Stricken Resolve (33 page)

What’s going on in that beautiful mind,

I’m on your magical mystery ride.

And I’m so dizzy,

don’t know what hit me,

but I’ll be alright. My heads under
water.

But I’m breathing fine.

You’re crazy and I’m out of my mind.

Cause all of me,

loves all of you,

love your curves and all your edges...”,
sings.

“Oh my god. This is our song, the song you
played on the radio the first night you came home,” I excitedly
state, floating effortlessly around the dance floor, as my
fantastic dance partner guides me.

“Yes, sweetheart, this is your surprise.”
Tilting his head down, he captures my lips, softly kissing me, our
bodies magnetically drawn to one another.

“My love, do you like it?” he asks, pulling
away so slowly, that my heart wants to reach out and drag his
supple lips back down to mine.

“You’re my prize, anything more is just a
bonus,” I smirk and quickly peck him on the lips.

Dancing around the room, the photographer
goes wild and shoots us from every angle. But all I can do is pay
attention to my husband, looking in his eyes, inhaling his
delectable scent, enjoying our first dance as husband and wife. As
soon as the song ends, the DJ announces it’s time to cut the cake.
Apparently tonight is full of nontraditional surprises. Not that
our lives are any sort of normal on a regular basis.

Walking, hand-in-hand, Papa Bear and I make
it over to cake and cut a small slice of cake to share. Picking up
a tiny piece, I place it gently in his mouth and he does the same
in return. Stacy would kill us if we messed up my makeup any more
than I already have. Taking bigger slices with us to our seats,
champagne is handed out and it’s time for the toasts. I think I’ll
go first.

Clinking my glass, I stand, one hand holding
my champagne and my other resting on James’s shoulder; he’s turned
so he can watch me. I’m a little nervous to be center of attention,
but here goes nothing.

“Thank you all for coming tonight, it’s been
an amazing wedding. I couldn’t image it being any better. Thank you
Stacy for throwing it together at last minute, you’re my hero.” He
smiles and blows me a kiss.

“I know our lives have been a rollercoaster
for the past year, between having the babies and James leaving for
a short time. But I am thankful every day to have each and every
one of you people in my life. Love you all.” I salute the glass and
they all clink.

Next in line goes James and my dad, who both
give superb short but sweet speeches.

Now it’s time for Stacy. Oh boy, this should
be good.

“Well, hello every one, I’m Stacy as you all
know, I’m also Emily’s best friend and have been for the past ten
years. We met in high school and well, it’s been friendship since
first collision. I want to say Emily, I am so happy to call you my
best friend. I seriously know I couldn’t breathe without you in my
life.”

“You got that right,” Kyle chimes in,
laughing.

“Yes, Kyle. We know I’m a little
co-dependent. Anyhow, I am very happy to be by your side when you
married the man that you belong with. I wouldn’t approve of just
any man marrying my sassy best friend. But James and you complete
one another and anyone who sees you two knows there is an eternity
of love that radiates from both of you. Congrats, baby girl.”

Awe! I love Stacy.

Standing up, I give him a long, warm hug and
thank him.

“My turn,” Johnathan announces, standing at
the sliding doors of the back of the house, a bottle of beer in his
hand. Since the ceremony ended, he hasn’t been out here very long.
Just long enough to eat and then he retired into the house. I think
to put Jenna to sleep and whatever else. I know it’s not to sleep
with Cammy, because she’s been here with Dylan all night long and
having a lot of fun chatting with the group. She’s a hoot.

Cammy stands, like she’s about to try and
deter him from what might happen. Johnathan is a loose cannon and
you can never be too sure what he might say or do.

“Sit,” Johnathan orders her and she complies
immediately. Sub obeying Dom, no questions asked.

“I’m not going to say anything wrong,” he
slurs.

Fuck! He’s drunk! This isn’t good.

Walking over to the stage, he snatches away
the microphone from the DJ booth and takes the platform front and
center.

Shhhiiitttt.

“Fist…Fuck…I mean first… of all.” Holding up
his finger to a number one he continues. “I love Emily, all you’s
know this. It’s not like I’m up-ah here spouting some nonsense.
It’s known. Johnathan the fuck up, loves two women. Yadda, fuckin’
yadda. Anywho’s, I’d be lyin’ if I said I’m not a little
heartbroken, by this happy nuptial thingy. But, even though I
personally am sad, for myself. I am very happy for Emily and James.
I might be a dick, I might fuck a lot of shit up and do a lot of
rude things. I’m a recovering selfish asshole. But…I know James is
right for her. I am the bad boy, I’m the misogynist, who could
never deserve her. She deserves someone like him, who doesn’t hurt
her, who fights to come back to her, who doesn’t cheat and who is
an all-around decent man. They love each other, and there ain’t
nothin’ more beautiful than love. Now, I know this song is going to
be completely out of place here at the wedding, but I didn’t think
me singing you a love song would sound appropriate. And since I am
a badass rocker with a killer voice, the boys and I decided it was
important to play a little something for ya. To commemorate you
never bein’ mine and forever married to that dude.” He points to
James and I chuckle, patting my husband’s leg. Wrapping his arm
around my shoulder, we sit back and watch the men set up on the
stage.

Leave it to Johnathan to make this a night
even harder to ever forget. God, love him.

“This song, I kind of stole from a band I’m
friends with. But it’s perfect for tonight.”

Great…. I can’t wait to hear what it is he
sings.

“I think you can do much better than me

After all the lies that I made you
believe

Guilt kicks in and I start to see

The edge of the bed

Where your nightgown used to be

I told myself I won't miss you

But I remember

What it feels like beside you

I really miss your hair in my face

And the way your innocence tastes

And I think you should know this

You deserve much better than me…..

While looking through your old box of
notes

I found those pictures I took

That you were looking for

If there's one memory I don't want to
lose

That time at the mall

You and me in the dressing room

I told myself I won't miss you

But I remember

What it feels like beside you

I really miss your hair in my face

And the way your innocence tastes

And I think you should know this

You deserve much better than me….,”

Awe, what a great song! He’s right; it
doesn’t sound right at our wedding, but it does fit our lives
perfectly, all the way down to the dressing room. Plus, he has an
amazing voice and he’s decided to sing at our wedding. How sweet is
that? He could sing row-row-row your boat and that would have meant
just as much.

After he finishes the song, I get up and hug
him, and the DJ takes back over. I get to dance with my dad,
Deacon, Stacy, James a lot more and Johnathan once. What a great
wedding. Eric and Jenna woke up long enough to dance with Mama and
Papa for a dance each. We switched them back and forth between us.
It felt great dancing with my infants on my wedding day.

As the night winds down, I grab Dylan just
before he heads to bed and dance with him.

“Does this mean you are still my Mama and
Papa Bears?” he asks, looking up at me.

“We will always be here Dylan, never going to
leave you. Papa will always be here too. Don’t worry.”

That answer makes him light up brighter than
the fourth of July. “Good, cause I like Papa Bear better than
Johnathan. He plays with me and we eat ice cream when nobody else
knows. Shhh, Mama, please don’t tell.”

Awe! Be still my heart. I love my little
man.

“You’re secret is safe with me.” I kiss him
on the cheek and walk him back over to Cammy, who’s standing on the
edge of the dance floor.

“I had fun with Mama Bear,” he tells her.

“I’m glad sweetie; now it’s time for
bed.”

Grabbing his hand into hers, she escorts him
from the party and he waves to me on his way into the house.
They’ve moved fully into the main part of the house, Dylan has a
bedroom upstairs and Cammy is now sleeping next to Johnathan.

“Ready to retire for the evening, my wife?”
James wraps his arms around my waist from behind, kissing me on the
neck.

“Yes, after this song.” I sway with him, my
hands holding his tightly around me.

What an amazing wedding it has been. I’ve
gotten to dance and speak with friends. I’m officially married to
my soul mate. I can’t think of much better of a day. Except maybe
the day the twins were born. Here’s to an eternity with the most
perfect man.

Chapter Twenty

~Emily~

The Honeymoon

“What are you doing, husband?” I yell loud
enough he can hear me outside, as I lay naked, wrapped in a warm
Sherpa blanket sprawled out in our king sized log cabin bed that
sits in our quaint honeymoon cabin retreat, secluded deep into the
redwoods of southern Oregon. A place near and dear to my sweet
husband’s heart.

“I’m slicing some fire roasted peaches to go
into this morning’s oatmeal, that I have cooking over the campfire.
Along with some freshly brewed coffee, just for you, my love.”

Awe, how more perfect can he be? Oatmeal with
roasted peaches and coffee. He sure does know how to make a girl
want to do nothing but jump his bones at first morning light. If a
man taking care of me is wrong, I sure as hell don’t wanna be
right. This is the life.

We’ve been camping out here for the past
three days and we have another eight to go. Rustic living at its
finest, in a small one bedroom luxury cabin with a wraparound front
porch, hot tub, small state of the art kitchen, a large bathroom
with separate tub and shower. The entire place screams frontier
land in the most exquisite sense of the word. It’s mostly modern
replicas of the old ways with some actual antique touches. The best
about this entire stay is the tranquility and oneness with nature.
If you step out front of the cabin, you walk onto a grassy patch of
land and ten paces out you come toe-to-toe with a sandy beach
surrounding the small lake that we now own. As a wedding present to
me, my Papa Bear bought his Mama Bear a cabin retreat deep in the
heart of the redwoods, fifteen miles from the nearest paved road.
We drove up the day after our wedding and left the babies with my
mom, dad, Johnathan, Cammy, Stacy and Kyle. I’m fairly certain they
can handle two babies between the six of them. Especially my
beautiful mom—considering she works in a pediatrician’s office as a
nurse.

The drive itself only took us about eleven
hours and we took highway five straight up the coast from Malibu.
We didn’t get in until late so I wasn’t able to truly appreciate
the beauty of these slender yet massive tress, that all stand
taller than the United State Capitol building. Hitting right around
two hundred and fifty, to three hundred feet tall, and maxing at
about three twenty five. I read about it in a book last night that
was stacked on our small living rooms rustic coffee table. While
James rubbed my feet and finished another one of his Dan Brown
novels. I think he’s trying to best me.

Last year I read around a hundred and thirty
books; it would have been more but I was working for Stricken full
time. Now, I do some work behind the scenes but it’s definitely
slowed down for me. They don’t need me as much anymore and being
the mother of Johnathan’s twins prevents me from leaving what I
like to call The Compound. Which is just a fancy name for the beach
house. Anyhow, like I was saying, James is trying to one up me in
the reading department, by forcing himself to read all the major
novels that I’ve already indulged in and finding new series to
invest his spare time reading. For instance; I was snooping through
his wedding present last night; I bought him a kindle. And I found
twelve John Grisham books and Jane Eyre. What man reads Jane Eyre?
Only a man who wants to compete with his wife. I’m awaiting the day
when I find the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy or The Masters of the
Shadow lands series on his kindle. Then I will officially know he’s
lost his marbles and has taken this friendly competition too far.
I’m looking forward to besting him this year and reading books I
know he wouldn’t or shouldn’t dare touch. Most of those novels are
sensually touching the romance department. If ya catch my
drift.

“Is my wife coming to see her husband? Or am
I going to have to drag you from our bedroom?”

Fine, I guess I’ll roll out of bed at….I peer
over at the clock…. Nine in the morning. Ewwww, that is just way
too early. I want to sleep in. Isn’t that part of the honeymoon
rule? Sleep in and relax. Seems rather simple to me.

“I’m coming,” I respond and literally roll
out of bed and glancing down at my chest, my milk is already
starting to seep this morning. Being a cow has its perks, like a
man who can’t get enough of your milk. But it makes a mess all the
time and I produce enough milk to feed eight babies. My doctor
called it overactive letdown reflex, but she said in my case it
isn’t harming the babies because I have a healthy balance of both
foremilk and hindmilk, whatever those are. So, now I’ve resorted to
pumping and donating my supply to a milk bank, it’s for women who
either can’t or choose not to breast feed and want to provide
proper nutrients to their babies. Which I find reputable and when
Dr.Golds suggested I look into supplying one of the banks, I
decided what the heck— it can’t hurt.