Shattered Edge (21 page)

Dan pulled up to the plane and I hopped out. “Thanks for the ride Dan. Have a nice career.” I didn’t wait for a response but headed up the steps.

When I reached the opening to the aircraft I heard, “You must be Caroline Cole.”

“That’s correct. And you are?”

“Mick Waterson. Welcome aboard. First things first. ID’s.”

He showed me his and I showed him mine. There were two other people on board, one being the sandy haired man from that night in Charleston. He did two long slow blinks, signaling me to act like we’d never met. Hmm, this might be interesting. Even these people, this high up, didn’t know about my change in identity.

“Caroline Cole meet Pete Kowalski. He’s the one that’s running this show. And over there is Jonas Richardson.”

“Pleased to meet you guys.”

Mick said, “Have a seat Caroline and get buckled up. We’re ready to take off.”

We started talking about my thoughts immediately. They kept countering me and I had to hand it to them. Everything had validity. But so did my ideas.

“Look guys, let’s think about it. We have these huge trucks coming over the border filled with all kinds of stuff...lettuce, tomatoes, peppers, what have you. What if the distribution center they’re going to is owned by someone that’s linked to the cartel? What if they have someone on the payroll...so when the inspection occurs, things are missed, overlooked, whatever? It’s not impossible. My other thoughts have to do with how things are shipped. What if there are false bottoms to everything? Enough room to smuggle in kilos of heroin or coke?”

They were all shaking their heads going, “No fucking way. We have drug dogs.”

“Right. I’ve thought about that too. What if they’ve done something to the dogs to mess up their sense of smell? It happens to humans when we get colds. Like inflammation. It screws up our taste and smell. Why can’t they do something to the dogs? Or spray something on the drugs to keep the dogs from finding the scent?”

They all shut up and stared...and stared...and stared. I was getting very uncomfortable by the time Pete finally said something.

“I told you she’d be worth the trip.”

That was the conversation for the rest of the flight. We were on the computers and communicating with veterinarians all over the country trying to figure out what could disable a dog’s sense of smell.

********

We landed in El Paso and headed straight for EPIC (El Paso Intelligence Center). Preston was due to arrive in two hours.

They handed me a stack of folders and told me to figure out which ones had merit. They were talking about the wholesale food distributors in the U.S. that the Mexican produce was being delivered to.

I wanted to throw the folders right back at them. They didn’t believe me. Or at least that’s how I perceived them to feel. Screw it, if these needed reviewing, then that’s what I’d do.

It took me two days before the pattern started to emerge. One company, Mendoza Produce and Mexicana Produce started to look suspicious. When I tracked their deliveries to DFW, two days after every delivery, there would always be a spike in either drug related shootings, arrests or something similar. It kept getting more interesting. These two wholesalers were directly tied to one large distributor, East Coast Wholesaler, that handled grocery chains all over the southeast and east coast.

On the third day, I presented my findings. The shit hit the fan. Preston smiled. So did Pete.

CHAPTER TWENTY SEVEN

Justin

Today would’ve been our wedding day. I couldn’t run fast enough or far enough to get away from those demons. I was on call and wanted to work straight through. I didn’t want to stop for anything. Pearce happened to be on call too, so every now and then, he’d stick his head in and check up on me.

We both had a few minutes over lunch and he took me aside and wanted to know how I was.

“Don’t ask me that today.” I couldn’t stop the tears from dropping onto my cheeks. I didn’t really cry anymore, but the tears were present today. My heart would never mend. There would always be a piece of it missing. I wondered one time if a heart transplant would make it feel better. When people talked about broken hearts, I never knew their chests truly hurt. Mine did...all the
goddamn time. It hurt when I woke up. It hurt when I worked. It hurt when I ran. It hurt when I ate. I’m sure it even hurt then I slept. It would always hurt until the day I died.

My family and friends had been great, but there wasn’t a fucking thing they could do, unless they could bring her back. And we all knew that wasn’t possible. I knew I loved my girl. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I knew she was
the
one
and that there would be no other for me. I just didn’t know how bad I would miss her when she was ripped away so cruelly from me.

Even when other women started approaching me, I knew I’d never be over her. A new nurse at the hospital came up to me one day. She didn’t know about my past, had no idea of the tragedy I was living through. She put her hand on my arm, in a friendly gesture, and my whole body cringed. She looked at me oddly and immediately removed it. I made some lame excuse and hurried away from her. The thought of another woman touching me almost made me sick.

An idea began to take root in my mind. I wasn’t sure about it because Charleston had been my home for my whole life. With the exception of undergrad at Princeton and then my residency at University of Washington in Seattle, I had never any desire to leave Charleston. My feelings were changing. Without Terri and with every little curve in the street, every restaurant, every single thing I looked at here that reminded me of her, I was finding it increasingly difficult to live here.

I dared not broach this subject yet with my family, for when I did, I wanted to be sure about my decision. They would have a sense of duty to try to talk me out of it I was sure. The real question was, where would I go? I’d traveled extensively and had a few places I loved, but I never gave any real thoughts to living there. I would start to do that and maybe do some research too.

My gut twisted up when I thought about leaving here, the only true home I’d ever known. Cutting all ties with my past...with Terri...with my memories of her.

I was suddenly thrown back to that day at Pearce’s wedding as I stood in the front of the church and watched her carefully pick her way down that aisle. I knew she was scared shitless...waiting to stumble, but she never did. She was remarkable. Because of her,
because of the courage and strength she had, I now gave every patient that faced the same kind of recovery, hope. Huge hope. And I told them all about how she overcame every obstacle that was thrown her way. And how she nearly lost that leg. I don’t tell them that she was the love of my life and they don’t see me when I go back to my office and cry like a baby. But after I leave their rooms, they have hope and they believe that they will be able to walk again..

CHAPTER TWENTY EIGHT

Caroline

Six months...six grueling months of relentless investigations, inspections, late nights, sleepless nights, begging Pete to look at something else and we finally had it.

I’d been right. It was both of the suspected Mexican wholesalers. They had somehow created plastic crates with hollowed bottoms that they had filled with heroin, cocaine or meth. They also used a substance that they must have sprayed on the surface of the crates that covered up the scent of the drugs. The dogs had missed it every time. The DEA was analyzing it now and trying to determine exactly what it was. It was quite an ingenious plan too. They were connected to East Coast Wholesaler and when they shut them down, the entire Monterrey Cartel crashed in the United States.

The DEA arrested dozens of high ranking members of the cartel and were also able to grab many of their operatives located in the larger cites that were feeding some of the smaller dealers. It was the largest drug bust in the history of our nation. Millions of dollars worth of heroin, cocaine and methamphetamine were confiscated, along with the money that went along with it.

Immediately following, violence broke out in Mexico, resulting in massive gang wars between the cartels. It appeared that the Monterrey Cartel had been put to rest permanently. That was the good news. The bad news was there would be another one to step in to take its place.

I thought about what this really meant. To most of the people hearing this on the news, they would probably think, “Oh good,” and not think another thing about it. Even if Justin heard of it, he would never know how deeply this had affected his life. How it had changed the two of us forever.

I would have to find some way to pick up the pieces now. For the last six months, this was all I had focused on, pushing all thoughts of Justin aside. Well, that’s only partly true. He was with me all the time. Constantly. At night when I went to sleep, I imagined I could feel his warmth wrapped around me and smell the scent that was all him. I imagined how it felt when he kissed me and sent my heart racing and my blood coursing through my veins. He was always right there...so close, but yet never again would I feel him. Ever.

When I left for El Paso, I thought it would be for a week. Six months later I was boarding the plane to go back to Virginia. I was a woman without a home. I wasn’t sure about what I would do next. Over a year had passed since that awful day. I had been to hell and back in that time and I wasn’t so sure I wasn’t still in hell now.

I sat on the plane and started thinking about me...my feelings...my life. One year had passed and then some. And I still felt like my belly was slashed wide open and my guts were hanging out. I would never get over him. Maybe time would dull the pain. But if the way I felt today was any indication, it would take a hell of a lot of time for that to happen. I had to get out of Virginia. I needed to leave the East Coast altogether. My memories were too vivid here. I’d gone to UVA. And then lived in Charleston the rest of the time. Maybe I’d go out west. I liked Texas. The people were awesome. El Paso was too far from everything though. Maybe Dallas or Austin. Or maybe I should check out Denver or Phoenix. I would give it a try, travel a bit. See the country. It was something I’d always wanted but had never done. When I decided where I wanted to live, then I’d look for a job. One thing I couldn’t ever do again was sell real estate. They’d told me that from the beginning...when they reinvented me, that I could never go back to anything I did before. It was unfortunate, because that was the one thing I loved and was good at too.

I hung around my mom’s place for a few months, and then I decided it was time to make a plan. Preston didn’t like what I was going to do, but I had to do it. Now that the cartel was destroyed, it was relatively safe for me to pop in and do what I had to do, and then leave.

Mom was crazy worried. I told her not to be. I would spend a day, two at the most and be on I-40 heading west before anyone could possibly get wind of it. Most of those people were dead now anyway. Preston, Pete and I talked about it for hours and they finally gave me their okay. They weren’t overjoyed with my decision, but I said, “Someday I hope you’ll understand.”

My Ford Taurus was packed, which really wasn’t saying much because I didn’t own much more than the clothes on my back. Financially I was set. The government had somehow transferred all of our funds to Swiss accounts that were untraceable (well, for anyone but someone in intelligence). Preston had received his trust so he was okay too. The DEA still owed me money. They’d hired me as a consultant and Preston was still trying to get the money from the government. Enough said about that.

********

I pulled into Charleston around four in the afternoon. I didn’t have a hotel room, but I would get one on my way back out of town. I didn’t expect this would take very long. I drove straight to Justin’s house. I didn’t park in his driveway, but I decided to park two blocks away instead.

My heart was pounding and my palms were dripping. I’m sure my shirt under my arms was pretty wet too. I had on jean shorts, flip flops, and a tank top. It was September and balmy. My hair brushed the tops of my shoulders but it was still blonde and I had bangs too. I was thin, much thinner than I used to be.

When I got to the front of his house I couldn’t breathe. I kept walking and went around the block again. I couldn’t catch my breath. My heart continued to do its jackhammer number. Stopping for a second, I put my hand on my chest and found what I was looking for. It had always given me courage and hope. I would finally be passing that on tonight. I bit my lip and tasted blood. Using the little breathing trick that Phil taught me so long ago, I began to feel better.

Blowing out my breath between my teeth, I trudged up the stairs on his porch and rang his doorbell. His Range Rover was parked there so I was pretty sure he was home. But he never answered the door. I sat down on the steps and decided to wait. I’d come this far, I had to complete this mission.

Thirty minutes later, I was still waiting with my head resting against the column. I heard the pounding of feet...those of a runner and I looked up and there he was, coming to a stop. He hadn’t seen me yet. My heart stopped beating as I drank in the sight of him...all six feet three inches of him. His hair was longer...much longer. In fact, it was almost as long as mine. He was also thinner. His cheekbones were more prominent and his lips looked fuller and God help me it was going to take everything I had to keep my hands off of him.

He was messing with his music, taking his ear buds out when he finally noticed me.

“Oh hi. Sorry, I didn’t see you sitting there. Is there something I can help you with?” He flashed me an uneasy smile.

I swallowed the thickness in my throat and bobbed my head a minute. I squeezed my eyes shut forcing back the tears and praying for Divine intervention because I knew I was going to need it.

“Yeah. As a matter of fact there is,” I said as I rose to my feet and walked up to him. “Well, that’s not exactly true. I’m the one who has come here to help you with something.”

He looked at me oddly and asked, “Do I know you?”

I blew out my breath and said very quietly almost whispering, “Yes. Or rather you did.”

“I’m sorry then. You have me at a disadvantage. Your name is?”

I cleared my throat. “It’s Caroline. Caroline Cole.”

“Forgive me. I don’t remember meeting you.” But he narrowed his eyes and cocked his head, as if he were trying to remember me.

“You once knew me as someone else.” I dropped my head and whispered, almost as quiet as the breeze, “You once knew me as Terri.” Then I lifted my eyes to his.

The iPod slipped out of his fingers and crashed to the brick driveway. He stared at me. Then his eyes darkened with anger and he asked in a voice laced with steel, “How dare you come on to my property and say such things? I don’t know who you are or what your game is, but get the hell out of here.”

I was prepared for this. I pulled the necklace from beneath my tank top out and slipped it over my head.

Tears were raining down my cheeks when I spoke the words, “There are so many things I need to say to you and I know what you’re thinking, but please hear me out.” My voice was soft so he had to strain to hear. I let the necklace dangle from my hand. He saw the engagement ring and the stone from the necklace he’d given me for Christmas.

“Where did you get those?” he asked, his eyes widened in shock.

“You gave me this ring at sunrise on Valentine’s Day at Amanyara when you asked me to marry you.  You told me that I put the beat into your heart and the spirit into your soul. You gave me the necklace for Christmas right over there,” I said as I pointed to the upper piazza. I had to pause for a moment because I was nearing my breaking point. I bit down on my lower lip, but I dared not look at him for I knew I would certainly lose it. Then I continued in a soft whisper, “I didn’t die but they had to make it look like I did. My brother was an undercover agent and was working inside that huge drug cartel that was busted up a few months back. They told him he had to kill me and my mom. They faked our deaths but
you
couldn’t know about it because they would’ve killed you too.” I lifted the hem of my shirt to wipe my face. I was stupid and forgot about bringing any Kleenex.

I took a deep breath and blew it out. “I came here to tell you the truth. They didn’t want me to, but I felt since the cartel was busted, the worst was over. I can’t stay. Terri is dead. No one can ever know I was here. My life in Charleston is truly over. I’m a girl without a home. But Justin, you were so wrong about me,” my voice c
aught and I had to stop again. I wiped my eyes again with the heel of my hand. “I wasn’t strong at all. I was weak...so very weak. I broke...shattered really...into tiny fragments when they told me what I had to do and how you couldn’t know the truth.” I paused again, trying to collect myself. I needed to pull it together here. The pain in my heart was nearly overwhelming so I put my hand on my chest and clenched the top of my tank top, as if that would somehow ease it. I took I another deep, cleansing breath and continued. “I ended up in a mental hospital. This whole thing nearly destroyed me. You will...” I had to stop to breathe. The tears were rushing down my face now, dripping off my chin onto my shirt. My head was bent because it wasn’t possible for me to look at his beautiful face right now. “I love you...I will always love you and you will always be in my heart. I came here today to bring you these. I wanted you to have them because that girl, Terri, doesn’t exist anymore.” I took his hand and put the necklace with the ring and pendant in it and then I folded his fingers around it. “I’m so very sorry. For all the pain I’ve caused and for ruining your life.”

I started to make my way toward the sidewalk when his voice stopped me.

“Why do you look so different? What happened to your scars?”

I walked back to him and whispered, “Would you mind if we stepped inside?” I wiped my face again with the hem of my shirt.

He just stared at me.

“Please? I’m still not sure if it’s totally safe talking about this out here in the open.” He didn’t say anything. “Maybe in your car then?” I pinched my lower lip between my index finger and my thumb. And then I looked around, just to make certain no one was around us.

He just kept staring. Well, he wasn’t going to make this easy.

I walked closer to him and stood on my tiptoes. Leaning in, I whispered, “They did plastic surgery on me when they changed my identity. They wanted to make a lot of other changes but I wouldn’t allow all of them.”

I turned to leave again and about the time I made it to the sidewalk, he asked me, “Why now?”

I went back to him and pleaded, “Look, I know you don’t believe me, but I’m putting us both at risk out here. Please, can we go inside or better yet, let’s go up to your office and get on your computer and I’ll show you some stuff that might explain things.”

“How do you know my office is upstairs?”

I grabbed his hand and tugged him up the steps. Then I moved the large pot under which he’d hidden a key. I picked it up and unlocked the door and disarmed his security system.

I relocked and reset the alarm and pulled him into the kitchen. “You need to stop hiding a key out there. It’s dangerous. I’m sorry to be such a bully, but I don’t want you to get shot and killed. Me, I don’t give a flying fuck about. But I haven’t gone through goddamn hell for eighteen months because of you, just to come back here and see your ass get shot.”

“What do you mean, ‘because of you?’”

“They told me they would kill you Justin. I didn’t care if they killed me. You, on the other hand, were an entirely different matter.”

“So tell me the whole story.”

I did. Twice. I’m not sure when it started to sink in, but it did. He was angry at Preston for getting everyone involved in this mess.

“He couldn’t help it. He never planned on it.”

“Terri, he...”

I stopped him. “Justin, stop it right now!” I yelled.

“What!”

I got up in his face and put my hand on his chest. “You can’t EVER call me Terri again. Not when we’re alone. Not when we’re in a crowd. Not even if we’re in the middle of nowhere. You don’t understand these cartels and how they operate. They’re horrific...your worst nightmares. Promise me now. I’m Caroline. Pearce can’t know. Lexi can’t know. No one Justin. I mean no one. Are we clear?”