Something Had to Give (22 page)

Back at the apartment, it crossed my mind to see if Eric had called back. I really didn’t want to be annoyed or angry if there wasn’t a message. As I was changing clothes, it hit me that I had been smiling at Jason and making a big deal about his good looks like I was a single person. I knew that wasn’t right for me to do and told myself that I would stop no matter how hard it was. After procrastinating I finally picked up the phone to check messages. My heart jumped when the automated voice said there was one new message even though I knew there was a chance that it could be someone else leaving a message for Shanna. Holding my breath as I pressed 1 to play the message, I was relieved to hear Eric’s voice. His voice sounded normal, but sad at the same time. The message was cut and dry and I hung up the phone feeling annoyed. I didn’t understand why he was so angry with me. I had encouraged him as much as I could to but he didn’t seem to want to do much but lay around all summer. He couldn’t be mad at me for wanting to do more with my summer. Despite my frustration, I called Eric back, knowing that it was likely he wasn’t doing much with his day and yet and still, there still was no answer. I didn’t bother to leave a message. What was the point? I was just done calling.

I didn’t really expect Eric to call back, but I was hopeful that he would. When another day passed and I didn’t hear from him, I told myself I wasn’t going to keep calling. I tried not to let it bother me, but it did and I wondered if I had messed up when I decided not to leave a message previously. Things were getting so complicated with him and as much as it bothered me that we weren’t talking, I felt like it was more stressful chasing after him. Despite what was going on with me personally, I tried to stay in good spirits that night while Shanna and Craig were up to what seemed to be their normal drinking shenanigans. After about twenty minutes, I was over it. It was very early to be going to bed, but I didn’t care; I had to get away from them. Luckily they didn’t give me too much grief. I went on to my room to lay down with a book I had picked up from the library earlier out of sheer boredom. I set my alarm and opened to page one of a book I hadn’t read in years:
The Count of Monte Cristo.

The alarm went off the next morning, which was the morning I was to start work. I was still holding the book open and the light was still on from when I was reading. Apparently I had only gotten to page ten before I fell asleep. I felt refreshed though, which I figured was a good thing since I would be spending a lot of time on my feet for the day. When I went out my room to take a shower, I was stopped dead in my tracks at the state of the living room. I wasn’t sure when the pizza came, but they ordered one and left it sitting out on the coffee table. Beside the box was an empty vodka bottle, a half-finished bottle of tequila and numerous beer cans. It seemed like way too much for just the two of them to drink. Did I sleep through them having people over too? The light and the TV were still on as well and the random articles of clothes made me nervous for what I would find in the bathroom. Fortunately, it was all clear and I was able to shower and brush my teeth without anyone banging on the door to throw up. Heading back to my room and once again seeing the state of the living room made me wonder what Daddy would say to all this. When did this drinking start and was it because of Craig? On my way out the door, I turned off the light and TV. It wasn’t until I was almost to the door when I saw that something had spilled on the carpet. From the smell I could tell it was beer that no one had bothered to clean up. I just shook my head and left.

It was already warm outside, but there was a little breeze. I had no idea what to expect from traffic so I left early. It turned out that there was no traffic at that time on Saturday mornings, so I was at work in no time with twenty minutes to spare before my shift started. I had skipped breakfast at Shanna’s since I was disgusted by the condition of the apartment and wanted to beat traffic. I was glad to see a bagel shop was open just a few doors down from H&M. I sat outside with my cinnamon raisin bagel and orange juice and enjoyed the little time I had to just sit and people watch. It was about a quarter after 9 that I saw a grey Honda Civic parking and Jason getting out of the driver seat. He wasn’t dressed in anything spectacular but still looked good. I tried to fight back a smile and to get my heart to beat normal, but I couldn’t hide my excitement that he was going to be training me.

I arrived at the door with five minutes to spare. My breakfast had been done but I didn’t want to show up at the door too early and seem overly eager. It was a good thing since the door was locked. It was 9:35am before an associate realized I was out there waiting to get in.

“Hi there. Sorry, everyone usually calls when they are at the door. You must be our new person Cheryl.” The girl who answered the door was a bubbly girl. She seemed to have the perfect personality for retail, even at 9:30 in the morning.

“Yup, that’s me.” I tried to match her enthusiasm, but I was a little disappointed that Jason had sent her to greet me instead of coming himself.

“Well welcome aboard, I’m Felicity and I’m one of the assistant managers.”

“Thanks, I’m glad to be here.”

I stayed a few steps behind Felicity so that I could look around at what was going on. Mainly, I wanted to see if Jason was around. I only saw three other employees hanging up clothes and straightening up. I followed her to the back room, where she had a desk cleared off for me that was set up in front of a TV. There were clothes, hangers, boxes, and stuff everywhere. It didn’t understand how anyone was able to find what they needed among such madness. I hoped that organizing the mess wouldn’t be a part of my training. Most of my day was scheduled for watching training videos and then maybe a few hours on the floor. It was most certainly not what I expected. The only good thing was that this training area happened to be right across from Jason’s office. He was on the phone with his back to me and seemed to be really into the conversation. I wondered what could be so important on a Saturday morning.

I was halfway through the first video fighting to stay awake, when the door to Jason’s office opened causing me to jump. Apparently, the jump was significant enough for Jason to notice because when I turned around he had a smirk on his face.

“Did I scare you?”

He had such a gorgeous smile and smelled amazing. I wanted to snuggle up to him, but I was able to refrain and gave a little smile responding, “Yeah, it scared me just a little.” It seemed like such a stupid response, but I was caught off guard and trying to keep my cool. It was the only thing I could think of to say.

“I know those videos are really boring. Unfortunately, they are part of the training. I’ll try to get you on the floor with Felicity shortly so we don’t bore you to death on your first day.”

“That sounds good.”

“Oh, I bet. We don’t want you leave today and never come back, so we will do our best to take good care of you.”

I smiled at his last response as he turned to make his way out onto the floor. Was he secretly flirting with me? I had to remind myself that I allegedly still had a boyfriend and even though he was being a jerk at the moment, I had to respect our relationship. I once again made a promise to myself to cut out the smiling and obsessing. I was there to do a job. Besides, someone who had a good job and looked as good as he did had to have a significant other. I figured he was also too old for me. I had a guess in my head that he was probably late twenties or early thirties. Gross! No way I could date someone one that much older than me. What would my family say? I could only imagine the looks I would get from them if I popped up to holiday dinners with a guy ten years or older than me. It would never fly.

Felicity came to rescue me around lunchtime to see how I was doing and to tell me to go on lunch. She looked frazzled by this point. Her hair was wild all over her head and she was visibly sweating. Yet, she was still in the same bubbly mood that she was in when I got there. When I walked out there wasn’t a big crowd like I expected. It was hard to understand why Felicity was sweating so badly. I wasn’t sure where I wanted to go for lunch but I knew I had to choose quickly since I only had thirty minutes. It hardly seemed like enough time to eat but I was more than happy to have a break from watching the training videos. I decided on a sub from Jason’s Deli and enjoyed the warm summer sun while I ate. I came back to work to an absolute mad house. I almost wanted to walk back outside and make sure I had walked into the right place. Where did all the people come from? I didn’t know where to go, so I headed back to my training area when Felicity stopped me.

“Hey, was lunch OK Cheryl?” She was yelling out from behind the cash register.

“Yeah, it was fine.”

“Ok, great. You can set your purse down and come on back out. We could use you out here.”

I had no clue what I was getting myself into, but I was glad to be getting away from the videos. Back on the floor, I worked with Felicity hanging up new merchandise and when she was called to handle a problem, I went right along with her. Felicity was quite a chatterbox in between putting out little fires around the store. She never complained, even when it was crystal clear that the customer was in the wrong. It quickly became clear why she was sweating so hard. I was tired from trying to keep up with her. Finally, at 4pm, Jason came and told me to I could go home. I was relieved even though I had to come back the next day to hopefully finish up the training videos. Jason was waiting at the door as I headed toward the exit through the crowded store. I was thinking he wanted to talk to me before I left, but apparently there was a policy that everyone’s bags had to be checked before leaving the store. He did flash me one of his million dollar smiles, which left a nice image in my head as I walked to my car. I had to remind myself that I wasn’t and shouldn’t be so mesmerized by his smile. I had to stop starting the next day.

I stopped by the grocery store to pick up a few things since I was tired of fast food, which was all Shanna, and Craig ate. I was relieved to get to the apartment and see that no one was there. I had assumed that Craig had his own place but he was at the apartment so much that it was hard to tell. Someone had cleaned up the apartment and there was a fan blowing on the newly scrubbed part of the carpet where alcohol had spilled. It was a big improvement from when I had left, but it still had a funky smell. I felt like the drinking was going to happen every weekend, if not more. Maybe it was just me being tired from working, but at that moment I felt like I didn’t want to be there. I knew I had to stick it out though. The only other option was to go home and I could only imagine the problems it would cause when questions arose as to why I left. As I put away the groceries that I bought, it dawned on me to check the messages to see if Eric called. Taking a seat on the couch I did just that. My heart jumped when I heard there was one new message only to be quickly deflated when I heard it was Daddy’s voice calling to check-in on us. I couldn’t believe that Eric just wasn’t going to call me anymore. Thinking about the situation made me so angry that I impulsively dialed his number to go off on him. He didn’t answer which made me glad instead of angrier. I didn’t need him to know that he had taken me out of my element.

I don’t even know how long I sat there with my eyes closed trying to calm down. I was tired, hungry, annoyed and letting my emotions get the best of me. My mind was telling me to just let the situation go with Eric and enjoy my summer, but there was a nagging feeling in my heart that I wasn’t trying hard enough. My heart was telling me that I should try and call him again. How many times though was I supposed to try? My heart won the battle and dialed his number once again, but once again there was no answer. I left a message telling him that I had things I wanted to tell him hoping that it would spark some interest and make him call back. All I could do at that point was wait. It seemed like I was always waiting on him to call back and I felt stupid that I had called and left another message. Did I seem desperate? That’s the last thing I wanted to do, but I just wanted him to know that I hadn’t just deserted him.

I only planned to sit there on the couch for a few minutes after trying to call Eric and then go and cook the stir-fry I had picked up from the grocery store. My tiredness overpowered me and the next thing I knew, I was jumping up out of my sleep from hearing the door opening. It was Craig walking in talking very loudly with Shanna right on his heels laughing at whatever he was saying.

“Oh well good morning.” Of course Craig couldn’t resist a smart comment.

I didn’t respond.

“Wow. Was it a rough first day on the job?” Shanna asked as she came in carrying a case of beer.

“Just a little tired.”

I was instantly annoyed with the both of them and didn’t feel like sitting around joking with them. I made my way to the kitchen glancing at the clock and was shocked to see that it was almost 8pm. I was famished by this point and only wanted to eat then go to bed. I had no interest in sitting around watching them make fools of themselves. Craig followed me into the kitchen to put the case of beer down. He obviously didn’t catch the hint that I didn’t want to be bothered.

“Hey Shanna, Cheryl is making us dinner. How kind of you!”

I knew anything I said at this point would be pretty nasty, so I just smiled and continued what I was doing.

“What?” Shanna replied as she made her way to the kitchen. “Well gosh, next time let us know so we don’t stop and eat first.”

They were both over my shoulder and I wanted to yell at both of them to back off. To make matters worse, Shanna’s breath reeked of beer and it was making my empty stomach turn. I could tell they were already on their way to being drunk because neither of them caught on to the fact that I just wanted to be left alone. I was starting to think they drank every night so that they could just walk around in a state of constant goofiness letting nothing bother them. At that point I wanted to join them just so I wouldn’t feel so blah, but I knew I could never actually bring myself to actually do it. Shanna and Craig finally went back to the living room and started a movie. I could hear them cackling and joking on each other as I sat at the kitchen table alone eating my dinner. It sucked eating by myself, but at the same time, I was glad they left me alone. I wasted no time cleaning up after I ate and as I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth I told myself not to even look at what they were up to. I felt a rush of relief when I was in my room and with the door closed and they had seemingly forgotten I was even there. I curled up in bed to watch an episode of Law and Order on TV feeling like such a loser for being in bed so early on a Saturday night. It definitely wasn’t what I expected of the summer.