Only Love (44 page)

“We had Abby,” I said. “Me twenty-one and her barely twenty. I left college to go into the academy. Support her and our new baby quicker. She eventually had to leave school too when it got too hard to juggle both. I think she felt trapped. Lia. She was forced to grown up. We both were.”

Aubrey moved her fingers up and down my chest again, listening while I spoke, and I realized something I guess I never had before. No one knew struggle the way this woman in my arms did, being forced to grow up when all you wanted to do was have something for yourself. She and I were kindred, connected more deeply than I ever knew.

“Do you ever get sad?” she asked, staring at me. “That it didn’t work out?”

I didn’t let the question linger in the air. I simply lowered Aubrey to her back, encasing her, protecting her in my arms like I always would. Holding her close by her shoulders, I kissed her deeply,
showing
her my answer. I believe I would have stayed with Lia forever. I would have been faithful to her forever, but fate didn’t want that. The universe wouldn’t allow that. Forever wasn’t in the cards for us because she wasn’t my destiny.

She wasn’t my Aubrey.

A few months later…

That face of hers was a sight for sore eyes. Man, I swear thoughts of this moment were what kept me fighting, kept me determined to make it home. She was so beautiful, my little girl, the best part of me. She’d gotten so big since the last time I’d seen her. Her hair touched her shoulders now, and judging by her grin, she had a mouthful of teeth. It was more than a year ago when I came home last. It’d been too long. I missed so much.

But never again; that’s my word.

Rissa made her way to the slide, looking like she’d trip over her own feet with that clumsy run, but she never did. I smiled at that too, finding it hard to believe she was so independent now. It didn’t look like she was afraid of anything, which didn’t surprise me. Her mom was one of the most fearless women I’d ever met, and that was one of my favorite things about her. Aubrey. My baby.

The hardest thing in the world was making myself stand there out of view, but I didn’t want to scare Rissa. She didn’t know my face other than what she’d seen of me in pictures her mom had shown her. All she knew was my voice, but I’d change all that. I would. If it took me the rest of my life to get to know her, to make up for the time we’d lost, I’d do that. Marissa was the only proof I had that everything connected to me wasn’t a mess. She was perfect.

“Slow down, Rissa,” a voice rang out. A familiar voice. Aubrey was laughing and out of breath when she finally caught up to our daughter, scooping her up from the grass just as Rissa’s fingers touched the ladder of the slide. “You know you can’t get up there by yourself, silly girl. Let Mommy help you.”

My heart felt so full. I loved them both so much that it nearly killed me to stand off in the shadows, but I had to. I’d been planning this all out for two days now. In fact, instead of going to see Aubrey and Rissa when I first got into the States, I laid low and waited for today—Rissa’s second birthday. Her party, actually. Everyone we knew was there from what I could tell, even my mom. That made me happy to see. That meant she and Aubrey must’ve finally worked things out. It’d been a long time coming.

Aubrey looked so good, like she’d managed to find happiness. That was what I wanted for her. I didn’t want her home falling apart because of what she thought happened to me. She hadn’t. She stayed strong because that’s what Rissa needed.

Situating the big bear for Rissa underneath my arm, I looked down at the roses I’d picked up for Aubrey, realizing we’d have a long road ahead of us, but believing we could fix this. We’d been through too much for that not to be the case. Besides, regardless of how we’d fallen apart in the end, I knew she still loved me.

And I still loved her.

I couldn’t wait anymore. Already it’d been too long since I’d held them both in my arms. There wasn’t anything in the world I wanted more, and I’d gone through a lot to get here. It was time.

‘Relax
,
’
I said in my head, talking myself out of being nervous. Only good could come of this. I believed that.

“You made it,” Aubrey said, wearing a big smile. She stood behind Rissa on the ladder at the top of the slide, guarding our baby’s small body so she wouldn’t fall. She was a good mother just like I imagined she’d be.

I stared on as both of their faces lit up and Rissa’s small hand lifted into the air, pointing toward the end of the slide before clapping her hands. My eyes followed her gaze, and fell on a guy. A guy standing at the end of the same slide with his arms out, waiting for my daughter to come down it. Naturally, I went on the defense, watching, waiting to see what the hell was up. My eyes went to Aubrey to gage her facial expression, but all I found there was a smile.

She was smiling at this dude.

 “Yayyyy,” Rissa sang as she slid from the top of the slide to the bottom into this stranger’s hands. He lifted her into the air and spun her once.

What the fu—

“Ok, now it’s Mommy’s turn,” he said, laughing as he shifted his gaze to Aubrey. She responded with a look of defiance as she chose to climb back down the ladder instead.

I watched them cross the playground—Rissa laying her head on the man’s shoulder, Aubrey’s fingers linked up with his. I didn’t understand. Didn’t understand his role in my family’s life.

But, damn… I was about to.

I stepped forward, but stopped at the sound of my little girl’s voice.

“Daddy, swing! Push me!” my baby said when her eyes lit up again.

Daddy.

She called him Daddy.

That word hit me right in the middle of my chest. Right in my heart, killing the hope I’d allowed myself to have that I’d have them back when I came home. With one word, that slipped away.

My vision went dark, hinted toward red as the bear I’d bought my little girl slipped from my grasp. The roses fell to my feet too when I realized I’d bought them for nothing. Apparently I’d bought them for someone who didn’t exist anymore. They were for
my
girl, not the person I just saw hugged up with some other dude.

Nah… that was someone else.

Someone I didn’t know.

Up next in the
Only Love Series
is Javi’s Story!

ONLY HOPE

Coming Spring 2015

Official Blurb:

Javi

Returning home wasn’t anything like I expected. Life had moved on without me and it’s been a struggle to keep fighting. But I have to. I have to because I stand to lose too much if I don’t. Now, I’ve finally found someone who believes in me.

I needed that more than anything.

Emma

He’s got a lot of anger. He’s got a lot of pain and I usually take on cases with both of those things. But that was before. Before my whole life changed in one breathe. Now, I’ve got enough anger, enough pain for the both of us.

I may need him more than he could ever need me.

Javi and Emma

She’s my only hope. And he’s mine.

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We’d like to thank our families and friends, our readers and writing buddies, as well as the entire creative team behind the release of ONLY LOVE, without whom this book wouldn’t be possible.

- Victoria & Raven <3

Victoria H. Smith has a Bachelor’s Degree in Political Science. She puts it to good use writing romance all day. She resides in the Midwest with her MacBook on her lap and a cornfield to her right. She often draws inspiration for her stories from her own life experiences, and the twenty-something characters she writes give her an earful about it.

In her free time, she enjoys extreme couponing, reading, watching Scandal, and general geekery in the form of Sherlock and DC Comics. She’s a bestselling author and the 2014 Swirl Award winner for Best New Adult Romance. She writes both new adult and adult fiction in many genres, but mainly focuses in contemporary interracial and multicultural romances.