The Heart's Ashes (20 page)

“
Then, isn’t fear of David enough of a reason to make yourself
stop?”

“
Not right now. If the law passes, yes, but right now, while
I’m hungry, the punishment isn’t grave enough, and, truthfully, I
could hide your body where no one would ever find it. No one would
ever know I did it.”

I swallowed,
tracing the mane on my pony as the ride began to slow. “Okay. Go
eat, then.”

“
Okay. And...do you still wanna...?” his tone rolled away to
suggestion.

“
Yeah, I—” My words stopped with a quick turn of my head as a
familiar face flashed past us for a split second. And when we came
back around again, it was gone.

“
Amara? What is it?”

“
I—” I searched the carnival grounds. “I thought I just saw
David.”

Eric looked
behind him, then back at me. “It won’t be him.”

“
I know. I just—”

“
You just wish.” He sighed as we came to a stop.

“
Mm-hm.” I nodded, not meeting his eyes, but revelling in the
way he gently combed the ends of my hair.

“
I can make you forget about him. Just one night with me, and
you’ll never think of him again.”

“
Fine.” My gut churned. I wasn’t sure if it was because I just
decided to give my virginity up for the sake of getting past my
true love, or if it was because the ride had come to a complete
stop but my stomach hadn’t realised yet.

“
Fine what? What’s fine?”

“
Just take me back to your house. Make love to me.”

“
Make love?”

“
Uh, yeah.” I smiled bashfully. “I guess I
mean...um...sex.”

“
Now, sex, I can do.”

I nodded,
still feeling the burn of my flushing cheeks.

“
Are you sure about this?” He lifted my chin.

“
Yes. I’m sick of it, Eric. It’ll help me move on. I’m tired
of thinking about them all the time.”

“
Who’s
them
?”

“
Mike and David.”

Eric clenched
his fists slightly and took a breath. “Both of them, huh?”

I nodded.

“
Boy, you are messed up, aren’t ya?”

“
So?”

“
So, I don’t do high maintenance girls usually,
but—”

Scoffing
loudly, I shifted my weight and swung my leg over the horse. “Get
screwed, Eric. I am not high maintenance!”

“
Whoa, whoa, wait a sec.” He grabbed my arm gently and made me
stay on the platform. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt your
feelings.”

I didn’t
respond.

“
Amara?”

“
Just take me home. I’ve had enough,” I said, looking down at
the ground.

“
Aw, kiddo, I’m sorry. Look, you know I want you—so damn bad
I’ve had to class myself as a stalker.” He scratched his brow and
looked up at me. “But...I’m not looking for love,
and...”

I waited for a
few breaths before looking at him. “And?”

“
Well, you’re a virgin, aren’t you?”

“
Yeah. So?”

“
Did David ever—” Eric stopped, cursing when his watch
beeped.

“
What? What’s wrong?”

He silenced
the alarm. “I gotta go eat before we leave. Okay?”

“
Okay.”

“
I’ll be back in a sec.”

“
Sure, I’ll just go walk alone, among all the dangerous
predators, and get some candy-floss.”

“
Okay.” He nodded, then disappeared.

I stood with
my arms by my sides, feeling small and out of place among the
crowd.

“
You lost, sweetie?” asked a man on stilts.

“
I’m fine.” I looked up at him—all the way up. “Are you
human?”

His brow
crinkled. “Well, I may be tall, but last I checked—” He felt for a
pulse. “Still beating.”

I cleared my
throat. “Sorry.” That was awkward. I felt his eyes on my back as I
walked toward the scent of vanilla and sugar. The warm pink light
of the candyfloss stand enveloped me, making me feel a little less
out in the open. I placed a coin on the counter, wishing I had two
so I could buy one of those hot cinnamon doughnuts as well, and
said, “One please.”

“
Candyfloss?” As the woman turned around, she stopped dead and
flashed a wicked grin. “Well, hello there.”

Vampire. For sure.
“Uh, yeah,
candyfloss, thanks.”

She went about
twisting it onto a stick, all the while gawking at me like she knew
something I didn’t. Each vertebrae in my spine lengthened, as if
being taller might make me feel less alone—less awkward.

A group of
teens dressed all Emo passed and laughed at me, whispering as they
did; the way they moved, the way they glided over the dry, sandy
carnival floor, made my skin inch up my arms.

“’
Ere ya go, luv.” The lady handed me the floss, checking her
watch as our fingers touched.

“
Thanks.” I smiled politely, backing away, without taking my
eyes off her. The rides seemed louder then, the lights dimmer and
the tents taller, all crowding around me like eerie Ents, waiting
for me to trip on a branch so they could grab me with hands like
claws and drag me into empty tunnels where they’d...

I shook off
those images and looked around frantically for any sign of Eric. I
didn’t want the candyfloss anymore and only held it as a prop so
I’d look less lost and alone.

But I was lost
and alone. How did I even know Eric would come back for me? How did
I even know he wasn’t stalking me—waiting to attack me?

The human on
stilts appeared a few tents over, his spotty shirt making me relax.
At least there was one person I was sure wouldn’t eat me if given
the chance. I picked up a quick step and darted out into a crowd of
teens to get to him, smacking straight in to the firm, almost
rubbery chest of a man.

“
Oh, God,” I said, peeling sticky pink candyfloss off my arm.
“I’m such a klutz.”

But he said
nothing in return, staying completely silent until I looked up at
him and froze—an entire lifetime of heartbeats giving up in one
breath.

“
Ara?”

“
Jason.”

The candyfloss
fell to the floor, the sound around me rushing into my ears like a
horn in a tunnel. Each reaction happened in my mind, but came too
slowly from my body. I wasn’t running. Why wasn’t I running?

“
Ara. I’m not going to hurt you. I’m here for Karnivale,”
Jason stated, taking a step away from me, his brow knitting
together tightly in the middle. “Why…” he shook his head, “why
are
you
here?”

“
I’m here for Karnivale, too.” My voice shook.

“
Ara, do you know what Karnivale is?”

“
Yes. Well, I mean, no—but.”

“
Who brought you here? Surely you’re not here with David?” he
asked with a hint of uncertainty.

“
No.” I shifted my feet out of the running-madly-away
screaming position. “Why? Have you seen him?”

“
No.” He stared at me, his lip lifting slightly over his
teeth.

“
I have to go.” I turned on my heel.

“
Wait!” He grabbed my arm; I clutched a hand over his, closing
my eyes into thin slits.

Don’t hurt
me!

“
I—” He released his grip. “I’m not going to hurt
you.”

My eyes opened
slowly again to the face of concern.

“
Just tell me. Who are you here with?” Jason looked around,
probably wondering where my escort was; a very good question. “Is
it a vam—?”

“
Yes. He’s a vampire.”

“
And you knew he was a vampire when you came here?”

“
Yes. Why?”

“
Did he tell you what Karnivale is?” his voice sounded
strained, hurried.

“
Not really. He said it’s a fun thing for vampires—an annual
gathering.”

“
Ara, it’s a buffet.” He looked at his watch. “You have about
five minutes before midnight, and then—” his voice trailed off, his
hand slightly extended toward me.

“
He didn’t tell me that.” I swallowed and took a step back,
looking around at the other humans. I have to warn them.

“
No!” Jason extended his hand further, laughing nervously.
“Don’t do that. You’ll be killed instantly.”

“
But—”

“
Ara, you have to go,” he stated, becoming taller. “If David
knew you w—”

“
If he knew what, Jason? If he knew what? He doesn’t care. He
left.” I leaned forward, raising my voice. “He doesn’t care what
happens to me. And what’s it to you, anyway? You tried to wipe me
from the face of the Earth. Now you get your chance, don’t
you?”

“
Ara, please?” His shoulders became tight and high. “You have
to go. Now.”

“
I’ll go when I’m ready.” I folded my arms.

“
God, you’re so stubborn.” Jason reached for me; I squealed as
he grabbed my arm.

“
Problem?” My vampire escort finally appeared, sipping an
ice-soda through a smile.

“
You
?” Jason said through his
teeth.

“
What’s up, man.” Eric gently pressed two fingertips to
Jason’s wrist, pushing his hand off my arm.

“
Why did you bring her here?” Jason pointed directly at him,
his hand almost swearing pain of death. I felt so short standing
between them.

“
She’s fine,” Eric said, sipping his drink again. “I’ll get
her out of here before midnight.”

“
She’s not yours to take risks with, De la Rose.”

“
Cool it, Knight,” Eric said with same spite. “She’s
not
your
problem
either.”

Jason’s jaw
tightened, his eyes narrowing, awakening the monster I knew too
well. A split second passed; he shuffled his feet, clenching his
fist before it shot out like lightning. I didn’t see anything,
nothing at all except the tent collapse behind Eric and the
ice-soda fall to the sand in a splash of red, marking my shoes and
jeans with a frosty cool.

“
Why did you do that?” I screeched.

“
That guy pisses me off.” Jason grabbed my arm and started
walking, dragging me like a naughty child beside him.

“
Where are you taking me?”

“
I—” His words ended on the wave of high-pitched screams that
filled Karnivale then, coming to gurgled ends in tents all around
us as the lights went out, flooding the fair with pitch-black
fear.

“
What is that?” I said into the sudden darkness, hoping Jason
was still there.

“
That’s...the buffet.” He twisted his wrist to pull me closer,
shielding me in his long, hard arms.

“
Buffet?”

The silence
under the screams spread like ashes over the night, and dying
carnival light flickered shadows onto the grounds around us,
showing shifting figures with each flash. My head whipped to the
left, a fraction after Jason’s. He stood taller, enveloping me like
a mother swan wraps her young. “I have to get you out of here.”

“
No!” I struggled against his hold. “No. Let me go.”
Please don’t hurt me. I can’t go through that
again.

“
Relax, Ara,” he said, his breath warm on the crown of my
head. “I promise, no harm will come to you. Please, we have to
leave before this gets bad.”

“
Bad? It’s already bad. People are dying, Jason.” I gasped as
his name slipped from my mouth.

He let go of
me and smiled, but dropped it quickly when he looked behind me,
waving a hand past my head; I ducked, confused as hell that the
popcorn stand behind me burst into a spread of glass and corn all
over the ground.

“
Stay back, Meredith. This one’s mine,” Jason
ordered.

“
I’ll fight you for it.” She jumped to her feet, dusting off
popcorn, her snarling face barely recognisable as the candyfloss
woman.

Jason merely
gave an arched brow. The woman backed off, melting into the shadows
until she turned and bolted away.

We both looked
up then as, everywhere, the sound of tearing flesh and
blood-curdling cries overtook—the same screams I heard every night
in my sleep, over and over again, after I survived Jason’s
attack.

Tears spilled
like warm water over my cheeks, coming so easily under the fear
that shook my body. I just couldn’t go through that again. I’d die.
I’d die if ever I had to even imagine it.

Jason’s eyes
held the softness that confused me the night he tried to kill me.
“Ara?”

“
I just wanna go home.”

“
Shh,” he said, and cradled a very willing me into his chest.
“I’ve got you.”

He placed a
wide palm over my face, blocking my ears, and I felt safe.
Strangely safe. The only sound remaining under his hold was the
whispering wind and the beating of my own heart, like a soundtrack
playing through headphones in my ears. I breathed against his black
cotton shirt and relaxed, waiting for the end.

“
You’re okay now.” He stepped away from me.

I kept my eyes
closed, reaching for the safety of his arms until I felt a cool
breeze. Everything was so dark and quiet, but the familiar smell of
moss and rainwater sprinklers made me look at my surroundings.