The Lariat (Finding Justus Series) (16 page)

22

“We haven’t seen him or heard from him for the rest of the night. That shield you put up held until the moment you and Orrin jumped.”

My father told me about how they flung themselves down the steps and into the night, madly charging the group of angels surrounding Samael. He disappeared leaving all of them to dance solitary circles in the black mist.

My mother was there. She had come for me. Apparently she had been waiting the entire time, only allowed to materialize when the threat was imminent. And as soon as I left, the threat was now upon the five people I left behind.

I kind of wished I had stayed for the fight. I missed the opportunity to see my mother, but if I had stayed Samael would surely have done something. He was about to ask for my help- he was in the middle of the phrase.

I need your hel…
was all I heard, and then Orrin rescued me. He stole me away from a life of dark, bloody servitude that made me shudder.

Did I really make a mistake by going outside? It felt so right. So instinctual.

I sat in the large chair, the only other piece of furniture in Orrin’s room, watching him dress. The dawn faintly seeped through the thin bedroom curtain. We slept an hour before my father’s call woke us. The phone was pressed to my ear but I wasn’t listening too much of what my father was saying. I should have given him my full attention, given the severity of the situation. We had been attacked. I narrowly escaped with my free will. I had stepped outside our Sanctuary and goaded Samael into showing himself. I knew I had it coming, but I just couldn’t listen to anything my father was preaching.

There was a gorgeous man sliding his ragged jeans up his long lean legs. His back was to me and my eyes caught every inch of skin there was to be seen. His inky black tattoo glinted in the early morning light, the black tendrils that marked him as the son of Orias. His darkness called to me like a silent siren’s song that only my soul could hear.

Orrin turned at my loud audible sigh and noticed me staring him down. He was still wonderfully shirtless. I wanted to drag my tongue across the sleek muscles of his chest and he knew it. Smiling, he prowled across the room to where I was sitting. He trapped me with his arms on both sides of the chair and brought himself closer to my face. Rather than meet his lips I kissed the skin on his chest and worked my way up. Now it was his turn to sigh loudly.

“Layla,” Came a voice very far away, “
Layla?”

“Yes, Dad. Sorry. I dropped the phone,” I didn’t even make an attempt at composure, but I did push Orrin away. “What did you say?”

“I asked when you thought you’d be coming back. Cyrus says you still need to finish your thesis. He also thinks it would be better to confront Samael here. Staying on Neutral territory will only put off the inevitable.”

“Well, if that’s what Cyrus says,” Orrin whispered.

I swatted him away and sobered, “He’s right about the thesis, I guess.”

“Did you call in to work again?”

“Actually, I took care of that yesterday. I told the manager at the Coffee Shack, David is his name, that I wouldn’t be coming back. Actually I blamed it on you, since I don’t have a sick grandmother or anything.”

“What did you say?”

“I told him that you were in town and we had some
major
family issues to work out. And between that and graduation, I didn’t think I would be able to finish out the semester. David was okay with it. After all, I’ve been working there for over two years. He seemed to be understanding.”

“College kids come and go in his business. I’m sure he’s used to it,” he added.

“So, I’m replaceable?”

“To him, sure. To me, no. I care about you- not some job. They’re a dime-a-dozen. You’re not. And we need to focus on the problem at hand. And another thing, I’m really kind of surprised you let your thesis go unfinished for this long.” I had so many loose ends hanging over my head and my father had already taken notice.

Orrin looked at me one last time before he walked out the bedroom door and into another part of the house. He was giving me the illusion of privacy, but he could still hear every word of our conversation, which is why my stomach knotted when my dad handed the phone over to Cyrus.

“Good morning,” Cyrus’ smooth baritone voice made the knots turn to flutters even through the phone.

“Hi,” was all I could manage.

“You two have done it again, it seems.” He was abrupt, hurt no doubt, and justified in his feelings.

I wasn’t sure I knew what he was referring to- jumping with Orrin to places unknown, or spending the night with Orrin when I should have done so with him. Deep down I knew he was referring to both.

“When should we expect you back?” he continued curtly.

“I don’t know. I haven’t talked to Orrin…”

“I don’t give a damn about him,” he interrupted angrily, “Nor do I care for his thoughts on the subject. I asked when you would be back.”

I inhaled and shut my eyes to his scalding tone, holding back my biting reply. He was more than mad, that in itself made me want to stay away. At this point I would rather face Samael than my angry angel.

Words failed me. My mouth hung open like a little child. What could I say? I was guilty of it all.

I wanted to scream.
I am tired of everyone in my life making me feel inferior.

“Then maybe you should quit acting like a child and start taking responsibility for the situation.”

“What? Why…” Surely he couldn’t.

“I can still hear what you’re thinking. Especially when you scream them at me like that. I’m not in the church right now. James and I are at my office at Trinity. I can hear those thoughts of yours even through the phone.”

“Everyone is overreacting, don’t you think?”

“Not particularly.”

“Look, I don’t know how to stop screwing up. Let me break it down for you- I know how to take care of myself. I know how to take care of others. It’s what I do. I know all of you think you know what’s best, but why can’t you all just stop and listen to me. Why can’t you trust me for a change when I say this is a fight I will have to face on my own? Why won’t ya’ll trust my instincts?”

Cyrus was silent while I continued, “When I fought Lillith my instincts just took over, and I knew exactly how to stop her. When Orrin and I chased after Daisy into Lillith’s lair, something within me knew just what to touch, I brought her back- I brought them both back. Anytime a daemon, human, or angel has come to me needing help, I have known exactly how to do it. I’m the Beacon- it’s what I do. Why do you think this problem with Samael will be any different?”

“What makes you think it will be the same?”

He had me there, “I don’t know. But odds are…”

“That’s arrogance, Layla,” he interrupted.

“Now you think about this,” Cyrus countered, “It is just like you said, you always know how to help people. You helped Orrin, you saved Daisy and anytime some sad creature comes seeking you out. That’s why you were always able to resist Lillith- I don’t think she ever figured out that she needed to
ask
you- not demand or persuade. Just ask. She never used the correct words, which is why you are able to continue to refuse her.”

I thought about it. “Who’s to say it would even work. I don’t think my Beacon powers could be used to hurt someone. That seems awful simplistic.”

“Sometimes it is the simplest answer that is the best.”

Silence.

“Layla, I do not want to make you feel inferior. I love you. And if it is patronizing to say this, then I am sorry, but you must understand there is still much about this world and the others that you have yet to learn. I saw your face when you cast that force field around the church. It was amazing and frightening. I’ve never been that scared in all my life.”

“Yeah?”

“Did you even know you could do that?”

“No,” I smiled, “That was pretty cool. It kept ya’ll from killing yourselves.”

And with those words, clarity, like a brick, building hit me, shattering everything I knew about my birthright. My mind was lost in crumbled images slipping through the cracks and splashing into an oblivion. My thoughts weren’t making sense, but it had something to do with my birthright. The swirling current of water was impossible to see through, the pieces vanishing into the inky depths of my mind. My heart was racing and my daemon was urging me on as if it too knew something I couldn’t reach.

I had been silent for too long when Cyrus said, “Layla? We all really think it would best if you come back to San Antonio. Providence is a safe place, but staying there is only putting off the inevitable. We have all considered it, and from what we know of him, Samael never
ever
comes up from Hell. He always rules from below. For him to show up like this is just exceptional.”

“I just…I just don’t know,” I shook my head, “What did you say?”

“Are you even listening to me? I said if it makes a difference, I want you here too. I need to know you are safe.”

Words, words, words.
I couldn’t handle any more words right then. I needed to figure out what was happening inside my mind and my soul. A chasm had opened up within me and I didn’t know whether to fall or dive head-first.

“I can’t talk right now, Cyrus. There’s something I need to figure out.” I hung up the phone while he was still protesting. He probably thought I was talking about us, but there was something much bigger that my mind was trying to process.

“
Orrin,”
I ran down the stairs breaking the beautiful antique bannister as I slung myself around a corner. He caught my shoulders, confused by my out of breath laughter and sudden blissful mood.

He looked at my wide crazy smile, “Talking to him makes you that happy, huh?”

I rolled my eyes knowing he hated it, “I need you to hit me.”

“What?” He laughed.

“Better yet,” I zoomed around him to the kitchen and came back with a large knife.

“No.”

“Yes,” I demanded eagerly. “Come outside with me.”

The yard looked neglected, a little drier, browner. But the rope swing was still there swaying like it had for the past three years. I gave Orrin the knife and his frown deepened.

“Are you going to explain what you are up t0?”

“Cyrus just said something that sparked in my brain. Do you still have those memories of fighting Lillith on the beach?”

He nodded and if it was possible, frowned even harder.

“I didn’t know I could, but I pulled down those golden restraint-thingies from the sky. Mother said I borrowed that power from Heaven-
because
I needed them. And then it happened again a few years ago when we walked into Hell to get Daisy.”

Sadness covered his face at the mention of her name. I began to understand he would always miss her, it didn’t mean he loved me any less. “Somehow I just
knew
exactly what to do to free her from that solid glass she seemed suspended in. You warned me not to touch it. I remember that vividly. That dark glass was everywhere around us and you said not to touch it. But it didn’t hurt me when I touched it. Like maybe the rules don’t apply to me.”

He laughed deeply. His whole body shook, “Wow, and you say I’m arrogant. Damn, Layla. But you are right. I remember it only dug into your skin when you tried to slam your fist into it. But when you reached in- nothing. It was like you were sliding your hand into water.” His eyes moved far away, remembering back as he looked on powerless. He was so terrified he was going to lose both Daisy and me that day. “Don’t let me stop you. Keep going.”

“When I missed you to the point of self-destruction, when I felt it was my life slipping through my fingers Cyrus came, and you too. And there was that force field. How the hell did I know how to do that?”

He shrugged, “Sometimes it’s easier to accept abilities than question their origins.”

“But I’ve never been able to pull powers from Heaven down since. I’ve tried.”

He seemed amused, “You’ve tried?”

“Maybe,” I hedged. “But I’m not rehashing all this to amuse you. Keep up.”

He nodded, his cute frown firmly back in place.

“I’m beginning to think that when there is something I need, when it is crucial to me helping someone. Maybe it’s more than just my instincts. Maybe it’s me. Maybe along with my fire, my healing and my wings, there are other parts of me that I’m not even aware of.”

“That is not news, Layla. That is how a birthright works. I am missing the dilemma.”

“It’s more than that. It feels different. I feel like I’m different. Like I’m just waking up from something. There’s power all around me, but I can’t reach it yet. Not until…not ‘til it’s time, maybe.”

He watched me though hooded eyes, thinking upon my confusing words, “So you think that your powers can grow or change based upon your needs within a situation?”

“
Crazy, right?
” I exhaled loudly, “But that’s it exactly.”