Slowly We Trust (29 page)

“And more. So much more.”

We did another few laps to finish out the song and then Will steered me over toward the arcade where there were a few benches.

“Wait here.” He zoomed away and left me there. Um, what? I sat and spun the wheels on my skates and watched a little girl with plastic strap-on skates toddle around while her dad held her hand and told her she was doing a great job.

That would be Emily someday, only Leo would be doing the hand-holding and encouraging. Now that I knew him better, I had no doubt that Eddie would make a good father some day. Apparently, my drunken decision to choose him to be Emily’s biological father was a sound one.

I was so distracted thinking about Emily that I almost didn’t see Will skating up to me with a huge cluster of balloons and two presents in pink boxes with enormous bows on them.

“Happy Sex Partner Appreciation Day!” He whispered the word “sex” so the kids didn’t hear.

I wanted to cry again, but this time I was able to suppress it.

“Open them,” he commanded, handing me the presents and sitting down next to me with the balloons.

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” I said, taking the first present and tearing open the paper. I hoped it wasn’t anything too big. He’d already outdone himself.

“Okay, so this is sort of a future present,” he said before I lifted the top off the box. “Like, you probably won’t use it now, but I thought of you when I saw it and I knew I wanted to get it for you. But you can take it back if you hate it.” Sweet rambling Will. I put my hand on his mouth to stop him from making excuses for the present that I knew that I was going to love no matter what.

“Hush. I love it already.” I pulled the top off the box and found a black leather briefcase. It was thin and light, but had a sturdy handle and clasps.

“It’s for your future legal career,” Will said softly as I brushed my hand on the soft leather.

“Thank you so much, Will. I don’t know what to say.”

“Well, you could say ‘give me the next present, asshole.’” I set the briefcase aside and went for the next present. I opened that one a little slowly and found another box. And then I opened that box and found another box. I gave Will a look, but he just had a smug smile on his face. He was messing with me.

I finally got down to a fairly small box and opened that to find a necklace. A gold lightning-bolt necklace.

“I had to get a little something Harry in there. But this doesn’t scream I’M A HARRY POTTER FAN. It’s sweet and pretty and sexy. Like you.” He motioned for me to turn around and I had that classic moment when I held my hair off my neck and he clasped the necklace for me. I happened to settle right between my breasts. I looked down at it and wondered if the length of the necklace was intentional, or just a coincidence.

The former was confirmed when I turned back to Will and his eyes went right to that area and lit up.

“Perfect,” he said softly.

“You have a one-track mind, Will Anders.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He stood up and took my hands again as “Hungry Eyes” started to play.

“I’m pretty sure that they won’t let you skate around with this many balloons, so let’s find a place to put them.” We were able to store the balloons in one of the back rooms and Will and I went back out to skate.

I had the world’s greatest sex partner.

Will and skated for a while longer, including doing the Chicken Dance with all the kids, played a few games of pinball and air hockey (which he won all rounds of, despite him trying to let me win) and devoured pizza, fries, shakes and frosted brownies.

“I don’t think I can move,” I said, putting my hand on my stomach. I really shouldn’t have eaten that much, knowing I was going to the batting cages later. How was I ever going to manage that?

“Agreed. Why didn’t you stop me from eating that fourth slice of pizza after I already finished my shake and a brownie? Why is unlimited pizza a thing?” Will moaned.

“Hey, I’m not going to stop you from doing what you want to do. This is your show. And why didn’t you stop me from getting extra fries? Are you trying to make my ass bigger?”

He gasped.

“No, that thought has never crossed my mind. Never ever. Nope.” He shook his head slowly back and forth. “I like your butt just as it is. I wouldn’t change a thing.”

“Suuuurrrrreeeee.” I somehow got myself upright and shuffled with my skates to where Will had put our shoes.

Getting the balloons into the truck’s cab proved to be a bit of a challenge, and he couldn’t see out the back window, but we both managed to get ourselves in.

“The upside is, if we get in an accident, we don’t even need airbags. The balloons will cushion the crash,” Will said, punching one of the balloons in front of his face.

“True,” I said, moving one as well.

“So, best surprise ever?” he said as he struggled to back out of his parking space.

“Best surprise ever.” It really was. Now I was feeling lame about my surprise. “I don’t know how I’m going to top that.”

“I know. I’m really good at this surprise thing. Who knew? I never did anything this romantic for any girl before. I never wanted to. But now I’m already planning your birthday. I hope you’re prepared, because there might be actual fireworks.” They were legal in Maine now for consumers to buy. There was even a new store selling them right off campus, which sounded like a bad idea all around.

“You know by making your surprises so awesome, it means that I feel obligated to try and outdo you and I don’t know if I’m up to the challenge. It’s a lot of pressure,” I said.

“You could always give me, you know.”

I kept my eyes straight ahead. “No, I’m not familiar with what you’re referring to, could you be more specific?”

“Oh, you know what I mean. Especially when you do that thing with your tongue and then you put your finger –”

“Okay, I got it. Loud and clear.” For some reason, hearing about the sexy things I did with Will when we were in bed made me blush outside the confines of the bedroom.

“So where are we headed?” he said, pulling out of the parking lot and turning toward campus.

“Well, you’ll need to pull over first.” He gave me a look, but pulled the truck over. “And now you need to get out and switch seats with me.”

“That’s not going to be easy, Aud. But I’ll do it for you.”

We switched seats, battling the balloons the whole time. Once he was in his seat, I made him turn around and I put the blindfold on him.

“Yes, I’m totally stealing your thunder and using the blindfold. This is also payback for earlier.”

He whined, but I got the blindfold on him and then it was time to actually drive the truck. It took me a few tries to get the finicky gearshift in the right spot. This could be an interesting trip.

“I can hear you hurting my truck,” Will said as the truck made a really horrible sound.

“Please work with me,” I whispered to the steering wheel. “You want to make Will happy, don’t you?”

“I can hear you talking to her,” he said, fiddling with the blindfold.

“Stop that. She and I are going to get along fine.” The truck made a protesting noise as if to add a “hell” to the “no.”

I freaked out the entire time Audrey drove my truck. Not that I didn’t trust her, because I definitely did. I’d trust her with my life. My truck, however, was another story.

“Please don’t hurt her,” I prayed under my breath.

“I heard that. And it’s fine because we’re here.” With a horrible sound that was like my truck’s heart getting ripped out, she turned the engine off.

“Wait there.” I waited and she got out and did the same routine with me that I’d done earlier with her.

“I feel like a total dork.” She laughed as I stumbled my way toward what I hoped wouldn’t be the edge of a cliff.

“That’s exactly how I felt a little while ago. Payback is a bitch.” I’d asked for this. I really had.

As soon as we got through the door I heard clanging. It sounded familiar and it only took me a second to realize she’d brought me to the batting cages just off campus.

“I fucking love you, Audrey.” It wasn’t the classiest way to say it, but I didn’t think she’d care.

“I fucking love you back, William.” With that, she whipped off the blindfold and revealed the indoor batting cages.

“Now if I suck, you can’t make fun of me. That’s my only rule,” she said, grinning from ear to ear.

“You’re not going to suck. Not with me teaching you. Come on.”

“Okay, you need to lean a little this way and put your shoulder like this,” I said, standing behind Audrey and moving her body into the proper batting position. It gave me an excuse to put my hands all over her in public. She was definitely enjoying it because she kept leaning into me and purposely not posing the way I instructed, so I had to move her.

“I hope you’re enjoying this as much as I am,” I said in her ear, before kissing the side of her neck and causing her to inhale sharply.

“No, I’m hating this. I never, ever want to do this again. Ever.” She backed up into me and wiggled her hips back and forth. Shit, if she did that much longer, I could give her another bat to hold.

“Okay, I’m going to go and start it. You ready?”

She nodded and bit her lip.

“Sure. Yeah. I’m ready. I let hard objects fly at my face all the time. It’s cool.” She had a helmet on (which she looked adorable in), but she was definitely still freaking out.

“I won’t let anything happen to you, I promise.” I stood back and waited. The first ball came and she swung and missed.

“It’s okay. Just focus.” She swung and missed again, but she was getting closer. The third ball made contact with the bat with a satisfying clang. She turned around and threw a grin over her shoulder at me.

“Don’t get too cocky, slugger.”

“I’ll get as cocky as I want.” God, I loved it when she said that word.

She hit a few more balls and then it was my turn.

Her ringtone blasted from her purse, which she’d set on the bench where I’d been watching her.

“Hold up, let me see who that is.” I put my own helmet on and took the bat from her as she dashed to catch the call before it ended.

Her eyes went wide with shock as she looked at the screen. Wow. I turned and waited. Her eyes flashed toward me and she turned her back and put her finger in her ear so she could hear whoever it was.

I couldn’t see or hear her voice, and clearly she wanted privacy, but I was dying to know who it was. Probably her mother.

She shook her head and then she put the phone down. I could see her shaking from several feet away. Shit.

I dropped the bat and jogged over to her.

“Aud?”

Eddie had the results, but he didn’t want to tell me over the phone. He wanted to do it in person and I couldn’t talk him out of coming to where I was. I gave him the address of the batting cages and he said he’d be over soon.

I could feel Will watching me, and I had no idea what I was going to say. How I was going to explain Eddie showing up.

“Aud?” His worried voice and his hand on my shoulder made me turn around.

“What’s wrong? Did your mom call?” I opened my mouth, but I couldn’t find my voice. I’d lost it somewhere.

“Seriously, you have to talk to me. I know you have some shitty stuff in your past, but you can trust me. You know you can trust me. I’m not going anywhere. Even if you try to break up with me, I’m always going to be there for you. No matter what. I’m your friend first. So talk to me.” He’d begged me so many times to trust him, to tell him, to talk to him.

I just . . . I couldn’t.

“I need to sit.” Will walked me a few steps backward and I collapsed on the bench. Ruined. This whole thing was ruined, and I’d been the one to ruin it.

Will rubbed my back in circles as the noise of other people hitting fake home runs and celebrating echoed around us.

I took off the batting helmet and rested my head in my hands. I’d cried earlier when Will had surprised me, but now I couldn’t.

“I fucked up, Will. I fucked everything up. Why did you have to fall for me?” I’d asked myself that so many times.

“It’s okay. Whatever it is. Remember how cool I was with the whole Eddie thing? I’ve told you. Whatever it is, I can take it.”

I always thought his words would break my heart, but somehow it still beat in my chest. The traitor.

“I just want you to be happy,” he said.

“I know you do.”

He sat with me as I breathed in and out and tried to figure how I’d made such a mess of everything. I’d tried to do what I thought was right, but it had been very, very wrong.

“Audrey?” Eddie’s voice hit me light a lightning bolt. I stood without intending to and walked toward him, completely ignoring Will.

Eddie already had tears streaming down his face and my traitorous heart stopped completely.

He reached for my hands when I got to him.

“I’m a match. I’m a match.”

I fell into his arms and finally, finally broke.

What. The. Fuck?!? She’d run to him like he was her long lost love, returning from the dead. It was almost like a movie, minus the soundtrack and the slow motion.

I just watched as he said something to her and she threw herself on him and started crying. He cried. They cried together.

Obviously, there was much more to this story than the two of them sleeping together once. Was this what Aud said she’d screwed up?

Was she—? Were they—?

I stood and watched, unable to move, unable to go toward them and confirm the fears that had worked their way into my mind.

No, it couldn’t be true. She wouldn’t cheat on me. It wasn’t possible. No, no, no.

I waited for hours or minutes. I wasn’t sure which. It felt like both.

I watched as Eddie brushed the tears from her eyes and held her close, rubbing her back.

I watched as she held onto him as if she was lost in the ocean and he was her life preserver.

I watched as girl I loved shared a moment with someone who wasn’t me.

Every time I heard the sound of a bat meet a ball in the cages around me, I pictured one of those bats hitting my heart and smashing it. Over. And over.

Audrey finally moved away from Eddie and looked over her shoulder, searching. She found my eyes and I waited.

She said something to Eddie and he let go of her. As she walked toward me, I wondered what she would say. How she would tell me. And how I would survive it.

“I . . . I have something to tell you,” she said, wiping her eyes again.

“Yes. You do.”

He was a match. The words kept repeating over in my head constantly. Eddie was a match and Emily was going to be okay. They’d already set up an appointment for him to take some further tests before the donation could go forward, but everything was in motion.

She was going to live. My daughter was going to live and everything was going to be okay. After Eddie and I cried and he told me everything that was going to happen, I realized that I’d completely abandoned Will and he had no idea what was going on.

I turned around to find him and when I met his eyes, I realized what this looked like. I’d just been upset about screwing something up and here I was, running and hugging and crying on a boy I’d told him I’d slept with.

Shitfuck. The hurt in his eyes was palpable as I walked toward him. I had to tell him what was going on so he didn’t get the wrong idea. I wished I wasn’t the idiot who put it there.