Secrets of the Women's Self-Bondage Cult (4 page)

      
Duct tape:
This is the present day, ubiquitous bondage medium used so often in films and drama. I have used it with care, finding that a mistake with tape can be devastating if you do not have the means to cut it nearby. If you decide to use it as a mouth sealer, be aware that it will pull hair out when removed and in some cases, it may actually remove a top layer of skin. I was once tape bound in an airport hotel and when I escaped, I noticed that the tape took off a layer of recently tanned skin with it. This left me with striped legs, which had to be explained.

       If you stuff your mouth first, using tape to secure it may work for you. Personally, I prefer other gag types. But I have also found that even if my lips are sealed with duct tape, if I can get my tongue out, I can slowly remove the adhesive contact with my lips and eventually speak and breathe around the tape. If my mouth is plugged with a rag or ball before the tape is applied, this solution is unlikely to work.

      
550 Para cord
: This sturdy cord doesn't break easily or stretch, so it's important to know exactly how to use it and when it is not appropriate. The original design had a central core with multiple strands around it, enclosed in a nylon exterior sheath. I have experimented with other types of cord, but for me, this works best. It is very compact, which means you can do a lot of tying with a small bundle of cord. It also needs to have the ends heat-sealed. Beware of imitations.

      
Hemp/Jute rope
: Primitive, exotic, expensive. This light brown, (available in other colors), cord has been the most common bondage element in thousands of Japanese BDSM photos, videos and films. It has characteristics that loan it well to this application, but it tends to knot very tightly, which means cutting it to free yourself. This means you need a hell of a big supply of expensive rope if you tie yourself, (or anyone else), with any frequency. It has a unique texture with a soft/rough feeling on the skin. Personally, I find it erotic just because of its historical use, but I do not use it. Ever.

      
Polypropylene rope
- This is cheap plastic rope that can do harm if used incorrectly. It is commonly used for marking off areas and as a water ski towrope because it floats. If it is pulled fast across the skin, it will, like other ropes, leave a nasty burn scar. It does not knot easily or reliably. I never use it and would not suggest that anyone else do so either.

      
Clothesline
- A last ditch solution, but not recommended. Most brands are coated with a kind of paint that stiffens the rope and makes it hard to knot. Old clothesline may, in some cases, seem kinky, but it is not especially strong, so do not try it for suspensions.

Passive or neutral media

Belts

       The best SB belts are those with a full adjustment. That is, they have holes over the entire length and can go from a two-inch loop to your waist size easily and without modification. Leather or woven fabric seems to wear longest.

       Probably the easiest SB gear to have in your home without giving out signals about bondage is a good supply of belts. For most of us, this is easy because over time, we tend to accumulate a wide rage of styles and sizes and they can all be stashed in the same drawer or on hooks in the closet and no one will care. One excellent SB design that is also inexpensive is the military uniform web belt with a brass buckle that can go from a wrist-sized loop to around a waist or chest. There are cheap imitations, but the real thing is best and will last longest. For storage, these roll up nicely and they can be held with a rubber band.

Nylon stockings, neckties and scarves:

       The beauty of using these items is that they are part of every woman's (and some men's), daily life. Unless you live in the tropics, these articles of female clothing and accessories seem far better suited to bondage than what might be found in a man's closet. I have never heard of anyone being tied up with a pair of men's jockey shorts or boxers, but I suppose it's possible, but certainly not very kinky. However, nylon stockings get a second life after they are unwearable. Panty hose too have a use and I never throw a pair away. I often launder them, then cut off the legs and save all three parts for later use. The legs make excellent and very strong rope substitutes and the panty tops can function as mouth stuffing or even as a holding band for gags. I have found that a doubled panty top will make a very secure gag. Here's how: I put my head through both leg holes, then pull it tight so that the crotch goes through my mouth, which is either empty or stuffed with gag material or a ball. Then I twist the panty 180 degrees and pull the waistband back around front and through my mouth again. Depending on the size and style of pantyhose, this can work extremely well. Control top panty hose are even more stringent.

       With the cut-off pantyhose legs, I usually make a loop with a tightened square knot. Doubled up, this loop is perfect for slipping hands through and holding them well in front or behind my back. The stocking legs also tie ankles well with a second or third loop over the instep and under the heel of a high heel shoe, keeping the shoes on, no matter what you do. The taller the heel, the better. I have also used panty hose as an elbow binding and this is, although it sounds complicated, one solution to the constant problem of getting a good elbow tie that one can eventually escape from. The simplest design is to use the cut-off panty hose tops and put your arms through the leg holes, letting the elbows hold the now compacted panty and tying your hands further down on your back or in front. The elastic in the panties works well for this and it will take some experimentation to get it right.

       Tights and panty hose can also be used with limited success to create an arm binder sleeve. This gets complicated because you need a way to pull the top of the sleeve up and over your elbows and hold it there. I have experimented with pulleys and a complex 550-cord arrangement that allowed me to pull the single glove of panty hose up and secure it, but at times, this just gets too frustrating to pursue. Of course, once it is properly set up, it is impossible to get free without cutting the cords!

       Therefore, stockings and panty hose can be an SB girl's best friend. For you guys, well, I suppose there is some justification to having stockings and pantyhose in your kit, but you need to figure this out. One man I recently met said he buys pantyhose in the grocery store and says that he uses them for polishing his boots and shoes….which is, of course, a common use. Another man stocks up on panty hose every Halloween and gets away with it without anyone caring.

       Men's neckties, especially old ones that are no longer in fashion, make useful and seemingly neutral SB media. Like hose, a knotted tie may be very hard to untie and may have to be cut to get free. When traveling, especially in these times when every thing in your luggage gets inspected, carrying plenty of ties, a few extra belts and having adjustable luggage straps can all provide useful SB gear while on the road.

Wire

       Wire or flex is a useful medium as long as you know what you are doing. Common household electric wire, the type used to connect a lamp to the outlet, is an acceptable binder and the rubber covering will protect your skin to some degree. Heavier wire can serve as a nearly permanent binding and can be used in shapes that will be retained. By this, I mean that if you use some heavy copper wire and shape it into a set of wrist cuffs; you may be able to use them repeatedly until the wire fatigues and breaks. I am not a fan of wire, but I have experimented with it and it can be quite erotic, especially when used as a breast binding with a wire harness.

Anything else that works

       I have used everything from shoelaces to airline headphone tubing for personal bondage. Creative use of bindings usually has a stimulating effect. Use caution to assure that you can get out of whatever you do. This is especially true of thin cords and wire. If you have creative talent, there is a lot of SB gear you can make at home.

Techniques

      
Before you do anything, learn how to tie and untie a few important knots. If there is one single thing that gets bondage people in trouble it's tying the wrong knot or tying a knot improperly. This is serious…Just as serious as putting on handcuffs and then realizing you do not have the key.

       Nothing will screw up your bondage fantasy faster than using the wrong knots. I was not a Girl Scout, but I learned about knots when I spent a few summers at camp. We actually had classes in knot tying, which may sound pretty dull today, but it made a strong impression on me that lasted. If you don't learn anything else, learn how to tie and untie these five common knots:

· bowline

· sheet bend

· two half hitches

· square knot 

· hangman's noose

       Each of these can be used for tying yourself or anyone else with reasonable safety and, if you learn it correctly, knowing how they can be untied is extremely useful. For example, the beauty of the bowline is that you can make a loop that will not slip or tighten up. This is very important and you will find continued reference to this characteristic throughout this book. If you learn nothing else, learn the bowline knot and learn to tie and untie it with one hand. Knowing this might save your life!

Positions

Hogtie

       I have always enjoyed putting myself into a hogtie. It is a highly effective position and seems, to me anyway, to expose the right body parts to erotic stimulation as well as creating the psychological impact of total immobilization. There are probably some escape artists out there who will say they can get out of a hog tie, but for the average Jane or Joe, depending on the amount of tension, it's a rather restrictive position. There are infinite variations, but the basic one is with wrists tied to ankles behind the back. How closely the wrists and ankles are mated is a matter of preference and physical condition. What you use to create the position will also affect the outcome.

       For me, the easiest way to hogtie myself is to take an eight-foot length of braided rope, not more than 1/2 inch in diameter, with the ends burn-melted to prevent fraying. I tie it into a closed loop using a bowline or sheet bend. In other words, I make a circle of rope.

       By the way, these two knots are actually the same. The bowline is best if you are using the end of a rope for a loop and the sheet bend is ideal of joining the two ends of a single rope together, even if they are different size or type. So use this knot as I have suggested here.

       Tie a sheet bend and make it snug. Then make two double slip loops, one at each end. When you look at this, you can see it resembles a large rope handcuff, only larger. Test it by putting one wrist in one loop and pull the loop until it encircles your wrist. You will see that if you pull it tight, it will stay that way until you open the loop.

       Now lie on your stomach and place the double slip loop on one end around your ankles and the other around your wrists. Experiment with various lengths of rope until you get the desired effect. Longer rope means a greater distance between wrists and feet and will be easier to get out of. The shorter the rope, the smaller the slip loops and the closer your hands and feet must be.

       You can modify this position by tightening the ankle loops and pulling the remaining end though the space between the feet to cinch the loop, but remember that when you do this, you will no longer be able to loosen or slip the loop off your feet if there is tension on the rope. In other words, any cinching of hands or feet will make escape more difficult and having a sharp knife or razor blade nearby is important for safe escape.

       Once you have your feet bound with ankles either side-by-side or crossed, place your hands through the other double slip loop and test to see that you can get out of it when you want to. Remember the point made earlier about planning? This is where you need to plan carefully BEFORE you get yourself into an inescapable or hard to escape situation.

       So, after testing, slip your crossed or pressed together wrists through this loop. Now test the tension between your bent legs and wrists. If the rope is too long, wrap it around your ankles for another turn. You really cannot take too many turns around you feet, so use this method as the way to get the proper length, remembering that in doing so, you further inhibit freeing your feet. By bending your knees, you should be able to have enough rope for the final double loop for your hands. As always, test and experiment with this method BEFORE you tighten up, making sure that the tension between feet and hands is not so great as to lock the wrist loop to a point where you cannot release it. Note also that even though you have used a sheet bend to make the initial long loop, releasing this knot may not, in an emergency, allow you to free your hands if the hands loop is too tight or otherwise restricted. In the best case, you get out of this by arching your body a bit more, bringing your ankles close to your hands and slipping the doubled loop off your wrists.

       Is it better to cross your wrists or place them side my side in the double loop? I don't know. Sometimes one way works better than another. Nevertheless, what you do not want to do is place a cinch on both loops. The function of cinching any rope is to make it stay tight and in this case, you want to be able to release the wrist loop, so do not cinch it...ever.