Shattered Heart (The Hart Series) (14 page)

I pick myself
off the floor and slink to the mirror and instantly roll my eyes.  No one looks
good after puking their insides out, but I look like Satan himself rolling out
of bed, in hell.  My skin blotchy from crying hysterically, my emerald green
eyes bloodshot and puffy, and to make matters worse my normal glowing
complexion is too pale to pass for a healthy person.  Let alone a sane one. 

I grip the
counter loosely and take cleansing breaths in and out.  I focus only on my
chest rising and falling, trying to get my nerves under control before I leave
this bathroom.  I must look like a lunatic right now, but as soon as I step one
foot out of this bathroom, they will all know something’s wrong.  And right
now, I don’t have the energy.  Not, right now.

With a battered
sigh, I wipe my eyes dry and round my shoulders before facing the madness
awaiting me downstairs.  I can do this.  All I have to do is grab Oliver, say
goodbye to everyone, skirt around my hasty retreat, and leave.  Easy-peasy.

Of course it
wouldn’t be that easy.  I don’t get far into the hallway before I run into Alex
sitting on the stairs, waiting for me.  He’s
always
waiting for me.  On
stairs, no less.  Sensing my approach, he glances behind him.  He tilts his
head in curiosity as I approach and sit next to him.  That’s right, I sat next
to him.  Obviously he has something to say, something he feels I need to hear. 
Unfortunately, I’m assaulted with the smell of the amber liquid wafting from
his small glass as I lay my head on his shoulder in defeat.

I know I told
him to give me time and I’m being exceptionally selfish, but I need a moment of
delusion; just a brief second where I can bask in the security and peace that
being next to him affords me.  I, however, am not so far in lala land that his
drinking doesn’t bother me.  “You shouldn’t drink,” I whisper, nuzzling myself
closer against his shoulder.

Alex lifts the
glass to his mouth, letting the last remnants of liquor pass through his tight
lips.  “It dulls the pain.  It’s either I sit here and drink until I’m numb or
I go out and bury myself in faceless women.  You pick.” 

I wince.  The
thought of Alex with anyone else is absolutely repulsive.

“I guess alcohol
doesn’t seem so bad when you put it that way,” I whisper again, not wanting
anyone downstairs to hear our conversation.  He chuckles.  I guess he found
that funny, but I’m completely serious.  I’ll apologize to Alex’s liver later
after I’ve figured out what to do with our
situation. 
I continue to
lean against him, fighting the need to wrap my arms around his bicep and cling
to him for comfort. 

With Oliver’s
boisterous laugh echoing through the entry way of the dining room, I shrink
even further into Alex.  I know I should say something, anything, that will
help ease some of this tension, but I have no words.  Instead, Alex breaks our
silence.  “You have to know how much I can’t stand that he’s here.  Honestly
Hart, I’m not sure what hurts more…the month you ignored me or,” Alex lifts his
hand pointing to the dining room, “you trying to replace me with that dick.” 

I remain quiet. 
There are no words that can express how sorry I am that I’ve ruined this man I
adore.  With every fiber of my soul, I know he is hurting, and it crushes me
deep.  Knowing my own soul has already been broken, along with my heart, I
decide there is nothing left to shatter and do exactly the opposite of what my
mind is screaming at me not to do.  And even though his bicep tenses at the
intimate contact, I hook my arm through his, close my eyes, rest against him
with my full weight and trust we will make it out the other end.  Wherever that
may be.

We sit for
several minutes before I feel his lips against my forehead and hear the sigh. 
After everything we’ve gone through, everything I’ve put him through, he’s
still too kind for his own good.  One minute I’m giving into my heart and the
next pushing him away. 
God, how unfair I’ve been…how unfair I’m being.
 
Constantly giving into my needs regardless of how he’s feeling. 

Alex kisses my
hair and inhales my scent before resting his cheek against the top of my head. 
“I like you like this.”

“Like what?” I
mumble.

“Needing me…it’s
nice to feel like you want me here.”  I clutch his arm tighter, continuing to
ignore the pain radiating in my chest. 
If you only knew how much I do need
you.

The sound of a
throat being cleared causes my eyes to shoot open, ending my brief moment of
tranquility.  Standing at the foot of the stairs with his hands tucked deep
inside his pockets, Oliver rocks back and forth.  “You were taking so long in
the bathroom; I figured I would check on you.” 

“Sorry, I wasn’t
feeling so good.”  I remove my arm from Alex’s grasp and straighten myself
before standing.  Alex bows his head, looking at his empty glass while I move
myself away from him.

Holding out his
hand, Oliver helps me descend the last few steps between us.  “You ready to
go?” 

Grasping my arm
I feel myself tugged backwards, Alex glaring at Oliver.  “You can leave on your
own.  You know where the door is.”  He points towards the door with his chin,
still clutching my elbow.

“We came
together.”  Oliver takes a step closer.  “We leave together.” 

“Why are you
pushing it, Prescott?”  I haven’t moved since the original tug, and can feel
Alex’s body against my side.  His fingers firmly grip my arm, not out of anger,
but more out of desperation.  His hand is trembling against my skin.

“Why don’t you
ask Elyssa what she wants?”  Oliver takes another step.  Both men are
sandwiching me, neither backing down.

I stare up at
both of them and realize that I’m the only one that can defuse the situation. 
Again.  But, I can’t, no I won’t be in the middle of this feud.  Not again, not
tonight.  And because I still feel nauseous and am in no mood to deal with
their brooding behavior, I push past Oliver, leaving both men on the stairs.

“What I
want
is for both of you to grow up and stop this competition!  I am not some prize
in a stupid game between the two of you.”  Oliver’s eyes widen in shock as Alex
winces.  “I feel like crap.  What I
want
is to go home, which entails me
taking you home.”  I point to Oliver.  My emotions get the best of me as I
watch Alex sink back to sit on the stairs.  Once again, I’m overcome with the
guilt.  But this time, the guilt will have to stay, because I can’t deal with
this right now.

With tears
threatening to brim over, I retreat to the dining area.  Trevor and Travis are
chatting with Bryan when Rachel returns from the kitchen to clear the table. 
All three men stand in unison to help her.  “Rach, I feel like crap.  Do you
need me to help clean up?”

Rachel walks
towards me placing the back of her hand against my forehead after disposing the
dishes on the table.  “You’re not running a fever, but you definitely feel
clammy.  Was it the food?”  All three men snap their heads in my direction.

No Rach, I’m
impregnated by the guy you invited to Thanksgiving dinner.  You know…the same
guy who used his penis as a commodity and fucked his way up the corporate
ladder. 
“No
Rach.  I haven’t been feeling well for a few days now.  I just want to go home
and rest.”

“Do you need to
go to the urgent care?  I’ll take you.”  With nothing but concern on her face,
Rachel brings me into a hug, Bryan only inches away strokes my back in
comfort.  I return the gesture and squeeze her tightly wishing I could talk to
her about what is really going on.  What I wouldn’t give to tell her about
Arianna and confess how much the hatred for that woman runs deep within me
now.  I wish we could both make voodoo dolls and stab little pins into her skull
and chest in hopes of causing her as much pain as she has caused me.  Oh, and
I’d mention somewhere in that lovely story that I am pretty sure I’m pregnant. 

“Don’t worry;
I’m sure all I need is a little rest.  I’m going to head home if you don’t need
me.”  Releasing me, Rachel nods her head making me promise to call her if I
need anything. 

Only a few more
goodbyes and I can get out of here and get the test.  I peek over at Oliver and
nod towards the door.  Thankfully, he takes the hint and heads off in that
direction.  He must have already said his goodbyes because no one even notices
that he left the room.  Or at least they don’t say anything more about him.

Both Travis and
Trevor pull me tight against them, the latter keeping me in an embrace longer
than necessary.  In his sexy Trevor voice he proceeds to tell me he knows how
to cheer me up from this disastrous day.  “Every Friday night is Ladies Night
at work.  It’s something new the club is trying, to bring in more people.  It
would mean the world to me, and my boss,” he pauses eyeing Alex as he makes his
presence known by a tight growl, “if you could let your friends know and, you
know, maybe come one night.  Maybe even bring some fliers to work?”

When Trevor is
done with his very effective persuasion tactics, he finally releases me.  I
look up at him and cock my head.  That was a little too weird.  One, why the
long embrace?  I don’t know Trevor that well, but I wouldn’t have expected him
to be so over affectionate.  And really, all he had to do was ask.  Why the
long drawn out promotion?  Who am I kidding; I know the answer without even
having to think twice.  Alex.  Something’s off between the two of them, and I
can’t quite put my finger on it.  And two, did Alex just growl? 

 “I don’t know,
Trevor…”  Pushing out his bottom lip, he begins to beg silently.

“Ugh…fine!  But
you owe me!”  He brings me into another bear hug, squeezing all the air out of
my lungs.

“Thank you!  You
are the most wonderful woman I know!  I’d ask Rachel, but Bryan might castrate
me!” he chuckles pointing towards my sister.

“Hey, I’m
technically not married yet!  I can still go out and party like a rock star,”
Rachel jokes from the end of the table as she cuts the rest of the turkey up
into slices for packaging. 

Bryan comes up
from behind her, nestling into her neck as he places kisses on her nape and
cheek.  “Don’t you even think about it.  I’m the only one that gets to see
these moves.”  Rachel giggles in delight.

My attention
turns to Alex, both hands touching the top of the archway, body leaning into
the room.  His shirt is untucked and when he stretches his torso, his shirt
rides up just enough to show off his taut upper body which takes up the entire
entry.  The muscles of his abdomen contracts making my mouth water with want. 
Is
it healthy for me to ogle my ex-boyfriend, because damn, he looks…lick-able. 

Sensing the
energy shift, Trevor chimes back in with a wink, “I brought Ely up to speed
about the Ladies Night at the club.  She agreed to party it up
and
bring
all of her girlfriends.  Right?”  I nod. 

Thanks Trevor. 
Go ahead and tell my crazy jealous ex about the possibility of another guy even
talking to me.  I’m sure he’s going to jump for joy at this news. 

Just as I
thought, Alex doesn’t seem happy at all.  His jaw clenches while his now beady
blue eyes shoot daggers at Trevor.  “Hey man, it’s just a night out.  No
biggie,” Trevor tries to calm the storm raging inside Alex.

Without skipping
a beat, Alex walks towards me.  His eyes rest on my legs longer than they
should, shutting everyone else in the room out and making me pant with need. 
His deep penetrating stare set off my quivering body.  Lucky for me, my sister
is a genius and must sense the awkward moment and suggests for the boys to join
her in the kitchen to assist her in “cleaning up.”  And when I say awkward, I
mean for them, not us.

“You leaving?”
Alex asks, stepping one foot closer.

I nod only
slightly, “I’m not feeling well and I need to drop Oliver off at his house.”

“There has to be
a bus route somewhere around here,” he smirks, taking another step closer to
me. 

Our bodies are
practically conjoined as he reaches up and brushes his fingers over my chin,
tilting my head even farther back so we don’t lose the connection.  I don’t
know what he wants me to say, but I have to make sure he knows.  “There’s
nothing going on, Alex.” 

“I’m trying to
be level headed about this.  I really am.  I just hate that fucker.”  I giggle
out of sheer frustration and Alex finally flashes his dimpled cheeks.  He brushes
his thumb over my face.  “Do I get a hug goodbye or are hugs only for perverts
like Trevor?”

Reaching up, I
place my hands around his neck while he reaches down and wraps his arms around
my waist, lifting me up into a tight embrace.  He runs his nose along the
length of my neck starting below my ear and down to my clavicle, sending
shivers throughout my entire body.  I sigh in reaction as my body conforms to
his.

“So, its okay
for Trevor to hug me but you can’t stand me giving Oliver a ride home?”  I
mumble against his shoulder, trying to lighten the situation.  Alex still has
his arms wrapped around me, but I feel him tense at Oliver’s name.

“I never said it
was okay.  But there is a difference between Trevor and Oliver.  Trevor knows
you’re mine.  Oliver just doesn’t care.”