The Kiss Off (26 page)

“Drewster!” I said when he answered his cell.

“Oh my God, do my ears deceive me?” Drew said. “It’s not the infamous Poppy Douglas, is it?” Maybe this was a bad idea.

“What are you talking about infamous?”

“Infamous in an awesome way. Are you out of isolation now?”

“Not exactly. Probation starts tomorrow but the wardens are out and I hear you’re having a thing.”

“Yeah! Come over, it’s just a couple of people. I’d be happy to harbor a fugitive.”

I stole Rory’s bike from the garage and after a bit of a wobbly start, I rode like an X Gamer the couple of blocks over to Drew’s place. Okay, so maybe I was less ‘X Gamer’, more ‘recent tricycle graduate’ but it doesn’t matter, I got there. I felt the evening air washing over me as I rode, and took deep luxurious breaths, sucking it in deep down into my lungs. Wow it had been awhile since I’d breathed anything but lavender air freshener as I stayed cooped up and out of sight of the windows.

There were a couple of cars outside Drew’s place and I wheeled the bike down the driveway, dumping it in a bush beside the porch, hoping it was somehow concealed. Rory was in love with this bike. Not that he used it much, but when he did bring it out, his crew made
ooh
and
aah
noises and wanted to have a go, even though they’d ridden over to our place on their own bikes. It had been his Christmas and birthday present combined last year and I get the impression it’s a pretty high-end machine. All I know is the pedals move the wheels and the brakes make them stop, which is good enough for me. When it comes to my dream car however, it’s going to be a whole other story. Something with a top I can put down, for driving around with my girls in the sunshine and the wind tousling our hair. I really must get that car fund up and running again, but on the measly allowance Mom and Dad give me? There was never anything left for buying one’s independence.

I pulled a few bushy branches over the bike to give it some cover, looked around and found no one. It was hidden and no one had seen me do it.

“Poppy?”

I screamed and looked above me and there, sitting on the cement siding of the porch with a bemused smile, was Cam.

***

Chapter Twenty

“Jeez!” I said, pressing my hand against the side of the house for support as I waited for my heart to climb back into my chest and calm down a bit.

“What are you doing skulking down in the bushes?” Cam said.

So maybe I wasn’t as stealthy as I thought. “I’m not skulking…what are
you
doing sitting in the dark all by yourself?”

“Nothing.”

“Exactly,” I said. “Me too. I’m doing nothing.” I walked around the porch, up the steps and stopped in front of him. He hadn’t moved, he was just sitting there, watching me. I crossed my arms against my chest and watched him back. Were we in a staring competition? Is that what was going on? It appeared not (or I won), as Cam broke eye contact for a moment, looking out at the quiet tree-lined street.

“I thought you were grounded.”

“I was,” I said. “Still am, actually. I’m on day release.”

“Your parents have no idea you’re even gone, do they.”

“Maybe,” I said. He grinned at me. I felt the full wattage of that grin, it blasted the night time shadows away from me and my whole body relaxed, like just from seeing that smile, it knew that everything was going to be okay. But then I snapped back to attention.
Whoa
. I mentally gave myself a shake, reminding my body that we weren’t together, we were barely even friends and it had no right to feel that comforted around him. Where had that rush of feeling even come from, anyway? I hadn’t been comfortable around him in forever. I’d been distinctly uncomfortable around him, actually. Had my body reacted that way around Ty? Had I ever felt completely comfortable around him? No. Maybe. Sometimes, I don’t know, but that was different.

“It’s good to see you,” he said.

I nodded. And my head kept nodding like a bobble-head doll and I couldn’t stop it so I turned away from him, turned toward the door and pulled it open, giving my head a good shake to get back in control.

“Where are you going?” he said, standing up, as if to follow after me.

I looked through the open door, warm yellow light spilled outside, converting me from blacks and greys to technicolour. I could see down the hallway straight through to the living room, where the TV was on, and laughter and conversation echoed down the shiny floorboards toward us. Our friends were in there, in the light, just out-of-sight; probably everyone was chilling on the couch.

“I’m going inside,” I said, nodding pointedly at the open door, and the fact that I had one foot over the threshold. I seemed to want to make him feel stupid, to stop him being nice to me. But wasn’t this what I had been wanting this whole time? I wanted things to be better between us, right? I wanted Cam back, we were never supposed to have broken up. But did I still-?

“Oh,” Cam said, his amusement gone. He sat back down on the ledge. He wasn’t following me into the light.

“Okay,” I said. “See ya.” I walked into the house and the wire door swung shut with a bang behind me. I didn’t turn and look, though my ears strained, listening. But there was no movement. He wasn’t coming. I rounded the doorway into the living room and found a mound of people jammed in together on the couch. Ravi was lying on top of everyone (surprise surprise), reaching over to a bowl of Doritos on the end table, grinning as he flailed his arms and legs, giggling as he bumped and knocked into people making them grunt and groan. No one was actually watching the TV, it was just playing MTV in the background.

“Oh my God, Poppy, hi!” a girl said from behind me. It was the girl with the red hair from the student announcements (I really needed to learn her name). Only she didn’t have red hair anymore, it was short and black and she had a fringe that swept over half her face. “I’m so glad you’re here, listen we’d really love to interview you on the announcements show. What do you say to being on Monday’s announcements?” No. No with every fiber of my being no. Luckily I didn’t have to answer as her sudden outburst caught everyone’s attention and Ravi forgot the Dorito bowl, which was a mere inch from his fingertips. Drew, in the middle of the couch took the opportunity to shove Ravi off everyone and he disappeared with a thump behind the coffee table.

“Hi Poppy.”

“Hey.”

“How are you?”

I was inundated with greetings. The student announcements girl gave me a wide smile. Wow she had a big mouth. “I didn’t know you were coming, I’m so glad you made it,” she said. She pulled me into a hug and then smiled at me some more. Everyone got up to say hello. I knew these kids, sure, we went to school together, we knew some of the same people, but I wasn’t friends with any of them except for Drew and Ravi. It was disappointing that Mads and Vanya weren’t here, not even Dev seemed to be around. Regardless that I didn’t really know them, they all acted like I was a long-lost BFF, giving me hugs and smiling and asking how I was, like they were really, really interested.

“I saw your new video, that song is completely kick-ass,” a girl said and then she started singing the chorus at me:

I don’t date hateful scum

I never thought you were the one

Can I just simply say we’re done

Don’t call me no more

Fuck-you!

“Pretty ballsy though, huh?” Ravi said.

I smiled, embarrassed and when he hugged me, I hugged him right back.

“I can’t believe Ty is such a dirt bag.”

“But a totally
hot
dirt bag.”

“Who did he cheat on you with? Was it complete randoms or-?”

“It was Roxy Washington, wasn’t it.”

“Is he a good kisser? Tell me he’s a good kisser, he looks like he’d be awesome.”

“Is he as sweet as he seems to be?”

“Are you going to go back to him?”

“Have you talked to him lately?”

“So where are they playing next?”

“I know it might be weird, but do you think you could get me their autographs?”

“Can you get people into their concerts? I bet they do a wicked live show.”

I didn’t answer anyone, just forced a smile and listened. Questions, comments, so many questions. So many
personal
questions. It was like a flashback to the day I opened the door to those reporters. So many reporters talking over the top of each other. What was it about a little bit of celebrity that made people think they could pry like this? This was my personal life, it wasn’t like I was going to ask them, these acquaintances or whatever they were, whether or not they had slept with their boyfriends or girlfriends yet. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to come here. I started breathing hard, the claustrophobia of the crowd as they inched closer with interest and curiosity.

“Hey Poppy,” Cam squeezed my hand. I don’t know when he had come in, but he was there. He had followed me in and muscled his way beside me and taken my hand in his.

“You want to come outside for a bit?”

“Yes please,” I said and scurried out of the room. I followed him out into the backyard. They were smart enough not to follow. I didn’t have to guess at what they were talking about now I was gone.

Still me.

It was dark except for the pool lights illuminating the water, giving everything a blue, unearthly tinge. I closed the door behind me and turned my back to the windows, my back to all those prying eyes. I let out a breath.

“You okay?” he said. I took a couple more deep, steadying breaths and sat down beside the pool. Cam kicked off his flip flops and rolled up his jeans, dangling his feet in the water.

“Yeah,” I replied. “Sort of. It’s fine.” I pulled off my sneakers and followed suit. I kicked my legs gently, focusing on the movement of the cool water.

“Must be weird,” he said. He could have meant any number of things.

“Mmm,” I said. He was right though, it was all weird. Sitting there alone with Cam was weird. I hadn’t done it in so long, I didn’t know what to do, how to act.

“So um, are you looking forward to school starting?” I said.

He gave me a funny side-glance and raised his eyebrows, like he hadn’t even thought about it. “I guess.”

“Me too,” I nodded. “I’m looking forward to going back.”

“Cool.”

“I mean, then I’ll be able to get out of the house sometimes, you know?”

“Yeah.”

“But it’s going to be different, isn’t it?” I said.

“Different?”

“Yeah like…weird.”

“Oh, like in there?” he nodded behind us and we both peered around. I heard a girl squeal and her head ducked out of view and they all went silent inside for a couple of seconds before shushed giggling travelled out to us through the open window.

“Yeah, it probably is,” he said.

“I don’t know why everyone thinks this is so interesting. Why
I’m
so interesting.”

“That’s just it,” Cam said. He looked down at my hand that sat on the edge of the pool between us. “You
are
interesting.” He slowly, deliberately picked up my hand and held it, wrapped his around it. It was warm, firm, a bit rougher than I remembered. But that didn’t matter. His hand was wrapped around mine. I was looking at our hands, and I knew, I could just tell he was staring at my face, waiting for some kind of reaction. Some kind of signal to tell him he’d gone too far.

“You’re pretty interesting too,” I said. Or not far enough. I entwined my fingers with his, my eyes locked on them, at my lighter skin tone from all my time indoors against his sun-bronzed fingers with bits of dirt and engine grime smudged into creases and under his nails. He’d scrubbed them clean, I knew he would have but his hands had always looked like that when he’d been working on his car a lot, and since he was a single man again he probably had lots of time on his hands and a junkyard heap still sitting in the garage to be repaired. Maybe he wouldn’t have so much time on his hands anymore. Maybe he’d have me.

But this couldn’t really be happening. I’d been hoping it would for months, could it be true? Did he really want me? Was this really real? I couldn’t make myself believe it. I didn’t have to ask because my eyes moved from our hands when I felt his other against my cheek. I looked into his eyes and he was looking right back. He tucked a stray hair out of my face and stroked my cheek with his thumb. I leaned in toward the hand. He leaned his body toward me. This was really happening. I closed my eyes and leaned toward him.

Someone inside screamed. A couple more hollers of excitement. We jerked back from each other.

“Poppy!”

I didn’t even notice it happen but our hands were separated again, the foot of space between us felt like a mile.

“Oh my God, Poppy get in here!” someone shouted. Cam and I twisted behind us to look at the house. Through the window, we could see most of them were standing, their backs to us, light from the TV flickering over their features. They hadn’t caught Cam and me about to get back together, they hadn’t shrieked in horror or amazement or whatever those screams and hollers were about, it hadn’t been about us. Something else had caught their attention.