Savage Love (12 page)

    
“There was this guy there and he was sitting across the desk from my dad. He was saying that he had made a mistake and that he wanted Dad to come back with him…somewhere…the guy was
crying.
Dad was just shaking his head and he looked like he was about to cry. I remember thinking, maybe it’s his brother. I had never met any of dad’s family and thought that maybe the whole time I had had an uncle or something, you know how little kids think. Then my dad was telling the guy that he had to leave because his daughter would be there soon. The guy said ‘you have a
daughter!’
Like my dad just told him he was an ax murderer or something. It was just weird!”

    
“Dad told him that he was married to a wonderful
Christian
woman,
and he emphasized both those word. Dad stood up and told him again that he had to leave. He asked him not to come back, that he wished him all the best but that he was not the same person that he used to be. I ran and hid behind one of the racks and watched the guy leave. He was real good looking and looked like the typical gay guy on TV, and he was still crying… a lot.”

     “How old were you?” he asked.

     “I think about seven or eight,” she said.

     “Maybe
you’ve made a mountain out of a molehill,” he suggested.

     “Maybe…
I don’t know. I never talked to him about it. I just felt sick, kind of embarrassed, like I caught him doing something wrong. But if it was what I think it was, then it was all over before my mom…and he told the guy to leave…that should count for something, right?” she said.

     “I never met your
dad, Sea, so it’s hard to say. But I do think that being gay is a choice and if your Dad chose to leave that life and then married your mom, that you shouldn’t hold it against him. Maybe your mom already knows and just didn’t want you to think any less of him. I think maybe you should talk this over with her. Maybe you just misread something all those years ago, or maybe it was just a friend from before he met you guys.”

     “But what if I bring it up and Mom doesn’t have a clue. I just think that would be too much to handle after all that she’s gone through,” said Seanna.

     “I think you should ask God, he’ll tell you what you should do. Have you prayed about it before?” he asked.

     “Most of the time I’m just asking God for it not to be true, pretty childish I know,” she commented.
“Why is it hard to deal with this junk about my dad, but so easy to accept your Uncle?”

     “I guess it’s always easier when it’s not your family. I’m pretty much feeling the same way about your dad, but have a hard time with Uncle Daffyd.”

     “I think you’re right. Thanks for the advice. I feel better just saying it all out loud. You’d make a great big brother, you know that?”

     “Yeah, and you’d be a pretty cute little sis, telling your big bro all your problems, and letting me
talk some sense into you,” he teased.

     “Ok,
big bro
how about that movie…” she laughed.

     Samantha had been reading next to Daffyd for some time when Daffyd finally stirred. “Trisha…” he whispered

     “No, it’s Samantha,” she whispered back.

     “Oh…where’s Bryce?” he asked a little disoriented.

     “He and Seanna are watching a movie. He has been sitting with you most of the day so I told him I’d stay for awhile.”

     “What are you reading?” Daffyd asked sleepily.

     “Bryce’s Bible,” she answered.

     “Can you read Psalms twenty-three?” he asked.

    
Is he really asking me to read him the Bible?
She wondered.

     “Of course…”She quickly back tracked to Psalm 23, and softly read, “The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters.  He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will
fear no evil; for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup runs over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the LORD Forever.”

     “You can keep reading…” he whispered.

     Samantha read several Psalms until she realized he was sleeping soundly. She reached over to feel his head. He was completely cool.
Thank you, Jesus, for allowing me to read your word to Daffyd tonight. I thank you that it will not return unto you void, but it will do what you have set it out to do. Thank you that the fever is gone and that Daffyd will have sweet sleep the rest of the night. Speak to him in his dreams, Lord. Heal his body and his spirit. Thank you for the opportunity to care for Daffyd in his time of trouble. I thank you also that you are keeping me and Seanna in your tender care.

Chapter 12

Unmasked

     The next morning Daffyd woke up to find Bryce asleep next to his bed. The poor kid had tried to scoot two chairs together and stretch out a little. Daffyd’s heart warmed at the sight of his nephew’s care. He could see by the clock that it was still early, barely five o’clock.
What a rough night that was. I remember lying down to take a nap before dinner…guess I missed out on those biscuits I asked for. Then I remember someone reading to me?

    
“Bryce,” he croaked.

     “Um…what,” answered the sleepy boy.

     “Go to bed,” laughed Daffyd.

     “Uncle Daffyd, how are you feeling?” asked Bryce.

     “Just peachy. You can go sleep in your own bed. Thanks for keeping me company, but I’m sure your back is going to complain about it later,” said Daffyd.     Bryce untangled himself from the blankets and chairs and stretched like a cat. He quickly put everything back where it belonged.

     “Do you need me to get you anything before I go?” Bryce asked.

     “I have some water here, maybe you could hang around for a second while I see if I can make it to the bathroom without some help…” answered Daffyd.     After a few minutes, Daffyd returned to bed and propped himself up with some pillows.

     “Did you read to me last night?” Daffyd asked Bryce as he was leaving.

     “Nope, maybe Samantha did. She sat with you for the first half of the night,” said Daffyd.

     “Thanks, was wondering if I just dreamt it or not... now go to bed!”

     After Bryce left, Daffyd reached for the water on his night stand and saw that there was a Bible laying there.
Was that what she read to me last night?
Daffyd opened it up and saw that it belonged to Bryce. He flipped to the psalms and read the same verses that he remembered from the night before.
I asked her to read this…man I must have been out of it. How long has it been since I have even opened a Bible?
Daffyd took his drink and then settled into his pillows and continued reading while the rest of the household slept.

     Samantha came into Daffyd’s room later that morning with his usual tea but instead of toast she brought a couple of buttered biscuits with jam from the night before. The girls had let Bryce sleep,
finding a note that he had left early in the morning saying that Daffyd was better and that he was going to bed. They took his kitchen turn and cheated having leftover biscuits and coffee for breakfast, making sure to save some for him. The morning was looking dull and overcast. Samantha figured they would have rain before lunch. Daffyd was sleeping and Bryce’s Bible was lying next to him on the bed.
I thought I put that on the table,
thought Samantha. Leaning over to grab the Bible, she laid her hand on his head to check for a fever. Daffyd opened his eyes to find Samantha face to face. He smiled wide and she quickly backed up and gave him a sheepish grin.

     “Sorry, was just checking to see if you were normal...” she stammered.

     “Is that how they check for that now days?” he joked.

     “I meant your temperature,” she said clearly embarrassed.

     “Well I am glad you didn’t have a thermometer in your hand. I hate waking up to that!” He continued to add to her embarrassment. “You are turning a lovely shade of red so I will stop teasing. Actually other than being a little tired, I feel pretty good.”

     “I’m glad. You gave us quite the scare last night. Well, Bryce wasn’t too worried, but Seanna and I were. In her words, she ‘freaked’. My daughter isn’t cut out for nursing, that’s for sure. Now how about some of those biscuits you wanted, do you feel up for that?” she asked.

     “At this point I would eat them even if I couldn’t keep them down. They even factored in my fever induced crazy dreams last night,” he answered as he scooted up into his pillows again. As he pulled up the blankets he acted as if he was looking for something.

     “Are you looking for this?” asked Samantha holding up the Bible.
This time it was Daffyd’s turn to blush.

     “Um…I just
wanted… Bryce forget he left it in here…” he replied lamely.

     “You asked me to read it to you last night, even specifically asked me to read Psalm
s twenty-three,” said Samantha completely enjoying herself.

     Daffyd got real serious and told her, “My mom used to read
that chapter to Gareth and me when we were scared. I used to have pretty nasty dreams when I was a kid and would be afraid to go to bed. She read it to us so many times that we got to where we could say it along with her. I hadn’t heard it for years.”

     “I find comfort in a lot of the scriptures. There seems to be something for every situation,” said Samantha quietly.

     “I wish it still worked,” said Daffyd.

     “Wish what still worked?”She asked.

     “Having a verse take away all the fears like it used to,” he answered.

     “God’s word hasn’t changed, Daffyd…”

     “No, but I sure have. I just can’t buy into all that stuff anymore,” he said sadly.

     “That’s where you have it wrong. We don’t ‘buy into’ anything. We just let go and let God speak to our hearts. When we try to figure it all out, we mess things up. I was trying to figure out all this new information about Richard and it
has been driving me literally crazy. I decided to just let it go. He was good to us, and he loved us. That’s all I need to know right now. I am trusting God to help me work out anything that I need to and to just let the rest go.”

     “
You make it sound so easy…” he said.

     “It isn’t though. The hardest thing is to get past myself, my bitterness and confusion,” she explained.

     “I decided years ago, that if I needed anything, I would have to get it or do it myself,” he stated.

     “And how is that working out for you?” she asked quietly.
Daffyd just looked at her. She got up and purposely left the Bible on the bed and walked out of the room.
I can’t argue this with him. You talk to his heart, Lord. Help him to see how much he needs you.

     When Bryce finally woke, he made his way to the kitchen, stomach growling. Seanna was there with his laptop on the kitchen table. He had let her use it the day before. She was totally engrossed in what she was looking at and didn’t hear him come in. He quietly stepped up behind her to see what could be so interesting. She had a picture up of his Uncle Daffyd. It was an older picture from his early years. He was on a stage, holding a guitar, long hair wet with and flying around his head, his body sweaty, and he had on the tightest possible shiny pants you could find. Seanna had her face all screwed up and he heard her whisper ‘
gross’.

     “Pretty nasty huh?” he said, making her jump in her seat.

     “You almost made me pee my pants! What are you doing sneaking around?” she exclaimed.

     “I was hungry, and I’m not the one sneaking. What would you have done if I would have been your Mom, or Uncle Daffyd?” he asked.

     “I am just curious, that’s all. It’s all so weird. He just doesn’t seem the type. I was just bored and decided to google him again. There are a couple of biscuits left, and I fried some bacon and left it in the oven,” she said.

     “Thanks, I am starved. I think I’ll fry an egg to go with,” he said, heading to the fridge.

     “You and your eggs,” she laughed. “Hey, I should be able to find some videos on here shouldn’t I?”

     “Tons, but if you wait until I eat, we should go somewhere else, if you don’t want your Mom finding out,” he offered.

     “Your room is too close to his, mine’s too close to Mom’s. Will we get a signal on the patio?” she asked.