Removing the Mask (9 page)

Ida sits with her legs crossed in front to the mirror, brushing her hair. Turns out, there’s a reason to why her hair is so frizzy; with every tug of the brush, I can clearly hear her hair breaking. Her hair is really pretty; she just obviously doesn’t know how to care for curly hair.    

When I hear the brush rip through yet another knot, I just can’t take it any longer.

“Oh my god! Ida, please stop torturing your hair!” I cover my face with my hands.

She turns to look at me, “what’re you talking about? I’m brushing my hair.” She says it innocently and is clearly oblivious.

“No, you’re
shredding
your hair. Your hair is really pretty but, it’s frizzy because you brush it like that. And it’s curly too so it’s probably twice the size because you’ve separated all the curls.”

She stares at me like I’ve just spoken in Japanese. 

I sigh inwardly, “Ida, will you let me do your hair?” 

She seems slightly hesitant but nods. I know I can’t waste any time and get her to sit in my desk chair while I plug in Bessie’s curling iron. It’s too late to save her curls and there isn’t enough time to curl he whole head of hair as there’s so much of it, so I braid her hair so it wraps around the back of her head from one side, before coming over to rest on her shoulder; because her hair so beautifully thick, it’s a nice fat braid. I use bobby pins to hold in pieces that aren’t long enough to hold all the way through. Finally I use the curling wand to curl her bangs and spray her hair with hairspray.

“There! Done! What do you think?” I study my handy work and can’t help but frown upon a few red little splotches upon her face, and from the way she fingers them, I can see they bother her as well.

“Let me cover them. Here put some of this on.”  I hand her a pot of moisturiser before grabbing a set of clothes out of the wardrobe, and running to the bathroom to change.

She’s sitting in the chair when I come back. I catch her glancing at the clock nervously as she fingers the bottom of her braid.

“Thanks for doing this Kenzie, it looks great. Usually I just put it back in a ponytail.”

“It’s alright. It looks great, really cute.”

She gives a shy smile. “We better hurry.”

“Yeah, sit still and we’ll be out the door in five.”

True to my word, I’ve done her foundation and made her eyes wider with a little mascara.

“Okay, that’s me done. You have two minutes to do yourself.”

“No! I don’t wear loads of makeup. Let’s go!” I grab my phone and purse, stuffing them roughly into my pockets. When I turn, Ida’s staring at me with a scowl on her face, and her little arms crossed.

“What? What’s wrong?” An alarm goes off in my head;
did I do something to hurt her feelings?

“Do your makeup; I want to see what you look like with yourself all dolled up.” There’s no softness about her stare, she’s made her mind up and doesn’t seem to show any sign of backing down.

“You’re going to make us both late!”

“Don’t worry! Do your damn makeup!” 

My eyebrows shoot up; I didn’t think she had that in her vocabulary. I look at the clock and then the weather outside; rain and wind. Wincing, I grab the essentials out my makeup bag before turning to the mirror.

“If you get dug out for being late, you can’t blame me.”

We stumble into the bakery. I run round the counter to bag her a sausage roll. I only notice Jimmy’s standing by the counter when he taps the beak of my hat. He nods his head in greeting but doesn’t say anything. I know something’s wrong when I smile and he doesn’t return it.

“Hey, what’s up?” I hand Ida her breakfast and in return she gives me the money.

“See you later Kenzie, I gave you my number right?” She lingers in the bakery door.

“Yeah, I’ll tie up with you at some point.”

She smiles at me before dashing out into the typical British weather.

I turn back to Jimmy; he shakes his head glumly before turning away. “Don’t worry
McKenzie, I’m fine.”

Unease settles uncomfortably in my stomach as I watch him walk out the bakery’s door. He almost never calls be by my full name, I’m always Ken.

Dashing back round the counter, I hurl myself back out into the drizzly weather and run up to where Jimmy walks with sagged shoulders. I grab onto the sleeve of his blazer and spin him round.

“Why are mad at me? What have I done?” My eyes squint as the water blows into my eyes.

He pulls me under the awning or the DIY shop next to the bakery; the material flaps violently under the harsh wind. “You wouldn’t come out with me and my friends last night but when Bessie offered to have Ida over, you said yes, why? Why don’t you want to hang out with me?”

“Jimmy, you know what I’m like, I don’t do loads of friends and I’ll tell you why later, but having Ida over last night made me want to change that-” He goes to interrupt me but I hold my hand up to stop him. “-We can hash it all out later but the reason I said yes to having Ida over last night was to stop Bessie taking the puppies with her. She didn’t want me staying home without you, so I agreed to have Ida over. Please don’t be mad at me lil’ Jim.” I plead.

“Fine, but you’re explaining it to me when we get home.” He grumbles.

I smile wide before grabbing him in hug. “Get to school slacker, I’ll save you
a muffin for after school.” I turn quickly before legging it back to the bakery. A glance over my shoulder reveals that Jimmy’s managed to crack a smile.

I’m shivering when I shuffle back inside. After dumping my wet coat and my hoodie under the counter, I walk back to the kitchen to find Eloise drizzling white icing over pinwheels.

“Good Morning.” She greets me cheerfully.

I want to inform her that so far it hasn’t been the best but keep it to myself. “Morning. What would you like me to do boss?”

She smiles warmly; for some strange reason I’ve found she’s taken an unusual liking to me. “You can stock the front counter with them cakes.” She nods to the counter closest to me against the wall, the one laden with sugar delights.

“Cool. D’ you mind if I save a couple cakes for a friend after school? I’ll put the money in the till.”

“Yeah you can save a few cakes, but you don’t have to pay; a bonus of having this job.” She winks with a smile.

“Thanks Eloise.” I give a bright smile; I don’t have to force it though, it comes naturally.    

I turn to grab a tray of cakes but turn when Eloise says my name.

“Oh! And McKenzie, I like the makeup.” The old girl winks at me before turning to ice a few remaining cupcakes. I look at myself in the reflective surface of my iPod,
yeah me too.

Around two o’clock Eloise dismissed me, but asks I come back around four to handle the rush of students coming from school. She says she has a birthday order that’s rather large and doesn’t want to muck it up because she’s worried about customers, she doesn’t want to close the shop early either, which means I’m her saviour.

I arrive back at the bakery just before four, after scoping out the surrounding area. I walk in and instantly know something’s wrong with Eloise when I see the strain on her face. Ducking behind the counter quickly, I stash my coat before donning my apron.

“Something wrong Eloise?” I ask tentatively; I don’t want to be putting my nose where it doesn’t belong.

“You know I was working on that cake, the big one with the teddy bear on?” She asks wincing.

“Yeah.” I say cautiously.

“I dropped it,” she says shamefully. “I need to make another so could you stay till closing time? It’s okay if you can’t, if you have plans or something, but I would really appreciate it! And I’ll even pay you extra!” She says desperately.

My stomach takes the plunge as I look at her; she really needs my help, but I promised I’d talk to Jimmy tonight and he doesn’t know this but I was thinking about getting him to invite his friends round to make up for last night.

“Sure, of course I’ll stay and help as much as I can.” Jimmy isn’t going to be happy. 

She practically melts with relief, “Oh! Thank you McKenzie! I need to get to work!” She gushes before hurrying through the kitchen doors, completely oblivious to my torment. 

The first thing I do is text Bessie asking for a ride after work before starting to text Jimmy, I’m just finishing when a mother and her two daughters come through the door. I shove my phone into my pocket before greeting them with a bright cheery smile.
This is going to be a long night.

***

All the way home, Bessie and I sit in comfortable silence. I’m grateful because not only am I tired from my busy day, but I’m worried about Jimmy; is he going to be mad at me?

When we do get home, Jimmy is nowhere to be seen, though Bessie assures me he’s home tonight. I don’t even see or hear him when I’m going all the way up to my room.

I don’t waste time and jump straight into the shower to loosen my stiff muscles from being on my feet all day. I change quickly into pyjamas before running down the stairs to Jimmy’s room with a box clutched in my hands. The wood of the uncovered stairs is cool against the balls of my feet and I feel myself enjoying the sensation after my warm shower.

Jimmy’s door is open; when I peek in he’s lying on the bed, a book balanced precariously in his hand.

Without hesitating, I walk up to the bed before chucking the box lightly at him. “Open it.”

He takes his time bookmarking the page and sitting up Indian style before taking the lid off the reveal the hardback book and the mask.

“What is this?”

I can’t help but feel irked about the slight hint of disinterest in his voice. “This is the reason I’m like the way I am
, though I’m going to try to change that.”

“A badly written book and drama mask is the reason you don’t want to hang out with me and my friends?”

“Well, I wrote that badly written book and I wear that drama mask.” I wait to see how he reacts but he just keeps watching me, waiting to see if I’m actually serious or just going to burst out “just kidding!”

“The reason I’m not overly friendly is because I thought I had the best group of friends ever but, when I started missing school and never told them why, or if I couldn’t hang out with them, they got mad and ditched me. Sure, they talk to me every now and then, but I wouldn’t call them friends anymore. One second I have all these mates that I spend the majority of my time with, the next I’m alone completely. I got depressed and when I did, Poppy stepped in and became the closest friend I’ve ever had, but then
she stopped texting and calling. I only heard from her a few days ago, first time in like, three months. I don’t trust easily, I just don’t want history to repeat itself and what you’re asking of me is bigger than you perceive it to be.”

Jimmy’s eyes dart behind me and I glance to find Bessie watching me with warm eyes.

“That’s a lot to take in.” He says slowly as he stares at me with wider eyes than usual. “By the way, that book, it’s not that bad.”

I laugh nervously. “Don’t worry, you’re forgiven for calling my book bad, but do you understand now?”

He nods. “I still want you to meet my friends though, I don’t know who you hung out with but I know my friends won’t do that.”

I swallow before nodding, “okay, but only because I trust you.”

“Good.” He watches me for a minute, “where’s my muffin?” When he cracks a smile I can’t help but admire him for keeping cool with all this. 

“Downstairs. When do you want me to meet your friends?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Great.” I say, but not as enthusiastic as him.

I sit on my bed the next day, feeling sick to my stomach. A war wages inside of me, part of me knows that meeting them and breaking through the bubble I’ve built around me is a good thing, but the other part; the preserving part, is telling me to blow it off and protect myself, to learn from the past.  

I’m so lost in my thoughts that a knock on the door makes me jump. Mentally telling myself to man up as I get up, I ask who it is.

“It’s Bessie. Your dad’s here with your stuff.” She tries opening the door, but the lock keeps her out. “Ken, are you okay in there?”

“Yeah! Give me a sec.” Crossing the room, I turn the antique looking key, listening to the lock click back. I retreat back as she steps in the room, a dent of worry in the forehead.

“What’s wrong?” She sits down beside me on my bed.

“I’m nervous, that’s all. I’m doing the right thing right? Meeting Jimmy’s
gang.
God, I mean gosh!” I freeze, my mind going to Ida when she slept over. Sure, it was awkward at first but then it was easy, talking, laughing and being myself without a… mask. There was no mention of M Z Pristine and her book, my book. It was just two teenagers hanging out and horsing around watching cliché movies and then laughing about them.    

The acid churning in my stomach calms slightly as my mind works through it. My thoughts almost working like an alkali tablet. I can do this.

“McKenzie?” Bessie, having watched me work through my troubled mind, stares with a slightly worried look on her face.

“No. I mean yes. Um, I’m fine.”

She doesn’t look convinced but lets it slide. “Okay then, let’s go and help your dad with your stuff. I know Jimmy is anxious to leave at two o’clock.”

I nod, though my head’s still far away. 

I watch as dad drives back down the dirt track that leads to the house. It’s just as he’s disappearing out of sight that I remember; I forgot to ask him what mum’s deal is, why she insists on me being M Z Pristine. Before I can get really annoyed, Jimmy is beside me, his presence demanding my attention.

“You want to leave now? We’re meeting at Jasmine’s house; we might go see a movie later so make sure you have money okay?” His enthusiasm is enough for both of us.

“Yeah, let me go change and grab my stuff.” I jog up the two flights of stairs trying to get the nervous and jittery energy to exit out my feet. It doesn’t work.

I change out my jogging bottoms and into jeans before grabbing a lumberjack shirt to go over my long sleeved top. I’m shoving my feet into my sneakers when my reflection in the mirror catches my eye. I stare at my bare face and in a way I can’t help but think it’s taunting me. I reach for my makeup bag and go through the motions of foundation to cover my pink cheeks, mascara, eyeliner and finally, I paint my lips a dark red to go with my shirt. This is
my
mask, the old one, the difference being I’m myself with this one. A sense of determination settles on me as I head to the door with my phone and wallet in hand.   

When my foot hits the bottom step, Jimmy comes out the sitting room.

“We’re going to walk down to Josh’s house; his dad is going to give us a lift to Jasmine’s.” He hands me my coat.

“Where is Josh’s house? Bye Bessie!” I ask before hollering to Bessie who I can hear moving around in the kitchen.

“Bye guys!” I hear her reply as the back door opens and closes, most likely behind her.

“It’s up our lane and then across the road, Josh’s dad owns the farm across from ours.” He says as he tosses a set of door keys at me, I catch them one handed before slipping them inside my pocket and zipping it close. They’re the last thing we need to lose.

I walk beside a sauntering Jimmy and can’t help but notice how happy he is. “Why are you so happy?” I kick one of the larger stones that cover the drive way and watch it dance across the ground before disappearing into a bush off to the side.

“I just know this is going to be good. Is it a bad thing that I’m happy? Aren’t I always?” His smile lights up his whole face.

Something occurs to me as we reach the bottom of our lane. “Is Josh the guy from the Skype page?” I find myself holding my breath.

“Yeah, why?”

I come to a halt and grab hold of his arm to stop him. “I’ve met him before, we just never exchanged names.”

His eyebrows twitch in surprise. “Where did you meet him and should I be worried?”

“The school here played against my old one last week, I…bumped into him in the park he was playing at and yeah that’s it.” I say shrugging.

“That’s it?” He asks dubiously.

“Totally.” I lie through my teeth.

He watches me for a moment before chuckling. “Whatever you say Ken.” We share a smile before crossing the road and heading up the driveway. All of a sudden I find myself extremely self-conscious and catch myself casually checking my makeup and appearance in the reflection of the car window, like I didn’t just do my makeup.

Thankfully Jimmy is oblivious and continues to walk up the driveway. I lengthen my stride to catch up with him and take a deep breath as he knocks on the door; I try to calm my racing heart as what I’m about to do hits me.

Jimmy seems to notice and bumps his shoulder into mine. “Don’t worry; they’re going to love you.”

I can only nod as the door opens. A guy that looks to be Josh’s brother answers the door, he looks to be the same age so I’m guessing he’s a non-identical twin and from the photo’s hanging on the walls, I’m right.  

“You alright Jimmy?” He steps aside to let us in; I catch him eyeing me as I step forward though I pretend I don’t notice.

“Yeah I’m good. Jason this is McKenzie, she’s my cousin. You coming with us to Jaz’s?”

“Hi McKenzie,” he smiles at me, his eyes catching mine.
Oh no.

“Hi,” I glance at Jimmy slightly unsure, “So are you coming with us?” I ask slipping my hands into my pockets.

“Yeah, hope you don’t mind,” rather than this being aimed at Jimmy, he looks to me as he says it.

“Naw, it’s cool.” Jimmy says reclaiming the conversation. When Jason looks away, Jimmy shoots me a look that clearly says
“is he for real?”
I have to muffle a burst of laughter.

“Hey Jim. Give me a sec’ to grab my train…”
He
stops halfway down the stairs staring at me with a slightly disbelieving look on his face. “No way.” He says slowly as he shakes his head.

“Small world huh?” I offer.

He nods. “Yeah, I’ll say. So you’re McKenzie?” 

“One and only. And you’re Josh?” I ask even though I know he is.

“Yep.” He looks away looking extremely amused as he comes down the other half of the stairs. He retrieves a pair of black trainers out from under the stairs before shoving his feet into them. When he stands, he nods towards the door. “Let’s get a move on then,” he says grabbing his coat.

***

The car ride is full of Jason’s overly interested questions, even when I try to start up conversation with Jimmy; who sits beside me and Josh who sits up front with his dad, he is trying to capture my attention again, and not wanting to be rude, I give it to him. 

As soon as the car stops I’m ushering Jimmy out the car and after making sure no one can hear, I whisper “help me out!”

He laughs while shaking his head. “Sorry cuz’, you’re on your own.”

My eyes jump to see if anyone heard, before leaning close again to speak into his ear. “Help me or I’ll tell them your middle name.” I threaten sweetly.

His eyes narrow and his lips tighten slightly before he relents. “Fine! Go talk to Josh, I’ll ward off Jace.”

“Thank you!” I give him a quick hug before lingering at the front of the car, waiting for Josh to finish talking to his dad.

When his dad heads back towards the car, I realise he’s leaving. My minds races to remember Josh’s and Jason’s second name. “Mr…Whittington?”

He smiles at me, “yes?”

“Thank you for the ride.” I gesture to the car with a shy smile.

“You’re welcome.” With that he gets in the car and pulls out of the driveway of what I assume is Jasmine’s house. 

Josh notices Jimmy and Jason talking and comes over to stand by me. “Big change huh? Moving here and getting a job and stuff.”

I quirk an eyebrow and he looks away. “How’d you know?”

“I uh… heard Bessie talking to my dad; they’re good friends. Bessie was talking about you and all the stuff that’s different for you.” He looks towards the ground obviously embarrassed, while rubbing the back of his head.

“You eavesdropped.” I say, a smile tugging at my lips. Other circumstances and I would be extremely uncomfortable, but I’m curious.     

“No! I
overheard
.” There’s playfulness in his eyes that draws me in.

“You eavesdropped. Why?” I challenge him with my eyes and he smiles as he glances behind me.

“All we’ve heard before you arrived was you! Jimmy was
so
excited. I was curious. Big shocker when it turns out we’ve already met huh?”

Jimmy comes up beside me followed by Jason. “Now that’s a story I want to hear!” He grins at me and I roll my eyes.

“Are we going to stand out here like a load of lemons or are you going to introduce me to the rest?” I ask Jimmy.

“Eager are we?” He teases as we start making our way up the driveway. Jason goes ahead and I end up with Jimmy on one side and Josh on the other.  

“No, cold!” I hold up my hands, which have turned bone white.

Jimmy just laughs as we go through the front door.

A girl talking to Jason catches my attention; she’s slim and has light brown hair cropped short to suit her delicate face. Her almond eyes go to me and her smile lights up her face. “Hi! I’m Jasmine.” She holds her hand out for me to shake and I hesitate slightly before shaking her slim hand. She’s like a doll.

“McKenzie, you can call me Ken.” I say suddenly extremely nervous.

“Okay.” Her attention turns to Jimmy and her smile changes in a way I can’t read until she speaks to him.

“Hey Jimmy.”

My smile is natural when I realise she has is bad. She’s crushing on my cousin, and it’s so painfully obvious. I don’t blame the girl though, Jimmy’s graced with clear skin, strong features and his hair, like Bessie’s, is dark brown and wavy; though he gels it most of the time.

As well as the hair, we share the same startling green eyes, so we could pass as brother and sister. They’re in my opinion my best feature; the rest of me is average, that comes in handy when you want to blend, though with Jason’s silent gaze on me, I don’t feel so average. 

Leaving her to it, I turn and hang up my coat next to the guy’s. Jimmy and Jasmine are deep in conversation so I leave them and follow the twins into the other room. Lingering in the doorway, I get a lot of curious looks. Josh pats the sofa beside him, “Relax Ken, they don’t bite unless you ask.” He grins and I have to roll my eyes before sitting down beside him.

“Right! That’s Amanda and JJ; you can tell them apart by the hair, JJ’s  is always down, Amanda’s is always up. Kyle is the one on the end of the sofa. That’s Dustin and finally, definitely the worst, you have Bradley with the black hair and habit of saying crap. Until you get to know him better, you won’t know the difference, so just assume.” He says sending Bradley a slightly obnoxious look. 

“Thanks, that’s really nice, but I’d look in the mirror mate.” Bradley says with a hint of an Australian accent as he scowls at Josh. I see the strain between them and can’t help but be curious about what put it there.

I glance at Jason and find that his gaze is on Bradley and it’s far from friendly. I look at Josh out the corner of my eye and find him looking at me.  

“It’s nice to meet you guys.” I allow myself to relax back into the sofa, hoping everyone will do the same and find myself fiddling with my hair as I watch them.

“It’s nice to finely meet you. Jimmy was
so
excited.” Amanda says with huge smile that makes her eyes twinkle.

“I keep hearing that a lot.”  I say embarrassed as I look down at the sofa cushion.

“We were with him when Bessie sent the text that said you were going to move in; we thought you were a guy because he called you Ken, it wasn’t until JJ asked what you looked like and he showed us a photo, that we realised that Ken’s short for Kenzie.” Amanda says watching amused as JJ yawns wide enough to swallow a bus before resting her head on her twin’s shoulder. Looking at them together, they’re both really pretty with their wild ginger hair and freckles; it’s the two of them together though, that makes me admire them. 

I hate being called Kenzie, but I don’t say anything afraid of coming off picky or touchy.

Jimmy choses to walk in with Jasmine, he sits down beside me forcing me to move up closer to Josh so we can all sit more comfortably, well, as comfortable as you can be with three people on a two seat sofa. Jasmine hesitates before going to squeeze on with Bradley and Dustin.

“Are we going to see a movie? I know White Eyes is playing at
three-twenty.”  Jasmine asks as she casts her questioning gaze across everyone.