The Makeover (28 page)

“Of
course!  I have class but I can skip one for this.  What time is good
for you and which apartment is it?”

Cara was
already writing her phone numbers and apartment number on a napkin.  She
handed it to Phoenix.  “Girl, be at my house tomorrow around four and you
will get all the help you need.”

Unable to take
it any longer, Phoenix threw her arms around Cara’s neck.

Phoenix
couldn’t stop smiling as Paulo walked her home.  She was smiling because
of the dark woman who called herself beautiful in the Bible.  She was
smiling because Paulo pointed out that he found dark women, including his own
mother, beautiful.  She was smiling because she had a new friend who would
give her a makeover to help her to
feel
beautiful.  She was smiling
because Paulo said her eyes
were
beautiful.

She was smiling
because she had worked out and would really become beautiful.

She was smiling
because she couldn’t wait for Cedric to find her beautiful and for her to crush
him the way he did her.

And her plan
had already fallen into place before she even known she had one.

Beautiful!

“What are you
thinking about, Hun?” Paulo said, as they reached her stoop.

“Had a great
time.  I love, love, love Cara.  I can’t believe she and I have been
living in the same building for, like, six years.  I found out we even
moved in the same year as each other.  Yet, I’ve never met her. 
Wow.  Everyone was really cool at your study.  You were cool.”

Paulo grinned
as he wiped off the steps and gestured for her to sit, promptly sliding in next
to her, close enough for their shoulders to rub.  “Thanks.  Hey, you
and Cara seemed to be having a really long conversation.”

“Yeah,” Phoenix
sighed.  “God is listening, I’ll admit that.  She is a fashion expert
for big girls and I need help with that as well.  She offered to help
me.”  Glancing at Paulo, then back out onto the darkening street, she
continued.  “How did you guys meet?”

“Her husband
and I met through his coworker who came to see me.  His business partner
came to my church about five years ago.  I had just started the Lord’s
Table and was actively seeking clients.  Anyway, he came to church and had
heard me share my testimony during our evening evangelical service. 
Afterwards, he approached me about becoming a client and—”

“Did you help
him?” Phoenix interrupted.

“Um, I was just
getting to that.  But to answer your question, yes.  He came to see
me the very next day.  We worked together about six months.  He shed
fifty pounds and was able to begin maintaining his weight on his own. 
Although he doesn’t need the counseling and training anymore, he still uses our
gym daily.  Clive is away on business which is why you didn’t meet him
tonight.   Anyway, we became good friends and one day, he invited me
to James and Cara’s dinner party because they were also from our church. 
I met them and we also became good friends.  I’ve been trying to help
James and Cara, but they claim they are too busy to work out,” Paulo finished
with a fond smile, shaking his head.

“I know. 
Cara said as much.  I guess it has to happen when it’s time, right?”

“Yeah, but see,
both Cara and James are thirty-five, and they both have hypertension. 
Cara continues to make fried food every chance she gets and James loves his
pork and red meat.  I just worry for their health.”

Phoenix lifted
her hand, hesitated, before she stroked his arm with a feather-light
touch.  “Don’t you pray for them?”

“Of
course.  I don’t hound them…at least not like how I used to,” Paulo gave
Phoenix a sheepish look, secretly pleased that she had been bold enough to
touch him.  He covered her hand with his.  “I’ve come a long way from
trying to bully people into either Christianity or weight loss.  Now, I
just pray for them and wait on the Lord.”

“I guess you’ve
done your best.  I wish I’d had friends like you.”

“You do,” Paulo
said, placing his arm around Phoenix and kissing her hand.

Phoenix melted
into Paulo’s side…somewhat.  She felt great but she was afraid.  She
was getting used to his hugs, his cuddles, his help, his kindness…his
self
,
very, very quickly.  She didn’t want to get used to something that wasn’t
hers to begin with.

“So Cara is
going to help you with fashion?”  Paulo laughed.  “That girl is
forever trying to give someone a makeover.  Speaking of bullying someone
into accepting their help! It’s hilarious.”

“Well I do need
one,” Phoenix murmured.  “Look at how sloppy I dress.  No matter what
I put on, I always look a hot mess.  I bet she can’t do much with me, as
messed up as I am, but it’s worth a shot.”

“Phoenix, stop
that!” Paulo snapped.  “Seriously.”

“Stop what?”
Phoenix implored, with eyebrows raised.

“Phoenix, if
you want to play dress up with Cara, and enjoy girl things like trading fashion
tips, that’s fine.  But stop putting yourself down!  And stop
thinking that all the work has to be done on your outside.  Remember, the
work has to be done through Jesus Christ in here,” Paulo said, thumping on the
spot over her heart.  “If that is a mess, no matter how you dress it up,
it will only end up looking like a well-dressed mess.”

“Why are you
saying my heart’s a mess?” Phoenix said standing up.

Paulo pulled
her back down.  “Listen I said
if
your heart is a mess, and
secondly, why do I have to constantly keep fighting to keep you next to me,
when I am trying to be next to you?”

“Because you
say stupid things like, ‘stop putting yourself down,’” Phoenix countered,
crossing her arms.

“Because you
say stupid things like, ‘I am ugly’ or ‘I can’t dress’ or ‘I can’t accept love
because my skin is too dark.’”  Paulo rubbed a hand down his face. 
“It’s just getting to be too much.  You
already
are a beautiful woman in your own way.  You are going
to shed these pounds, and you are going to get a makeover.  Fine, there is
nothing wrong with improving your outer appearance.  I just want you to
remember that all of that will mean nothing if you do not get the
real
makeover.”

“Oh yeah? 
And what type of makeover is that, Paulo?” Phoenix sneered.

Paulo stood up,
hating her sneer and returning it with a grimace.  “A makeover of the
heart.  And the only heart…
stylist
—he made finger quotations—I know
that can give you one is Jesus Christ.  See you tomorrow.”

He gave her a
hard kiss on her forehead.

And Phoenix
watched Paulo walk away, wondering why he had gone.

Chapter 17

When
tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by
evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each person is tempted when they are dragged
away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it
gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death (James
1:13-15).

Phoenix tried
not to let it bother her.

So what if he
had acted strange?

She had not
said anything wrong.

But you
couldn’t tell Paulo that.

He had met her
at five with a nod.  They had walked together to the fitness center in
silence.  Well, except for when Paulo asked in a low tone, “Sleep well?”

“Yeah,” Phoenix
answered, giving him a wobbly look and an uncertain smile.

As he had done
the day before, he had prayed for their session, finishing with a pointed,
“God, I ask that you keep Phoenix’s mind on You and not the foolish things of
this world.  I ask You now to lead her to salvation and grant her peace in
who You are, so she can finally have peace about who she is, and who You
created her to be.”

They had done a
cardio routine for a half hour, the bike for ten minutes, and were
supposed
to
do the stair master for ten minutes.  Paulo did not even check on
her when she hurriedly climbed off the stair master after three minutes,
clutching her side.

She could
barely catch her breath when she breathed, “My side hurts.  I need a
break.”

“Just drink
some water and stop complaining.  You’ll be alright,” Paulo snapped, as he
continued to climb his own machine.

Her jaw
dropping made a way for her to gulp in more air, at least.

She had gotten
dressed for work at the center and looked forward to having breakfast with
Paulo, hoping they could talk.  She pushed past her anxiety, relishing in
having another one of their breakfast dates, which have become the highlight of
each weekday morning.  She waited by the elevators a good ten minutes
before heading to the second floor.  She found Paulo at his office,
dressed and working at his desk.  She knocked and he looked up. 

“Yes?” he asked
with eyebrows raised.

It’s like
that? 
Phoenix cleared her throat.  “I guess I’m leaving.”

“Yeah,
okay.  Have a blessed day, Phoenix.”  He casually saluted her before
picking up the phone.

“Paulo—”

“I’ll see you
tomorrow, Phoenix,” he said through thinned lips.  “I have an appointment
and you don’t want to be late for work, do you?  Have a blessed day.”

She had no
choice but to leave when he dialed a number, placed the phone to his ear,
swiveled his office chair in the opposite direction, and gave her his back.

“Alright then,
Paulo” Phoenix snapped, as she stomped out.

Paulo waited to
hear the
ding
of the elevator before he glanced over his shoulder to
make sure Phoenix was gone.  When he saw that she was, he breathed and
turned back around to place the phone on its cradle.  “What am I, a
teenager?  I actually pretended to make a call so I wouldn’t have to face
her? Wow.  And yes I have an appointment, but not for another two
hours.”  He felt a pang because he knew Phoenix had been waiting for him
to have breakfast.  He loved those times he spent with her, just gazing
into her eyes and watching her look adoringly into his.  But on this day,
he just couldn’t talk to her, let alone eat with her. 

Of course his
stomach had been churning since he first walked up to her building and refused
to greet her.  The Holy Spirit wasn’t pleased with him, but he wasn’t
pleased with Phoenix.  Yes, he was exasperated by their conversation the
night before, but why was he being so mean?  He had no idea.  He knew
he owed God an explanation, a confession, and a plea for forgiveness, but he
didn’t want to deal with the simmering frustration that had taken place in his
heart since the night before.  It was strange that it had happened after
such a lovely time at his Bible study.  And he really didn’t know what it
was all about anyway.

He had barely
slept, for all his tossing and turning.  He had known then that he should
have prayed about his exasperation, would have talked it through with the Lord,
and could have searched the scriptures until he was edified.

But
shoulda
,
woulda
,
coulda
couldn’t change the fact that
he
was sick of having to defend his feelings for the girl simply because she
didn’t love herself.

Still his
stomach churned and burned.

“Well, you know
what?  You said we shouldn’t be unequally yoked anyway, God.  It was
You
who said that darkness has no place with light.  I think I have to let
this whole thing with Phoenix go and just release her into Your hands. 
I’m sorry, but it is what it is,” Paulo whispered defiantly.

And Paulo was
merely repeating the words that Satan had placed right into his mind.

“You don’t need
to deal with this mess.  The girl is too much to handle.  She’s got
too many issues.  Why is it your job to help her through all that? 
Didn’t you go through this before?  You need to let this go,” Satan said,
cackling as he walked a circle around Paulo.

“And God, I
don’t need to deal with this mess.  That girl is too much to handle. 
Why is it my job to help her through all that?  Didn’t I go through this
before?  I need to let this go,” Paulo repeated, full of ire.

Pray now,
my Son,
the Spirit of God spoke quietly under the loud voice controlling
Paulo’s mind. 
You are to cast down every high thought that exalts
itself against the Word of God.  Pray now.  The spirit is willing but
the flesh is weak. 

“Maybe I am
sick of praying about this, God!” Paulo countered.

Satan had not
known that God was already battling for space in Paulo’s mind.  He
counterattacked.  “You don’t have to obey Him.  What are you getting
out of all of this anyway? Why do you always have to save everybody else?”

Paulo cast off
the first thought but spoke the second, “What am I getting out of all of this
anyway, God?  Why do I always have to save everybody else?”

God did not
speak.  But He answered.  The churning in Paulo’s stomach became a
tingle that spread throughout his limbs, climbed his back, and finally reached
the top of his head.  It was the feeling of when someone’s leg fell
asleep, but it had covered his entire body.  Chills were climbing his
neck.  Paulo felt eyes on him, as though he were being watched very, very
closely.

Paulo was now
in the full presence of the Lord and there was no running away.

When the
tingling intensified, Paulo flung his hands up in surrender and fell off his
chair to his knees, lowering his chin to his chest.  The electric charge
in the room was overwhelming, almost suffocating, but strangely comforting at
the same time.  Still, the presence that was looming over every pore of
his skin, every fiber of his being, was almost too much to bear.