Saving Grace (The Grace Series Book 2) (25 page)

“Jessica, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” Trent interrupted. “If you say no, the general will leave. Won’t you, General?”

The general ignored Trent and went on, “Miss Emerson, I didn’t want to have this discussion in front of your family, but if I have to, I will.” He paused. “I am here at the request of Julien Grace, the man you have known as Jonathan Kinsley. He wants to speak with you, but due to his injuries, he is not able to come here on his own. You will come with me and I will bring you to him. After you’ve spoken to him, I will return you here to your home.”

Luther grabbed the general’s arm. “No!” he shouted. “My daughter will have nothing to do with that man ever again. Do you hear me! He has done enough to her!”

“Your promises mean nothing, General,” Trent continued the argument. “The whole lot of you are liars and cheats. Jessica will not go with you anywhere!”

The general yanked his arm free. “How quickly you people forget who is at fault here. You should be counting your blessings, Mr. Emerson. The only reason you are not behind bars right now is due to the charity of that man.”

The general turned back to Jessica, but he lowered his voice considerably. “Miss Emerson, I am not used to begging, but in this I will. On Major Grace’s behalf, I will. It is imperative that you come. Er… um… please.”

“What does he want to talk to me about?” Jessica asked tentatively.

“That is between you and him,” the general said. “I implore you, Miss Emerson. If you ever had warm feelings for him during your relationship, consider them, and come with me.”

“I don’t think I should,” Jessica said.

The general lowered his voice even more. “Miss Emerson, Major Grace is not doing well.”

Jessica’s heart leapt in her chest.

“Good,” Trent snarled. “I hope he dies. He deserves to die after what he put my sister through!”

The general spun toward Trent so fast, Jessica felt the wind of it. “Mr. Emerson, watch yourself!” His glower remained fixed on Trent until Trent took a cowed step back.

Jessica glanced from her father to her brother and back again. Trent looked spooked. Her father just looked sad. Again she envisioned the major in the courtroom. She saw the thin stream of blood run over his lip and chin. She saw his eyes as he gazed at her on his way out of the courtroom. She heard his whispery voice. “Forgive me…”

Jessica forced herself to look up, to look the general in the eye. “I’ll come with you, but only if Trent can come as well.”

The general didn’t hesitate. “Yes, of course.”

Any self-satisfaction he may have felt at winning her over was not evident in his arrogant expression. And he waited, without complaint, for her to get her reticule and shawl.

The general’s coach was dark inside. The only light was coming in around the edges of the black curtains. The general sat opposite Jessica and Trent, and told them their destination wasn’t far. The moment the wheels began to move, Trent reached up to open the curtain.

“No!” the general barked. “The windows stay covered.”

“Why?” Trent snorted. “Does the light bother your eyes?”

Jessica would have much preferred her brother keep his mouth shut.

The general said coldly, “It is imperative Major Grace’s location remain undisclosed. He has many enemies here.”

Trent grunted.

“Yourselves included,” the general added.

They lapsed into silence. Most of the ride, Jessica spent staring at her hands in her lap, but every so often she glanced at the general. Every time she did, she noticed the same thing. He was staring at the curtain as if he could see right through it. Outwardly he scowled, but there was more to his dubious expression—worry.

His black eyes darted to her and Jessica was caught. She had to say something to excuse her stare. Quietly she murmured, “You said the major is not doing well?”

“He is very ill,” the general said shortly, and then he turned once more to his curtain.

For the remainder of the drive, not another word was spoken.

At their destination, the general climbed out of the coach first. Jessica touched his proffered hand, but put no weight on it to help her step down. Already she was taking in her surroundings.

They were parked in front of a large white house. Two armed, uniformed soldiers stood at attention on either side of the porch steps. A quick glance around revealed no outbuildings or other dwellings. They were somewhere in the country. As far as the eye could see were nothing but rolling hills and woodland covered mountains.

The house itself was immaculate. The style reminded Jessica somewhat of Bent Oak Manor, but it was larger. The deep, covered porch running the length of the front was complete with floral hangings and wooden rocking chairs, two on either side of the double door entrance. The only visible flaw was the freshly seeded grassy area near the house that had not yet fully grown in.

“Follow me,” the general said. As he passed the soldiers they saluted him, but he said nothing to them. At the door, he stepped to the side and gestured for her to precede him.

Jessica was unsure whether she should turn the latch or knock. The decision, however, was taken from her. Before she could do either, the door swung inward.

“Oh!” Jessica exclaimed. Herlin Jefferson was standing there.

He smiled. “Miss Jessica. It’s good to see you. Please come in.”

She was flustered, not only at seeing Herlin, but because of his refined speech. He sounded so different. Suddenly memories sparked. He spoke like this before—when the general first came to Bent Oak Manor. He spoke this way earlier than that, in Jon’s bedroom. How had she not noticed? But she had noticed. She had just been too rattled at the time to consider it, and then she’d forgotten about it.

She was floundering stupidly. She had to say something. “I’m glad to see you, too. I… I didn’t expect you to be here.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Herlin said. “Jonny will be glad you’ve come.” Then he stepped aside so she could enter.

It smelled new inside, like freshly cut wood and paint. The walls in the foyer were papered in gold, complemented by white decorative woodwork. Except for the coloring, the space reminded her very much of Bent Oak Manor. The surroundings, however, barely registered.

There were two men standing near the curved staircase. One of them Jessica recognized instantly. She was so shocked by his presence she had to force her jaw to close. The Reverend Samuel Amos was the last person she ever expected to be here.

The other man was white. He was older and shorter, with auburn hair and glasses. No one seemed inclined to introduce him. Biting her lip, she turned back to Herlin. “Is Martha with you? And Willy? How are they?”

“They are here. Ditter, Ruth, Jacob and Chelsea are here, too, and we’re all doing well,” Herlin said. “If you have time before you leave, they would be pleased to see you. But first you must go to Jonny.”

There was something in Herlin’s eyes that frightened her, something in the way he glanced toward Reverend Amos that caused Jessica’s already erratically beating heart to trip over itself. And why was Herlin referring to the major as ‘Jonny’?

He’d done that before, too, after Jon was shot. She’d thought Herlin was just trying to calm him, but now… “You really care for him?” she murmured. “He was so cruel to you. He beat you…”

Herlin shook his head. “No, Miss Jessica. He told me to cry out. He hit me so lightly with that whip I barely felt it. The blood you saw on my back was not mine. It was his. He coated the whip’s tail with his own blood, so those men would think it was cutting me.”

Jessica’s bewilderment was overwhelming. “He said such awful things to you…”

“Just words, Miss Jessica,” Herlin said. “Just words. He didn’t mean them. He is the most considerate man I have ever known. He saved my life many times. Go to him now, ma’am. Please.”

Jessica shook her head. “But—”

“This way, Miss Emerson,” the general interrupted.

He led her to a set of closed double doors to the left. He grasped the latch, but before he turned it, he glared at her and threatened gruffly, “Do not upset him!”

The door opened. Jessica took two steps into the room. Her breath caught.

The parlor was enormous, almost twice the size of the parlor at Bent Oak Manor. It had high ceilings and walls painted a dark olive color. There was a smattering of embroidered chairs and a sofa set haphazardly near the right wall. They looked as if they’d been placed there more to get them out of the way than as an arranged sitting area. A large, but empty curio cabinet was also against that wall. To the right of an elaborate stone fireplace and mantel, was a concert-sized, mahogany grand piano. It was an even more beautiful instrument than the one at Bent Oak Manor.

To the left, near the front windows, was a large, four-poster canopied bed, placed diagonally so whoever was lying in it would easily be able to look outside. The bed was fully made, covered with an egg-shell toned comforter. A number of pillows were propped against the wood-carved headboard. By the head of the bed was a wheelchair identical to the one the major sat in during the trial. Like the bed, it too, was empty.

Near the foot of the bed was a high-backed, embroidered rocking chair, and this was where he was. He was dressed in a black suit. A navy blue and gold, crocheted afghan covered his legs. One of his hands lay on the arm of the chair with his fingers dangling from the edge of it, and the other was limply fisted in his lap. His head rested against the back of the chair, and his eyes were closed.

Behind Jessica, the general said, “We will give them privacy.” The door latch clicked, but she didn’t turn around.

A wingback chair had been placed opposite the rocking chair. It didn’t belong in the middle of the room that way. Obviously it was there for someone to converse with him. Jessica went to it and perched herself on the very edge. She couldn’t tell from across the room, but this close she saw his mouth was slightly open. For a moment she watched his chest rise and fall and she listened to the faint wheeze of his breath. It wasn’t loud, but it wasn’t normal. Because he was so still and he didn’t open his eyes, she thought perhaps he was asleep.

Suddenly her eyes misted. Whether this was because of how unwell he appeared, or because of what he revealed about his feelings for her in the courtroom, or even because of what Herlin just said about him, she didn’t know. Hastily, she swiped her hand across her eyes and sniffled.

The noise must have roused him. He opened his eyes. And then he smiled, but it wasn’t much of a smile and it quickly vanished. He said, “You came.” His voice was as she remembered from the court room, whispery, but now it was even more faint and halting.

He took a breath, and another, as if they hurt him, and then he said, “I was so a… afraid you would… wouldn’t come. You… you are so… so lovely.”

The way he spoke, breathing between and through words, frightened her. She didn’t know what to do, or what to think. “The general said you wanted to speak with me?” she asked tentatively.

Slowly, he said, “I asked Seth to… to bring you here be… because I need to tell you… I want you to… to know how sorry I am a… about everything. And I w…want to try to make… make things right for you. The only way… way I know how to do that is to ask… ask you to ma… marry me again, to… to marry the real me.”

Jessica shook her head and stood up.

“Please.” He took several harsh breaths. “Don’t… don’t go. Please sit… sit down. Please stay.”

There was desperation in his hollowed eyes that made her do as he asked, but as before, she kept to the very edge of the seat. “Please don’t patronize me, Major,” she said quietly.

He briefly closed his eyes. “I need to tell y… you… I need you to know, how much I… I love you, Jess. I fell in love wi… with you during all of th… this insane charade. I fell in… in love with you be… before the wedding, before the marriage wi… with Kinsley. I wasn’t supposed to because of…of what I c…came here to do, but y…you stole my heart. Y…you mean more to me th…than I know how to say. I need t…to make this right for you.”

He stopped speaking, shut his eyes and just breathed. When he opened his eyes, he said, “I think you know fr…from the trial, my name i…is Julien Grace. I want to marry you legally… legitimately. I want to give you m…my real name.”

He paused again to catch his breath and Jessica watched him anxiously. “I don’t know you. I don’t know anything about you. I can’t. I won’t marry you.”

There was such despair in his expression Jessica felt her heart flip-flop.

He whispered, “I don’t want you t…to suffer this reputation put upon you b… by what happened. I need t…to make sure your life is n…not tarnished by what I did. You don’t de...deserve this. I nee… need to make sure your fu…future is secure. You are pure… beautiful… precious to me. Let me do this for you. L…let me make it right. Please.”

“At the trial you said you didn’t love me,” Jessica said quietly.

“They asked if I loved you when I…I proposed marriage to you. At th…that time, I didn’t know you. If th…they had asked about m… my feelings now I…I would have said I love you. I would have said yes.”

What he said about the question posed to him at the trial was true, but Jessica didn’t have time to dwell on it, because as soon as he stopped speaking, he bowed his head forward and made a horrible noise in his throat, like he needed to cough, but couldn’t. Instead it sounded like he was choking. When he tried to take a breath, he didn’t seem capable of doing that either. He gasped and gasped, struggling loudly to draw in air.

“Are you alright? Should I ask the general to come in?” she asked anxiously.

Slowly, gradually, his raw attempts to inhale became regular again, but he just sat there with his head down and his eyes tightly closed. In his fist, she saw he was holding a white handkerchief. It was dotted with blood. With a trembling hand he used it to cover his nose and mouth, and she watched him wipe blood away. When he was done, his fingers curled around the handkerchief and his hand dropped to his lap. Moving very slowly, without opening his eyes, he rested his head against the chair, and there he remained, completely still, wheezing in and out each horrid drop of air.

Jessica watched him for a long time. He stayed the same way, not moving, just breathing. It was obvious, by his expression, he wasn’t comfortable. Eventually, much to her relief, his features began to relax. “Are you alright?” she asked again.

He opened his eyes in narrow slits and looked directly at her, but he didn’t answer the question.

“Why does your nose bleed like that?” she asked. “I saw it happen at the trial. Does the doctor know why?”

“My doctors say I…I’m bleeding inside, in my lungs,” he whispered.

Jessica frowned. “But you look better. You’re better than you were at the trial.” Even as the words left her mouth, she knew she was lying. The bruises under his eyes were deeper, his cheeks were more sallow and sunken, and his skin was a sickly, ashen grey. He didn’t look better than he did in the court room. If anything, he looked worse. Much worse.

He rolled his head against the high back of the chair and whispered, “I’m not going to get better, Jess.”

Out of the pregnant silence that followed, he said, “Let me marry you. Let me marry you to…today. I’ll see to it you never want for a… anything. You’ll have a…a home, anywhere you want, move away, stay here, it doesn’t matter. You can ha…have hundreds of beautiful dresses, a dozen pianos if…if you want them, flower gardens, peach trees, horses, anything, anything y…your heart desires. As my wife, as m…my widow, I can give you everything. Everything I have will b…be yours.”

Jessica started to shake her head, but his whispery stutter stopped her.

“And someday, I know you wi…will find someone who sees th… the beauty in you, someone t…to share your life with, to grow old with, someone y...you can love, who…who will love you th…the way I wanted to.” His whisper grew even fainter, and he repeated, “I wanted to.”

Jessica’s voice broke as she murmured, “I don’t know what to believe. There are so many lies.”

“Please, Jess, please don’t cry. I am so sorry, so sorry f…for keeping this from you. I wi… I wish I c…could go back and ch…change it. Please, believe me.”

Jessica could see distress in every line of his drawn countenance. It almost looked like he would cry himself. Her tears threatened to fall, and she had to sniffle several times to get them under control.

“Please,” he begged, “please…” He closed his eyes and leaned forward, bowing his head. And then he made that awful choking noise again.

Jessica flinched as he did. She wanted to do something for him, something to help him. She wanted to run away and not see him like this at all.

When finally he leaned back and opened his eyes, he said, “I love you, Jess. I love you. Please let me marry you t…today. Please let me d…do this f…for you. Please say…say yes.”

Jessica didn’t answer him. Instead she asked, “Your real name is Julien Grace?”

“Yes.”

“At the trial, the general called you Jonny. Herlin called you Jonny. If your name is Julien, why did they both call you Jonny?”

“My brother couldn’t say m…my name when he…he was little. He called me Jooney. People heard him a…and assumed he wa…was trying to s…say Jonny. Th…the name stuck with me. Even my fa… father called me Jonny.”

“You have a brother?” Jessica asked.

“I have three bro…brothers. Etienne, Adrien and Leon.”

“Your mother really was French?” Jessica asked.

It looked like he was trying to smile. “Yes. She is also still a… alive.”

Jessica stared at him, wondering if there was truth to any of the things he told her. Her resolve strengthened. There was no way she could marry this stranger. “Do they know?” she asked quietly. “Does your family know about what’s happened to you?”

“Yes,” he whispered.

“Have you seen them? Have they come to be with you?”

He shook his head and looked away. “The distance is…is far. I…I told them not to come.”

“But—” Jessica caught herself. “Are you not close to them? Do they not care?”

Even though he didn’t look at her she saw sorrow in him that made her heart wrench. He didn’t respond to her questions. He just closed his eyes and leaned his head back.

Jessica watched the pain evident in his wan features for a long time while a myriad of thoughts ran through her mind. Foremost however, was what he said about not recovering. He would die and never see his family again. No matter about all that happened, no matter how often she told herself she hated this man, no one should have to die alone, without being near their loved ones. She remembered how badly she’d felt for him before they married, when she believed he had no family at all. But, he did have family—family who didn’t come to be with him when he needed them the most. Somehow this seemed worse than having no one.

After a while he seemed moderately peaceful, like he was when she came into the room, and she wondered as the minutes ticked by whether he fell asleep. She watched his chest rise and fall. She watched his fist lightly curl in around the handkerchief he held, and loosen again.

She remembered something she’d said to him in anger. She told him she hoped he suffered a long and painful death. Looking at him now, guilt coursed through her so strongly her heart began to beat erratically. And in that moment, all of her firm conviction melted away. Softly, she said, “I will marry you.”

Instantly, he opened his eyes and picked his head up. And then he breathed and breathed, each coarse inhalation louder than the last. With the hand that was on the arm of the chair, he reached up and covered his eyes. His fingers trembled, and he murmured, “Will you… will you…” His voice faded away as his chest heaved and his breath began to rattle.

Alarmed, Jessica said, “What is it? Do you need help?” She didn’t wait for his response. She was already up and hurrying to the door.

Before she reached it, it swung open and the general barreled through. Herlin was on his heels, with Reverend Amos behind him. The other gentleman from the foyer followed. Martha came in too, with Trent after her.

As he brushed past Jessica, the general seethed, “What the hell did you do to him?”

THWACK!

Everyone startled. Jessica visibly jumped. Even the general stopped dead in his tracks. All their heads turned abruptly toward the sound. Toward the major.

The loud noise came from his palm slamming down onto the wide arm of the chair, the same hand that, a moment before, had been covering his eyes. He was sitting straight up in the chair. Deeply, gravelly, he roared, “SETH!”

The major’s focus was on the general, and Jessica thought, in all the time she’d been around this man, she’d never seen him so outraged. At the same time one tear slipped from his eye, running over his pronounced cheek bone, down his sunken cheek and over his jaw. Both of his eyes were brimming.

It took a moment for Jessica to figure out he was chastising the general for what the general just said to her. It took another moment for her to realize why he covered his eyes in the first place. Everyone in the room was gaping at him. It didn’t escape Jessica’s notice that as he sat there, glowering at the general, he was completely silent. He wasn’t breathing at all.

Although no other part of him moved, his eyes darted to her. He looked at her for mere seconds before his features crumpled and he began to choke. When his eyelids closed, tears fell out from under them. His whole body leaned forward, and his weight fell to his forearm. His efforts on her behalf cost him dearly, and Jessica had to turn away. She couldn’t watch. She wasn’t the only one, either. Herlin, she noticed looked the other way, too. The general was the one who went to the rocking chair and lowered to his haunches beside it.