My Runaway Heart (31 page)

Lindsay jumped at the agonized cry that burst from
Jared's throat, watching, stricken, as he picked up the brandy glass and hurled
it at the wall. Then, as if that pistol ball had seared into
his
own
brain, he sank to his knees and clutched his lowered head. Tears
burned Lindsay's eyes to see such torment. Dear God, how could any one man have
been made to suffer so much?

"I swore then . . . I swore that I would do
anything I could to destroy England, her trade, her ships . . . for the years,
the
years
when I could do nothing to
help Elise . . . for Dag, for my parents. And someday I will find them . . . I
will find Sylvia and Ryland Potter . . ."

He said no more, but his voice had shaken with such
hatred that Lindsay shuddered, imagining his retribution against the two who
had destroyed his family. His life. She had already seen the fiery devastation
wrought again and again by the Phoenix. Devastation she feared, a terrible lump
growing in her throat, and a burning need for vengeance that for this man might
never end . . .

"Leave me, Lindsay. Go."

Tears slipping down her cheeks, she knew suddenly what
she risked if she stayed, her love, her heart, her very soul, just as she knew
that her decision had already been made.

She could not leave him. She would not. Quietly, she
went and sank down on her knees in front of him. He lifted his head, his gaze so
ravaged it stilled her breath.

"Woman, you must leave . . ."

She silenced him with trembling fingers pressed to his
lips, slowly shaking her head. "No, Jared, this time you will not send me
away. I will stay."

He stared at her for the longest moment, as if not daring
to believe the import of her words. Lindsay waited, hoping, fearing, praying .
. .

His hand reaching up to grasp her fingers made fresh
tears burn her eyes, but when he upturned her palm and placed a fervent kiss
upon the tender flesh, a ragged sigh tore from her that matched his. Her breath
gone, time had fled with it, Lindsay aware of nothing more than Jared as he
rose and drew her with him, pulling her fiercely into his arms.

Then his lips captured hers and she was lost, lost to
the power and desperate hunger of his kiss as a searing need so intense filled
every part of her that she felt her knees give way. But she didn't fall, for
she was swept so suddenly from her feet that she gasped while the room seemed
to whirl around her, only to still itself when she found herself gently
deposited upon the four-poster bed.

Yet Jared didn't join her. Instead he stood there
looking down at her, the tension in his powerful body, the turbulence in his
eyes telling her even now he might deny her, even now he was thinking to
protect her.

Everything Jared Giles had done had been to spare her
from harm. She knew that now. Just as she knew she wanted to drown in the
blazing torment only he could inflict, to drown and never again come up for
air. With trembling fingers, she reached up and touched his hand.

"Jared . . .
please
. . ."

Her whisper driving straight into his heart, Jared
could hold
himself
back no longer. All he could see
was light, Lindsay's hair, her yellow gown, her skin, against the icy darkness threatening
to overwhelm him, threatening to steal even this bright moment from him. All he
craved was the warmth of her, the heat of her, as he buried himself in her
welcoming arms and blanketed her with his body.

Just as he wanted to bury himself that very moment in
the wondrous softness of her body, to chase away all the howling demons
tormenting his soul. But he could not, would not, humbled as much by the
priceless gift she was giving him as by the love he'd seen shining in her
beautiful eyes.

His throat tightening, he lowered his lips to hers, so
warm and sweet, so innocent, trembling with desire and perhaps the slightest
hint of virginal fear. If only for tonight, he would bring her no harm, and as
for the rest, with supreme effort Jared shut the looming reality of the future
from his mind. Lifting his head, he stared down at her, his gut clenching with
emotion so fierce for this woman even as he sought to soothe her with gentle
teasing.

"Hmm, a pity about your new gown."

"A pity?"

With her voice trembling, too, her soft breasts rising
and falling against his bare chest the most beguiling torture, it was all Jared
could do to hold himself still atop her and not think too much yet of that
aching part of him pressed against the sweet juncture of her thighs.

"Yes, that it has no buttons like one of my
shirts. But I suppose there are other ways around . . ." His voice so
hoarse he couldn't finish, he straddled her legs and began to ease the pale
yellow muslin over her creamy thighs, over her hips, his lower body aching all
the more at the sheer loveliness of her.

While Lindsay could scarcely breathe as Jared undressed
her, his hands skimming her flesh so lightly that she wasn't sure if it was her
clothing or his palms sweeping like a whisper over her. Within a moment the
gown was gone, slipped over her
head
and tossed to the
edge of the bed, followed soon by her chemise . . . and then she felt the full
seductive weight of his hands upon her; Lindsay moaned deep in her throat when
he lingered to cup and squeeze her breasts by turns.

But not long, dear Lord, not long enough, as he moved
to slip her satin drawers from her body. An instant later she truly trembled,
lying naked beneath him while his eyes seemed as intensely blue as she'd ever
seen them in the lamp's golden glow.

Her heart thundering, she watched his hands move to the
towel slung low around his waist, and then that covering, too, was gone. He
loomed, powerfully muscled and naked, above her; the part of him which she'd
glimpsed a short while ago taking on new and startling proportions.

"I'll not harm you, Lindsay, I promise," he
whispered huskily, all trace of teasing in his voice gone as he bent over her,
his mouth nuzzling at her breast. "
Not tonight . . . not
in this . . . I'll not harm you."

She had no chance to wonder at his words, his lips
seizing upon a swollen, aching nipple making her cry out, his tongue swirling
around and
around
and then flicking at her with a
mastery of equal parts torment and sweet ecstasy. Her fingers funneling into
his burnished hair, still damp from his bath, she closed her eyes, never
dreaming, never knowing, such pleasure could exist. But she flared them open in
surprise when she felt Jared's fingers enmesh in her woman's curls, then slip
into her body and tease a secret, hidden place that already throbbed and
tingled.

"Jared . . ."

"
Shhh
, Lindsay,
shhh
." His lips molded to hers, his tongue delved
wildly into her mouth and she surrendered to the passion of his kiss just as
she gave herself over to the sensual agony of his fingers slowly circling her.
Circling and venturing ever deeper only to slide out again until she felt wet
and flushed and utterly weak with desire.

Her hands fluttering to his stomach, she splayed her
fingers against his taut, masculine flesh, the impassioned recesses of her mind
overtaken by an instinctive yearning to touch him, too. And she did touch him,
her palm grazing something silken and hard,
her
fingers closing around him even as Jared started and groaned raggedly against
her mouth.

"Woman . . . no, enough!"

She did not heed him, would not allow
herself
to, sensing as he groaned again, like a dawning upon
her as old as time, the potential of her feminine power to please him. And she
wanted to please him so desperately, her hand slipping lower. Crisp, springy
curls entangled around her fingers, his flesh grown even harder and throbbing
against her palm

"Damnation, woman, will you be the end of me?"

His voice thick and hoarse, Jared dragged her arms
above her head so suddenly that Lindsay gasped, a mounting wildness in him now
as he clasped her wrists with one hand and caressed her body with the other,
his touch first teasing, then almost fierce until she writhed and squirmed and
moaned beneath him. Again his mouth found a hardened nipple and he suckled
ravenously, only to trail a brazen path to the other breast, back and forth
until she was panting and whimpering, her body shaking just as he
shook,
their desire a raging tempest more frenzied than any
storm.

She felt him part her legs with his knee and of her own
accord she widened them for him, opening herself for him, not knowing
why
but sensing the timeless answer when his full weight
settled upon her and a hard ridge of flesh swelled at the aching heart of her
thighs. She heard him whisper her name, heard him whisper he might cause her
pain, but only for an instant, and then he thrust himself inside her, so deeply
that she cried out . . . tears stinging her eyes not because he had hurt her,
but because at last, finally, she felt whole.

"Lindsay, I'm sorry. Forgive me . . ." he
said raggedly against her ear.

She threw her arms around his neck to reassure him; she
caressed the ravaged flesh on his back and powerful shoulders as he sank again
and again into her body, his breathing coming harder, faster. She rose to meet
him, lifting
herself
to him, craving more of him, all
of him, her throat constricting and tears streaming down her face as she held
with all her might onto the man she loved.

Just as Jared held onto her, the terrible darkness
gone, blazing light overwhelming him as he shuddered and spilled himself into
the wet, engulfing heat of her body, clutching Lindsay to his heart as she
moaned wildly and found her climax beneath him.

Long moments later, he still held her, caressing the
damp hair away from her tear-stained face, a wave of such fierce possession
gripping him that he doubted he could ever let her go.

And when she finally opened her eyes and snuggled
against him, his body growing hard and urgent for her once more, he told
himself that at least for this one precious night, he would pretend that they
would never be apart.

Chapter 28

"Lindsay, are you awake?"

Jared's low query thrilling her, Lindsay didn't move,
didn't flutter an eyelash, wanting simply to lie there for another glorious
moment and listen to his steady heartbeat against her ear and the sounds of the
wharf coming to life outside their window.

She had never known such contentment. She felt utterly,
completely, his from head to toe, every inch of her body caressed by him, kissed
by him, in ways she could never have imagined between man and woman. And the
last time, when he had taken her from behind, his hands moving wildly over her
body as if he couldn't touch enough of her at once, she had never known such a
sense of consummate possession. Even now it made her cheeks flare hot to think .
. .

"Woman, I know you're awake. Unless you're
blushing in your sleep, which isn't likely."

She couldn't help smiling, nuzzling closer to him even
as he rolled her gently onto her back and brought
himself
above her, staring into her eyes. She stared back as he smiled, too; she was so
filled with love for this man, so filled with hope for their future. Surely now
things would work out between them, they had to—

"Don't you think it's time we dressed? I'm sure my
men are wondering . . ."

Jared didn't finish the thought, but he hadn't needed
to. Lindsay blushed even hotter, although she shook her head, winding her arms
around his neck.

"No, I don't want to get dressed. Not yet, Jared."

"Not yet?"

She shivered at the way he looked at her, shivered even
more when he shifted his full weight upon her, his smile gone now, intense heat
burning in his eyes. She drew in her breath sharply when she felt the hardness
of his flesh nudge her softness, her thighs opening to him unbidden as Jared
lifted himself slightly and then sank easily into her, her body already wet and
eager for him.

As he thrust deeper, yet so slowly she thought she
might scream for wanting him fully inside her, he dragged her arms from around
his neck and enmeshed his fingers with hers, pushing her hands into the pillow.
And still he stared at her as he possessed her, his eyes never leaving hers,
not even when his breathing grew unsteady and his lean hips thrust ever faster
against hers.

She felt her sudden climax coming upon her like a
cresting wave pulling her under deep water, felt Jared grow rigid just as she
did, her breath gone,
her
gaze held captive by his,
until they were both lost to the sweet agony of their bodies throbbing together,
finding release together.

And still he watched her as if he wanted to see, wanted
to know fully, the effect of his possession upon her, his eyes as intent as she'd
ever seen them. As if he wanted to burn upon his brain the sight of her
surrendering to the ecstasy they brought each other. Lindsay finally closed her
eyes, the aching, heart-stopping sensations simply too much.

When she finally opened her eyes, Jared had become
quiet except for his flesh still throbbing inside her, and she wondered as
wanton heat raced to her toes if he might be growing ready for her again. She
knew she would never know enough of him, never feel sated, and a slow smile
came over his face as if he'd read her mind. Yet it held a strange hint of
sadness, too, and she felt a niggling of unease.

"Jared? What is it?"

"Nothing. Just that the morning has come. It's
time you and I were dressed."

He withdrew from her and then was gone from the bed,
Lindsay never having felt
so
bereft as she watched him
retrieve his breeches from a chair near the tub. He was so magnificent to look
upon, so beautiful, that her throat became tight, her breasts, her body still
yearning for him. She blushed hotly at her brazenness, but she left the bed and
ran to him just as he turned to fasten his breeches.