev, what are you up to?” he asked.

“Nothing much getting coffee before my first appointment, I need a favor though.”

“Ok, whatcha need?” he said, he never turned me down on a favor.

“Well, uhm, Seth showed up yesterday, and before you say anything, yes he knows about Jaks. And I think he and I need some time for us to talk, I know how you feel, but this isn’t about you or even me it’s about Jaks,” I was babbling, which is my norm when talking to my brother about something he’s not going like, if I don’t, he doesn’t let me finish. “So could you watch Jaks for the night? I know it’s a Friday night and this is short notice so if you can’t I will figure something else out.”

“I know he’s back, I talked to him last night. And yea, I agree you two need to talk, I was going to go out with the guys tonight but I can skip it to hang out with Jaks. Do you want him to crash here or me to stay at your place?”

I knew what my brother was getting at, did I want an empty house tonight? Honestly I didn’t know, I mean he left, and yes, I did encourage him to go, but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to get involved with him again, even if it was just for sex.  On the other hand, it had been 3 years since the last time I had sex and my body has always been pulled to Seth like a moth to flame. Seth had been my first and at this point, only lover.

“Dev you there?” he asked after waiting too long for a response.

“Hmm, oh yea, take Jaks to your place. I’m not sure where were going to talk yet, and if it’s at my place I don’t want you eavesdropping or pounding on him.”

“Hey, I didn’t hit him last night,” he muttered, “though I wanted to, and why didn’t you tell me he was in town?”

“I didn’t get a chance to, he showed up at the shop and then we went back to my place,” I said. “Where did you see him?”

“He called me and said we needed to talk, so we met up at London and talked.”

“Ut-oh, and neither one of you walked off with a black eye, must have been hard on you,” I joked. “So what did he want?”

“He wanted to know why I didn’t call him about Jaks. I told him I did, we did, not our fault he doesn’t answer his phone or check his email himself.”

“Yea I know,” I muttered. “So could you come by the shop around 8 to get Jaks?”

“I could just pick him up from school Dev, that way he’s not running taz-style through the shop.”

“I know, but Seth is picking him up from school, and then coming back to the shop to hang out with him. Don’t start, he wants to get to know his son and you and I both know I can’t tell him no on this. He deserves to get to know Jaks.”

“Yea I know, I just don’t have to like it. Ok I will be there at 8, love you sis,” he said and hung up before I could respond in typical Drake fashion, when he decides a conversation is over, it’s over.

“Yea love you too bro,” I muttered to a dial tone.

I picked up my latte from the barista and headed next door to face off with Cris. This is going to be a long god damn day.

I pasted on a smile and opened the door to the shop; Cris was setting up his station and ignored me when I entered.

“Hey Cris,” I said in greeting.

He grunted; ok guess it’s going to be one of those days. I followed suit and ignored him going to my station and getting everything set up for my first appointment at 11:15.  My first client came and went with Cris still ignoring me. I know him well enough not to try and talk to him before he’s ready, because he just won’t talk.

I was breaking down after my previous client when Cris walked up to me with his arms folded over his chest, looking everywhere but me. Ut-oh, this is going to piss me off and he knows it.

“Did you sleep with him?” he barked.

I spun and glared at him, he had the decency to flinch and look ashamed.

“Not that it’s any of your business Crispin, but no I didn’t sleep with Seth. We went home, ate dinner, put Jaks down and talked.”  Since I was pissed I decided to throw this in instead of doing it like I had first decided. “Seth’s picking Jaks up from school then coming back to the shop to hang out in the office while I finish work.”

“You didn’t think you should run that by me since it is my shop, first?” he growled.

“No, it’s never mattered before, so why now?” I knew why, but I will not be cow towed by him for doing the right thing.

“It matters now, especially when it’s Seth. He left you Dev, he didn’t have the decency to answer his god damn phone when you called; he had his girlfriend do his dirty work for him instead of being a man and taking care of his responsibilities.”

“I am not listening to this Cris, I made mistakes too. But it’s not about me it’s about Jaks, he deserves the chance to have his father in his life” I said.

“I asked you to marry me, Dev, I love you, I love Jaks. I know you don’t love me yet, but you could, if you would just let go of him and move on, we could be happy Dev,” he pleaded.

“This has nothing to do with that Cris, and I already told you I haven’t decided anything with that yet, don’t push me on it,” I said. “Now if you would please excuse me, my next client should be here in 5 minutes, I need to get things cleaned up and prepped.”  I spun away and headed to the back room to get the equipment I needed.

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I walked into the shop and instantly saw Dev bent over her work, not noticing anything else.  I walked over and looked at the piece she was working on; it was breathtaking. A full back piece of wings that started out as angel wings but slowly turned into intricate scroll work that wrapped around the girl’s ribs and the outer breasts. 

“Damn, that’s sweet,” I said in slight awe, but then again I was always amazed by Devi’s work.

The girl looked up and grinned, “She’s fucking fantastic at what she does.”

Dev looked up then barely acknowledging me while she dipped into ink and went back to work.

“How many sittings till it’s done?” I asked.

“This is 2 of 3 and I can’t wait until it’s finished,” the girl said then went back to lying down and zoning out at the endorphin rush getting a tattoo gives.

“So Devi, I need your keys and directions,” I said.

Across the room Cris harrumphed but continued to ignore me.

“One sec Seth,” she said. “Ok, hey Cin I’ll be right back, need anything while I’m gone, drink of water or something?”

The girl just shook her head.

With that we walked up to the back and Devi dug through her bag pulling out keys and directions.

“Here ya go Seth, uhm also do you have any plans tonight?” she asked.

I noticed Cris had stopped his gun, which made me even more curious about what’s going on between them. I hadn’t noticed anything on Devi’s part, but Cris has always had a thing for her.

“No not really, I was thinking about going out with the guys tonight, but nothing I can’t get out of,” I said, if she would rather me hang with her, I would drop them in a heartbeat.

“Uhm, well I was wondering if you wanted to get together and talk, just the 2 of us? I already called Drake and he’s going to get Jaks around 8 tonight and babysit for the night,” she said looking nervous as hell and chewing on her bottom lip.  Damn, I forgot about how she used to do that when nervous, and how big of a turn on it had always been.

I had to clear my throat before talking, “Uhm yea, we can do that, any thoughts on where you want to go?”

“We can go to the café if you want, grab some dinner and coffee. It’ll still be early so the party crowd won’t be there yet.”

“Yea, sounds good. Ok I am going to head out and get Jaks,” I said. “See you in a few.”

I walked out feeling a bit better about being able to get Devi back, I needed a game plan, but first I needed to find out what was on her mind.

I was standing at the counter scheduling Cin for her final sitting when I glanced out the window; Seth was walking up with carrying a giggling Jaks.  Damn, that man was gorgeous, all 6 feet 2 inches of muscle that rippled while he walked, I looked back at Cin who was smirking at me.

“So that’s Seth, huh?” said Cin.

“Yea, that’s Seth.”

“Damn he’s fine, Dev.”

“Yea trust me, I know,” I muttered.

With that Cin left throwing me a look over her shoulder that said ‘don’t be stupid’ as she walked out the door.

Seth walked in with a smiling Jaks hung over his shoulder.

“Mama,” Jaks wailed then wiggled to be put down.

Seth put him down then Jaks instantly leapt at me wanting to be picked up.  I scooped my son up and gave him kisses all over his face.

“Daddy get me,” Jaks told me.