Authors: H. G. Adler
In the morning Herr Neumann is up before sunrise. He dons a stiff collar and a proper tie, which he attaches to his shirt front with a tie pin. He then puts on a dark-brown suit that is too tight, such that it hardly covers his stomach, Arthur having ironed the suit for him the day before, since he was the best at ironing, while on his head Herr Neumann places an elegant and stiff black hat that he wears only to funerals or weddings, he looking much more elegant than Herr Iltis, who also has a hat like this. Herr Neumann then has a cup of coffee while standing up, as well as two pieces of cake, claiming that he has to try some for himself, after which he is done. Toni has already brought out the barouche and hitched up the horses, bringing the wagon out through the gate and past the Schwinghammers’ yard and around to the front of the house. Then he opens the door as Herr Neumann walks out, after which Toni opens the little door on the barouche, Herr
Neumann climbs in, Toni closes the door again and climbs up to the coach box, and the barouche rattles over the cobblestones of the square and away from Umlowitz.
Otherwise everything proceeds as usual, for Herma says that nothing should be left undone, that Otto also needs to be dressed up, that the livestock have to be tended to, though no one heads out to the fields that day, the cattle are kept in the barn, and everyone dresses well, no one runs around barefoot, though the store is opened as usual, Leopold having to tend it on his own, himself very excited and wearing his best suit, a rose placed in his buttonhole, he not saying a word to anyone that Foxy is in the store, even Arthur letting it pass.
Then right before noon the barouche arrives, everyone in Umlowitz peers out their windows, some even stand in front of Herr Neumann’s store in order to see the new Frau Neumann and her brother. As they arrive, Toni jumps down from the coach box and opens the carriage. Herr Neumann steps out and is sweating, because the suit is so horribly tight, after which he bends back into the carriage and gives his hand to the new Frau Neumann, as she steps out with a handbag made of alligator skin and is almost as fat as Herr Neumann, the new Frau Neumann’s brother soon following, himself having a mustache like Herr Lopatka’s, though no one reaches out a hand to help the brother with his little traveling case that is clearly no longer that new. Everyone has gathered in front of the open door to the store in order to greet the guests, bowing to the new Frau Neumann, who shakes everyone’s hand, as does the brother, someone then suggesting that they head into the store, Leopold closing the door behind them. The guests head straight into the kitchen, where there is a lace tablecloth on the table, Herma right away serving a cup of coffee to the new Frau Neumann, who says that she is very happy to be here, for it looks like a pleasant place to live, everyone looking so healthy and happy that even Principal Bolek would be pleased. Then everyone sits down, though the men don’t drink any coffee, beer having been brought along from Schwinghammer’s, as well as schnapps, the brother saying that he prefers to drink caraway rather than plum schnapps, and so they brought him caraway, along with homemade rolls with cold cuts so that everyone is satisfied.
Once they are finished, someone informs the new Frau Neumann that
they must now show her the house and the farmyard, and she says that she’d love to see them, the brother saying the same, the woman mentioning that she has already seen the store and that she was very pleased by it, the brother saying that he can clearly see what a fine store it is. Herr Neumann then informs them that there are no electric lights upstairs, though he will install some if she marries him, to which she replies that it doesn’t matter if there aren’t any lights, one needs only to lie down to sleep. Then she looks at the room where Herr Neumann has his desk, after which they return to the kitchen and move on through and up to the first floor in order to look at all the rooms where everyone sleeps, as well as the big room, where everything is set for lunch, Herr Neumann saying that they usually don’t eat upstairs. The new Frau Neumann replies that it’s all fine with her, at home in Prachatitz they also eat in the kitchen when there’s nothing special going on, after which everyone heads downstairs and out into the farmyard as Herr Neumann explains everything to the new Frau Neumann, the brother commenting on how well everything is fitted out, before they then walk around the stalls and look at the cattle, the woman saying that they looked like nice cows as she pats Cappi on the back. This pleases Herr Neumann, for he says that Cappi gives the most milk, after which they head into the granary, though they only look at the hayloft from down below in order not to ruin their nice clothes, and then they walk out the backdoor, where there are geese, at which the new Frau Neumann says right off what magnificent down they must provide, everyone agreeing with her about the geese, after which they inspect the barn and look at the garden, as Herr Neumann says that some flowers could be planted here, to which Frau Neumann nods in agreement. Then they all turn around and return to the second floor, since it’s already time to eat lunch, the guests sitting down, the new Frau Neumann sitting next to Herr Neumann, her brother beside her, while everyone else is busy carrying out the bowls, moving back and forth. The three talk among themselves, but then the soup is served, Herma having never made a better one, the brother unable to praise it enough and asking for the recipe for the dumplings, while as soon as the soup is finished Herr Neumann stands and says that the two of them have decided to marry, and the new Frau Neumann says that she would love to get married, though she hopes as well that soon Herr Neumann can visit Prachatitz, where the wedding will
take place, she also wanting to show Herr Neumann her brother’s farm, after which, once they are married, she will return to Umlowitz with all of her things.
Everyone is pleased, Praxel crying and blubbering that Herr Neumann had always been so good to her, Poldi crying as well, everyone going up to Herr Neumann and the new Frau Neumann to congratulate them on their engagement, after which there is a lot of eating and drinking, until Josef is entirely exhausted from it all. Then it’s time for the new Frau Neumann and her brother to head off to the station, Toni having already gotten the barouche ready as the brother grabs a bag. Many bundles of food are packed into the barouche, as well as a full bottle of caraway schnapps for the brother, Poldi even going so far as to quickly grab all the flowers from the vases and tossing the bouquet to the new Frau Neumann in the barouche at the last minute, after which everyone continues to wave goodbye until the guests are finally driven off. By then everyone is really tired, Herr Neumann most of all, as he lies stretched out on the sofa in the kitchen and immediately starts to snore, Otto having already gone to bed, Foxy once again in the store as Leopold pets him and Josef falls asleep in his chair.
A
T 21
W
EIMARERSTRASSE STANDS
T
HE
B
OX, A LARGE TWO-STORY BUILDING
that stretches from Rosenbühlstrasse to Pufendorfstrasse, the sides of the central building, as well as those of the outbuildings, lying on each of these two streets. The school is on Pufendorfstrasse, and on Rosenbühlstrasse there are two buildings where some of the professors and teachers live, as well as the inspectors and some of the support staff. In one of the buildings there’s also a walk-in clinic with a nurses’ station, this building being surrounded by gardens, some of them enclosed, though there are little doors along the length of The Box that allow you to enter the courtyard, otherwise you can exit directly into Rosenbühlstrasse, which is the only entrance from the street into the courtyard of The Box. To enter The Box itself, however, you must approach from Weimarerstrasse, where you ring the bell, after which Herr Lindenbaum, the castellan, looks out the window of the porter’s apartment, a buzzer sounds, you push open the front door, and amble through the front garden, which is tended but not used, a set of steps leading down the path to the gate, at which the heavy door opens and you
go up a set of steps to the next level, to the right of which Herr Lindenbaum stands in his window and asks each visitor the purpose of his visit. Right at the end of the steps there’s a door through which you enter the vestibule. To the right is Herr Lindenbaum’s apartment, while farther on is a door on which is written
OFFICE
, after which the vestibule narrows to a hallway that is closed off at the other end by another door. Once you pass through this you reach a well-lit passageway, to the right and left of which are large panes of glass, while on the left is a glass door at the top of a set of stairs that lead into the courtyard, though if you go farther along the hallway you reach yet another door, behind which is the school. Here, to the left, is the door for the conference room, while the school has two sets of stairs, hallways running off each that lead to the classrooms, the lecture halls and labs for physics, chemistry, zoology, and botany, as well as drawing, and the large music room, where Herr Scheck leads singing classes from a grand piano set on a high podium, though the large assembly hall is the most beautiful room of all, its ample splendor opened up only for special occasions.
If you head back to the vestibule you’ll encounter a richly ornate stairway with a sumptuous metal railing, halfway up the steps there being a memorial tablet made of marble on which is engraved in gold all the names of the students who gave their lives for the sake of the fatherland in the world war, The Box remaining proud of them to this day. Just past the tablet, some steps lead to the apartment of Headmaster Schorfing, a lovely bearded old man who is the head of The Box, and who stands straight as an arrow and looks like an admiral. The pupils call him The Bull and all of them are afraid of him and bow to him deeply and sternly, for respect is important to The Bull, not only the pupils trembling before him but also all the subordinates in the school. He knows the names of each of the two hundred and fifty pupils, The Bull sees everything and hears everything, nothing remaining hidden from him. The Bull has an assistant who is referred to as the Director, whose name is Winkler, and whom no one is afraid of, he having little to say unless The Bull himself is out sick. Yet once you are no longer a pupil The Bull can be quite affable, his deep voice growling less and less, and the former pupils, especially, once they have set a number of years between themselves and The Box, act as if they are on the friendliest of terms with The Bull, which The Bull by then allows.
Below in the vestibule on the left side there is a door labeled
VISITORS ROOM
, which is an elegant salon, all the chairs sumptuously covered in scarlet plush, a cut-glass water pitcher standing on the table with some glasses, at which the fathers and mothers sit and listen to what The Bull has to say to them, themselves hardly daring to say a word in response, since they are all smaller than The Bull, and only appreciate what a blessing it is for their boys to be pupils here at The Box. The Bull speaks in measured tones and with condescending friendliness, the fathers and mothers hearing that only obedient boys can remain at The Box, as The Box is not a reform school, but rather is there to raise sound young men who will one day be grateful that they have enjoyed such an upbringing, which is why things here must be run with a firm and unflinching hand, for the youth must not be coddled just because the war was lost through cowardly betrayal. One has to rebuild, and that can be done only with valiant men. Then the pupil is called into the visitors room, The Bull and the parents looking at him gravely, the pupil indeed lowering his head the moment he sees The Bull standing there, as well as his parents, who sit and gaze at their son with both a strong and a pleading sense of despair. But the pupil has no idea what to say and has nothing to say, daring only to greet his parents, since everything is so serious, and only when The Bull says a firm goodbye with a stiff handshake, followed by the father bowing and the mother standing up, only when The Bull is finally gone does the ice begin to melt a little.
Just past the visitors room you reach another door that is sometimes closed, though if you go through it you end up in The Box itself, a long hallway stretching ahead, with a large window to the right that looks out onto the courtyard, while to the left are heavy wooden doors, each with a thick brown window installed in it with a pane that serves as a peephole through which one can look into the classroom if you have the key that opens this pane. At certain times these rooms are closed, each one labeled I through IX in Roman numerals, though Room V is always open, and usually you have to go through this room to get to the other rooms. Across from Room V is the main stairwell, which leads down to the courtyard and farther into the cellar, where the baths are located and the furnace room for the central heating, The Box being equipped with all the latest achievements of modern times, the coal bins also located below, as well as the pantry and other
rooms unknown to the pupils. If you climb back up the stairs to the hallway you’ll find toilets to the left and right, as well as on the second and third floors in the same location, these specially installed for The Box, with urinals like any other, though the stalls with the toilet bowls are white wooden cages that boast an open set of peepholes for both eyes, so that no one can hide in the stalls. Near the end of the passage, across from Classroom IX, a side stairwell leads to the laundry room, where each week you bring your dirty linens and pick up clean ones, while upstairs is the music room, where pupils practice while learning to play the violin or the piano. Down below, next to this set of stairs, is a little room where the pupils who are not doing well in school spend time each evening in order to study with The Paster, which is what they call Herr Pastor, The Paster looking over their assignments during study hall between three and five o’clock each day, except on Saturdays, The Paster walking back and forth across the classroom in order to keep an eye on his cadets, though each pupil can ask The Paster for help, which he receives straight off.