Play Safe (Make the Play #1) (9 page)

“Well, if you insist then there’s no reason to fight it.”

“Right?” Cal chuckles. “Miss Stubborn over here never changes her mind.”

I laugh too. It feels good to be bantering with the two of them. It almost makes me forget about everything that’s transpired over the past week.

Emmy sticks out her tongue at us.

“Very mature,” Cal teases her.

“I learn from the best.” She opens the back door and slides into the car.

After sitting down in the passenger seat, my gaze finds Emmy’s in the rearview mirror. When our eyes meet, she grins, giving me a subtle nod. And then I know why she gave me the front seat. She’s calling a truce.

I’ll gladly take it.

At first I wasn’t sure it was a good idea to ride with Cal this morning, but now I’m glad I did. I hated how things felt between Christian and me last night. It was weird and awkward, so unlike the way we are around each other. Being around Christian is usually as easy as breathing. I’ve known Christian most of my life. It’s hard to imagine my life before he was in it. I mean, I know there was a time when he wasn’t. I have vague memories from before he and his mom moved to Prairie Creek.

Most of them involved that annoying neighbor kid that Cal used to hang out with. Keith, I think his name was. He’s since moved, thank goodness. He liked giving me wedgies and pulling my hair. When I would complain about him Mom would shake her head and say that’s how boys show you they like you. I decided then and there that I never wanted a boy to like me.

My stance on that has since changed.

Although, sometimes it still feels that way.
Love hurts.
That’s what I keep learning, and I don’t like it one bit. Also, I don’t think it’s supposed to.

However, it seems to be the case when it comes to me. I’m always wanting the affection of someone who doesn’t want me back. It’s like the curse of being Emmy or something. Except for Cal. He’s the one person on this planet who I don’t have to perform for. He loves me no matter what. I used to think of Christian the same way, but things feel different now.

But I don’t want to fight with him. If I can’t have him the way I want to, then I want to go back to how things were. Back to when he was being all big-brotherly and protective. Back to when we joked and bantered like siblings. And this morning we’ve found that old rhythm. Cal turns on the radio and the boys sing along to some Bruno Mars song, crooning at the top of their lungs. It sounds like two dogs dying, but it makes me laugh so hard my stomach hurts.

It’s perfect. The best morning I’ve had in a long time.

As Cal pulls into the school parking lot, Christian belts out the last line in the song. I throw my head back, a stream of laughter spilling from my lips. Christian’s eyes catch mine in the rearview mirror, and he laughs too. I love this. This connection with Christian, where we can communicate without saying a word. It’s been like this since we were kids. One raised eyebrow or curve of our lips from across the room could convey so much. We perfected the art of speaking without words over the years, sitting across from each other at the dinner table. Even Cal has teased us about it. The two of them may be best friends, but there’s no denying our connection.

However, reality punches me in the gut when I see Josh standing a few feet away watching us. Christian’s face grows serious. I close my mouth, my laughter ceasing. The car quiets, tension returning.

Cal guides the car into a parking space, oblivious to what’s happening.

As I gather up my belongings, Cal and Christian exit the car. By the time I step outside, Christian is already across the lot. His back is to me, his shoulders rigid. He doesn’t even look back. Not even when Cal jogs toward him.

The moment is broken.

Or perhaps it was never there to begin with.

****

The cafeteria is already packed by the time Josh and I get there. Usually I walk to lunch with Ashley since she and I have the class before this together. But when we stepped out of math, Josh was waiting for me, leaning against the wall, one leg bent like he thought he was posing for an ad in a catalogue. And he did look good. So why didn’t I feel anything? In the past, Josh always had the capacity to make my heart skip a beat. One look, one smile, one touch is all it took to get my pulse racing. Now it’s like I’ve flat-lined. And it’s happening at the worst time. Josh is finally giving me the attention I’ve always longed for. Ashley can’t stop gushing about it. If only I could drum up the same excitement. Then again, Ashley’s always been pretty giddy about my relationship with Josh. She’s actually the one who introduced us. She was dating Chase at the time, and she was anxious for me to date a guy on the team so we could double.

When my gaze sweeps the room, I find Ashley sitting with the baseball team. It’s where we normally sit, and I know it’s where Josh is headed. It causes my stomach to tighten. As we near the table, I look over at Cal and Christian.

Before Ashley and I became friends I never sat with the baseball team. Not because I couldn’t. I knew Cal would be cool with it, but I never wanted to use my brother as a way to make friends. Besides, I felt like I should have a life separate from him. So I used to sit out in the quad with my former friends. I guess you can call them the nerds. Ashley does. But even though none of them like me anymore, I can’t call them that. It feels like a betrayal. Especially because deep down I know I belong more with them than I do here.

Often I feel like an imposter.

When Ashley spots me she leaps up. “Hey, girl.” Her blond hair swishes around her shoulders, the scent of her expensive perfume wafts through the air. She definitely belongs here. It was she who first dragged me to this table. I had hemmed and hawed, explaining that this was my brother’s turf, but she insisted I was being ridiculous. Her boyfriend at the time was at this table, and that made it as much ours as my brother’s, she said. So I followed just like always.

It’s what I’d gotten good at -following.

Ashley links her arm through mine and ushers me toward the table while whispering in my ear, “Oh, my gosh. Wasn’t that so romantic how Josh was waiting for you after class? I really think he feels bad about the other night. He’s like a changed man.”

She’s right. He is, and I can’t figure out why. Ashley may believe he has pure intentions, but I know better. Something’s up.

Ashley must sense my hesitation because she squeezes my arm tighter. “Don’t you think it’s romantic, Emmy?”

“Yeah.” I nod, and force a smile.

After we sit down, I notice Josh has already found a seat across the table with Chase and Nolan. I hate that I feel relief about it. He’s been practically attached to my hip all week, and I need some breathing room. It’s odd, because last week I wanted nothing more than for Josh to notice me, to put some effort into our relationship. Now that he has I want him to leave me alone.
Why is that
?

The minute my gaze floats to the other side of the table, I know exactly why it is. Christian’s head bobs up, his neck craning in my direction. Cheeks warming, I glance down at my hands. I seriously need to get a grip.

“Emmy, are you even listening to me?” Ashley’s voice cuts into my thoughts.

“Um…I’m sorry. What were you saying?” I return my focus to my best friend, attempting to abandon all thoughts of Christian. Of course that’s easier said than done. As hard as I try to listen to Ashley’s words, my mind keeps replaying my kiss with Christian. It’s the only thing I can think about lately. It consumes my thoughts day and night, and I wish it would stop. But when I hear the words “party” and “Friday night” I perk up.

“A baseball party?”

“Yeah. Aren’t you going?”

I bite my lip, my eyes flickering over to Josh. “I don’t know.”

“Oh, come on, you know he’s going to invite you.” She smiles. “And you’re going to invite me. Also, I know just the outfit you can borrow of mine.” Ashley’s always trying to dress me like I’m her own personal paper doll. Which is fine since she has a great sense of style. Not that mine is bad. I dress pretty cute most days. A lot cuter than I used to dress. Then again, everything I know about fashion I learned from Ashley.

“That sounds fun, but I’ll have to let you know.”

Ashley rolls her eyes and blows out a frustrated breath. Turning her head, she says, “Josh, you’re gonna invite Emmy to go with you to the party on Friday night, right?” My chest tightens. I’d never talk to Josh like that. Of course, if I did he’d probably embarrass me in front of the entire table. Ashley’s like that though. She’s pushy. Everyone knows it. That’s probably why she gets away with it. It’s also probably why she can’t keep a boyfriend.

“Of course.” Josh grins in my direction. “I was going to ask her later today, actually.”

“Sorry. Beat you to it.” Ashley throws him a wink before returning her attention to me. “See. Sometimes a girl’s gotta take action. It wouldn’t kill you to be a little more assertive.”

“I tried that last Friday night, remember? A lot of good it did me.”

“It did you a lot of good,” Ashley points out. “Josh has never been so into you.”

Is that the real reason Josh is acting like this? Is it because I finally stood up for myself? I assumed he liked when I was submissive, but maybe he doesn’t want a girlfriend who does everything he says. Maybe he has more depth than I thought. Hearing laughter, I glance over. Josh and his friends are throwing spitballs toward the band table.

So, clearly not. Clearly that was wishful thinking.

At the other end of the table Cal and Christian are hunched over in conversation, no doubt strategizing for their first scrimmage next week. I recognize the intense expression and strong set of Christian’s mouth. And I find myself wanting nothing more than to get up, walk over there and plant myself next to Christian. I want to take his face in my hands and kiss him the way he kissed me last weekend. I want to confess my feelings to him.

But I know that would be stupid on so many levels. So I stay planted in my seat, listening to Ashley drone on about the party on Friday night and faking smiles of adoration in my boyfriend’s direction.

Prairie Creek is full of open fields. As a kid I loved to ride my bike over the dirt mounds and race through the vast expanses of land. When I got a little older, Cal and I would go four-wheeling out in the country. Now the fields provide the perfect venue for parties. Out in the middle of nowhere we aren’t bothering anyone. The police don’t get called, parents don’t get mad about their house getting trashed. It’s a win-win.

Tonight’s party takes place on the outskirts of town at Old Willis’s Farm. Years ago, an old man named Fred Willis lived here. Legend has it that he tried to kill his wife when he found out she was cheating on him. After she ran off, he went bat-shit crazy and the whole town was afraid of him. When he died, the property was willed to his son who lives in New York. But by that time the house was a dump and he didn’t want it. Now it sits empty, rotting away. Most of the kids in town are still scared to go anywhere near this property. Some adults too. That’s why it’s the perfect location for a party. Lots of open space and an available barn if we need to take shelter.

Already there is a bonfire burning and a couple of kegs set up. Kids are everywhere, laughing, chatting, and making out. I weave through the crowd searching for Cal. We showed up together, but I lost him almost immediately when I started up a conversation with Palmer. It’s weird because we were talking about the scrimmage next week and normally Cal’s all about baseball. But he’s been acting off all night.

When I find Cal he’s lip-locked with some strange brunette. I wonder if this is the mysterious Melissa he’s always raving about. I’ve yet to meet his college girlfriend, and sometimes I tease him that she must be fictional. He doesn’t like that very much. Once Cal and the mystery girl come up for air, I instantly recognize her.
Nope. Not Melissa.

“Hey, you know Gabby, right?” Cal points to the brunette.

“Yeah, I think we had science together last year.”

She nods. “I think so.” Her voice is odd, all high-pitched and squeaky. Even worse than Ashley’s, and that’s saying something.

When Gabby goes to get a drink, I yank Cal aside. “What about Melissa?”

“What about her?” Cal is already slurring his words. I notice two red Solo cups on the ground near where he was sitting with Gabby. That’s not a good sign. He must be slamming them down. Guess I’m driving us home. Usually Cal’s the responsible one.

“Well, what if she finds out you’re at some party making out with another girl?” He may be drunk, but I need him to see reason. Even though I’ve never met Melissa, I know he’s really into her.

“She won’t give a rat’s ass.” He waves away my words with a shaky hand. “In fact, she’s probably at some college party doing some frat boy.”

Understanding washes over me. “So you guys broke up?’

Frowning, he nods.

“I’m sorry, man.”

Cal shakes his head. “I’m not. I’m glad. Now I can be with whoever I want whenever I want. I don’t have to be tied down to one girl. This stallion,” He points to himself, “needs to roam free.”

“Okay.” I place a hand on his arm. “Let’s reign it in their, horse boy.” Rarely do I see “Drunk Cal” and it’s pretty entertaining. But he’s still my best friend, and I’ve always got his back. Tonight, having is back means making sure he doesn’t make a fool of himself.

Gabby returns and Cal’s all over her again.
Oh well.
That’ll probably keep him out of trouble. Or at least keep him entertained. And, really, it’s the best way to get his mind off of Melissa.

“Hey, Christian,” a flirty female voice interrupts my thoughts.

I turn around, coming face-to-face with a pretty dark-haired girl. It takes a minute for me to remember that we’ve met before.

“Selena, right?”

She smiles. “You remembered?”

“Of course.” Glancing back at Cal, I realize that he has the right idea. If Gabby can help him get over Melissa, then maybe Selena can help me get over Emmy. “You alone?” I ask her.

Her grin deepens. “Yeah. You?”

“Yep.” A cool breeze whisks over my skin.

“I guess it’s my lucky day.” She shivers, and I place an arm around her shoulders.

“I guess it is.” I guide her forward. “Can I get you a drink?”

“Sure.” She nestles in closer as we head toward the kegs.

Hayes is standing near the kegs passing out red Solo cups. He helps me pour beer into two of them. I don’t know Hayes that well. He’s a year younger than Cal and me, but he’s a damn good hitter. Left handed too. He got pulled up to varsity last year when he was only a sophomore. At first I wasn’t sure about him. Mostly because he was always making jokes and being goofy. But the first time I saw him hit the ball, all of my doubts vanished. He’s the real deal.

“Have fun, man.” He winks at me as Selena and I turn away from the keg, both of us fisting our filled cups. The bitter scent of beer fills my senses.

“I will,” I assure him.

Lowering her head, Selena blushes. She really is pretty with her dark skin and long silky hair. Not only that, but she’s got a great body.

“So, you ready for your first scrimmage this week?” She asks, surprising me.

“You know our schedule?”

She shrugs, daintily sipping her beer. Foam coats her lips and she licks it off slowly. She’s no novice. My insides flip. “Our whole team does.”

“Oh, that’s right. You play softball.”

“Second year on varsity.” She smiles proudly.

Pretty and a softball player.
Where has she been all my life?
She saunters toward a large tree looming overhead and leans her back against it. I prop one of my hands against the rough bark and am about to take a swallow of my beer when I remember how inebriated Cal is. Lowering the beer, I sigh. I could’ve really used it to take the edge off. After I set it on the ground I glance at Selena, and she bats her eyelashes at me. Then again, maybe I don’t need alcohol tonight.

When her eyes meet mine, she smiles, and I know it’s an invitation. I don’t think I even needed one. The chick’s been sending me signals from the minute we started talking. However, I can’t shut off the manners my mom’s taught me over the years. Lowering my head, I angle my face toward hers. She holds her beer near her waist and raises her chin. Our lips almost touch when I see Emmy. She’s walking in my direction holding Josh’s hand. Ashley saunters beside her, her gaze bouncing around as if she’s looking for someone. Which I’m sure she is. Probably looking for her latest victim. Josh peers over at Emmy and says something that makes her giggle. And it’s all I can take. Closing my eyes, I press my lips to Selena’s.

As she kisses me back, I do my best to lose myself in her so I can forget about the one girl I can’t stop thinking about. The one girl I can’t have.

The only girl I really want.