Somewhere Only We Know (19 page)

Kate pulled her car to a stop outside Jack’s house.
They had just spent three hours in the emergency room having Finn’s nose checked out. She turned to a very battered looking Finn and gave him a sad smile, then sighed. She was sick with guilt that this had happened to him in her home.

“Don’t,” Finn said quickly.

“Don’t what?” Kate asked.

“Don’t blame yourself for this,” Finn said, as if reading her mind. “This was not your fault. Hell I don’t even blame Callum that much.
I probably would have reacted the same way as he did.”

“There was no excuse for behaving like he did,” Kate said
, looking down at her hands.

“Kate look at me,” Finn said
, as he reached over and took her hand. Kate turned and let her eyes meet his. “If you walked in on Callum with that girl?”

“I know,” Kate sighed. She knew he was right, if it had been her that walked in on him. She would have totally freaked out
. “Still, doesn’t mean I should be happy about your face. What is your dad going to say about your two black eyes?”

Don’t worry about my dad,” Finn said with a sad smile. “I am just happy it’s not broken.”

“Yes,” Kate nodded, “That is something, at least.”

“So you gonna come in and say hi?” Finn asked, hopefully.

“Sure,” Kate said and forced a smile. She was sure Jack was going to be pissed about Finn’s face. She thought at this point, Jack would wish that he had never invited her into his house that day. She had brought nothing but trouble with her.

“Stop,” Finn said
, as he opened the car door and climbed out. He hurried around the car to open Kate’s door. “You are worrying for nothing. I am a big boy. Dad isn’t going to blame you.”

He took hold of her hand and led her up the pathway to his father’s house.

“Dad, it’s just us,” he called out, as they stepped through the door. He got no response. He looked at Kate and she could tell he was worried.

“Maybe he is out
in the back garden,” she suggested.

“DAD!” Finn called out a little louder, as he made his way towards the back of the house. Still there was no answer. Kate could sense the worry oozing from Finn and if she was honest, she was worried too. “I told him not to be going out alone
, if something happened to him in the street, how would we know?”

“He can’t
have gone far,” Kate replied. “Maybe he has gone to my house. He dropped by there, yesterday.”

“Did he now?” Finn replied and gave Kate a strange look. She was just about to give him an explanation, when she looked over his shoulder and spotted Jack lying
face down, in the back yard.”

“Finn, call 911,” she told
him, as she rushed toward the back door. Finn turned and saw his father on the ground and hurried after her, as he pulled his phone from his pocket.

“Jack,” Kate said, dropping to her knees next to Jack. She pressed her fingers to his neck, looking for a pulse but could find none. She bent closer to him trying to hear breath sounds
, but there was none. “Finn tell them to hurry, he isn’t breathing.”

Finn called 911 and relayed everything Kate told him to say. She carefully turned Jack over and opened the collar
on his shirt. She tried again to find a pulse, but when she couldn’t, she began CPR.

“COME
ON JACK!” She shouted, as she pressed down on his chest again and again, stopping only to breathe into his mouth.

“DAD, PLEASE,” Finn said
, as he paced up and down next to Kate and Jack, panic and fear gripping him completely. They could hear the sound of sirens in the distance, but Kate didn’t give up, she pushed down on his chest again and again. Stopped to breathe into his mouth then she checked his pulse once again. This time she could feel a very faint pulse, so she kept going with the CPR.

Finally,
Jack let out a very faint breath.

“He is breathing,” Kate said looking up at Finn. “But only just, we need to get him to the hospital as soon as
possible.”

They heard banging on the front door and Finn ran to the front to let the paramedics in.

“So, what do we have here?” one on the paramedics asked, as they joined Kate on the ground next to Jack.

“Sixty-seven year old male, stage four cancer, found unconscious ten minutes ago. No pulse initially
, but after CPR, we got a pulse, it’s weak and thready. I think it’s a possible MI, but with his underlying health issues it’s hard to tell,” Kate replied, then glanced up at the paramedic, who was looking at her in surprise. “I’m a doctor.”

“Thanks Doc,” was all he replied
, as they began to work on Jack. Kate stood up and went to Finn, who was standing watching his father, white as a ghost.

“I thought he was
dead,” he whispered to Kate. “And all I could think was, the last time I spoke to my father, I was mad at him.”

“
Finn, he knew you were just upset,” Kate replied, as she looked back down at Jack who was now hooked up to an IV drip and had an oxygen mask on.

“I just don’t want the last memory I have of him, to be
of me being angry with him for not telling us he was sick,” Finn said and he looked down at Kate. She pulled him to her and hugged him tightly.

When they arrived at the hospital, Jack was brought straight into a
treatment room and Finn was told to wait outside.

“Are you coming with us
Doc?” The paramedic turned and asked Kate. She just froze.

“Go with them
,” Finn pleaded with Kate. “Please, I don’t want him on his own.”

Kate nodded and hurried after the paramedics and Jack.

“This is Dr. Greyson,” the paramedic introduced her to the doctor taking care of Jack. “She was on the scene when we arrived. She had resuscitated Mr. Morgan at the scene. She said he has stage four cancer.”

“Dr
. Greyson,” the middle aged doctor turned his attention to Kate. “I am Dr. Carmichael…”

“Please, call me Kate,” Kate corrected him, she hate
d being called doctor now.

“Kate,” he repeated. “
So Mr. Morgan was diagnosed with stage four cancer.”

“Yes,” Kate confirmed. “About three weeks ago.”

Kate filled the doctor in on everything she knew about Jack’s condition. She was still talking to the doctor when Jack’s eyes flicked open.

“Hey,” Kate said
, as she moved closer to Jack and smiled down at him. “You gave us all quite a scare.”

“I’m still here then?” he said with a grin, from behind his oxygen mask.

“You think we were gonna let you go that easy?” Kate laughed. “Finn is outside. I will go and let him know how you are doing. I know he is worried sick about you.”

Jack grabbed Kate’s arm and pulled her closer to him.

“Thanks for being here with him,” Jack whispered. “I know it’s not easy for you to be here, but right now he needs a friend.”

“He has one, Jack,” she said with a big smile. Then she kissed him o
n the cheek and excused herself to go look for Finn.

“How is he?” Finn was up on his feet the minute he saw Kate.

“He is awake and talking,” Kate told a relieved looking Finn. “He is worried about you.”

“Silly old man,” Finn said
, as he broke down and began to cry. Kate instinctively wrapped her arms around Finn and held him close. “I really thought we lost him.”

“Finn!
” Sara called, as she burst through the emergency room doors and spotted Finn and Kate. When she saw Finn cry, she began to cry, as panic took hold of her. “Oh God, is he…”

“No,” Kate reassured her
, as she released Finn. He turned to face his sister and her face dropped.

“What the hell happened to you?” Sara asked when she saw
her brother bruised and battered face.

“It was nothing,” Finn replied quickly, flashing a glance at Kate. “I don’t think it matter
s now anyways.”

“Why? What’s wrong?” Sara asked.

Finn told a devastated Sara about their father’s condition. Kate sat and watched Sara fell apart before her and her heart broke.

She thought back to the day Callum told her that Emily was dead. She could remember it as if it where the day before and the pain in her chest was a
s strong as it was that day. She was just about to make an excuse to leave when the doctor she had been talking to earlier, came looking for them.

“Is this Mr
. Morgan’s family?” he asked looking directly at Kate.

“This is his son
Finn and daughter Sara,” she replied. She knew by his face, the news was grim. So did Finn. He reached down and took hold of Kate’s hand, gripping it tightly.

“It would seem your father has had a heart attack,” he began, and Kate knew he was tryi
ng to pick his words carefully. “We have run some test and it appears that there is a blockage in one of the valves in his heart. Under normal circumstances, we would take him straight to surgery.”

“Is
that what you are going to do now?” Sara asked, hopefully.

“
Ms. Morgan,” Dr. Carmichael said, stepping closer to Sara and Finn. “As you are aware, your father has stage four cancer, we have read your father’s charts and it is a very aggressive form. It is very extensive. Your father’s cancer is in the end stages. He is weak, very weak. If we were to open him up, the chances of him making through the operation are very low.”

“So, what does that mean?” Finn asked.

“Mr. Morgan,” Dr. Carmichael said and paused to take a deep breath before he continued. “The operation isn’t an option, but without it, your father will more than likely have another heart attack and it will be a fatal one.”

“So you are telling me, my dad is dying?” Finn said, but then corrected himself. “I mean, I know he is dying, but he is dying right now.”

“I think you should spend as much time with your father,” the doctor replied. “While you still have the time.”

“How long?” Finn asked, but not wanting to hear the answer.

“Not long, a few days at the most,” the doctor replied. “I am sorry it isn’t better news. Now I need to go back to your father, we will be moving him into a room in a few minutes. You can see him then.”

The doctor excused himself and left the
m alone. Sara, who had remained silent the whole time, suddenly let out a heart breaking sob. She dropped to the seat in the waiting room, buried her face in her hands and cried like her world had been blown apart.

Finn sat down next to his sister, wrapped her in his arms and held her close. He looked up at Kate and her heart almost broke.

“Kate,” he said, as tears danced in his eyes. “My dad is dying.”

By the time Kate go
t home that evening, she was emotionally and physically exhausted. She slipped her key into the lock and prepared herself for the grilling she was going to get from her two best friends.

She had called them from the hospital
earlier to let them know what had happened to Jack. Olly had asked Kate if she had talked to Callum that day. When Kate said she hadn’t, Olly sighed but said nothing.

Kate kne
w, however, once she walked through the door, Olly would want to discuss, in great detail, what exactly had gone on that morning, and everything else that had happened since she left the house with Finn.

“Y
ou’re home,” Leah said brightly from the sofa where she was having a picnic of popcorn and cheesy puffs, watching TV. “How is Finn’s dad?”

“Jack,” Kate replied. “His name is Jack, and he is no
t doing so well. Where is Olly?”

“She is in the bath,” Leah replied and gave Kate a s
mile. “How are you doing, sweetie.”

Kate didn’t reply, instead she just walked over and slumped down on the sofa next to Leah.

“That bad, huh?” Leah said, reaching for Kate’s hand.

“Jack is dying,” Kate said sadly. “It was heart breaking to sit and watch Finn and his sister try
to put on a brave face in front of their Dad. They have him sedated, so he slept mostly, but Finn and Sara never left his side.”

“
Oh Kate,” Leah replied. “I am so sorry. I know Jack means a lot to you.”

“I stay
ed there as long as I could,” Kate continued. “But it’s a time for family and I am not family.”

“I am sure Finn was grateful for the support though,” Leah said with a smile.

“How did I end up here, Leah?” Kate asked as she looked over at her friend. “I wish I could go asleep and when I wake up, discover all this was just a bad dream.”

“
I wish you could too Kate,” Leah said, giving her friend’s hand a soft squeeze. “I wish I had a magic wand that could make everything better for you.”

“Is Olly pissed at me?” Ka
te asked, already guessing the answer.

“She just wants
what is best for you,” Leah replied.

“And she thinks that’s Callum,” Kate sighed.

“Yes, I do,” Olly said from behind them, making both girl’s turn in unison. “But only because I want you to be happy.”

She walked around the sofa and sat down next to her friend.

“Olly, I love Callum, I really do,” Kate told her friend honestly. “But he can’t come barging into my life after hurting me and behave how he did. Finn didn’t deserve the way Callum hit him today.”

“He was upset
and acted without thinking,” Olly said, feeling the need to speak up for Callum. “But Kate, he is hurting too. Oh, he knows he acted like an idiot but Kate he is so scared he is losing you. He loves you.”

“I know he does,” Kate sighed and flopped back on the chair. She closed her eyes and pictured Callum. She wished for just five minutes the
y could just stop pulling each other apart. “Believe me, love was never the issue.”

“Then what is
the issue?” Olly asked. “Because I don’t get it. You love each other and want to be together. What is the problem?”

“Olly,” Kate said turning to her friend. “Why does this matter so much to you?”

“Because you are one of my best friends,” Olly replied looking at Kate in frustration. “I have known you all my life. You have always looked out for me and Leah. No matter who broke our hearts or drove us nuts, we always knew, you were there for us. I love you and Callum so much, you are my family. I can’t sit here and watch you two pull each other apart. Not when I know you both still love each other.”

“
I will give him a call,” Kate said, as she reached over and took Olly’s hand. ”Maybe we can talk, try sort the mess out, for once and for all.”

“He…eh…” Olly said knowing Kate would not be happy with what she had to tell her. “He said he was going back to New York.
He was leaving today. Kate, he’s gone.”

“Oh,” was all Kate could say without bursting into tears.
She stared at the fire place as a million thoughts filled her mind. Her head ached and she felt so tired.

“Kate, why don’t you just call him,”
Leah said, sensing her friend’s inner struggle. “You know he would be back here in a heartbeat. He loves you so much. It doesn’t have to be like this.”

“I am not so sure
, Leah,” Kate replied sadly. “He wouldn’t even give me a chance to explain this morning. I don’t know, maybe too much has happened for us to fix it. We lost Emily, we hurt each other. Maybe it’s not meant to be fixed.”

“Is that was you really believe?” Olly asked.

“Maybe. Olly, I want to make things right with Callum,” Kate replied honestly. “But my heart really can’t take much more.”

Neither of her friend
s replied. There was nothing left to say. Kate felt drained. She didn’t have any fight left. Slowly she stood up and lifted her handbag from where she had left it on the coffee table.

“I am going to call it a night,”
she said as she bent down and kissed both her friends on the forehead. “I told Finn I would go back to the hospital in the morning, so if I am gone when you wake up, that’s where I shall be.”

“Okay,” Leah said giving her a big smile.

“Goodnight,” Kate said and headed towards her room.

“Good night Kate.” Olly called after her.

When she was in the privacy of her own room, she flopped back down onto the bed and let out a deep sigh. Her head was so full of a million thoughts, it was hurting her. She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, as she tried to alleviate the tension headache she’d had all day.

As
she lay there, Callum’s face came crashing into her thoughts. She could see him standing there at her door that morning, rage and anger pouring from his eyes.

She had only ever seen him like that once before, and that was
two nights before their wedding.

They had been for dinner with Kate’s dad, her brother’s
Shea and Dara. James, Leah, Olly, and of course Callum’s parents.

Kate had met them once before, when she and Callum went to visit a few after they got engaged. Kate knew then
Evelyn Greyson did not approve of her son’s choices. So Kate was not looking forward to spending more time with her, soon-to-be mother-in-law.

The night had gone well despite the miserable face of E
velyn sitting at one end of the table. Kate even found she managed to relax a little.

The night was almost over, when E
velyn slipped on to the chair next to Kate.

“So you are still planning on marrying my son in two days?”
Evelyn said in a hushed voice, all the while keeping a big, fake grin on her spiteful face.

“Yes,” Kate replied, a little taken back by the woman’s clear hostility. “That’s exactly what I plan.”

“And you think someone like you can make him happy, do you?” she said with a half laugh.

“Yes, I do,” Kate replied as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She glanced over at Callum who was deep in conversation with James and her father. “I love him.”

“Oh I am sure you think you do,” Evelyn retorted looking Kate directly in the eye. “But it won’t last.”

“Excuse me?” Kate said in complete disbelief.

“Darling girl,” Evelyn purred. “This isn’t the first time Callum thought he was in love. Of course, Brittney was more his type, you know more our social equal.  Then a month before the wedding, Callum called the whole thing off, and before we knew it, he was on a plane to Ireland.  You my dear, I am sorry to say, are nothing more than a rebound thing. He will see sense and come back home, where he belongs.”

Kate was floored, she looked back over at Callum, who
had just happened to glance over at her at that exact moment. He smiled as their eyes met. She returned his smile but inside she was crushed. She knew Evelyn was just being spiteful, but she was hurt none the less.

Callum was almost married to someone else.
What if she really was just a rebound thing? She tried to listen to what Evelyn was saying, but her heart was pounding so hard, she couldn’t focus on a word she was now saying.

“If you would excuse me,” Kate said as she stood up quickly from her chair
and grabbed her bag from the table. “I need to use the ladies room.”

She hurried towards the
bathroom, but when she saw the exit. She took a detour. She bumped into her brother Shea, and Callum’s dad, Callum Senior, who had been outside to have a cigarette.

“Kats,” Shea
said when he saw his sister. “You heading already?”

“Eh… yeah
,” she replied. “I am feeling exhausted.”

“Is Callum leaving too?” Callum Senior asked. Even though Evelyn was a nasty piece of work, Kate did like Callum Senior.

“He is just chatting to my Dad,” she told him. “He is going to follow me out. She kissed them both goodnight, and continued on outside. She waved down a passing taxi and quickly climbed inside.

She was only in their apartment five minutes when she heard the door slam.

“KATE!” Callum’s voice echoed through the apartment. Kate, who had been pacing up and down, froze and waited for Callum to find her. “KATE!”

He walked down the hallway and found Kate standing in the living room,
waiting for him.

“Here you are,” he said, the look of sheer relief on his face
, very obvious. “When Dad said you had left, I didn’t know what the hell to think. Why did you leave without telling anyone?”

“I just needed a little space.” Kate said, unable to look at him directly in the eye.

“Katie, what is it?” He asked moving closer to her, sensing something wasn’t quite right. “Has something happened?”

“Who is Brittney?” Kate asked
, getting straight to the point as she finally let her eyes meet his.

“No one that matters,” Callum said, he tried to sound calm but the panic in his voice was very apparent
.

“You were going to marry her,” Kate shot back, her voiced quivered and she swallowed hard, trying to stop herself from crying.

“And it would have been the biggest mistake of my life,” Callum replied.  “Kate why does it even matter, we are getting married in two days. Brittney was my past. You are my future.”

“I can’t believe you kept this from me Cal,” Kate said angrily. She was hurt he would have any secrets from her. “I thought we were closer than that.”

“We are,” Callum insisted. “But she is a part of my life I want to forget.”

“You should have told me,” Kate replied turning away from him,
blinking back the hot, salty tears that were stinging her eyes. “What if this is just a rebound thing?”

“
This is all my mother,” Callum said and the anger seeped from every part of his body. “I am going to kill that woman.”

“But what if she is right?” Kate cried. “Callum, you walked out on that marriage and you meet me
five minutes later. I don’t want you to wake up one morning and regret marrying me.”

“Kat
ie, that is never going to happen,” Callum said, with a half laugh, pulling Kate into his arms. “I am sorry I never told you about Brittney, but the truth was, she meant nothing to me. I knew marrying her would have been a big mistake. She was everything I didn’t want in the person I would spend the rest of my life with. She was not you.”

Kate looked at him for a moment and consider his answer. Finally
, she gave him small smile.

“Okay,” Kate replied finally.
“No more secrets.”

“No more secrets,” Callum nodded and gave her a big smile. He pressed his lips to hers softly then rested his forehead against Kate’s. “I need to go out, I won’t be long.”

“Where are you going?” Kate asked as she glanced over at the clock on the wall. “It almost midnight.”

“I think it
’s time Mother and I had a little chat,” he replied and Kate knew he was mad, really, really mad. She wanted to ask him not to go, but she knew he needed to do this. He kissed her once again. Then he was gone.

Kate lay on her bed and stared at the ceiling. She wondered if Evelyn knew she had left him. Kate knew Evelyn would be positively gloating if she knew and that really pissed her off.

She closed her eyes and tried to clear her muddled thoughts. She needed to sort things with Callum, or let him go for good. Either way, she knew they couldn’t keep going the way they were. She could feel the tiredness take hold of her. Finally, she drifted off to sleep, her head full of Callum and what she needed to do.