The Complete Burn for Burn Trilogy: Burn for Burn; Fire With Fire; Ashes to Ashes (64 page)

I touch my head and make sure my hair is still in place. It
took me so damn long to get my finger waves to work. I had to
wash my hair in the sink twice and start over. The whole time
I was thinking . . . How good can a high school party actually
be? I had no clue. Just like Mary, I’d never really been to one
before.

I’ve heard about Rennie’s infamous parties for years. Rolled
my eyes while other people told stories of her bashes rotten
with pilfered booze and barely legal shenanigans. But tonight
I have to hand it to her. Her party is truly, all-out, undiluted
Rennie Holtz. Crystal punch bowls, vintage barware, linen
napkins. The DJ, the bouncers, everyone in costume. And not
lame versions of costumes either, the way some people phone
it in for Halloween. All the invited guests have stepped up
their game tonight. If I hadn’t done the damn finger waves, I
would have looked like a jerk.

It’s insanely impressive, especially because it’s not like
Rennie has the money to buy whatever she needs to do it up
right. It must have taken serious work to make something so
luxe on the cheap.

Rennie should do this for a living. Party planning, I mean.
No joke. I’m going to tell her that when I see her.
As crazy as it is for me to admit: I’m actually happy I’m
here.
The whole afternoon I steeled myself for the inevitable dirty
looks, the “Why the eff is that piece of trash here?” whispers.
Everyone knows Rennie and I have a past. And even though
I’m dressed the part—my hair, a black slip, fishnets, and a silver cigarette case—they’d know I didn’t belong. Not really.
Turns out I didn’t have anything to worry about. Everyone’s
been . . . nice to me. They’ve said “Whassup, Kat!” and “Happy
New Year!” and “Yo, DeBrassio!” Some girls even hugged
me. These are all people I haven’t talked to in forever. People
I’ve ignored, I’ve iced out for the last four years. Everything’s
thawed tonight.
Just like that.
I take another sip of my whiskey and push through the
crowd toward the front of the gallery space. The plate-glass
window is fogged with condensation, and I wipe at it so I
can see outside. Where’s Mary? She should have been here by
now. There’s a line of people trying to get in, kids shoving
their hands into their blazers and girls shivering in whispery
dresses. I catch myself grinning. They probably don’t know
the password.
I feel something tickle my arm. A feather.
I look over and see Ashlin.
“Hello,” she says, slurry, and takes a dainty sip of her
champagne out of a glass flute. Ashlin’s dress is short and completely covered in pale pink sequins. It’s skin tight, and her
freaking huge boobs look like they’re going to spill right over
the top. She has a black mole drawn on her left cheek, and her
eyelids are bright with glitter.
“Yo,” I say, and shrug the strap of my slip back up onto my
shoulder.
She tickles me again with a feather. It must have fallen off
her purse. The purse looks like a pink baby chicken, tiny and
covered with feathers. “Um, just curious, but does Rennie
know you’re here?”
I stare her down. This freaking bimbo. Is she seriously that
dumb? Does she think I would show up here if I wasn’t specifically invited?
But I haven’t seen Rennie tonight. Not yet, anyway. I get
a knot in my stomach. I wonder if this isn’t a trick about to
blow up in my face That midnight surprise she wanted me here
to see.
Suddenly I see Reeve and Lillia push out the front door.
What?
And then Rennie’s behind them, running after them. She’s
quiet, not saying anything, but I can tell she’s upset. Reeve
and Lillia are gone, and Rennie stops in the center of the
dance floor. Nobody even notices her. Nobody except Ashlin
and me.
Rennie magically turns to us and walks over, looking suddenly unsteady on her high heels. As she gets closer, her chin
starts to quiver, and I know tears are about to drop. I take a
step to the side to give her room to approach Ashlin.
“Ren!” Ashlin says brightly, because she’s an idiot. “Let’s
dance!”
Rennie pushes right past Ashlin and practically falls into
my arm. I glance behind me, trying to look out the window to
see where Reeve and Lil went, but it’s fogged back up.
Ashlin is next to us, swaying drunkenly and looking confused. And then I see other people, people around the room,
starting to notice us. Notice Ren.
“Kat. Lillia did it. Lillia’s the one who drugged him.” She
can barely make the words. She is grabbing me tight with her
fingertips. And she is shaking.
I pull her toward the bathroom. “Come on.”
On our way, we pass Alex. I smile politely, but Rennie spots
him and says, “Your girl is a two-timing slut whore!” And
Alex looks dumbfounded.
In the bathroom, I lock the door. I pour out what’s left of
my whiskey and fill the cup full of tap water and hand it to her.
“Now what the hell is going on?”
Rennie takes a few small sips, but with her tears she almost
chokes. “She knew. She knew I loved him and she stole him
from me. That bitch gets everything she wants! How is that
fair? How is that at all fair?”
I swallow the urge to tell Rennie about our plan. To confess
to her that Lillia doesn’t actually want anything to do with
Reeve. It would make it all better, stat. But I don’t say anything because . . . has Lillia gone rogue? I thought we were
done with that shit after Lillia stood Reeve up for his mom’s
open house. Did she figure out a new, better way to hurt
Reeve? Maybe she hasn’t had a chance to tell us what it is yet.
“Calm down, calm down,” I say. “What were you talking
about out there? What about . . . drugs?”
She looks up at me from the floor of the bathroom. Her eye
makeup is two huge black smudges. She opens the bathroom
sink cabinet and pulls out a stack of pictures. And there it is,
a picture from homecoming. Two girls, arm in arm, smiling
together. It takes me a minute to notice what’s happening in
the background.
It’s Lillia slipping the liquid E into Reeve’s drink while he
looks in the other direction.
I grab the towel rack to steady myself.
“I told him and he didn’t even care! He wants to be with
her. They freaking ran off hand in hand!”
My head is spinning, and it’s way too fucking hot in here.
“Ren, I don’t know what this proves,” I say, even though it
basically proves everything.
She lets out a bitter bark of a laugh. “Look close. She’s got
some kind of vial in her hand. It’s got to be liquid E. There’s
only one place to get drugs like that. That piece-of-shit skank
Kevin. He sells to the guys at the restaurant. I bet if I ask him,
he’ll remember selling it to some Asian girl.”
Except Kevin didn’t sell it to Lillia. He sold it to me.
Oh fuck.
I check my phone for a text from Lillia. Nothing. Does she
not realize that everything’s about to blow up in our faces?
There’s a knock on the bathroom door. I scream out,
“Damn! Someone’s in here!”
“Kat?” It’s Alex. “Um, is Lillia in there with you guys? Or
did you see her leave?”
Rennie throws her head back and explodes. “Alex, Lillia
doesn’t give two shits about you! Get it through your thick
skull, you dumb-ass! She’s with
Reeve
. You’re just her lapdog!”
Rennie opens her mouth to scream at him again, but I cover
it with my hand and open the door a crack. Alex is standing
there, mouth hanging open. I say to him, “Sorry, can you just
give us a minute?” and then I close the door again.
Rennie wipes under her eyes. “Lillia’s so done. If Reeve
doesn’t care about what she did, everyone else here will.
They’ll all hate her just as much as I do. Where’s Nadia? Did
you see her out there?”
Oh shit. I’ve gotta contain this.
“Let’s just get out of here,” I say. “If we hurry, we can catch
up to them.” I expect her to fight me, but she doesn’t, and that
makes me feel sad for her. She holds out her hands, and I pull
her up like a rag doll. “Where’s your purse?”
“I didn’t bring one.”
Shit. I didn’t drive here. Pat dropped me off. But I don’t
want to waste the time it’s going to take to text him to pick us
up. “Did you drive?”
Rennie nods. “My Jeep’s parked out back. The key’s inside
it.”
I open the bathroom door a tiny crack and peek out. Luckily,
it’s near midnight; people have started moving into the main
room of the gallery. Ashlin is handing out noisemakers. Alex is
standing in the party, but his eyes keep moving from the front
door to his cell phone.
I take Rennie by the hand and run for the back door. We
go outside and it’s bitter cold. I stop her from getting into the
driver’s seat. “You’re too upset,” I tell her. “I’ll drive.”
The air seems to be rousing Rennie. Her eyes are dark with
anger and her fists are clenching and unclenching. She stares at
me, but thankfully she doesn’t fight me.
I turn the car on and blast the heat, even though it’s cold
at first. The whooshing sound makes it so neither of us has to
talk. I gun it out of the parking lot, and as I turn past the party,
I look again for Mary. Where the hell is she?
Rennie says, “Where do you think they went?”
“I don’t know,” I say truthfully. “Let’s swing by my house
and regroup. We’ll figure out what to do.”
Rennie stares out the window; her eyes are laser beams.
“When I find them, they’re so dead.” Every car that passes,
she looks to see who might be in it.
To be honest, I feel bad for her. Not getting to enjoy her
own party after she worked so hard on it. I don’t even know
what to believe right now, but I can’t help feeling pissed at
Lillia.
This better be a huge misunderstanding. I can’t even think
about the alternative, if Rennie somehow has this right in her
head. If Reeve and Lillia have something real going, I’ll kill
Lillia myself. Because doing that to Mary would be the most
fucked-up thing in the whole world.
We get to my house. Rennie and I both get out of her Jeep.
She slams her door loud, and with too much force. She’s still
pissed. Really really pissed.
“Give me my keys,” Rennie says. “I’ll drive by the cliffs.
You check the dunes.”
I have this feeling, this terrible feeling that something bad is
going to happen.
I squeeze my hand around her keys. The ring is full of
charms and shit that dig into my hands. “Are you sure you’re
okay to drive? You’re so upset. And you’ve been drinking.”
“I’m fine.” She takes the keys out of my hand. As she does,
she looks up at me and gives me a half smile. I get the feeling
that she’s happy I’m not giving her a guilt trip or a hard sell or
offering to sleep over so I can babysit her. We never had that
kind of friendship anyway. So it seems weird to try and have
it now.
I get in the car as Rennie peels out.
But I don’t drive to the dunes, like she wants. I drive back
to the party. I have to get those pictures, before anyone else
finds them.
I hope Lillia knows what she’s doing. ’Cause if she doesn’t,
we’re dead.
CHAP
TER SIX
T
Y -ONE

I don’t know how I make myself get up off the
ground and go to Rennie’s party. I’m in such a fog; I feel like
I’m floating outside my body, watching myself move down the
streets. Snow has started falling, tiny gentle flakes, dusting the
ground and the trees and the dead grass. I can’t even feel the
cold. I try to swallow, but my throat is closed. What happened
to my dad? Why didn’t my mom let me go with her? Did they
really leave me all alone?

My powers couldn’t stop them.
When I get down to T-Town, I break into a run, all the way
to the gallery. I need to find Lillia and Kat. They’ll help me.
They’ll help me find my mom and Aunt Bette.

I reach the gallery door and come face-to-face with a
bouncer in a black pinstripe suit and black fedora pulled low
over his eyes. I think about trying to slip right past him, but
he’s so big, he fills the door frame like a human wall. Just
beyond him I hear music and laughter and merriment, and it
makes my chest hurt, because I’m so far from any of that right
now. I doubt I’ll ever laugh again.

“I need to find my friends,” I say, desperate, breathless.
“They’re inside.”
He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even raise his chin so I can
look him in the eyes.
Crap. The stupid speakeasy password. What was it? I had
it written down, in my purse. I rack my brain but I can’t hold
on to any thought. It’s all a jumble. “Please, sir. Please. This is
an emergency.”
Again the bouncer doesn’t say anything. I wonder how
many kids he’s turned away tonight. People Rennie didn’t
think belonged in her company. I pull on my hair, hard, but it
doesn’t hurt, and I concentrate all my energy on willing myself
to remember. “I know there’s a password to get in. My friend
told me. I . . . I even know the special one where I don’t have to
pay a cover charge. Rennie invited us herself. But I—I . . . My
friend Kat, she’s definitely inside. She has short black hair.”
The bodyguard arches his back into a deep, long stretch, and
then fishes a flask out of his jacket pocket.
I think about trying to ask for Rennie, but she probably
wouldn’t let me in. Not after the way I acted when Aunt Bette
came to the gallery to get her paintings back. I can’t even bribe
my way in with money because I don’t have a red cent on me.
It finally comes to me. “Moonshine! Moonshine!
Moonshine!” I shout it as loud as I can, but the bodyguard still
pretends not to hear me. It’s like I’m not even standing in front
of him. My lips quiver and the tears come. What’s happening?
“Please,” I’m begging. “Please let me in.” Only it’s no use.
I walk backward away from him and try peeking through
the foggy glass in the front window. I don’t see Kat or Lillia
inside, can’t make either of them out in the crowds of revelers.
But I know they are here. I can feel it. I sit down on the curb
and touch for my heartbeat, because it feels like it’s pounding in my chest, but I can’t feel a thing. Probably because it’s
broken.
And then, suddenly, I turn my head back to the gallery
door, and there’s Lillia standing out front on the curb. She’s
shivering in a thin dress and her stockings. Is she looking for
me? She must have felt that I needed her.
I step toward her, but then Reeve appears, carrying her coat.
He wraps her in it. They run across the street, and Reeve picks
up Lillia and puts her inside the cab of his truck. They seem
like they’re in a hurry.
They kiss on the lips before they drive away. A tender, slow,
warm kiss.
Oh no. Oh no.
I turn around; I’m spinning. I can’t breathe. It’s like I’ve
been kicked in the stomach. From out the back of the store,
Rennie’s white Jeep goes flying down the road in the other
direction. Kat’s behind the wheel.
I lift a shaky hand and push my hair behind my ears. I’ve
got nowhere to go, no idea what’s going on. My whole world
is falling apart.
Maybe I can catch Mom and Aunt Bette before the ferry
leaves. I can make them take me with them. So I run. I run as
fast as I can, my shoes slipping on the slick roads, and scream,
“Wait for me! Wait for me!” until my throat is raw. I know
they won’t hear me, I’m too far, but I have to do something.
I get to the ferry landing. Normally bright, tonight it’s
cloaked in darkness. I search the parking lot, but it’s empty. A
thick metal chain ropes off the entrance. All the white lights
running along the planks are turned off. The ferry has stopped
running. Mom and Aunt Bette must have boarded the last one.
They’re gone.
I don’t even know what to do. I head up the hill, sobbing. I
don’t know how long I walk for.
A white Jeep pulls up beside me. Inside is Rennie. I can tell
she’s been crying, the way her makeup raccoons around her eyes.
“Are you okay?”
I stumble up to the Jeep. I see myself reflected in the glass.
I’m not in my party dress, but in a pair of still-damp jeans and
a wet white T-shirt, speckled with gravel and dirt, clinging to
my rolls of fat. I look down, and there are my old sneakers,
soaked through with water.
I try to answer Rennie but I can’t. I’m choking on my tears.
She tells me to get in. I don’t move. She opens the door for
me and I finally climb in.
“Where do you live? Where are your parents?”
Maybe she knows where Kat is. Or Lillia. Maybe she can
take me to them. I try to ask her, to make words, but nothing
comes out of my mouth. It’s like I’m choking. Like something
is around my neck, squeezing it closed. I can feel my eyes
bulge out of my head. My lungs burn for oxygen.
Rennie’s scared; I can tell she’s scared. “Just breathe. It’s
going to be okay. Just breathe.”