The Lonely Heart (14 page)

When his mother had died, not much had changed for Josh. At least, not at first. Then Isaiah had swooped in, the big brother he had dreamt of meeting for so long. It had been everything he’d hoped for and more. His whole life had got turned upside down and it was great. Well, not his mom dying, but really, it was hard to be all that upset about someone he’d only seen, like, three times. But then Isaiah had brought him here, and Josh had met Grady, and he’d thought…

Well, it didn’t really matter what he thought anymore, did it? Grady had been weird lately and Isaiah had been snappy and now they weren’t talking or looking at each other or even sharing space. One would come in the room and the other would leave.

Josh’s stomach rumbled and he patted it, telling it to hush. Dinner used to be something to look forward to, Grady and Isaiah swapping jokes and smiles, teasing him and each other.

But the last two nights Grady would put the food out and disappear. Isaiah would shovel his own meal down, silent and…Josh had finally broken down yesterday and asked if Isaiah was angry at him. Isaiah just shook his head and told him to eat his food—that it wasn’t anything to worry about.

But Josh
was
worried. He’d been building a perfect little life here and now it was getting all screwed up. He knew it had something to do with that lady at the feed store. He understood that she was angry at Isaiah because he didn’t like girls. Isaiah had explained all www.total-e-bound.com

THE LONELY HEART K.M. Mahoney 89

about it. Josh really couldn’t see why his brother’s dating habits mattered to some strange lady that he’d never met.

Josh jerked his head up when the screen door slammed. Grady came stomping down the front steps of the house, hands shoved deep in his pockets, eyes glued to the dirt. He looked sad.

Josh lifted his hand to wave, then paused mid-motion. Grady was dragging his feet, walking to his truck, but it was the expression on his face that stopped Josh from hailing him.

He looked kind of how Josh felt before school on test days. Like he was going to have to do something that he really didn’t want to do.

Josh hunkered down as best he could without moving, watching as Grady climbed into his truck. Then the big rancher just sat there for a minute—hands on the wheel, staring at nothing. Even from here, Josh could see him heave a sigh before the engine roared to life.

The truck pulled away, leaving a thick cloud of dust hanging in the air. Josh chewed on his thumbnail and thought hard, studying the trail left behind by Grady’s departure.

Wherever Grady was going, Josh could tell he hadn’t wanted to. Josh would go get Tommy—he would be the most likely to listen, to help—but Tommy was a couple of miles out doing…something. Josh still didn’t understand what exactly the cowboys did all day, when they rode out into the tree-covered wilderness and wandered the miles of grassy plains.

It took Josh nearly five minutes, but he finally reached a conclusion. This had gone on long enough. Grady wasn’t happy and needed someone to help him. Isaiah wasn’t happy and needed to get the stick out of his butt. They were both being stupid.

So it was, apparently, up to Josh to fix things. This was his family, Grady and Isaiah and the guys, and he was going to fight for it. He’d never had a family before. His mother didn’t count. She’d always been distant and far more concerned with her life than with him. But this, here, on the ranch, this was the family he’d always wanted and it was worth fighting for, worth trying to keep in one piece.

Josh hopped off the fence, stumbling a bit when his feet hit the uneven ground. He took a few steps, backtracked and snatched up his backpack, then took off, slinging the bag over his shoulder. Around this time of day, Isaiah was usually in one of the two breeding barns, brushing out one of his beloved mares.

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He tramped past the bright red main barn, the low sounds of whickering floating out from the horses not being used today. Small paddocks butted up to each stall, with doors leading out to give the animals fresh air and more room. He circled around the side, patting a few big heads as he passed. Then it was down the hill and up to the first of the two smaller barns, nestled in a little dip side-by-side.

“That’s a girl, so lovely, yes.” The sound of his brother’s voice from inside told Josh he’d guessed correctly. He dumped his bag at the door and entered carefully, giving his eyes a few moments to adjust to the dim light.

Isaiah was at the end of the long, wide centre aisle, grooming a pretty little bay mare.

“Hey, kiddo,” Isaiah called, quietly so as not to startle the obviously skittish horse.

“Good day at school?”

Josh shrugged, stopping near the mare’s—Ashley’s—head and stroked her flank.

“Need something?” Isaiah asked absently. He rubbed the currycomb along Ashley’s hindquarters, glancing up over her back to meet Josh’s stare.

Josh nodded. Isaiah paused in his motions, cocking his head expectantly.

It was times like these that Josh felt his lack keenly. If he could
tell
Isaiah, let his tone of voice convey his worry…but it wasn’t possible and Josh had long ago accepted that. It was what it was.

“Grady went to town,”
he signed.

“So?”

“You need to go get him.”

“Grady’s a big boy, he can handle himself.” Isaiah’s tone was cranky, the words final, and he went back to his work like Josh hadn’t spoken.

Josh wanted to throw back his head and scream. Loudly. But that wasn’t fair to Ashley.

She’d freak and it wasn’t her fault that Josh’s brother was being a big doofus.

“I think he needs help.”

It took Josh waving wildly to get Isaiah’s attention. Isaiah sighed.

“Josh, I know you like Grady, but what he does in his free time is really none of our business. Now, why don’t you go up to the house and get a snack? I’ll be up soon.”

Josh shook his head violently and stamped his foot
. “I mean it. Grady needs help. You need
to go find him.”

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Isaiah sighed again and rested his arms on top of Ashley’s back, brush dangling. “All right, I can see you aren’t gonna let this go. What makes you say he needs help?”

“He didn’t want to go. He looked upset and people in town are being mean right now and—”

Isaiah cut off Josh’s frantic motions with a quick wave of his brush. “Josh—”

“Don’t.”
Josh put all the disgust he was feeling into the abrupt movements of his signing. Disappointment churned in his stomach. He glared fiercely at his brother, equal parts furious at Isaiah and at himself for the tears he felt burning in his eyes. He couldn’t really explain why he was so upset, why he
knew
it was important for Isaiah to go after Grady. He just
did
.

But, like so many times before, he couldn’t figure out how to make his feelings clear.

Josh sniffed and turned to leave.

“Josh.”

Josh paused but didn’t turn, not willing to look at his brother and risk looking like a big baby when he started to cry.

“It’s really that important to you?” Isaiah asked quietly.

Josh nodded.
“He needs to be here for dinner,”
he half-turned to tell Isaiah.
“He hasn’t been
in days and I want him here. Like a family again.”

A long pause dragged through the barn, interspersed by shifting bodies and low snorts from the other horses in the stalls, the sounds familiar and normally, comforting. Finally, boots scraped on concrete then two big hands settled on his shoulders.

“All right,” Isaiah conceded. “I’ll go find Grady.”

Josh turned and flung himself at his brother, wrapping his arms around Isaiah’s waist and squeezing with all his might. Isaiah chuckled.

“Little brat.”

One of these days Isaiah was going to have to learn to say no to Josh. Otherwise, the kid was going to work him over good, especially once they hit those teenage years. But, as always, Josh put on that miserable face and sort of hunched into himself and Isaiah caved.

Which was how he found himself parking his truck on Main Street, pissed off and annoyed, but resolved to track down his boss. Who probably didn’t want to be tracked down—they would have another argument and… He slammed the truck door and stomped www.total-e-bound.com

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across the parking lot, not sure if he was more angry or frustrated. Whatever he was, the maelstrom of emotions was making his gut churn.

Isaiah’s deep scowl made more than one person move swiftly out of his way. He shoved open the door to D’Arcy’s, scowling fiercely at the smoky interior. Dim lights only enhanced the haze hovering over the crowd of cowboys, farmers and assorted patrons all busy celebrating Friday night.

The door smacked him in the butt, knocking him off-balance and sending him staggering across the floor where he nearly took out a huge dude in biker leathers. Isaiah decided he’d be better off doing his searching from a corner, not right in front of the door. He stepped to one side, eyes narrowed as he scanned the bar.

“Can I help you with something, handsome?”

Isaiah barely spared the lush blonde a second look. “Not tonight, honey. I’m not here to have fun.”

“Didn’t think anyone came in here for any other reason.”

“I’m looking for someone,” Isaiah explained. “Tall, broad-shouldered, dark hair and eyes? Dillon Grady?”

“Oh, Grady.” She sniffed. He couldn’t tell if she didn’t like Grady, or if she’d just got a bit too much smoke up her nose. “He hasn’t been here in a good six, eight months. Smart of him, you ask me.”

Six or…no, it would most likely have been about eight months ago. That was the last time Isaiah had been called down to haul Grady out of jail. His boss had slugged some local cowhand for reasons unknown and ended up cooling his heels in the sheriff’s office for the next four hours until Isaiah could come bail him out.

But if Grady hadn’t been into D’Arcy’s since then, where the hell was he going?

“Thanks, honey,” Isaiah said absently. He thought briefly about fortifying himself with a quick drink, but then decided he didn’t want to waste the time trying to plough his way through the crowd to the bar. Most people would think D’Arcy’s was the only bar in town, instead of one of five. It was by far the most popular, although for the life of him, Isaiah couldn’t see why. He far preferred a little out-of-the-way place with a room you could actually walk across, a crowd that consisted of at least a few people who didn’t chain-smoke, and music that you could decipher instead of stuff turned up so loud all it did was shake the floor over the roar of the crowd.

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Isaiah beat a hasty retreat—or at least, as hasty as you could get in that place. He burst out onto the street. Once he got a bit of distance from the front door, he inhaled a deep breath of clear air.

The edge was gone off the anger that had sustained him clear to town. He still wasn’t a very happy cowboy, but he wasn’t ready to tear Grady’s head off this time. Irritated, yes.

Punch-first-ask-questions-later mad, no.

He shoved his hands into his pockets and headed down the sidewalk in the direction of the next bar. Now that his ire had cooled, Isaiah could admit that it had been more hurt than anything.
Here I’d thought that having me and Josh would maybe…

The sun was dipping back down behind the low buildings. Isaiah’s stomach growled menacingly, reminding him that he’d been too mad to eat. He’d left the boys in charge of Josh. They’d probably end up microwaving hotdogs or something for dinner, but Isaiah figured it wouldn’t hurt this once. He’d never cared about eating healthy until Josh came around. Now the thought of some of the crap he and the boys used to scarf down made him nauseous. Life was funny sometimes—funny strange, not funny ha-ha. Though with Tommy around, it was often both. At the same time.

Twenty minutes later, Isaiah stepped inside the third bar on his list. His earlier irritation was starting to rear up again, anger right on its heels. If he didn’t find Grady soon, his stomach was going to gnaw its way free in search of food. Isaiah had far better things to do than tramp all over Edmonton looking for his wayward boss, but damned if he wanted to explain to Josh why Grady wasn’t there to watch cartoons with him tonight, as they’d been in the habit of doing on weekends. Grady could play the jerk all he wanted to Isaiah, but Isaiah sure as hell wasn’t going to let Grady disappoint Josh.

Isaiah finally got lucky. In the last bar he tried. Figured.

“Yeah, Grady was here earlier. Had a beer then headed for the back. Probably went out to have a smoke.”

Grady didn’t smoke, but Isaiah didn’t bother taking the time to explain that to the bored bartender. Boots ringing on the scarred wooden floor, Isaiah headed to the back of the small building. He followed the small hallway past the restrooms and to the back door, propped open to air the close confines out a bit. Isaiah pushed the door open and stepped outside.

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Right into a flying fist. The punch caught him in the jaw and Isaiah stumbled backward, ears ringing. A roar filled his ears and he shook his head to clear it.

Isaiah looked up and got a good look at the action. Oh, hell no. That was just not fair.

His anger burst free again, although this time it had a new target. Namely, the three guys pinning Grady against a wall. Grady was giving it his best, but his nose was bleeding and he was hunched a bit over his stomach.

Isaiah stalked up behind the nearest man and tapped him on the shoulder.