The Click Trilogy (56 page)
Authors: Lisa Becker
I will have the rest of your stuff tomorrow and will leave it at the front desk of my office. You remember how to get here. It's where you returned the engagement ring Mark spent hours researching/shopping for so he could make sure to get just the right one because that's the kind of thoughtful, generous and loving man he is. The kind of man you don't deserve.
Please don't make this harder or more awkward. If you really care for Mark, leave him alone so he can move on and find happiness.
From: Shelley Manning – September 17, 2013 – 12:50 PM
To: Renee Greene
Cc: cassidy
Subject: Re: your help
Couldn't have said it better myself, unless I threw in a few expletives and profanity-laden insults to that lying bitch.
From: Renee Greene – September 17, 2013 – 12:52 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: your help
You realize that once again you didn't remove Cassidy from a cc on an email.
From: Shelley Manning – September 17, 2013 – 12:55 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: your help
Oh yes, I realize that. I did that on purpose. I wanted to let her know that I'm well aware of everything going on.
From: Renee Greene – September 17, 2013 – 12:56 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: your help
Putting the fear of God in her, huh?
From: Shelley Manning – September 17, 2013 – 12:56 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: your help
You know that's right.
From: Renee Greene – September 17, 2013 – 12:57 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: your help
And always causing trouble.
From: Shelley Manning – September 17, 2013 – 12:57 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: your help
You know that's right, too. Mwah! Mwah!
From: cassidy – September 17, 2013 – 3:34 PM
To: Renee Greene
Cc: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: your help
ill come by tomorrow afternoon.
From: PBCupLover – September 21, 2013 – 2:13 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: What the hell?
Why did a UPS truck just unload 4 enormous shipping boxes from Zappos? This stuff barely fits in the apartment. I know you love shoes, but this is ridiculous!
From: Renee Greene – September 21, 2013 – 2:17 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: What the hell?
Wow! That was fast. I thought they wouldn't arrive until Monday. Just doing some shoe shopping for the wedding. I'm just running the last of my Saturday errands. Be home soon. XO
From: PBCupLover – September 21, 2013 – 2:19 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: What the hell?
You bought all of these shoes - there must be 20 pairs of them - for the wedding? Planning some award-show-style wardrobe changes throughout the night? Don't answer that! It's like the ring is on the finger and all common sense is out the window.
From: Renee Greene – September 21, 2013 – 2:26 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: What the hell?
Calm down! There are only 18 pairs of shoes in those four boxes. Now before you get your boxers in a twist, I'm just kidding. Well, I'm not kidding about the number of shoes. There really are 18 pairs.
But I am kidding about keeping them all. You're a guy so you don't “get” shoes. It's hard to find the perfect pair of heels that aren't too high or too low, that are the right color and style, and you can wear all night long.
So I ordered every pair online that looked like even a remote possibility. I need to try them on and pick the one that's the perfect glass slipper for my fairy tale. Then I just return the rest. Free shipping and free returns. So stop hyperventilating. I know what I'm doing.
From: PBCupLover – September 21, 2013 – 2:29 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: What the hell?
All right then. Carry on.
From: Renee Greene – September 21, 2013 – 2:31 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: What the hell?
That's all. No apology for jumping to conclusions and overreacting?
From: PBCupLover – September 21, 2013 – 2:35 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: What the hell?
Considering all of the deposits I've been putting down these past few weeks for a photographer, videographer, florist, caterer, venue, etc., I figured it wasn’t that big of a leap to think you were spending more…again.
From: Renee Greene – September 21, 2013 – 2:39 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: What the hell?
You're the one who didn't want to let my parents pay for the wedding. They generously offered to foot the bill for everything. YOU declined, remember?
From: PBCupLover – September 21, 2013 – 2:41 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: What the hell?
If your parents are paying, then I may not get what I want. And I have specific interests here.
From: Renee Greene – September 21, 2013 – 2:44 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: What the hell?
Specific interests, my ass. Everytime I try to talk with you about these things, you say, "Whatever you want." The only thing you've taken an interest in is the food and the cake. Figures! I've heard of Bridezilla before, but Groomzilla?
From: PBCupLover – September 21, 2013 – 2:45 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: What the hell?
I can't tell if you are really mad at me.
From: Renee Greene – September 21, 2013 – 2:46 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: What the hell?
Of course not. I'm literally shaking my head and laughing as I wait in the line at the drycleaners.
From: PBCupLover – September 21, 2013 – 2:48 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: What the hell?
Good. I just want this to be a great day for us and that means letting you have everything you want and letting me have a peanut butter cup groom's cake.
From: Renee Greene – September 21, 2013 – 2:52 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: What the hell?
I know that, Babe. I want this to be a great day for us too. And I am being cost conscious. It's lucky for you that I am a consumate PR professional with experience planning major events and great contacts within the industry for discounts galore. We don't need to hire a wedding planner. We've got one in me.
From: PBCupLover – September 21, 2013 – 2:56 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: What the hell?
I'm thrilled to save the money on a wedding planner and appreciate your efforts to save us some dough. But I don't want this stressing you out. No use saving on a wedding planner only to need a mediator, therapist or masseuse later.
From: Renee Greene – September 21, 2013 – 2:59 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: What the hell?
Ha! Ha! I can pretty much guarantee a mediator and therapist won't be needed. But a massage sounds mighty nice. Be home soon so you can rub my aching shoulders.
From: PBCupLover – September 21, 2013 – 3:01 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: What the hell?
I'd be happy to help but I think you're going to be too busy trying on shoes.
From: Renee Greene – September 21, 2013 – 3:03 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: What the hell?
I totally forgot about all of those beautiful shoes. Squee! See you soon!
From: Renee Greene – September 26, 2013 – 1:12 PM
To: Mark Finlay
Subject: I'm here
Hi there. Just wanted to let you know that I'm here if you need anything or want to talk.
From: Mark Finlay – September 26, 2013 – 1:18 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: I'm here
I know and thanks. I just don't get it. I don't lie and pretend to be into a girl just to get her into bed. I call back and pay attention. Yet I'm single…for the minute I’m not single, I get cheated on.
From: Renee Greene – September 26, 2013 – 1:20 PM
To: Mark Finlay
Subject: Re: I'm here
You're right. It's totally not fair. You're one of the good guys and you deserve far better.
From: Mark Finlay – September 26, 2013 – 1:22 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: I'm here
I'm just going to focus on work. At least there I know that my efforts pay off.
From: Renee Greene – September 26, 2013 – 1:26 PM
To: Mark Finlay
Subject: Re: I'm here
Don't give up on love, Mark. I know you're hurting right now. Really, really hurting. But I promise you that it's out there. Things will get set right. I just know it.
From: Mark Finlay – September 26, 2013 – 1:28 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: I'm here
Thanks, Renee. Let's grab some lunch next week. Okay?
From: Renee Greene – September 26, 2013 – 1:29 PM
To: Mark Finlay
Subject: Re: I'm here
Absolutely! Hang in there!
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 11:02 AM
To: PBCupLover, Shelley Manning, Mark Finlay, Ashley Gordon
Subject: QUIT MY JOB!
Holy shit! I just quit my job. I am literally shaking and freaking out. Why is no one picking up their phones? Someone, anyone, call me. Please!!!
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 11:14 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
I just tried your cell but there's no answer. You're probably on the phone with Shelley. Call me at the office. Don't panic. Everything is going to be fine.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 11:17 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Why is your frickin' voice mail picking up again? Where are you?
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 11:19 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
I just got on a conference call that I can't get off of. I will be at least 40 more minutes. Are you okay? What happened?
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 11:32 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Neil called me into his office and told me that we just won a new global assignment and I was being assigned as the lead for the U.S. The client is Monsanto. You know, the company I believe to be greedy bastards who are poisoning the food supply with their genetically modified seeds?
I explained to him – calmly and rationally, of course – that I just couldn't in good conscience work on this account. I have a huge objection to what they do and what I think are the terrible effects their products are having on our food, the environment etc. He – calmly and rationally, of course – told me this was the single biggest account the agency has ever won and that it's not a choice. I was being assigned to this account.
I said, "Is this because of Ethan's behavior at your July 4th party?" He said no, but I'm not so sure. ;) I once again – calmly and rationally, yada yada yada – explained that I couldn't be effective on their behalf. He – VERY bluntly and rudely – said, "Renee! Either roll with it or get rolled over!" So, I walked out.
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 11:35 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
It's going to be okay. You can only shoot an arrow by pulling it backward. This is just going to launch you into something even better.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 11:36 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
OMG! Could you be any more perfect…or annoying?
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 11:37 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Perfect? Why, thank you! Annoying? WTF!
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 11:42 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
You just always have these perfect expressions for every occasion when all I really want is to feel sorry for myself and have you feel sorry for me, too.
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 11:45 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Well, I don't feel sorry for you. You can let this get you down or you can pick yourself up and get motivated to move ahead.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 11:46 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Again, could you be any more perfect…or annoying?
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 11:49 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Fine. You're right. This is the worst thing that could ever have happened to you. Your life is a mess. I don't know how you will be able to get yourself out of bed each morning. Maybe we should just stay in bed all day tomorrow…together.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 11:51 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Leave it to you to find a way to turn this around and make it about having sex.
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 11:53 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
What can I say? I have been told I couldn't be any more perfect.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 11:54 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
I wasn't suggesting that comment was an example of you being perfect.
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 11:55 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Trying to cheer you up with a day in bed certainly doesn't qualify as annoying, does it?
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 11:56 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Nah. I'm just teasing.
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 11:58 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Aha. You must be feeling better. I was going to bring a can of frosting home, but looks as though you don't need that.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 12:00 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
That truly would be the perfect – and not in the least bit annoying – thing you could do.
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 12:00 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Consider it done.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 12:01 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
But did I make a huge mistake?
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 12:14 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
When I was in business school, there was this snooty girl who had done her undergrad at Yale. She walked around like she was better than everyone because she went to an Ivy League college. Big deal!
We had this crotchety old statistics professor who would go off on tangents a lot. (Kind of like you, my love.) One day he started ranting about morals and ethics. He explained that you might be asked to do things in your career that are ethical but against your personal morals. At some point, if you can't reconcile the two, you just need to walk away, like you did (for which I'm so proud of you!).
This girl raised her hand and asked (I am just shaking my head again thinking about it), "do you mean like go into another room?" We all just whipped our heads around looking at her like we couldn't believe what a dipshit she was. She had never heard that expression before. Dr. Lowell just snapped at her. "No! I mean you quit!" What an idiot.
At least you not only have the right morals but the street smarts and savvy to know you'll be okay.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 12:15 PM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
At this moment, I'm not so sure.
From: PBCupLover – October 3, 2013 – 12:19 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
I am! See you at home later where we'll talk all of this through. In the meantime, I'm proud of you, Babe, for standing up for your convictions. I love you.
From: [email protected] – October 3, 2013 – 12:31 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: I'm with you!
I just tried calling your cell phone, but you didn't pick up. I imagine you are talking with your fiancé right now. Anyway, I wanted you to know that I think what you did is just amazing. Quitting your job because of this is incredibly noble. So much so, that I just quit, too.
I don't know if you have a plan of where you're going to go next, but I'm sure you do. You're so organized and on top of things. Just know, I want to go with you. So call me.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 3:32 PM
To: PBCupLover, Shelley Manning, Mark Finlay, Ashley Gordon
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
Sorry all. I know I told you all to call me and then I didn't answer my phone.
I initially panicked and felt like I needed to talk, but then panicked and realized I needed some time to sort all of this out. What the hell was I thinking quitting my job before having another job...and in this shitty economy?
And not only that, but now I have another person to worry about. Skinny Skye pulled a "Jerry Maguire" and walked out after what I did in solidarity with me. She doesn't have a job lined up either but was certain that I knew what the hell I was doing. What the hell am I doing?!?
From: Ashley Gordon – October 3, 2013 – 3:54 PM
To: PBCupLover, Shelley Manning, Mark Finlay, Renee Greene
Subject: Re: QUIT MY JOB!
You're not picking up. Hope you are doing okay. Call me when you get this message. I'm here. Or come over if you want to. Just do me a favor and DON'T ring the doorbell. I don't know if Siobhan will be napping and I don't want to risk waking her up. She's been teething and if I can get her down, then I want to let her sleep.
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 3:59 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: HR Question
I'm freaking out! I gather you're busy because you haven't emailed me or called me back. I could really use your help. Can you see what legal rights I have with regard to my job?
From: [email protected] – October 3, 2013 – 4:02 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Exit materials
Renee: I'm emailing to let you know that pursuant to your dismissal from The Carr Agency, a packet of exit materials is being mailed to the home address we have on file for you. In addition, you will receive a check for your last days worked and your severance pay - two weeks for each year of service to the agency. Please don't hesitate to contact me with any questions.
From: Karen Corley – October 3, 2013 – 4:11 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: On your side
Renee: I'm now emailing you from my personal account because I didn't want there to be a record of this email on the agency's servers. I'm SO sorry to hear that you have left. You were truly my favorite account person. You were always so respectful and appreciative of the job we have in HR. We all know why you quit and support you in your decision to stand up for what you believe in.
But if you quit, you don't get severance pay. So I coded your exit as a dismissal so you're now eligible for both severance and unemployment benefits. Knowing you, you won't be unemployed for long, so you probably won't even need to file.
But I figured the extra months of severance you've earned would help ease the financial burden until you figure something out.
Please don't share this email with anyone at the agency, or I'll get fired and will wish I had a severance package of my own. Wishing you the absolute best of luck!
Best, Karen
From: Renee Greene – October 3, 2013 – 4:18 PM
To: Karen Corley
Subject: Re: On your side
Karen: You are a rock star. Thank you! Thank you! First, thank you for saying such nice things about me. I truly did (or should I still say do) appreciate all of your efforts in making sure everyone in the office is doing the right thing and getting all they deserve.
And more importantly, thank you for looking out for me. While being "dismissed" – which is a total euphemism for being sacked – is not something I ever wanted on my permanent record (that sounds so elementary school), it never occurred to me why that was so much better than quitting.