Shame On Me
Authors: Cassie Maria
Shame On Me
Cassie Maria
Copyright 2014 Cassie Maria
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your enjoyment only, then please return to your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Shame On Me is a work of fiction. All names, characters, places, and incidents in this book are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any similarity to locations, actual events, establishments, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.
Warning this book is intended for adults 18 years old and older
. This book contains graphic sex scenes and is intended for those who like their sex a little dirty.
Table of Contents
Chapter Three ~ Something Different
Chapter Four ~ The Morning After
Chapter Six ~ Laying Down the Law
Chapter Eight ~ An Omission is a Lie
Chapter Nine ~ Enjoying the Fall
Chapter Ten ~ Enough is Enough
Chapter Twelve ~ Embrace the Weirdness
Chapter Thirteen ~ Surprising Ava
Chapter Fourteen ~ Mom Knows No Bounds
Chapter Sixteen ~ Sometimes It Hurts
Chapter Eighteen ~ Sleepwalking
Chapter Nineteen ~ Never Again
Chapter Twenty-One ~ I Wish You the Best
Chapter Twenty-Two ~ Desperately Seeking a Friend
Chapter Twenty-Three ~ Because This Is Forever
Chapter Twenty-Four ~ Learning to Love
Chapter Twenty-Five ~ Figuring It Out
Chapter Twenty-Six ~ Getting It Right
Chapter Twenty-Eight ~ It Only Gets Better
Chapter Twenty-Nine ~ And Then Came Bria
Chapter Thirty-One ~ One Step Closer
Chapter Thirty-Two ~ A Good Foundation
Chapter Thirty-Three ~ I Promise
This book is dedicated to everyone who found their happy ending when they weren’t looking.
Eyes Wide Open
Saturday
My eyes slowly open and lock on to an oversized bookcase next to a window with no curtains. This has to be a dream. It has to be!
I close my eyes and take a deep breath to calm myself. When I open them again I realize that it’s not a dream.
Shit it’s not a dream.
It’s not a dream.
IT’S NOT A DREAM!
Okay it’s safe to say that I am officially freaking out!
I crack one eye open in hopes that my mind is playing ticks on me. I see that stupid bookcase again and close my eye. I pull the covers up high enough to see that I’m only wearing my bra.
Great.
I try to remember the details from the night before in hopes of figuring out how in the hell I got here.
Last night I went to the bar with Ava after she discovered me looking pitiful in my recliner. I was then shoved into a short skirt and an even smaller top. Speaking of which, where are my clothes?
I open my eyes and do a quick scan of the floor (without moving my body of course) and find my top but not my skirt.
Shit
.
Okay focus.
We made it to the bar where we did shots of vodka chased by a few mixed drinks that tasted like sweet tarts. After several shots we got sweaty on the dance floor where Ava met some guy with a goatee and I danced with
him
.
The hell with the details, how can I get outta here without him noticing me? I glance over and see he’s facing the opposite wall and is still asleep. I inch my way to the edge of the bed and quietly fall off the side of it.
I hit the floor soundlessly and am ecstatic to find my skirt hanging from the bottom of his nightstand drawer. I look under the bed for my panties but don’t find them. With our history it’s not hard to figure out that they never even made it to the bedroom.
I need to get moving so I grab my clothing and ninja crawl to the bedroom door. On my journey to the door I pass a condom wrapper and my eyes lock on it. I pray that it’s from our encounter and not from one of his other conquests.
I refocus my attention on the bedroom door and continue my escape. I’m slowly making my way to the door when my hand slips on something wet.
I begin breathing deeply through my nose as I close my eyes and pray that it’s not what I think it is. I look down and realize that my hand is indeed stuck to a condom.
A freshly used condom.
Eww
.
I chance a glance at the bed to ensure that my dirty secret is still asleep. I’m on my hands and knees frozen in fear that he’ll wake up and catch me sneaking out. I don’t move again until I’m absolutely certain that he’s still asleep.
When I reach the door I slowly pull it open and take one last look at him. I allow my eyes to lazily take in his low haircut, slanted eyes, caramel skin, and his right foot hanging over the side of the bed.
I drop my head in shame even though I shouldn’t be surprised that I woke up here; Noah has always been an itch that I need to scratch. I take a deep breath before climbing to my feet and leaving the bedroom.
I silently thank God when I find my oversized purse on his couch. I immediately pull out my baby wipes and thoroughly clean my hand. I want to clean my cupcake too but that will have to wait until later.
Yes I call my vag a cupcake because it’s small, sweet, and mouthwateringly tempting.
I pull my hoodie out of my hobo bag and throw it on over my bra. I throw my shirt into my purse and quickly step into my skirt.
I glance around the space and can’t find my panties anywhere. I don’t have time to look for them so I leave them behind and hightail it out the front door. I barely get three blocks away before I realize that I don’t have on any shoes.
This just isn’t my day!
I’m sure my morning after makeup isn’t making me look any less like a junkie whore. I check the time on my cell and realize that Ava is probably still out with her goatee guy so I can’t call her.
The boys (a group of guys that I hang out with) are probably sleeping off their hangovers so I can’t call one of them either. Cursing under my breath I pull out my cell and call a cab.
I live in a college town known as Sunset Cove, DE and there are only two places to live. You either live downtown (near the college) or you live in the suburbs on the outskirts of town near the water.
I live in the suburbs and I’m dreading the cost of this cab ride. I only live fifteen minutes from downtown but the cabs out here are ridiculously expensive.
After an annoyingly expensive cab ride I walk through my front door and am startled to find Ava sitting on the couch in sweats and a sports bra eating cereal. Mid bite she takes in the look on my face and cautiously says “Hey.”
I don’t know why I’m surprised to see her here since we never break our after party rules.
1. Never bring the guy back to our place.
2. ALWAYS use a condom.
3. Always return or call home by 9 am.
4. NEVER, NEVER, NEVER judge each other about the guy we chose to hook up with.
“Hey,” I sigh.
“Uh oh was he no good?”
“I can’t remember. I’m just happy that we weren’t so drunk that we forgot to use a condom.”
“That’s always something to be happy about.” She declares through a mouth full of sugary goodness.
“What happened after we met the guys?”
“You started flirting with Noah and when I said I was leaving with my guy you said you were staying the night at Noah’s place. When I asked you if you were sure you assured me that you were and would see me in the morning. If you hadn’t showed up in the next twenty minutes I would have called the cops with a copy of his license and tag number.”
Laughing I hug her neck, “I’m lucky to have a friend like you.”
“Damn straight! Now go shower cause you smell like hot funky sex.”
I take my time pulling away from her and skip my way to the bathroom. After a long shower I pull on some comfy sweats and a cami and head to the living room (aka the comfy room).
“Are you feeling better after your night out?”
“I was while I was out, but now I have to concentrate on what I’m going to do.” She nods her head in understanding but her eyes betray her. “Stop worrying,” I huff. “I mean I may not thoroughly enjoy what I’m doing but it will pay the bills until I decide what I want to do.” She nods again but quickly turns her attention to the TV and conveniently becomes absorbed in it.
Ava is the master of avoidance.
She has been this way since we were kids and I can’t help but laugh as I head to the kitchen thinking about the day we met.
****
We met each other one rainy day in the fourth grade when I beat a bully off of her with my umbrella. I was walking home from school when I noticed Cindy pulling on Ava’s pigtails. Cindy was the biggest girl in our class because she had been left behind twice and everyone was afraid of her.
I couldn’t just leave Ava to get beat up so my fingers tightened around my plastic umbrella with rainbows on it and I let it fly. Between my hits and Ava’s kicks we were able to get away from her.
We ran two blocks before we reached my porch. My mom met us on the porch and invited Ava to stay for dinner. Ava called home for permission and we’ve been sharing dinner at each other’s houses since then.
****
I move towards the light colored cabinets with glass fronts and grab a bowl. While holding the bowl I take a moment to appreciate our kitchen. I like our house and the open floor plan but I absolutely love our kitchen.
The glass in the cabinets makes the kitchen the brightest room in the house during the day. At twilight the kitchen reflects orange and pink sunset and at night the lights inside the cabinets give the kitchen a sexy glow. The lower cabinets are the same light brown color minus the glass.
The countertop is light gray granite with flecks of gold glitter in it with a farmhouse sink under a large window overlooking the backyard. The back splash is a mixture of muted and dark gray tile with a splash of black throughout.
The island is where we eat most of our meals and is large enough to fit three stools up to it. The stove is something the realtor called a chef’s stove and is a bit extravagant for two single girls. It has six burners and two of the burners can be turned into a grill with an overhead hood. The appliances are all stainless steel, which the realtor assured us would help sell the place down the road.
I’m actually humming as I go to the pantry for the cereal but once the milk is poured I begin to worry about my career. It’s pretty depressing to attend college and not be able to obtain a job in the career field I worked so hard to get a degree in.
I went to school for English Lit because I love to read, but I was not prepared to be turned down for job after job because the economy sucks and publishers are only taking on unpaid interns.
So for now I am working as a teller at a bank forty hours a week. It pays the bills and keeps me active during those forty hours but it also depresses me.
Sometimes at the end of the week I come home and go straight to my room and curl up in my recliner. During the week I don’t allow myself to think about how depressing my job situation is, but the weekend is different.
I allow myself to wallow for twenty-four hours before pulling myself together and slapping a smile on my face to put everyone else around me at ease. I then look on the Internet for various jobs that I am qualified for and of course they aren’t hiring.
So that brings me to the present, deciding what I want to do with the rest of my life. What will make me happy?
There is no reason to cry over spilled milk so I decide to enjoy the rest of my day. Besides, I have plenty of time later to contemplate the rest of my life. So for now I’ll sit on the couch with my best friend, enjoy my cereal, and laugh at Sponge Bob.