No Matter What (79 page)

Michael splashed cold water on his face and looked at his reflection.
 
He was almost fifty years old now and, although he looked a lot younger, he still looked older than he wanted to be.
 
But it was finally happening.
 
He was going to get another chance to be a dad with the only woman he’d ever been in love with.
 
The only woman he ever
would
be in love with.
 

Staring at his reflection, a wave of guilt washed over at him at what he’d been doing, because Vince was right.
 
What he was doing was spying on his wife but he was only doing that because he loved her so much, because he was scared of losing her.
 
Or was it because he didn’t trust her?
 
No, he trusted
her
, he didn’t trust Kenny Ross.
 
But if India ever found out what he’d been doing he’d lose her, he knew that, so he should put a stop to it, he should call it off, he knew that’s what he
should
do, but until he knew for sure that India was pregnant he couldn’t do it.
 
Even though he should.
 
It wasn’t right, even
he
knew that, it wasn’t what ordinary people did and he’d stop it, he would.
 
As soon as he knew that their baby was on the way he’d put an end to it.
 
Because as soon as that baby was on the way he could relax.
 

“Come on then, Walsh.
 
We’ve a job to do here,”
India
smiled, as he came back into the bedroom.

He couldn’t help but stare at her.
 
His beautiful wife, and she was his.
 
She was all his, couldn’t he just accept that and forget everything else?
 
No, he couldn’t.

“Are you ok?” she asked, trying hard to hide just how scared she really was because she knew she was going into this for reasons that weren’t 100% certain.
 
The only certainty was that she loved Michael and that was what she needed to hold onto.

“I’m fine,” he smiled.
 
“Believe me, I am more than fine.”

And as his body touched hers, his kisses calming her down, she relaxed and let herself give in to him, let him make love to her slowly and carefully, almost as if this was the only way to make a baby, the only way to make sure it happened, but there was still a part of her that was scared, terrified even.
 
There was a still a part of her that wanted to tell him to stop, but that was outweighed by the part of her that wanted – needed – this to happen.
 
In one afternoon she’d made what was probably the single most important decision of her life.
 
One afternoon could have determined her entire future, and it felt different this time; knowing what they were doing and why.
 
It felt different.
 
She
felt different, and if she felt different now what was she going to feel like when she was actually carrying this baby?
 
 
This as yet unmade baby.
 
But, as she arched her back, his arms holding her tight against him as it all came to that familiar crashing end, she knew there was no going back now.
 
That was it, the decision had been made and the journey had begun.

She held onto him tightly as their breathing calmed down.
 
She felt safe in his arms, she felt warm and happy and safe and if only everything could be like this.
 
If only she didn’t have to go back to Vegas, back to Kenny.
 
Back to being away from where she wanted to be.

Michael turned over onto his back and she lay on her side, facing him, and as he looked at her there was something in her eyes that he couldn’t quite place, something that was still worrying her, he could tell.

“Why do you want this to happen so quickly,
India
?
 
Why the sudden change of heart?”

She sat up, pulling her knees up and hugging them.
 
“I thought you wanted it too, Michael.”

“Hey, I do, baby.
 
I do.”
 
He sat up behind her, kissing the back of her neck, running his fingers lightly up and down her arms.
 
“But you always seemed so against it.
 
Look at what happened in Vegas.”

“I’ve had time to think,” she said, leaning back against him, letting him stroke her skin, knowing it would lead to sex again as his hands moved down, and she wanted that.
 
She did.
 
“You wanted me to think about it and I did.
 
I thought about it.”

“Is it going to make you happy?”

She turned round and looked at him.
 
“
You
make me happy, Michael.
 
A baby’s just going to make it all the more perfect.”

He smiled at her, wanting to believe she meant that but not entirely convinced.
 
Maybe she had her own reasons for wanting this baby and he wasn’t going to question them anymore, because the only thing that mattered was that she wanted it.
 
With him. Everything else just wasn’t important.
 
They were going to be a family, and for the first time in a long time he felt as if the most important part of their future was finally falling into place.

CHAPTER 40

The news that Charley was sleeping with the boss had spread through the hotel like wild fire.
 
Most people were happy for her – she was a popular girl, and everyone loved Vince – but a few of the girls she worked with had started displaying what could only be described as signs of jealousy.
 
It wasn’t like she hadn’t expected it.
 
It was why she’d been so nervous about it all coming out in the open in the first place.
 
But it still hurt when people she’d thought were her friends now froze her out simply because of who she was with.

“Don’t let them get to you,” Casey said as they got changed after another successful performance.
 
“They’re only jealous that they’re not in your shoes.
 
Any one of them would kill to be where you are now.”

Charley ran a cleansing wipe over her face, removing some of the heavy stage make-up they wore for the show.

“I hear what they say though, Casey.
 
They think I only got this job because of Vince, but we weren’t even together when I auditioned.
 
I hadn’t seen him for years until a few weeks ago.”

Casey looked at her friend.
 
Only a couple of the girls were acting this way but their pathetic behaviour was becoming really irritating.

“It’s their way of dealing with the jealousy they’re feeling, Charley.
 
You have everything they want and they can’t get their heads round that in any other way apart from bitching about you.
 
In their sad little world it makes them feel better.
 
Don’t let them upset you.”
 
She reached over and squeezed Charley’s hand.
 
“I’m really happy for you.
 
Vince is lovely.”

Charley smiled.
 
“Thanks, Casey.”

“Oh, speak of the devil,” Casey said as Vince walked into their dressing room.

“Another fantastic show,” Vince grinned, leaning over to kiss Charley on the mouth then Casey on the cheek.

“Were you watching?” Charley asked, shaking out her dark hair and running her fingers through it.

“I had a few hours spare and I couldn’t think of a better way to spend them than watching you do what you do so brilliantly.”
 
He leaned back against the dressing table and folded his arms.
 
“Look, I know it’s late and you’re probably tired but, do you fancy a drink?
 
Maybe something to eat?
 
I’ve hardly seen you today ... unless you’ve got other plans?”

Charley looked at Casey, who shook her head, grabbed her bag and coat and stood up.
 
“Don’t look at me, I’m whacked.
 
I’m off home for a bath and bed.”
 
She smiled at Charley.
 
“I won’t wait up.
 
See you later, guys.”

“Goodnight, Casey,” Vince smiled, turning his attention back to Charley.
 
“So?
 
Do you fancy that drink then?”

She nodded, standing up and stepping into his arms for a hug.
 
“Yeah, I could do with a drink but, can we just go to your apartment, Vince?
 
I don’t fancy any of the bars tonight.”

He kissed her quickly.
 
“Sure, sweetheart.
 
Do you want to stay over?”

She smiled at him, thinking how lucky she was to have found this man.
 
He was just perfect.
 
“Yeah.
 
Yeah, I do want to stay over.”

He smiled too, pushing her hair back off her face.
 
“Good.
 
Because since meeting you I don’t much like being alone anymore.
 
I miss you when you’re not there.
 
Charley ...”

He stopped mid-sentence and she looked at him.
 
“What’s up?”

“Nothing ... nothing’s up.”
 
His mouth was dry and for the first time in his life Vince felt slightly out of control of a situation.
 
Charley had changed his whole way of thinking, his whole way of looking at things and she was making him do things he’d never have dreamt of doing before.
 
He was about to do one of them now.

“Come on,” she smiled, noticing how he’d suddenly become nervous.
 
Vince was never nervous.
 
“You looked like you wanted to say something so, just say it.”

He squeezed her waist and took a deep breath.
 
“I want you to think about moving in with me, Charley.”

There.
 
He’d said it.
 
He’d never wanted to give up his freedom and independence before.
 
Nobody had ever made him feel the need but Charley - Charley was different.
 
He loved her, simple as that.
 
He loved her.

Charley was still looking at him; surprised at what she’d just heard because she knew how hard that would have been for Vince to do, but she felt unbelievably happy.
 
Because for Vince to ask her to live with him meant that he really did love her.
 
Without question now she knew that he really loved her.

“Charley?
 
Will you think about it?”

She shook her head.
 
“No.”

Vince’s expression changed and he felt his heart sink.
 
“You won’t think about it?”

She shook her head again.
 
“I won’t think about it because I don’t need to.
 
The answer’s yes.
 
I’ll move in with you.
 
Just try and stop me.”

Vince smiled, relief washing over him as he picked her up and swung her round and she squealed, clinging onto him until he put her back down.

“Ok.
 
I think it’s time we went up to our apartment and ordered some champagne,” he said, still smiling, and Charley felt her stomach do somersaults as he said the words “our apartment”.
 
Because that’s what it was now.
 
“We’ve got something to celebrate after all, haven’t we?”

Charley smiled too as she slipped her hand into his.
 
“Yeah.
 
We have.”

Everything was happening for Charley now.
 
It was all working out so perfectly.
 
She had a job she enjoyed and a man she loved, her life was good.
 
The only thing missing was her best friend.
 
India
was due back in Vegas in a few days time and, according to Vince, she wanted to talk.
 
She wanted to say sorry for the way she’d acted before she’d left for
L.A.
and Charley was both apprehensive and excited at the prospect.
 
Although she didn’t want
India
’s apology.
 
There was nothing to apologise for.
 
She just wanted the past put to rest and a future to look forward to.

“You ok?” Vince asked as Charley got her stuff together and they got ready to leave.

“Yeah, I’m fine.
 
I’m just thinking about
India
.”

Vince squeezed her hand.
 
“I spoke to her today.
 
She seems really happy. Being back in
L.A.
with Michael has obviously been good for her.”

Charley looked at him.
 
“Do you think we could ever be friends again, Vince? Me and
India
?
 
Because I miss her.
 
I really miss her.”