Submissive Beauty (35 page)

“You don’t think it’s weird?”

“What? That your submission is tied to them both?”

She nodded.

“You opened your mind to the reality once then you got scared. Stop thinking like a vanilla woman and only consider what matters here.” He pointed to her heart. “You learn pretty quick in this lifestyle that there is no one way or right way that fits all. We all have to find what works for each of us and embrace it.”

Maybe. Her head pounded with possibilities and confusion. She couldn’t see how to make things right.

Jeff reached behind him and pulled an envelope from his pocket. “Here.”

She hesitated. “What is it?”

“An invitation to Rick and Diane’s collaring ceremony. They wanted me to be sure you had this.”

“What? I thought they did this a couple of weeks ago.” Yeah, on the day…

“Nope. Poor Diane came down with a horrible case of food poisoning, and they’ve been trying to reschedule ever since.”

“When is it?”

“Tomorrow evening and you will be there. Is that understood?”

Her heart pounded in her chest. This was at Sanctuary, and she’d have no choice but to face Thomas and David both.

“I…I…”

“No, Gabby, I’m serious. You will be there if I have to take you there myself.”

The firm set of his mouth and the look in his eye gave her no doubt that he would drag her there by the hair if he had to. She knew what kind of Dom he was, and she wouldn’t put it past him to hogtie her and deliver her to Sanctuary by force if that’s what it took.

“You will be there,” he commanded.

“Yes, Sir.”

Jeff patted her on the knee. “That’s the good girl I know and love. Just go, and don’t worry about what will or won’t happen. It’ll all work out the way it’s supposed to.”

“I hope you’re right.”

“I’m almost always right.” The words came out light, but Gabby didn’t miss the fleeting moment of wistful longing written across his face.

“What will you do now?”

“Hard to say. Like you, I feel betrayed and only time will tell if we can all get past it.”

She stood and wrapped her arms around him, wishing she could take his pain away with hers. “I’m sorry for you too, you know?”

“Thank you.”

One of his fingers touched to the collar she still wore at her neck. “From the first day I met you, I knew you needed a collar. I wasn’t sure any one Dom could be what you needed them to be, and now, I see why. You needed two. This is right for you, and you must know that, or you wouldn’t still be wearing this.”

She didn’t know what to say. She’d stared at herself in the mirror for hours trying to get the nerve to take it off. She’d given herself every pep talk she could think of and still nothing. He was right. She wasn’t ready to give up just yet.

“Now, go get ready because you have a ceremony to go to in a few hours.”

She squeaked. “It’s today? But you said… Are you kidding?”

A broad grin crossed his face.

“Oh my God, you did that on purpose.”

“Would you expect anything less? Giving you time to talk yourself out of it was not an option. I’ll just see myself out.”

She considered biting his head off, but instead, she swallowed her words and a little bit of her pride.

“Thank you, Jeff.”

“Don’t thank me quite yet. Tell me how you feel later when I see you at Sanctuary.” He turned and walked through her gate whistling while he went.

Why did she get the sinking feeling that he done more than manipulate her into going to the ceremony? What else had he done? But more importantly, what the hell was she going to wear?

Chapter Twenty-Four

Thomas stared at the phone, contemplating. He’d already tried so many times to see her, and so far, she’d refused. The first week, he’d agreed that she needed some time and had accepted her requests not bother her, but the last seven days had grown unbearable until he’d decided come hell or high water that damn woman would talk to him this weekend.

He’d discovered, to his own surprise, that he couldn’t even sleep in his bed without her. Hell, he didn’t want to. Even David had moved back to his old room while Thomas had taken to the couch. When he could sleep. Most nights, he prowled the rooms seeing Gabrielle everywhere.

Now, she wouldn’t come out of her house. David had described her broken, and all Thomas could see was history repeating itself. He scrubbed his face, wishing the memories would die. He needed to be whole.

No more waiting. One way or another, her time was up. Tonight after the ceremony, he’d drag David with him to her place, and they weren’t leaving until she heard him out, until she told him to his face whether or not she would still wear his collar. His feelings had gone far beyond a simple training collar. He wanted forever.

Tap. Tap. Tap
.

“I don’t want to be disturbed before the ceremony,” he answered gruffly.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you,” a familiar voice sounded from the doorway.

No.

Thomas whipped his chair around to confirm that, yes, Gabrielle had come to him. His beauty.

He tried to form words, to keep things light, but holy hell, she was a vision. Beautiful curls surrounded her face. Her eyes were cast downward, drawing his focus to her clothing. His mouth went dry, and he fought not to swallow his tongue. She wore a pink corset cinched so tight her waist nipped-in several inches and her breasts swelled from the cups, threatening to spill out. A small flared skirt made of delicate pink lace covered her hips, stopping at mid-thigh. The outfit highlighted her shapely legs showcased in the highest fuck-me heels he’d ever seen her wear.

In the time it had taken to appraise her outfit, his dick had gotten half hard and his heart had tripled its beat.

“You are not disturbing me. On the contrary, I’ve never seen a more beautiful sight.”

He stood and walked around his desk, barely controlling the urge to gather her in his arms and thank her for returning. He needed to play this cool, not scare her away. As grateful as he was to see her, his dominant side still wanted to turn her over his knee and spank the fire out of her. Under normal circumstances, he would have demanded her attention before now, but these weren’t exactly normal circumstances. He’d not been particularly forthcoming about his past, and the fact that it came wrapped up in her best friend’s betrayal made it even worse.

He didn’t blame her for not talking to anyone. But nobody said he had to be rational at all times. And seeing her like this, standing innocently in his doorway with his collar around her neck, he wanted nothing more than to assert his ownership once again.

“I wasn’t planning to come.”

“I’m really glad you did, although David hasn’t arrived yet.”

“I know. I came early on purpose.”

“Oh?”

“I’m afraid.”

“Why?” He held back, letting her wander into the room. He needed to keep some space between them so she could ask what she’d come to find out. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“No, I don’t believe you want to, but that doesn’t mean it won’t happen. Seeing you here, standing so close to where you and An—”

She stopped, and it dawned on him that confronting him here in his office was making it worse.

“Would you like to come outside on the balcony? I promise I’ll be good and let you say what you need to before I try to ravish you.”

“Not funny.”

“Wasn’t meant to be.”

Her gaze drilled into him, watching him like a hawk. So far, she wasn’t giving an inch, and that thought filled him with pride. He didn’t want her to be a doormat. She needed to be able to stand up for herself and demand what she wanted when the time was right.

The standoff continued. He rigidly held his place, and her back stiffened with each passing second. The tension in the room mounted until he thought she might turn and run. To his surprise, she relented and headed toward the balcony doors and out into the night air.

Thomas sucked in a few deep breaths and exhaled slowly. He would contain himself. He had to. He suspected if he pushed she would succumb to him, but that would not be the true submission he wanted. It had to come from her.

When he exited his office and out into the starless night, he realized he’d not turned on the fountain lights yet. He could still make out her faint silhouette against the railing, but not being able to see the expressions on her face or the way her gaze devoured everything around her would never be acceptable. He walked to the switches on the wall and made some adjustments until the soft lighting accompanied by the whispered tinkling of the water filled the air around them.

For a brief moment, a smile upturned the corners of her mouth as she realized what he’d done then she quickly schooled it away.

His little girl wasn’t giving in without her answers.

He stepped to the railing, keeping a respectable distance between them. He followed the direction of her gaze into the gardens below where the landscaper had been instructed to hang new white lights in many of the trees to light a path that wove around the house and into a few private and not so private alcoves for outdoor scenes.

The grounds were protected from the view of outsiders, but here inside the house, a couple balconies as well as many of the upstairs bedroom windows served as viewing areas. He could envision he, David and Gabrielle in one of the alcoves. She loved the garden, and it suited her so well. What better place to spend a beautiful Carolina evening such as this.

“It’s beautiful out here.”

“It makes me think of you.”

She eyed him suspiciously.

“Seriously. Ever since that night in your backyard, just about any garden in the city reminds me of that night and how much you love your outdoor space. I may not have handled these new landscape changes myself because, let’s face it, I probably have a black thumb, but everything new you see down there was direct inspiration from you.”

He angled his body to hers and held out his hand, hoping she’d take it. She looked at his hand then raised her gaze to his before finally sliding her small hand into his. He needed some contact. He ached for it. He wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to pinpoint the moment he’d fallen in love with her, but his subconscious had probably known from the beginning that he wouldn’t be handing her over to David.

“Why do you only train submissives for others?”

The sudden question kicked him in the gut and knocked the wind out of him. She’d skipped everything he’d thought she’d ask and had gone straight for the jugular. His mouth opened on instinct to disagree to deny that it was all he did, but dammit, she’d been torn down by the scene with Angel and they both deserved the truth.

“Because I’m afraid.” He turned away and settled his gaze into a vacant spot in the darkness. He couldn’t see her response, didn’t want to see the hurt in her eyes.

“Of what?”

She wasn’t going to back down until he’d ripped open the wound and revealed it all. He owed her.

“I let myself get too involved when I knew better. I was brought in as a trainer.” God, if he closed his eyes, he’d still see that young, innocent face of his past. A beautiful blonde who’d been new to the scene.

“She was a new submissive with no training, but she was so young, too young. I was thirty at the time and knew, I mean my gut screamed at me that she was just a child. So much so that I’d asked for I.D. from the man who’d brought her in. Her license said twenty-one, which I didn’t believe, but she convinced me she was of age and I wanted to believe her. Something about her touched me, and I wanted to train her. The man who would be her Dom had to leave the country for a month, and he wanted someone to help her learn while he was gone. Back then, I’d already developed the reputation as someone to go to for that kind of help.”

He paused for a moment, gathering the memories a little at a time. From the corner of his eye, he saw she watched him carefully and waited for him to continue.

“I was up front with her about everything that would happen, specifically explaining things about D/s in great detail. We took the month, and I taught her as much as I could, even including some of the aspects of the lifestyle that were favored by the man who would be her Dom.”

“Did he not come back for her?”

“Oh he did, and when he’d taken her, I felt like a piece of me had gone with her. She had cried and told me that she had fallen in love with me. I understood how she felt. She had come to mean as much to me as well.”

“Did you tell her?”

He shook his head, the shame of it welling fresh inside him. “She wasn’t mine.”

“What happened?”

“She acted out, went crazy wild a few times with her Dom until he finally released her. By that time, I’d gone out of town. I needed to get away for a while, get my head on straight.”

He’d played the “if only” game so many times with himself. If only he’d been here, if only he’d told her the truth, if only he’d not let himself get attached…