No Direction Home (Sweet Home Colorado) (11 page)

The ringing of the phone pulled Grace away from the window
. “Hello.”  

“Hi, honey, it’s me
. I wanted to let you know Jamie and I will be staying with my friend, Ida, in town tonight. The roads are too bad to try to make it home.”

“Thank goodness you’re okay
. I was starting to worry.”  She continued to look out the window at the blowing white stuff. The snow was getting deeper in the driveway.

“I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to worry you
. Honey, when your friends arrive, have them stay over. We were at the restaurant and I heard a semi jackknifed on Wilson Hill. And with the white out conditions, the roads will be blocked for hours.”         

“I don’t think they’ll try to come with the weather like this
. How was the movie?”

“Jamie loved it
. We had a good time.”

“I’m glad
. She’s a sweetheart. We had fun today, too.”  It was easy to let herself get close to Seth’s child.

“I knew you would
. Remember what I said.”

“If they show up, I’ll do it
. Ollie and I will be fine. I’m going to curl up in front of the fire with a good book.”

“Okay, well, we’ll see you after church
. If you need anything you can call me here at Ida’s or call one of the boys in the bunkhouse. The numbers are on the bulletin board next to the phone in the kitchen.”

“Okay
. Goodnight, Nana.”  The chiming of the clock in the hallway made her jump as she hung up the phone. She wasn’t used to being in the house alone.

A half hour later, glancing out the huge picture window, Grace could see headlights moving in the distance
. Surely Cindy and Jenna hadn’t tried to brave the snowstorm.

She watched them pull into the driveway
. Ice crystals hung from the headlights on Cindy’s red Jeep Cherokee. Good grief, they had come.

“Hurry, come inside.
”  Grace held the door open for Cindy and Jenna as they ran through the snowstorm toward the house.

“I can’t believe you came through white out conditions to see me
. You guys must be crazy.”  She laughed when she hung their coats in the closet.

“Actually, I never dreamed it was this nasty out
. It became worse after we left.”  Cindy held a bottle of wine in each hand. “Spring storms always move in fast.”  She shrugged. “I had my cell phone and knew if we ran into a ditch I could call you and you’d send some big strong cowboy to rescue us.”  She smiled. “Really, I didn’t have a clue it would get this bad.”

Jenna
stood there, looking frozen.

“Come over to the fire and warm up
. I’ll fix some hot tea.”  Grace led her to a chair beside the fireplace.

“Okay, I need to take the chill off.
”  Jenna sat and nodded toward Ollie. “He has the right idea for a night like this.”  Ollie lay curled in Nana’s recliner, snoozing, while the wind howled around the corner of the house.

“Where is everyone?
”  Cindy checked out the place, following Grace to the kitchen. “I thought everyone would be here with the weather this bad.”

“Well girls, we have the place to ourselves
. Seth had to leave on family business last night and because of the bad weather, Nana and Jamie are spending the night in town.”  She grinned. “Nana told me if you made it here you had to spend the night. Some truck jackknifed on Wilson Hill and the road is closed.”  She laughed. “Looks like you’re trapped here with me and the cat.”

Cindy giggled
. "Ooh...I like the sound of that. I haven’t been snowed in for a long time. We have wine. You have food. We’ll have a party and you guys will have to tell me all your deepest darkest secrets.”

“You’re full of it.
”  Grace sat the bottles down on the counter and started the water boiling for the tea. “We’ll have these later.”

Jenna
held her hands out to the warmth coming from the fireplace. “Sounds like fun.”

“Sure, it’ll be good for us to catch up and this will give you a chance to get to know Grace
. I always tell my customers you really don’t know a person until you’ve spent the night with them.”

Jenna
smiled when Grace came in carrying a tray with the tea pot, cups and another plate filled with cookies, cheese and crackers. “Well, if we get bored, there’s always TV and
Saturday Night Live
.”  She set the tray on the coffee table and handed Jenna a cup of hot apple cinnamon tea.

“Thanks, this cup feels great to my frozen fingers
. I don’t know how I got this cold just coming from the car to the door. Cindy’s car was warm.”

“It’s a damp, wet, spring snow
. The kind that freezes you to the bone.”  Grace shivered when she remembered a time she got stuck in a snowstorm and Papa had to come and pull her out of a ditch. “I’m glad you made it here safely.”  She handed Cindy a cup of tea, poured one for herself and sat down on the comfortable sofa beside her. The wind continued to blow around the back of the house, making a howling sound.

Jenna
sipped her drink and glanced at Grace. “Today, I spoke to a friend of mine who knows an editor in New York. I told her what we were talking about last night. She seems to think there’s a need for a book about chronic pain and if you’re interested she’d like to see a proposal from you.”

“Really.
”  It touched her that Jenna would talk to someone on her behalf. "Thanks for thinking of me. I don’t know if I could write it, but I do know there’s a need for it.”  She gazed into the fire knowing this was another omen. The universe was telling her to write the book. She was living with chronic pain, surely she could write about it.

“I’m only going to say this one more time and then I’ll drop it.
”  Cindy narrowed her eyes and glanced at Grace. “The rest is up to you. You’ve always had a way with words and if anyone has a story to tell, it’s you.”  She kicked off her shoes and tugged a mauve throw around her feet on the sofa and continued. “The Arachnoiditis took your independence, your husband, and career. You fought it and took back your life. That’s a story people with pain of this magnitude need to read. You said yourself you couldn’t find anything except negative stuff about it. You can write a positive book about how you were able to get yourself together. People need to know.” 

Jenna
nodded. “Cindy’s right. People need to hear your story.” 

Grace sat up, ready to confide in her friends
. “I feel like you two are ganging up on me, but you have a point. Last night I was thinking about what you said. I’ve always wanted to write and never had time. Now, time is all I have, and I want to do something important. This might be it.”

“I know you can do it,
” Cindy exclaimed. “I don’t think you could do anything more important. You told me many people who are diagnosed with this pain commit suicide. If you are able to reach one person, that’s saving a life. That’s huge.”

Cindy was right
. If she could save a life it would be worth it. And it would do her good to write about it and work through her problems this way. Maybe then she could move on and have a complete life.

Jenna
leaned forward eagerly. “Do you have any idea how you would put it together?” 

“Sort of
, I started writing a personal journal right after I was diagnosed. I did it for therapy. I was thinking I could combine it with what I learned in the rehabilitation center to let other people know there's help for people who have to live with this kind of pain.” 

“I think you might have something there.
”  Jenna glanced from Grace to Cindy with a warning look. “But, you have to be realistic. Go into this with your eyes wide open. Books of this type are usually published in hardcover, which increases the likelihood for review attention and library distribution.”  She stopped to consider, then continued. “To get the kind of exposure you need, it’s usually written by some kind of famous person or endorsed by heavy hitting doctors. However, I think it’s a wonderful idea and it’s worth a try.”

Grace knew doctors
—lots of them—and was sure she could get their endorsements. All she had to do was ask them after she had the book written. Maybe her friends were right. She could do this.

Cindy nodded
. “I know what you’re saying. Grace is basically a nobody with pain, but I bet there are a lot of nobodies out there with pain who would like to read her book.” 

“Exactly, and that’s why I think you should go for it.
”  Jenna held her tea cup up in a toast to Grace. “Good luck with this project and if there’s anything I can do to help you, let me know.” 

Cindy joined in as they
clinked their cups together. “To Grace. You can do it. It’s a story that needs to be told.”  She’d do it. With nothing to lose and lots to gain...why not? Now, she had a purpose. “Thanks ladies.”  The phone rang, interrupting her. “Excuse me. It’s probably Nana checking to see if you made it here.”

Laughing, she answered the phone
. “Nana, the girls made it here safe and sound.”  She could feel the blood drain from her face when she recognized the voice on the other end.

Chapter Ten

“It’s not Nana.
”  Lee’s irritating voice grated on Grace’s nerves. He was the last person on earth that she wanted to hear from. “How are you, Grace?”

“Fine.
”  With a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, she turned toward the girls for moral support. “Lee. What do you want?”  The harsh tone of her voice made Cindy and Jenna stop chattering. They sat watching her.

“Can’t we have a civil conversation?
”  Lee’s voice was courteous, but patronizing. “That’s the least you could do for me, after all I’ve done for you.”

What did he do for her
? What? Cheat on her with another woman. Abandon her in a nursing home? The man was a pig. She clenched her fist until her knuckles turned white and her nails cut into the palm of her hand. “Why are you calling?”  Since she had been home, she had tried to put the hurt and pain he'd caused behind her. She thought she had succeeded. Now it came rushing back, like a steam roller, suffocating her.

“The house went under contract today
,” he said. They need your signature.”  She could hear the murmuring of another voice in the background. He was with someone.

She took a deep breath
. “Have them overnight the papers to the ranch or send an e-contract.”  She bit her lip. “I’m not coming there.”

“I didn’t expect you to.
”  She heard hesitation in his voice and he covered the phone and spoke to someone. “Ah, Grace, there’s something else.”

Her heart beat a steady rhythm
. What did he want now? Her last shred of dignity? “Everything was settled before I left town. Get to the point.”

“Okay
. It’s something I need to tell you.”  Grace could hear him covering the receiver and muffled whispering to whoever was with him again.

“What do I possibly need to know
? Nothing in LA concerns me anymore.”  She held the phone tightly in her hand. “The only thing we have in common is the house and you’ve told me about that.”  She sighed. “Look, I’m busy. Either spit it out or hang up.” 

“Don’t get on your high horse
. Calm down.”  How many times had she heard that? She rolled her eyes and listened to him drone on. “You’ve only been back on the ranch a short time and you already sound like a hick from the sticks.”

“I don’t give a damn what you think.
”  She bit her lip, trying to keep her temper in check.

“Fine
. I was going to be nice about this, but forget it. Laura and I are going to have a baby.”

Lee and Laura are having a baby
. Grace’s heart dropped to the floor as if she had been punched in the stomach. This was the man who hadn't had time when she had begged him for years to have children. One more lie—now he was having a child with
that
woman. She swallowed and took a deep breath, covering the receiver to regain her composure. She’d never let him know how much he had hurt her. “Congratulations.” 
Deadbeat asshole.

She gripped the side of the sofa and sat down next to Cindy
. The ache in her heart tightened her chest making it hard to breathe. “I hope you’re both very happy,"—she lied. Not long ago, they had shattered her dreams. Somehow, she mustered her strength to finish the conversation. “Send the papers. I’ll sign and get them right back.”  A silent tear trickled down her cheek. Cindy handed her a tissue. She dabbed at the corner of her eye and wanted this conversation to be over with.

“Aren’t you interested on how we did on the sale?
”

“I don’t care
about the sale.”  Her heart turned to ice, chilling her to the bone. She wished she could shove the receiver from Colorado to LA, all the way up his skinny, slimy butt.

“We made a cool five hundred grand each after expenses
. Not bad. Your share will be deposited by wire into your account at closing on the 30th. By the way, they loved the flower garden you grew out back.” 

Unable to control her emotions, salty tears formed in the corners of her eyes at the mention of her garden
. It had taken years to get the garden just right. She had put her sweat equity into the home while Lee partied. She didn’t miss Lee and his meanness, but she missed her flowers and her home.

“Fine
. Good luck, Lee,” she snapped. Her hands were shaking when she hung up the phone. Cindy moved to her side and gave her a hug.

“I thought I was over him.
”  She pressed the tissue against her eyes. “They’re having a baby.”  She sniffled. “Do you know how much I wanted to have a baby.”  Tears streamed down her cheeks. “I’m such a fool.”

“No, you’re not,
” Cindy insisted and handed her another tissue. “You have a right to cry. The man is a prick and he hurt you. It’s okay to let it out.” 

"I don't miss Lee or the Hollywood scene, but I do miss the idea of having my own home and children."

"You can still have your own home, children and another flower garden."  Cindy patted Grace on the shoulder and glanced over at Jenna. “Go get that wine, hon. I think we could use it. We have some demons to expel.”

Grace swallowed a sob and hugged Cindy
. “What would I do without you?”

“Don’t know, but you’ll never have to find out.
”  She hugged Grace back in a death grip. “Men may come and go, but true friends like us are together for life, through the good and the bad.”

Jenna
came back carrying a bottle and glasses. “Let’s drink and forget about men for awhile. Sometimes they're a pain in the rear.”

“Yeah, but what would we do without them?
”  Cindy popped the cork on the bottle. “Grace and I just happened to find two losers. Now, take you, Jenna. I know you like Charlie. And he likes you. He’s one of the good guys. We just have to let him figure out it’s time to settle down.”

Jenna
gasped. “Am I that obvious?”  She avoided their gazes and blushed to the roots of her dark auburn hair.

“No, it’s just you’re my friends
. I know you both—quite well.”  Cindy smiled. “He always watches you and you always watch him. When he enters the room you get all fluttery. Those are the symptoms of love. You’re both infected.”

Grace smiled through her tears and chugged her glass of wine and poured another
. “Love.”  She sighed. “Is there such a thing as true love?”  

“Of course, there’s true love
. Look at your grandparents. They were lucky enough to have the real thing.”  Cindy sighed. “We’ve been looking in the wrong places and at the wrong guys.”  

“Well, I don’t need the anguish
. I’m done with men.”  Grace sniffed and kept drinking.

“Grace Sanders, you’re full of it
. I know you have a thing for Seth and I think he feels the same about you.”

She stared at Cindy, glass in midair
. “Why do you say such things? I’ve only known the man for a short time.”  She wasn’t sure of anything about Seth. How could Cindy know? She snorted into her tissue, blowing her nose. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

      “Yes, I do
. I’ve been your friend since I crawled across the sand pit at the park to meet you. I know what makes you tick.”  She hugged Grace, and then moved away. “You know I care about you.”

“
Yes, and the feelings are mutual.”  She stared into her old friend’s eyes. “You’re the best.” 

“Oh, Grace, I’d like to know what the Hollywood parties you went to were like,” Jenna interjected and watched them closely.

Grace glanced at her in surprise
. She had forgotten Jenna was still with them and felt grateful for the abrupt change of subject. She didn’t want the evening to turn into a crying jag and tried to smile. “Hollywood parties. Well, let me see. It depended on who was having it.”  She dabbed at her nose with the Kleenex. “You could dress casual or to the nines.”  She stared vacantly into space with memories running rampant. “Actually, I still have some of the dresses I wore to the more elaborate affairs that don’t fit me anymore. They are about your size. Would you like to try them on?”

“Would I?
”  Jenna beamed in delight. “That’d be fabulous.”

“Come along
. They’re in my closet.”  Grace grabbed the bottle of wine and headed up the stairs with Jenna and Cindy following behind her.

“Take what you want
. Since I’ve gained weight, they aren’t comfortable.”  She threw open the closet door. “Anyway, they would bring back too many memories that I would rather forget.”

“You know, you spent eight years with him,
” Cindy said, reaching her wine glass toward Jenna for a refill. “Aren’t there any good memories?” 

Grace smiled
. “Yeah, the time Lee was pushed in the swimming pool at a suave company party.”  She laughed out loud. “Oh, if only you guys could’ve been there. Here he was trying to make such a good impression with the members of his firm and the movie stars.”  She snickered. “And he ended up dripping wet in the pool. At the time I felt sorry for him, but now looking back I see he deserved it.”  She wiped her nose. “He’d been flirting with an actor’s wife and the man ‘accidentally’ shoved Lee into the pool.”

“Humph...from what you’ve told me, he deserved mo
re than that.”  Cindy pulled a sleek red, Valentino gown from the closet. “Look at this,” she said with reverence. “It’s beautiful.”

“Take it, it’s yours
. It’ll look great on you with your dark hair.”  Grace lay on the bed, watching Cindy holding the form fitting gown against her chest in front of the mirror. “Jenna, there’s a Donna Karan black dress in there that would look fabulous on you. Wear it to the Starlight Inn and you’ll knock Charlie's socks off.”

Cindy handed the
black gown to Jenna. “Try it on. I want to see you in it. Grace is right. You’ll look great in this color.”

Jenna
went into the bathroom to slip the dress on. Cindy glanced at Grace. “You do know, since you don’t want Charlie, it’s my mission in life to get Jenna and him together. They’d be good together and I think they could really have it all.”  She picked up her wine glass and held it toward Grace. “Here’s to having it all.”   

Their glasses clinked in unison
. “To Jenna and Charlie. They’re good people and deserve each other.”  Cindy grinned. “They just don’t know it yet.”

Jenna
walked into the bedroom wearing the black dress, twirling around, modeling for them.

Cindy let out a wolf whistle
. “Wow, wait till Charlie sees you in this. We’ll have to get dressed up and do something special. You’ll blow his mind.”

“Do you think so
? I want him to notice me as a woman, not just his good buddy who pitches in at the restaurant when he needs it.”

“Oh yeah, he’ll notice.
”  Grace laughed. “He’d have to be struck blind not to notice your cleavage.”   

Jenna
held her hand to her chest. “Is it too much?”  She turned around in front of Grace’s full length mirror, admiring herself.

“Not at all
. It’s just right.”  Cindy set her wine glass down and walked over to Jenna to pull her long auburn hair back from her face. “You have to wear your hair up so it’ll bring out those wonderful cheekbones and show off that gorgeous neck. You could be a model.”

Jenna
laughed. “You’ve had one too many, but thanks anyway.”

“No,
Jenna, she’s right. You have a classic look with your auburn hair and those big blue eyes. I have to do your makeup.”  Grace stepped across the room and pulled out a carrying case. This was the first time she’d had any desire to touch her makeup kit since she became ill. “Can I do it now?”

“Sure, if you feel like it.
”  Jenna sat on the edge of the bed.

Grace pulled out brushes and pots of colored pastes and scattered them across the bed
. “With a bit of color, your eyes will look marvelous.”  She applied a dark brown shade to Jenna’s eyebrow, working in a light shade and a smudge of pink. “Look at her, Cindy. Isn’t she beautiful?”

“Yes,
sirree, Charlie is in big trouble.”  They burst out in a fit of giggles.

“Ladies, I think the wine is getting to us and doesn’t it feel great?
”  Jenna smiled into the mirror at Grace’s handiwork. “I’ve never looked so glamorous. Maybe there’s hope for me and Charlie yet. I can’t wait till he sees me in this dress. Valentine’s Day isn’t that far away."

Cindy snatched a bottle of bright red nail polish from Grace's make-up case and reached down and painted her big toe
. "This evening calls for a new beginning for all of us. Give me your big toes. Right here, right now, we'll make a pact."  She painted their big toes the shimmering red and they all stuck their painted toe toward each other touching feet and held hands. "We will not give up on love. We will all have a second chance at love. Whenever we see this vibrant red color it will give us the courage to go forth and find our soul mates."

***