No Matter What (58 page)

After everything that had happened, life was finally good again.
 
It had taken a while, and there’d been times when she’d wondered whether getting married had been the right thing to do, she’d wondered whether it had almost been a knee-jerk reaction to everything that had happened, but she loved Michael.
 
She loved him so much and after everything they’d gone through together, she didn’t want to be with anyone else.

They’d been married for almost five years now and sometimes she found it hard to believe that time could pass so quickly.
 
They’d moved out of the house in Beverly Hills shortly after returning from Las Vegas; neither of them had wanted to stay there, there were far too many memories.
 
Their new home was a large and very private estate in the Hollywood Hills, close to Reece, and a place where both she and Michael could make that fresh start, a new beginning.
 
But they’d also bought a beautiful beach house in
Malibu
, their get-away-from-it-all place, and she loved it there.
 
The beach had always been a special place for
India
.
 
It brought her a feeling of calm, and she often went there when Michael was out of town.
 
She loved to just sit and watch the ocean, listening to music or just thinking about the future.
 
A future she’d finally realised she could look forward to.
 

Today was her thirty-third birthday, but, more importantly as far as she was concerned, it was also the day Michael was due home.
 
He’d been away for a few months now shooting a movie in the
U.K.
, and she’d just finished filming in
Arizona
, so they hadn’t seen each other for what felt like an eternity.
 
She’d come to their Malibu beach house because she wanted a bit of time alone with the man she hadn’t seen for so long, and this was the perfect place to spend that time.
 
In the most perfect of settings.
 
She’d already seen Reece for a birthday breakfast, already been to lunch at
Venice
Beach
with Kenny - where they’d also had something else to celebrate - and she’d spoken to Vince on the ‘phone after he’d sent her the most incredible diamond necklace from Vegas.
 
But the present she really wanted was her husband home.

She pulled the lounger further into the sun and stepped out of the short chiffon kaftan she was wearing to reveal a white bikini and an incredible body, toned and tanned and constantly in demand from photographers and advertisers.
 
She had a beauty that people craved, and companies fought to win her as the face of their brand, but she had favourites she always worked with and she was fiercely loyal to them, while they in turn were more than grateful to have her on board, paying her vast amounts of money to keep her loyalty.

Settling down on the lounger she pushed her sunglasses down over her eyes, leaning over to switch the CD player on, the sounds of The Steve Miller Band’s ‘Rock’n Me’
 
making her tap her fingers and smile as she thought about Michael.
 
Their last ‘phone conversation, not ten minutes ago as he was leaving the airport to drive home, had been full of promises, talk of birthday presents that didn’t need wrapping, and just knowing he was on his way made India feel like a kid waiting for Christmas Day.
 

They’d had their ups and downs in these first few years of marriage, but then, who didn’t?
 
No-one had promised them life would be a fairytale, and she’d certainly had proof of that.
 
Michael had mood swings, days when he became quite introverted, when he would sit in his study alone for hours, and there were also times when he’d become quite possessive, usually when he was away from home and she was in L.A., alone.
 
He’d ask questions about who she’d seen that day and what she was doing that evening but it soon passed.
 
He just cared about her, that’s all.
 
And after everything that had happened he just wanted to protect her as much as he could.
 
She understood that.
 
But she didn’t need protecting.
 
Not anymore.

The music changed to a Bon Jovi track and she closed her eyes, letting the music wash over her.
 
Michael would be home soon and then her birthday could really begin.

***

Kenny Ross had realised, on the day she’d married Michael Walsh, that India was never coming back to him, and, as hard as that was for him to come to terms with, he knew that night back in 1997 had somehow changed something in everyone.
 
None of them could waste life, none of them wanted to, and although he was always going to love
India
– always – he’d known that he couldn’t wait for something that was never going to happen.
 
Even though a part of him could never really put to rest what he felt for that woman.
 
His ex-wife.
 
His best friend.
 
But, as he’d watched her walk up the aisle on Reece’s arm, and seen how beautiful she was, knowing she’d once been his, it had been hard.
 
Very hard.

 
He’d had plenty of women as the years had gone on, but now, at the age of thirty-seven, he knew he’d never really been in love with anyone.
 
Except
India
.

Those helpless feelings he’d had at the time of those events had stayed with him for months afterwards, and the guilt he’d carried with him had never gone away, even though nobody had put any blame on anyone.
 
He’d just felt responsible in some way.

But what he’d been so thankful for, so grateful for, was that his friendship with
India
had remained intact.
 
He hadn’t had a lot of contact with her during her time with Michael in Vegas, those months when she’d hidden herself away from the world, but then nobody had really had that much contact with her during that time, not even Vince, and he’d been in the same city.
 
She’d called him a couple of times to see how he was doing, but he hadn’t been able to think straight until she’d arrived back in
L.A.
 
Although, arriving back with news of a wedding wasn’t what Kenny had wanted to hear.
 
It wasn’t something he’d ever freely admitted to, because it had been a totally selfish thought, but he’d hoped, somewhere in the back of his mind, that she and Michael would have returned from Vegas further apart rather than closer together but that hadn’t been the case.
 

But, amidst the disappointment, he was just happy that she was back in his life, in whatever capacity that happened to be.
 
He was still the one she turned to if she needed to talk, still the one she rang at 3am in the morning when Michael was out of town and she was lonely.
 
He was still the one she hung out with at rock gigs and festivals and to still have that, after everything that had happened, was something Kenny never took for granted.

They’d spent one amazing weekend at
Glastonbury
when Michael had been over in the
U.K.
doing promotional work on a movie he’d had due out.
 
While he’d been doing the rounds of radio stations and TV interviews, Kenny and
India
had commandeered an on-site trailer at the festival and had the best three days just hanging out and listening to music.
 
It had been as if, for those precious few days, the old times had come back.
 
A bit like the couple of hours he’d just spent with her down at
Venice
Beach
.
 
They’d had lunch, walked around for a bit watching everything go on around them, talking and laughing.
 
It’d been fun.
 
He loved those times.
 
He always had.

He threw the script he’d been reading down on the floor and went outside, needing a breath of fresh air, even though he’d been outside for most of the day.
 
The script was for a movie he’d had every intention of doing from the word go.
 
He’d never been so sure of accepting a movie role before in his life but he hadn’t had to be asked twice for this one.
 
Because his co-star was India Walsh.

***

Michael drove home faster than he maybe should have done but he was in a hurry.
 
It wasn’t an emergency, well, not in the eyes of anyone else but him, but he hadn’t seen his beautiful wife for almost three months now and to say he’d missed her would be an understatement.
 
And today was her birthday.
 
He wanted to give her a special evening, anything she wanted they’d do.
 
He smiled to himself; hoping one of those things would involve sex.
 
Three months away had been hard, especially talking to her every day and knowing he couldn’t just reach out and touch her.
 
He hated being away from her.
 
He hated it with a passion but he couldn’t change it.
 
This was what they did and this was what it involved but it didn’t mean to say that he had to get used to it.
 

It was worse when he knew she was in
L.A.
without him, when he knew she’d see Kenny, knew they’d be going out together and knowing that was never, ever going to get any easier.
 
Even after everything that had gone on that nagging jealousy of their friendship still ate away at him.
 
All these years he’d never let on to anyone that he knew about her and Kenny’s affair.
 
There was no point really.
 
What would he gain from it?
 
India
was his wife now and that was all that mattered.
 
She’d married
him.
 
Surely now Kenny had got the message.

He smiled again as he remembered their wedding day, that beautiful, warm and sunny day that had signalled the end of the past and the beginning of their future. He could still remember turning round to see her walking up the aisle and feeling almost breathless at the sight of her.
 
She’d looked stunning.
 
Like a beautiful butterfly emerging from the cocoon of sadness she’d been wrapped in for so long.
 
He’d seen it in her eyes, those dark clouds lifting and the brightness returning.
 
It had been the day his angel had returned to him.

The only thing that had sometimes come between them over these first few years of marriage had been the subject of children.
 
India
just closed down whenever he tried to bring it up, she didn’t want to talk about it, didn’t want to know anymore.
 
Michael had always wanted to try again and in the beginning he’d tried to talk to her, tried to bring the subject up on many an occasion but she was having none of it.
 
She didn’t want children and that was the end of it as far as she was concerned.
 
Although he still hoped she’d change her mind because he wasn’t getting any younger.
 
He was forty- nine years old now, still in good shape, still very fit, but Michael knew that kids were hard work and if they
were
going to have any he’d rather it was sooner than later.

Pulling up outside their
Malibu
beach house he practically jumped out of the car, running up the steps that led to the front door, throwing his bag and jacket onto the hall floor and walking through the house into the large and airy living room that looked out over the ocean.
 
He smiled as he saw her lying on the sun lounger, tapping her fingers along to the music, her body covered only by a tiny white string bikini.
 
This is what he loved coming home to.
 
Three months away and he got to come home to his gorgeous wife dressed in next to nothing.
 
He was one hell of a lucky man.

She had the doors to the garden closed, to keep the air conditioning inside working, so he quietly slid them open and walked outside, crouching down beside her, gently kissing her slightly open mouth.

“Happy birthday, kiddo.”

She opened her eyes and let out a little squeal, jumping up and throwing herself into his arms.
 
“Michael!”
 

She hugged him tight, and then pulled away slightly so she could look at him.
 
He’d lost his tan but then she knew better than anyone that three months in
Britain
could do that to someone, even in the middle of summer.
 
But he looked in incredible shape.
 
His role in this movie had been quite a demanding one and he’d spent months with a personal trainer before filming had begun so he’d looked good when he’d left for the
U.K.
, but he looked even better now.
 
She could feel through his shirt just how toned he was.
 
His face had a touch of stubble on it as she ran her fingers over it, over that still-so-gorgeous mouth of his that, even after all these years, she still wanted to kiss for hours.
 
He looked the sexiest she’d ever seen him look.
 
He seemed to be getting better looking as he got older and she found herself getting turned on just at the thought of what might happen later.