The Fading Trilogy: Fading, Freeing, Falling: Includes 2 BONUS short stories: Hoping and Finding Forever (86 page)

Closing the fridge, Mark’s mother says, “The cups are in that cabinet over there,” as she nods her head towards the sink.

Mark takes a seat at the table as I get my drink. I like that his mom didn’t get it for me, that she would treat me as if I’ve been in this house a hundred times before. She turns and smiles at me as I walk over to the table and sit with Mark and his father.

“The weather is supposed to turn bad this weekend, so your mom is insisting that the Christmas lights go up tomorrow.”

“Great, I’m back for all of five minutes, and you’re telling me I have to freeze my ass off all day tomorrow?” Mark says as he laughs.

“Blame that woman over there,” he says as he points to his wife, who is taking a plate of food out of the microwave. “I have to freeze my ass off too.”

“Oh, please. You men are pathetic.” She sets down a plate of lasagna and salad in front of me as she adds, “There are three of you; there is no way it will take you all day.”

She hands me a fork, and I thank her when Mark looks at her and says, “Then I demand steaks for dinner.”

I laugh and shake my head when Ben slaps his shoulder in approval, and clarifies, “Ribeyes.”

“Fine. No more complaining,” she tells the two of them and hands Mark his plate.

The both of us eat as Ben starts talking and asking Mark and I about school. My father and I haven’t spoken since I told him I was gay, and I can only imagine how skittish he would be around me, now that he knows. Although I’m feeling comfortable hanging out here with Mark and his parents, the idea of Mark touching me in front of them makes me anxious. It’s almost like I’m a college buddy of his spending the holiday with his family, not his boyfriend. I guess I’m waiting for the
look
. The freak-out. The ‘oh my God, he’s gay’ reaction.

We finish eating and clean up our mess before saying good night to Mark’s parents. Grabbing our bags, we head upstairs to Mark’s room.

“Come on,” he says. “I’ll introduce you to my sisters. Fair warning, they have no filter.”

We walk down the hall, and when Mark opens the door, the first thing I hear is a high-pitched, “God, Mark! Knock much?”

I can’t help the burst of laughter that comes out of me as I step into the room. The two girls are lying on the bed, huddled over a laptop, looking at us.

“Whatever. Jase, this is Emily and Erin.”

I knew that Mark’s sisters were twins, but they seriously look just alike. Both with long, straight brown hair and the same bright, green eyes that Mark has.

They clamber out of bed and not only give Mark hugs, but me as well. Mark has told me that he’s really close with his sisters, but seeing them now, I can’t help the twinge of jealousy that creeps in, only wishing it was my own sister I was hugging. He’s lucky to have them.

“When did you get here?” he asks them.

“After finals last week. The dorms emptied out, so we went ahead and came home a couple days early.”

“So . . . Jase . . .” Erin says as she shoots me a flirty wink.

When I cock my head at her, slightly amused, her eyes begin to pan down the length of me in a dramatic fashion. I laugh at her blatant nature as Mark says with annoyance to Erin, “You’re seriously messed up.”

“This is almost too much,” I chuckle out when Emily breaks out into a fit of laughter as well.

“Yeah, I agree. We’ll see you two in the morning,” Mark tells them, and when we walk out, the two of them burst out laughing. I can’t help but do the same as Mark looks at me with an apologetic look on his face.

We head back to his room, unpack, and get ready for bed. It’s a bit odd to be sleeping in the same room as him in his parents’ home, but I try to shake off my insecure feelings for the sake of Mark. Sliding into bed, it feels so good to finally be lying down. It’s been a long day, and I huddle down under the blankets, wrapping myself around Mark.

I close my eyes, and I’m about to fall asleep when we hear squealing from the next room where his sisters are. Mark sits up and looks down at me for a second before shifting to his knees and placing his ear on the wall.

“What the hell are you doing?” I ask.

“Shhh.” He stays there, eavesdropping for a moment, when he whispers, “I can’t make out what they’re saying.”

“Oh my God, you are just as crazy as they are.”

We hear another squeal, and Mark jumps out of bed.

“What are you doing?”

As he slips on a pair of pajama pants, he says, “I’m gonna see what they’re up to.”

As tired as I am, I am getting a major kick out of seeing this new side of Mark. He quietly walks across the room and slowly opens the door, trying hard to not make any noise. He looks back at me, and nods his head for me to follow. Sighing, I get out of bed and follow him to his sisters’ door. With his hand on the handle, he quickly opens the door, barging in. One of the girls is sitting at the desk, on the computer and the other one is standing on top of the bed.

“What’s going on in here?” Mark asks, and Erin jumps off the bed, runs over to us, and drags us in, shutting the door quietly behind us.

“Jesus, you’re loud. You’re gonna wake up Mom and Dad,” she snaps at him before glancing at me, or rather, my bare chest. “God, you’re hot.”

“What?” I say at the same time Marks asks, “What the hell’s the matter with you?”

“Geez, nothing!”

“Em, dish it. What has the two of you acting so secretive?” Mark asks as I walk over and sit on the edge of the bed.

“You have to promise to not say anything to Mom and Dad.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Okay, so there’s this guy, Travis, that is totally hot and all. I mean, seriously. This guy is like—”

“Get to the point,” Mark interrupts.

“Anyway. Erin is like madly in love with this guy—”

“No, I’m not!”

“Okay, I’m out,” Mark tells them as he starts heading for the door.

“Fine. Jase will help us,” Emily says.

“I don’t even know what’s going on here,” I say in complete confusion.

When Erin finally stops molesting my chest with her eyes, she looks up at me and pleads, “You have to take us to this party tomorrow night.”

“What?” Mark asks.

“Umm, excuse me. I’m talking to Jase.”

“Why do you need us to take you to a party? Just go,” he tells her.

Getting up from the computer, Emily walks over and sits down on the bed with Erin and me. “Because, there is no way that Mom will let us go to a party the night before Thanksgiving. But if we say that the four of us are going out together, you know, like a brother-sister type thing, then I know they won’t question it.”

Laughing at their scheming, I say, “I’m in.”

Erin wraps her arms around me when Mark glares at me with a look of complete betrayal, and I laugh at him. “It sounds completely harmless,” I tell him.

“I already love you,” Emily tells me as I hear Mark let out a deep breath. “Oh, come on, Mark. Even Jase is cool with it.”

“How old is this guy?” he asks.

“I don’t know. He’s in his third year,” Erin says when she finally lets go of me. “What does it matter?”

“Because you’re nineteen and my sister. It matters.”

Suddenly thinking about Candace, I stand up, taking Mark’s side, and tell them, “We’ll go, but we’re staying with you.”

“Yeah, I agree,” Mark says, probably understanding my change of tone.

“Are you serious?” Emily questions, clearly not liking that her older brother is, in a sense, chaperoning them.

“Em, who cares?” Erin says. “Maybe Travis will get jealous when he sees me with Jase.”

Tilting my head at her in disbelief, she defends, “What? I get that you’re gay and all, but who knew my brother would snag a hottie? So yeah, I plan on using you.”

With mild laughter, I say, “This is slightly uncomfortable.”

“No shit,” Mark says as he turns to walk out, and I follow.

When we get back into bed, I replay the last ten minutes and begin to laugh.

“What’s so funny?” Mark asks.

“You weren’t kidding around about them.”

“No, man. They’re crazy as hell. All the women in this family are.”

I’m glad that they are because it takes my mind off of the nerves of being here. I like Mark’s family, and his sisters make it all that much better, because even though they are completely different than Jace, they kinda remind me of her.

Mark runs his hand behind my neck and asks, “What are you thinking about?”

I tug him close to me, when I say, “I’m glad I came.”

“Me too.”

We lay there for a moment, silent, before I say, “Your dad seems really great.” I just wish my own could be as understanding as his.

“It’s not easy on him, you know?”

“What do you mean?”

He shifts slightly before continuing. “He had a really difficult time with it at first. It’s just been hard on him. He’s a work in progress.”

I nod my head, not really knowing how to respond. I’d like to think maybe my father could come around as well, but I think that’s a far cry from my reality.

Interrupting my thoughts, he adds, “I don’t want you to think my family’s perfect. Things weren’t always like they are now, but they’ve known for a few years. It wasn’t just me coming to terms with it; they had to as well.”

“I don’t see that happening for me, for my parents, I mean,” I tell him. I can hope, but what’s hope? My hopes are rarely ever fulfilled.

Mark pulls me in closer, his body warm against mine. “Maybe it’s just another piece I can fill for you.”

I smile and remember our conversation from the other week. Not wanting to deny his words, I simply whisper in response, “Yeah, maybe,” before I cover his lips with mine.

Although the both of us are exhausted from the day of traveling, we spend a good amount of time quietly kissing before falling asleep.

There’s a knock on the door as I’m slipping on one of my old UW hooded sweatshirts. I open the door to Erin standing there, still in her pajamas. Walking into the room, she jumps onto the bed and asks, “Where’s Mark?”

“Taking a shower.”

“Is he gonna talk to Mom about tonight?”

“He didn’t say,” I answer as I sit next to her.

“Say what?” I turn to see Mark as he’s walking out of the bathroom.

“Are you going to talk to Mom about tonight?”

“Yeah, I’ll talk to her,” he says as he grabs his clothes and heads back into the bathroom.

I turn to look at Erin, and she has a huge smile on her face.

“Who’s going to this party anyway?” I ask.

“People from Kent State that live around here.”

“That’s where you go?”

“Yeah. Em and I are freshmen,” she tells me. “So, you’re an Architect major with Mark?”

“Yeah.”

“You’ve known him this whole time?” she asks as she leans against the headboard, getting comfortable.

“Sort of. We never really spoke until this summer.”

“Well, for what it’s worth, he seems really happy,” she says with a grin right before Mark comes back out. “Why are you guys dressed so early?” she asks as she looks between the two of us.

“It’s not
that
early, but Mom wants the lights up today, so we’re gonna be stuck on the roof for the next several hours.”

Hopping off the bed, she prances out of the room, calling, “Have fun with that!”

Mark closes the door and locks it before walking toward me and hovering his body over mine, pushing me back onto the bed.

“What are you doing?” I barely get out when Mark starts kissing me.

Mumbling over the skin on my neck as he moves his lips down, he says, “Not being able to touch you is going to drive me crazy today.”

His words unintentionally make me feel guilty. He knows I’m not comfortable with anything physical in front of his family, and I hate that I’m still holding back with him. I don’t want to. I don’t want to pretend to be something we’re not. And we are
not
distant.