Starlaw (13 page)

“Would you? Would any of us?”

“So we're damned for showing compassion? Should I have just blurted the fact that I burned all her friends' bodies so that not even ash remained? Would that make her feel better?” Darius sarcastically finished.

“As I've already stated, she just wants the truth. All of it. With some people, nothing less will do.”

Darius paced slowly before turning to his friend again. “Barst, she'll never believe anything anyone tells her? There'll always be doubts.”

“But patronizing doesn't diminish doubt, it only causes mistrust. And it's time we quit withholding things. She's been trying very hard to act as though she can deal with this situation but it's not remotely possible when someone has been virtually abducted, told her friends are all dead, and that she's now stuck in a reality that seems more like a nightmare. Right now, the facts are her ally.”

“So you're saying my initial orders not to speak to her about what happened on Earth … prompted, I might add, by her show of rage in the sick bay … was faulty. Is that it?”

“Sir … I don't know how we could have more appropriately approached the subject. I just know this woman isn't as backward as you seem to think. Gemma agrees that all questions should be answered, and that Laurel should be allowed full access to the ship's computers and any training she needs. This might help her adapt where nothing else has so far.” He shrugged. “If nothing else, studying our history and our part of life in the galaxy will keep her occupied.”

Darius sighed heavily and finally nodded. “I suppose so. But … and I can't put too fine a point on this … as sad as her loss is, this is a working enforcer ship. I cannot and will not spend time bending over backward to assuage her tragic life's course or explain circumstances as if she's a child. No one is sorrier for her losses than I. Indeed, all of us grieve for her and those who were murdered. But others have suffered at Goll's hands. She hasn't got the market cornered on sorrow. I won't have this ship and its crew turned into a mental nursery for one lone Earther who refuses to accept the situation. If she wants to funnel her energies into other, more positive pursuits, then she is free to do so. But we are not the enemy here! I stand by my initial orders that if she cannot or will not control her behavior, or her decorum concerning hierarchy aboard this vessel, I'll have her locked away until we land on Luster. If, at that time, she's still unable or unwilling to come to terms I'll have her transferred to a mental facility whose physicians can more suitably deal with her issues. Is that clear?”

“Understood, sir. But … ”

“Yes?”

“I trust you'll let Gemma and me explain this in terms more … ”

“More
what
?” Darius demanded as he put his hands on his hips.

“I was about to use the words …
more
tactful
,” Barst explained.

“Tell her however you will! I shouldn't have coddled the infant to begin with. In my mistaken belief that she might not be ready for the facts, I withheld them. She obviously mistook my brand of
tact
… tact only used in deference to her position as a law enforcer … for some sort of sinister subterfuge. So let her deal with the truth, harsh and blunt as it may be. Tell her whatever it is she wants to know.” He drew himself up to his full height. “Whatever she thinks or feels is not my concern any longer. I want no more outbursts of temper on this ship. My sad, infantile displays inclusive!” He pointed toward the hatch to signal the end of the conversation. “Keep her out of my way and busy. Is that understood?”

“Aye,” Barst uttered as he turned and left the space.

• • •

“And this control panel handles the environmental status of your quarters,” Gemma said as she finished explaining how to operate life support systems within Laurel's new quarters.

“Are you sure His Highness won't go thermonuclear when he hears you've assigned me quarters?” Laurel quietly asked. “I thought he'd lock me up for sure after that little misunderstanding we had.”

“You've done nothing but express your opinion. Since you're not a member of the crew the commander can hardly hold you in contempt for that. As long as you don't do it where others can hear or cast disparagement in a way that disrupts the normal operation of the ship, that is.” Gemma shrugged. “You can't go on living in the med bay. Since we have space available, it just makes sense that you have a place of your own. My quarters are just down the passageway, if you need anything, or have any questions concerning access to the main computer bank.”

Laurel took a deep breath, exhaled slowly, and looked around her new quarters. The bulkhead, deck, and overhead were made of shiny, silver metal, just like the rest of the ship's interior. Thankfully, crewmembers had their own bathing facilities. She meant to make use of hers soon if she could remember how to turn on the damned water.

Against the far bulkhead, a single-sized bed was neatly made. She even had a small view port to gaze out at the stars, enhanced as they were for viewing pleasure according to Gemma's description.

She walked toward the round port, stared at the coldness of space, and simply stood there, mute. What was left to say? Whatever protest she might have made would fall on deaf ears and likely get her into even more trouble. It was clear the commander of this ship was no fan of hers. For her part, she spent far too much time thinking about what
he
thought. And she didn't know why, except to explain it as his being in charge of everything that'd gone wrong in her life. Still, he had saved her. But what difference would that make if she couldn't acclimate?

“Laurel, we never asked because we thought it might be too traumatic but … ”

“Go on. Ask whatever you want,” Laurel prompted as she turned to face Gemma again.

“Did you leave any family behind?”

She slowly shook her head and stuffed down a smartass remark concerning the tardiness of the query. There was no sense arguing over any of that now.

“No. No husband or kids, thank God. I do have parents who won't be overly concerned after they get used to the idea that I'm gone. That shouldn't take so very long.”

“I'm sure that's not true. I'm certain they'll miss you terribly!” Gemma insisted as she moved forward and put her hands on Laurel's shoulders.

“No. Not so much. They went their separate ways a long time ago. And after too many arguments about how much they paid for my very exclusive education only to find I'd underachieved by deciding to be a cop … well … we didn't have a lot to say to one another.”

“What
did
make you choose an enforcer's life … if you don't mind my asking?”

The corner of Laurel's mouth lifted as she shrugged. “I'd always secretly wanted to. When I was a kid I watched every show I could that had to do with cops, detectives, and solving crimes. My parents always had different plans so I never told them what I wanted to do with my life until after I'd signed up for the police academy.”

“Well … I'm sure you're a very good enforcer. Especially after what I saw in the tavern. You aren't afraid to stand up for yourself, that's for certain.”

“Yeah. That's me,” she muttered sarcastically, “I'm all up for a fight.” Then she shook her head and snorted in disdain.

“What's wrong?”

“It's a damned shame. Ironic really.”

“What is?” Gemma asked.

“Out of all of us in the park, I'm the only one who had nobody to go home to. But I'm the only one to survive. Whoever made that decision really humped the bunk.”

Gemma briefly bowed her head.

“My partner was a couple of weeks away from getting married … ” Laurel began, but then let her words trail away. Nothing was going to alter what happened. Talking about it wasn't going to do her any good.

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

Laurel noted the sincerity in Gemma's voice. There was only one thing she wanted. “Yeah. Put my organs back where they belong and take me home.”

“I wish that were possible. You'd probably end up in a stasis cell for the rest of our journey, just so we could keep you alive until we got back to Earth.”

“And the second part? There is one, isn't there?”

“Actually getting back to Earth again isn't within my power to grant. Nor the commander's. But he'd have still asked on your behalf. That much is true.”

“So it's pretty much etched in stone, then?”

“Laurel … how could you explain what'd happened were such a request to ever be granted? Assuming miracles in this regard were possible, you know your life would be highly scrutinized. Authorities on Earth would never believe your story concerning our existence. They might even institutionalize you for mentioning the incident. You couldn't tell the truth, and you'd most surely be caught in any lie. What's more to the point, a lot of time has passed since you left your world. Far more than you can account for. And the faster this ship goes, the worse that situation gets. People you left behind are aging as we speak. Laws of the universe can't be changed in that regard.”

“Even if that
wasn't
the case, it's like you said. They'd probably lock me up and throw the key away. Everything that's happened to me sounds like a very bad movie.” She sighed heavily, lifted her hands, and let them fall to her sides again. “So here we are.”

Gemma simply nodded.

Laurel kept her silence for a time, moving about the quarters opening and closing containment units meant for uniforms or other clothing and belongings she obviously didn't have. Eventually, she moved closer to Gemma and pretended to rally. Sadly, her poor acting skills to this point hadn't fooled anyone. Gemma and Barst had known she was scared and had been trying hard not to show it. Still, there was no sense screaming, crying, or venting. Not until she was alone. There was nothing anyone in this strange, futuristic existence could do for her. And if she pushed
Commander
Inflexible
too far—if she showed any outward appearance of how unraveled she really felt—he might follow through on his promise to lock her up for good.

“Are you sure there won't be any trouble with me accessing the ship's library? If I've gotta be here, I need to catch up on about three hundred years of technology. Otherwise, you and Barst will end up babysitting me for the rest of my life.”

“There'll be no problem. I assure you the computer system is intuitive. It will suggest searches and techniques as it analyzes your needs and skill level,” Gemma promised. “But if you have any questions you want personally answered, you must come to Barst and me. Of course, we'll take meals together in the galley.” She paused for a moment before offering a friendly smile. “It won't be long before you start to see how things work. I'm sure you'll catch on, Laurel. The technology may be advanced but it's just a matter of learning to access data and use it to your advantage. You'll have all the time you need.”

“Speaking of which … how long will this trip take to … where was it again?”

“I'll take months to get home, give or take, depending on new worm hole mapping and requests for law enforcement assistance along the way. You can start by searching through the database concerning our home planet of Luster. It's where the commander was born and raised. Barst and I had families that immigrated there some decades ago. We're considered citizens now. I'm sure the same privileges will be offered to you.”

Laurel lifted one brow in disdain. “And how is the commander going to explain my presence? I'm sure my being here isn't considered normal since my world is off limits.”

“The commander, Barst, and I will offer testimony as to your injuries. We're certain special dispensation will be made. No one would have wanted you to lie there in the dirt and die.”

She considered that piece of information wryly. There were moments when she wondered if that scenario wouldn't have been better. But the survivor in her wouldn't consider anything as depressive as suicide. She was alive and meant to stay that way, if for no other reason than to inflict the high-and-mighty commander of this ship with her continued existence. She'd live for those who hadn't had another night of life after Goll. That thought brought up another query.

“And I
will
get to say something at Goll's trial?” Laurel slowly asked.

“Almost certainly! You can give better testimony than anyone so far. You have firsthand experience of his cruelty.”

“Yeah. I certainly won't ever forget it,” she muttered as she turned away, trying to control anger Gemma didn't need to see.

“I suppose I should get back to my duties now. Later, we'll have the ship's quartermaster issue you clothing. I'm sorry that enforcer uniforms are all he has. But you can take the emblems off, as we did with the clothing you now wear.”

Laurel glanced down at the tall boots, skintight leggings, and unmarked black tunic she wore. “What I wear really isn't important.”

After a long moment of standing there, it was clear Gemma wanted to be away. And
she
had centuries of learning to start if she wasn't going to be consigned to some schoolroom for the rest of her life. And then there was her idea to find Goll, wherever he was on this ship, and make sure the punishment he had coming was accomplished. There was no way she'd trust justice to beings who considered her world so inferior. Some bleeding heart might just find a way to let that butchering son-of-a-bitch go. And if that happened, he'd head back to where pickings were easy and more people would suffer as she had. For her idea to work, she needed the computer and some time alone. Up to now, no one had asked what she'd been researching. She prayed no one would and that whatever she studied wouldn't be worth such
superior
intellects' time. Still, she'd be as careful as she could.