Not Enough: Is love ever enough? (The Enough Series Book 1) (12 page)

I hurry to
the bathroom sure I am about to pee in my pants. Thankfully, the bathroom isn’t
crowded and I walk right into a stall. I sit down and wait for sweet relief
that doesn’t seem to come. What the hell?

I can feel the knot in my abdomen and a fullness that feels
like a full bladder. I wait another moment and a tiny tinkle comes that does
nothing to loosen the knot in my belly. As I go to clean myself, I realize I am
beyond wet. Leave it to me to confuse urination and horny. However, in my defense
it has been nearly four years since anyone has had the opportunity to elicit
those feelings. I’m a do-it-yourself kind of girl in that department either. Well,
shit what am I going to do now? I guess it is time Austin and I get out of
here.

Just as I am straightening my dress and readying to leave the
stall, two women walk into the bathroom giggling. One says, “Holy shit, did you
see those two?” I know I should probably leave the stall, but I am curious where
their conversation is headed.

The other girl responds, “I know, that was intense. I would
kill to have a man look at me like that.”

Are they talking about Austin and I, I wonder. “Well, at
least you got to dance with Austin freaking Black.”

She claps her hands before her friend responds, “Yeah but there
is no way I could compete with that woman who cut in. He wants her.”

Well now, I feel a little bad for her. Her friend responds, “Oh
honey, there are very few women in the world that could compete with that
goddess. Her legs went on forever, and her hair,” she pauses before resuming, “And
yeah he definitely wants her, the look on his face was pure passion.”

I quickly decide to stop eavesdropping so I flush the toilet
and make my way out of the stall. As I walk towards the sinks where they are
standing, I smile at the blonde who was dancing with Austin. She starts
blushing obviously aware I could hear their exchange from the bathroom stall.

“Hi, I would like to thank you for earlier,” I say to her.

She looks at me like I lost my mind, “Why would you thank me?”

I step to the sink and begin washing my hands. “Well, I thank
you because you did not create a scene. I appreciate it.”

She gives me a small smile. “Oh, well you are welcome. But to
be honest, I could tell by the way he was looking at you that he wouldn’t have
noticed if I had stripped down naked.”

The way she says that last line is very self-deprecating. I feel
like I should explain that what happened out there in no way reflected on her. “Things
between Austin and I are complicated and I am sorry you were caught in it.”

While drying my hands an idea forms. “Hey ladies we have a
table upstairs and while I can’t share Austin, my brother and his best friend
are single and gorgeous.”

They both stare at me in complete shock so I continue. “If
you are just looking for a good time those two are perfect, but if you are
looking for a forever kind of thing they might be trouble. You are welcome to
join us if you would like.”

They look at each other and nod before the brunette responds,
“Sure that sounds awesome thanks. I am Abby and this is my friend Haley.”

I smile at them both, “I am Rylee, why don’t we go introduce
you girls to Jeremy and Bode.”

I admit I have an ulterior motive here, I figure if I can
pair J and Bode up Austin and I can leave unnoticed and embrace the raging
hormones coursing through my system. I have been dreaming of getting to this
point with Austin and I see no reason we should prolong the wait now.

We walk out of the bathroom together with Abby and Haley
whispering how excited they are. If they only knew how much trouble J and Bode
can be. I will warn those two boys to be on their best behavior. I have caused
poor Haley enough self-doubt tonight.

Both girls stand about six inches shorter than me even with
six-inch heels on. Abby has long brunette hair and bright brown eyes. Haley is
a beautiful girl with shoulder length blonde hair and deep green eyes. She has
a great body with curves in all the right places, I can’t figure out why she
doubts herself.

As we near the bar, I lock eyes with Austin and I see a flash
of panic in his eyes as he sees the two girls with me. Bode on the other hand
gives be a huge smile and wink. I am glad to see he is back to his old self.

Walking straight up to Austin I put my arm around his waist
and introduce him and Bode to the girls. Bode offers to buy them a drink. They
accept happily. Austin leans down in to my ear, “Make some friends in the
bathroom?”

I elbow him playfully in the ribs and turn into him to
explain, “I felt bad for her. I won’t share you, but Bode and J are free so why
not. Plus, if I distract J and Bode with beautiful women they won’t notice when
we slip out of here shortly.” I raise my eyebrows at him suggestively.

He gives me a quick squeeze and kisses my neck. “I like the way
you think gorgeous.” Yep, time to get out of here. Austin kissing my neck and
his warm breath grazing my skin has ratcheted up the excitement in my nether
region to near unmanageable levels. I’m forced to squeeze my thighs together
just to try to extinguish the fire.

We all make our way upstairs to the private table and J jumps
up, “It’s about damn time,” and then he notices Abby and Haley so I introduce
them.

The space Jeremy has reserved is nice. It has one large black
couch and two smaller black loveseats arranged around circular black table with
gorgeous silver embellishments. The space is cozy and walled in on three sides giving
privacy. The dance floor below is visible from the balcony.

As everyone says their hellos, I see Eric sitting with his
girlfriend on one of the loveseats. I make my way over to say hello with Austin
in tow. “Hey buddy, long time no see,” I say warmly. He stands up and hugs me
tightly. I find it hard to hug him back as Austin seems reluctant to let go of
my hand. I pull back and introduce the two. Eric introduces Jen to Austin.

Jen has never been a fan of Bode or J because she thinks they
are bad influences on Eric. She might be right, but I still don’t think that is
a reason to make Eric choose her over them. It is my opinion she should try
harder to get to know them then she would understand everything they do is in
fun. Moreover, she would be hard pressed to find two people who care more about
Eric than Bode and J. They have been friends since they were kids. I say a polite
hello to Jen and walk back over to join J and Bode.

Everyone sits down and I am sitting between Austin and J on
the large couches. I notice that since the floor show I put on earlier Austin
has not taken his hands off me. He keeps our hands laced or a hand on me in one
way or another. I find it sweet but wonder whether he does it for his benefit,
or for mine, or if he is sending a message. I really couldn’t say, Ryan was
never one to be overly possessive or to indulge in public displays of
affection. Well, one thing is for sure, Austin certainly is not Ryan, thank
god!

The chatter dies down as a waitress clad in nothing more than
a bikini shows up with a round of tequila shots for everyone. After throwing
back the shots, Bode announces it is time to dance. He grabs Haley by the hand
and pulls her towards the stairs. Jeremy and Abby follow right behind leaving
Austin and me with Eric and Jen.       

Austin leans toward me and whispers, “So how long until they
are sufficiently distracted?”

I laugh and slap him playfully on the chest. “Why are you in
a hurry to get somewhere,” I ask suggestively.

With his mouth practically in my ear he says, “Oh no baby we
can stay as long as you want.” Then he lightly bites my earlobe before kissing
my neck.
Holy wow.

I shift in my seat and try to control my breathing that
continues to escalate with every kiss. He stops abruptly and looks at me with a
smirk. “So you want to dance or what?”

I glare at him playfully. “You sir play dirty, so I will just
move over here,” I reply sliding across the away from his delicious touch.

He gives me a chuckle and smiles revealing his beautiful
dimples before coming to me and wrapping himself around me. “You really think
three feet will save you, I have been waiting for this since the day we met.”

Truthfully, I think I was waiting for it too. I just did not realize
it until recently.

It is clear we need to get out of this club before we give
the people anymore of a show than they have already received. I am turned on
beyond belief. I don’t remember ever being this turned on. I stand up and
Austin looks at me questioningly, “Time to start our goodbye tour.”

He nods and stands up, “Hell yes, but it had better be a
quick tour.”

I walk over to Eric and hug him goodbye ignoring the spiteful
glare Jen is giving me. We then make our way down stairs in search of J and
Bode. I spot J in the middle of the dance floor with Abby. They appear to be
having a great time. I begin weaving my way through the horde of bodies, which
is increasingly difficult since Austin will not let go of my hand. Once I reach
J, I tap him on the shoulder and he turns to me briefly. “We are going to go,” I
explain. He nods and smiles as he resumes dancing with Abby.

Just as I am about to lead us back off the dance floor Austin
surprises me by grabbing me from behind and forcing me to dance with him. He
pulls my hips into him and begins moving in time with the music. He has both
arms wrapped around me so I have little choice but to move with him. His sexual
excitement pressing into me elevates my already intense sexual frustration.
Damn
he can move. I can’t wait to check out his other moves.

As the song changes he turns me and kisses me with no
restraint before dragging me off the dance floor and out of the club. “Did you
drive,” he asks demandingly.

“No, I rode with J,” I answer quickly.

He smiles and pulls me with him towards parking lot. He removes
his phone from his pocket and types out a quick message. Seconds later, a black
town car appears in front of us. I look at him perplexed as he opens the door
and helps me into the car. “I always hire a car service when I go out, no need
for unnecessary risks.” He winks and I swear my panties melt.  

After
stopping by my house for a change of clothes and to pick Boss up, we arrive at
Austin’s palace. We decided to stay at his place tonight since there is a good
chance Bode and J will end up back at my house with companions before the night
is over. I am beyond nervous. I have butterflies in my stomach, and my hands
are clammy.

The drive from the club was quiet as Austin caressed my leg
and held me close. We both seemed to be lost in thought pondering the sudden
direction the night has taken. Once we exit the town car Austin takes Boss’s
leash and my hand before leading us inside. Once indoors, Austin releases Boss
and he makes himself at home in the middle of Austin’s couch. I can’t help smiling
even my dog loves being around Austin.

Ignoring the palpable tension in the air, I walk over to the
couch to remove my unbearably uncomfortable heels. I notice Austin watching me
from the corner of my eye as he unloads his keys, cell phone, and wallet into a
small bowl on the sofa table. As I slip the first shoe off I hear him chuckle. “And
she’s back.”

I frown at him and playfully toss the shoe his way. “What is
that supposed to mean?”

He smiles as he catches my heel. “Nothing, just that it appears
Cinderella is done with her glass slippers.”

While taking the second shoe off I mock him. “Ha ha, my
hypocrisy only goes so far. You try wearing these damn things.” With my shoes
off, my feet feel better, but the rest of me is tied in knots. Why is this so
uncomfortable?

I nervously watch Austin as he runs his hands through that
sexy as hell hair. I can see lust in his eyes, but the indecision in them
worries me. He walks towards me with hesitation. “Maybe we shouldn’t do this
Ry.”

What the hell, I thought this is what he wants and has been
waiting for. I thought we were finally on the same page. Before my heart sinks
any further or my humiliation escalates, I ask, “What’s the problem Austin, I
thought you wanted this. I mean you seemed like you did earlier.”

He shakes his head nonchalantly increasing my panic level
before he reaches out and runs his warm hands up and down my arms in a soothing
manner. I want to tell him to get his hands off me, but although he is causing
my anxiety now, he is also helping me fight it. “Ry, I want this more than you
know. I am just afraid you made your decision based on not wanting to lose me
rather than wanting more with me.”

Is that what I did? Does it matter? No. I made my choice. I
want him and he wants me I can see it in his eyes.

“Austin I will not tell you that the fear of losing you
didn’t influence my decision because it did. That fear forced me to realize
what was staring me in the face all along. We both know we have practically
been dating since we met just without the sex.” I am frustrated now and heavy tears
are forming in my eyes as I look up at him.

He is watching me with those deep blue eyes and I see so much
adoration it breaks my heart. “Ry, I don’t want to wake up tomorrow to find you
have changed your mind. I would rather fight myself daily to stay friends with
you than to ruin it all in one night.”

My tears fall freely. He is trying to protect me at the
expense of himself. If I wasn’t sure of my decision before I am now.

“Austin, regardless of how I came to my decision the fact
remains I chose you. I choose you. I have never felt more alive in my entire
life than I have with you tonight. Austin Black, I am madly in love with you.”

With tears running down my cheeks and sobs setting in I
continue, “Austin, you have changed everything, you have made my life better. You
are repairing my broken heart, but yes to answer your question, I am scared. I
am scared of losing you and never finding another chance like this again.”

Without as much as a word, he tugs me into him and wraps his
arms around me as I continue to sob. I gently slide my hands up his strong back
as I try to control my emotional outburst. My mascara is smearing on his shirt
and down my cheeks. I’m sure I look like a hot mess. I know I feel like one.

Barely above a whisper he says, “I am madly in love with you
too, baby. You will never lose me Ry. I will never walk away from you willingly.”

If only I could convince myself of that, the world would be
perfect. Why does this have to be so hard? I love him, he loves me, and so this
should be the easiest thing in the world, right.

We stand there wrapped around one another for another few
minutes as my breathing evens out and the tears stop falling. Stepping back
from him, I see the horrific mascara stains on his crisp white shirt. His shirt
now looks like an inkblot from a psychological test. “Oh crap, I ruined your
shirt. I am so sorry.”

He gives me a small smile, reaches down, and rubs his thumbs
below my eyes wiping away more black goo. He then dramatically wipes it off on
his shirt. “There now we are in it together and for the record you could ruin
every shirt I own and I wouldn’t care. They make more shirts but there is only
one of you.”

With that, he slides his hands under my jaw and bends down to
kiss me. It is the most sensual and passionate kiss of my life. Yes, we are in
this together. I need to keep reminding myself of that.