ROMAN (Lane Brothers Book 5) (7 page)

She kept talking about my family, the parents I lost, and the destiny I’ve been ignoring for years while under the Lanes’ thumbs. At that point, I was just so relieved to be in with the woman that I hugged her back and even found myself smiling happily.

That gave me pause, and I began to doubt that I’m still a good guy.

Now with the phone ringing, I’m not sure I should answer it.

I do, and immediately start crying when Miah’s voice greets my ears.

“You’ve taken long enough to finally answer, asshole,” he snarls, not bothering to greet or acknowledge me in any way.

I understand his fury right now, and if our situations were reversed I’d cuss him out and find a way to kick his ass to hell and back, before hugging the heck out of him, of course.

Miah and I are best friends and have been since his parents took me in as one of their own. And when he finds out how this all came about and why he was handed this case in the first place, he’ll be even more pissed.

When my family finally knows the truth, there’s a chance I may lose them.

“Bro—”

“No. Don’t go that route with me, Roman. You’re walking a thin edge here and what’s worse is you’re making it so that the rest of us walk it, too, even if you didn’t want it that way. You need to get your ass home, and we need to come at this op from a different angle, Roman.”

I’ve always believed that we needed to have someone on the inside in a top position, calling some of the shots.

I’m so close, so Goddamned close I can taste it.

“No. I’ve almost—”

“She’s pregnant, you ass.”

His words shut me down instantly, and I feel my entire purpose in life make a drastic shift in the opposite direction. I don’t question him, because I think a part of me knew that I’d filled her the last time we were together.

I had prayed that I hadn’t left the woman I love with my child when I knew that I could die and leave her to raise him alone.

Even as the shock ripples through me, I feel elation unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before. This is a happiness that’s indescribable.

And yet I feel the danger of it, too, because if anyone should find out, they’d go for her so fast that Miah and Jared wouldn’t know what happened.

“Keep her locked inside that house and out of this till I get home.”

“No. That’s your job, and if you ain’t here to do it, bro…well then that’s on you. I’m not doing another Goddamned thing or taking another order from you till you tell me what the fuck is going on and why you did what you did to Dobson.”

And there I hear it, the recrimination I knew to expect from Miah. The man is a good friend and a better brother, but to him there is never a time when the ends justify the means, I can’t quite blame him for his attitude.

“I didn’t,” I say, watching the door to my room in case Dyson decides to take another one of his midnight strolls as he’s been doing of late.

I sleep, when I can manage it, with an eye and ear open because something tells me that Dyson and Cleo haven’t fallen for my act as they tried to get me to believe.

“What the hell are you talking about? Of course you did. I saw your calling card myself.”

“And I’m telling you it wasn’t me.”

The silence that follows is deafening before I hear Miah start cursing and what sounds like Jared’s yell and a feminine squeal. When he finally gets back with me I hear a keyboard clicking and I smile at the thought of Jared’s dark scowl and the way his hair would be standing on end while he types furiously.

“You know what that means. Whoever the SEAL mole is—”

“I already took care of the mole and Williams, so try again, bro.”

“Christ, Roman. Get the hell back home before someone kills you. This shit ain’t worth me having to hold your girl up as we lower you into the ground, man. Please.”

“And then what? The last member of the secret council gets away and starts all over again in a few months? Nah, man, I haven’t worked this hard and risked it all just to walk away when I’m this close, Miah.”

If I thought I could forgive myself for it, I’d run home as fast as I could and spend the next few hours just holding Mel in my arms.

I want that so badly, I can hardly breathe for the lump of fear lining my throat, but I can’t. I can’t let it go and have this hanging over our heads indefinitely.

I now have a kid to consider, and by God, my child will be born free of fear and the thought that one day someone could come for those I love.

“It’s better to have you walk out of there than to have to pull your dead body out, Roman. For God’s sake, be reasonable. It’s not just you anymore, bro. You have Mellie and your baby to think of, too. Come home, Roman. Just come home.”

“I can’t. I have one last name to get the senator and then I’ll be home free,” I mutter, hanging my head with a weariness untouched by the happiness I still feel.

“The senator?”

Roman

Shit, that was not something I wanted to tell him yet.

This is his interrogation technique. He starts off hard and disarms you with personal shit so that he can spring a trap on you. The fact that I fell for it shows that I’m running on empty and in danger of blowing this op if I don’t step it up.

Fuck
.

“I called Melissa’s uncle Jim and he agreed to get the intel I collect back to the CIA. They’re our only good bet right now and—”

“Roman, Senator Dobson is one of them. Even Mel thinks so.”

Jesus, of course they would think that because I told the man to keep his nose clean and stay away from this on the public front. He’s only following my orders.

“He isn’t.”

“Yeah, he is. He’s refusing to help even though the chief was killed.”

“He’s refusing to help because I didn’t want it getting around that he’s feeding the intel to one of my guys in the agency, Miah,” I admit, closing my eyes as he stays silent and starts thinking.

Miah and I know each other too well. I know that even now, he’s putting it all together and coming up with answers I didn’t want him to find out this way.

“Are, are you telling me this has all been an op from the get-go? Are you seriously fucking telling me that you’ve been playing us all from the start?! It was you who took this op to my unit?” he yells, making me wince.

Miah isn’t a yeller, so I know he’s pissed and feels too betrayed.

“I’m telling you that I’ve been following this case for four years, and no matter what we did, we could never get a hint as to who was behind the shootings or bombings that we were investigating. Sheer dumb luck turned up one name, Dobson’s, and I took it from there. When I couldn’t get in, I asked Jim to call in a favor and have you put on it. I needed you and the boys shaking the apple tree, and I needed Lynn to make a move, even though at that point I only had a vague suspicion of her activities.”

At that point, the investigation had already been going on so long without progress that my superiors were threatening to shut us down. I had no choice and only really made my move once I heard Dobson’s name.

The rest of it was pure supposition that I was relieved to find was true. Otherwise I would have had nothing. Luckily for me, my brothers are tenacious assholes and they got the Patriots scrambling so hard and fast, we couldn’t miss the activity.

“You liar. You used us all to get into something you knew,
know
is likely going to get you killed. When did this all start?”

“Look—”

“Fuck. This started before… What about poor Wyatt? Did you manipulate his life, too, after everything him and Ellie have been through?”

“Poor Wyatt? He got to Ellie, thanks to me, and it all turned out really well in the end. As I see my move saved her.”

“What move?”

“I had Jerry put the idea into Lynn’s head that Ellie was a liability to her. The crazy idiot is so paranoid already, she ate it up and just barrelled ahead. When she got pinched and they all started scrambling to close the gap, I got Cleo.”

“Wait, this doesn’t make sense. How did you know it was Lynn in the first place?”

“Jerry. Jerry has always been my inside guy,” I admit, grinning when I hear him curse and start muttering obscenities.

“Christ, did it have to be him? I hate that guy.”

“Yeah? Well try having to figure out if the man is just crazy or spinning you a line. It took me months to trust him, and believe me, he’s not the easiest to work with on an op because he’s jumpy as hell,” I mutter.

I love the guy and thank God for him every day, but I won’t be sorry when this is over and we can part ways.

“Dammit, Roman. They all know who and what you are if what you’re telling me adds up.”

“Yea.”

“Get out. We can rework your plans. Cleo’s gone nuts since she woke up and couldn’t get to Paulie.”

I grin when I hear harsh voices exchanging unpleasant words, followed by the sounds of Miah and Jared scuffling.

“Hey, bro. You do your biggest little brother a favor and take that woman out before she makes a play for Paulie again.”

Oh, Jared, always the bloodthirsty one and yet the gentlest man I have ever met.

“Sorry, bro, no can do. I want the name of the top dog in this thing, and with Lynn unavailable it’s Cleo on the block.”

“Dammit, Miah, that hurt! Stop.”

I hear more cursing and then Miah is back, letting me know how unimpressed he still is with me.

“I’ll find Lynn. Case is still on her ass, and last I heard she was hiding somewhere in South America. You just do what you can quickly and get home before your woman starts getting nastier than she has been thus far.”

“Dude, keep your nuts covered if you know what’s good for you. Look, I gotta go.”

“And then what, Roman? You stop answering your phone and don’t call? Again. You have to be smarter about this. It’s no use getting the last name if you aren’t alive to tell anyone,” he says darkly.

“I won’t—”

“And she’s hurting. Mellie is hurting real bad right now, bro. Your woman needs you more than she’ll let anyone know, but I can’t miss her red-rimmed eyes or the way she keeps staring at Pop with her heart all over the place. She needs you, Roman.”

Fuck.

“I’ll get out for one night. That’s all I can promise. Is that break in the perimeter still there?”

“Yeah. Bronx wired it, though, so step lightly and do not walk in a straight line if you can help it. I’ll let him know you’ll be in sometime this week.”

“Thanks. Miah, I—”

“Not yet. We’ll talk when I can beat your ass for this shit.”

“In your dreams. I gotta go.”

I end the call with a heavy heart, knowing that I may not be capable of keeping the promise I just made, but needing it just as much as I’ve needed anything in my life.

I’m not a wuss and I’ve never been one to allow emotions to rule my life, but if Mel needs me, I will find a way to get to her.

***

Melissa

The call with Uncle Dobs was a weird one, to say the least. If I hadn’t been informed by Miah that the poor man is innocent, I would have totally sneered at the obvious tears he kept crying on the phone.

Talk about awkward, trying to comfort a man you suspected of treason not twenty-four whole hours ago. The I’d fought my own tears when he kept saying over and over again that he should have just helped Daddy when he called, but he was terrified of getting involved because there were rumors that he was going to be investigated at one point.

The excuse and his obvious remorse do nothing to kill my anger for the man, but he’s

all I have left. With the way things are going in my relationship, I can’t say I’m about to count Roman as a part of my little family yet.

Not till he tells me he loves me and swears to commit to me more than to his stupid job.

Now Dobs is on the way and I’m headed over to my father’s house to clean up and get the place ready for sale. I also have to get his ashes from the funeral home and see the lawyer, but for now, I just want one minute of peace to consider what my next steps will be.

Jared is right, and though this morning’s conversation during the car ride to the bar wasn’t great for my anger, I’ve considered Miah and Jared’s advice and I’ve decided to step back and let Roman have at this without my interference.

I have problems of my own and a kid to consider.

I’m doing something the old me would applaud, something I never would have considered until Jared let me know very honestly that I belong to the Lane family as much as I do to myself or Roman, specifically.

No matter what, I will never be alone again.

I feel so much better after having someone reassure me of that. In fact, I feel so good that when I looked up a half hour ago and saw Fin, one of Will’s guys, staring at me in a weird way, I didn’t even acknowledge it.

“Hey, Melissa, you sweet little angel, how about coming on over here and talking to an old man,” Lonnie yells from the end of the bar, throwing Fin a look hot enough to peel his skin clean off his bones.

I shuffle over in my Converse and a pair of pants that Ellie gave me with an elastic waistband that makes me feel like Fat Betty.

“Hey, Lon. You okay?” I ask, pushing a beer his way and grabbing a chilled ginger ale and a cracker that tastes like sawdust but settles things down nice and easy.

“You stay away from that guy. He’s been eyeing you all morning and he looks to be wanting death, he’s that obvious about it. Stay close to old Lon till Will gets here to take care of the little snot,” he growls, throwing another scowl and unclipping his piece.

“Er, no shooting. Company policy dictates I un-holster Bertha if a shot is fired, and I’d hate to have to pepper your old ass while you’re trying to defend me, Lon.”

I wouldn’t shoot this man if I had a gun to my head and we both know it, so his smile is expected and welcome when he suddenly narrows his eyes and lifts his chin.

The scream I hear comes a second later and I twist around in time to see Will smashing Fin’s face into the scarred old wood with so much force that his nose snaps before a river of blood comes rushing forth.

“You watching her that way for a reason, asshole?” Will snarls. I feel my skin prickle with gooseflesh.

Fin can hardly shake his head, much less speak, and I cringe away when Will pops him again and repeats the question.

“I said, are you watching her that way for a reason, asshole?”

“N-n-no boss, no, just…appreciating her is all. Can’t a man look?”

It takes my brain a few seconds to process the garbled mess that bubbles forth through the blood.

“Now see, here’s the thing. I don’t believe you, Finny boy. I think you’re watching her and thinking of all that money you took in exchange for grabbing her right here in my bar. And see again, I think that you were calculating every ounce of coke you can get up your nose with that money. That pisses me off, boy. It really does. You looking at my girl there, Finny? You see all that innocent beauty staring back at you, cringing for your pain? That woman belongs to us. She’s our princess, and what kind of brothers would we be if we let some scumbag junkie hurt her to earn drug money?”

The way Will keeps his tone light while pushing Fin’s face into the wood and forcing him to breathe in his own blood makes my skin crawl, and yet I feel so much anger.

Fin knows I’m pregnant. He knows I’m afraid and being watched all the time. I’ve served this man beer and food and spoken to him so much that I know his mother.

“Now, what I’m gonna do, Fin, is give you a few new life choices.”

Will bumps his chin toward the door and I don’t need to look back to see Jared and Jace walk in looking so furious. I know they’re here even before one of them comes up behind me and wraps an arm around me.

“Come on, sugar. Let’s get you home before Finny boy has to decide what he wants out of life.”

“But…but he has a mom who relies on him and—”

“Don’t you worry none about that, darlin’. We’ll take care of Misty. You just go on home and make sure you keep my godson safe.”

I want to cry and plead for poor Fin, but all I can manage is one last look before Jace picks me up and carries me out to the car.

Miah stands waiting, his gun drawn, looking mean enough to scare a monster. I feel safe again, just like that.

“You can stop hanging all over me now, Jace,” I say ten minutes later when the car’s moving and he has yet to let go of me.

I can barely see over the seat because of the way he has me pinned beneath one of his arms. I’m pretty certain I’ll have a hunched spine by the time we get home.

“Nope. I keep you safe till we reach home and that’s that. Christ, I lost ten years off my life when Lon called and Jared got to the driver’s seat first. The man made a thirty-minute trip in eight minutes, sweetheart. Try feeling steady after that,” Jace jokes darkly, making me laugh despite the nerves still gripping me.

“Oh yeah? Try feeling steady after you see a man almost smash another’s face in.”

To be fair to Will, Fin did have some really bad plans for me, so I forgive him. After all, without it I’d now be headed into God alone knows what sort of hell, leaving myself and my kid exposed to things I can’t even think about.

My shock and horror only stem from the risks I’ve been taking, because some small part of me thought that I could force him to come back if he knew how reckless I was being.

I can’t endanger myself or my kid anymore.

We pull into the gates minutes later and the only home I have comes into view against a backdrop of green that calls to me in a way I’ve never known.

For once I feel like I belong here. No matter what happens, I always will.

“We’re home, sweetheart. Come on,” Jace murmurs, taking my hand to pull me from the car.

Suddenly, I feel exhausted. I can barely keep my eyes open.

“Mel!”