The No Cry Nap Solution (9 page)

Nap Tips for Newborns

Now that we’ve covered some basic information about new-

born sleep, we’ll move on to some tips for working with your

baby’s natural biology. By respecting and understanding his needs

you can respond to him in ways that bring the best sleep for your

baby, and for you, too.

Learn to Differentiate Between Sleeping

Sounds and Awaking Sounds

When you put your newborn down for a nap and later hear noises,

don’t immediately run to pick her up. First, stop and listen for a few

minutes, and then peek in on her without her seeing you. If you

are co-sleeping with your baby and he begins to make noises, don’t

move—just listen. Cue in to your baby’s sounds and movements

to determine if he is awake, making sleeping noises, or shifting

sleep cycles. Many babies have amazing radar and can tell when

Mommy or Daddy is awake or hovering at the doorway, so use a

baby monitor or stay out of sight until you know that your baby is

really awake.

If your baby is awake and hungry, you’ll want to feed her, of

course. You don’t want her to have to cry to get your attention.

But if she’s just being a noisy sleeper or moving through her sleep

cycle, let her be, and let her sleep!

Watch for Signs of Tiredness

Possibly the most effective newborn tip is to get familiar with your

baby’s sleepy signals and put him down for a nap immediately

43

44 Newborn Babies

Mother-Speak

“I learned that I should never let my baby cry, so I went to

her the minute she made a peep. I was so proud of my baby-

soothing skills because half the time she would be back to

sleep by the time I got to the rocking chair. But then I real-

ized I was taking a sleeping baby from her cradle!

Now I give her ten minutes. If she doesn’t settle down but

still isn’t outright crying, I use a broomstick to lean over and

rock the cradle, and I turn on her white noise machine. Half

the time she does go back to sleep. To think of all the extra

sleep I could have had . . .”

—Andrea, mother to three-month-old Isabella

when he seems tired. A baby who is encouraged to stay awake

when his body is craving sleep is an unhappy baby. Over time

this pattern develops into sleep deprivation. A pattern of staying

awake past sleepiness also complicates developing sleep maturity;

it can disrupt your baby’s ability to fall asleep easily, leading to a

baby who requires a long, involved routine before every nap or

nighttime sleep.

Learn to read your baby’s sleepy signs and put him to bed as

soon as that window of opportunity presents itself. Watch your

baby for any of these common newborn sleepy signs:

• A lull in movement or activity; calm, slower movements

• Quieting down, making fewer or simpler sounds

• Losing interest in people and toys

• Appearing glazed or unfocused; staring off in the distance

• Fussing or whining

• Eyes open wide and unblinking

• Rubbing eyes or ears

• Yawning

• Being awake for one to three hours

Nap Tips for Newborns
45

Gabriel, one month old

Here are a few signs that your baby might be overtired or very

hungry:

• Fretful crying

• Arching backward or going rigid

• Flailing, jerky, uncoordinated movements of arms and legs

• Drooping eyelids, slow blinking, eyelids fl uttering

• Dark circles appearing under the eyes; eyes appearing

bloodshot

• Being awake for more than three hours

Determine If Your Baby Is
Hungry
or
Tired

Babies might fuss, whine, or cry if they are
either
tired or hun-

gry. So, how can you tell the difference? First, become familiar

46 Newborn Babies

with your baby’s usual tired signs from the previous list. Note your

baby’s behavior in the minutes before he either eats or falls asleep.

Since every child is unique, you will notice your particular baby’s

ways of communicating that she is tired or hungry.

You can often tell if your baby is fussing because she’s
hungry
if

she is rooting (moving her head back and forth and opening her

mouth), thrusting her tongue, sucking on her fi ngers or hands,

increasing her level of activity, or fussing and doesn’t stop when

you pick her up. The clock can also help you make this distinc-

tion—if it has been two to four hours since your baby’s last feed-

ing (depending on your baby’s typical pattern and whether she

is breastfed or bottlefed), her fussing is likely a sign of hunger.

According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, if your new-

born is crying, that is a
late
indicator of hunger, so watching for

these early hunger signs can prevent crying.

Use the Power of Daylight

A simple way to cue your baby toward a regular day/night sleep

schedule is by taking advantage of the effect that daylight has on

sleep patterns. There is a powerful structure wired into the human

brain right from birth that interprets daylight as active and alert

time. Within the fi rst few months of life, your baby will take in

these light cues to help consolidate sleep patterns.

The most effective light for signaling alert time is natural day-

light. Make an effort to expose your baby to daylight fi rst thing in

the morning. You might provide your baby’s fi rst feeding near a

window that lets in morning light. If it is dark outside, the second

choice is artifi cial light. You can also play with your baby in bright

daylight several times throughout the early part of the day, further-

ing the announcement that daytime is awake time. By doing this

consistently, you can help your baby organize his day and night

sleeping pattern.

Nap Tips for Newborns
47

Encourage Sleepiness with Darkness Cues

The second half of the biological sleep-cue equation is that dark-

ness signals to the brain that it is time to sleep. Darkness encour-

ages the release of the body’s natural sleep hormone, melatonin.

This is a very powerful natural phenomenon that allows your baby

to be tired and fall asleep easily at bedtime.

Babies will tend toward an early bedtime, around 6:30 or 7:00

p.m., but since this is hours away from the parent’s bedtime, the

house can be lit up as bright as daytime. The bright light signals

to your baby’s brain that it is time to be alert and active. You can

protect this natural melatonin-creation process by keeping the

lights dimmed in the hour before your baby’s bedtime.

A second aspect to this process involves keeping the darkness

throughout the night. Even a small night-light can disrupt sleepi-

ness and begin the alerting process—which you don’t want hap-

pening at 2:00 in the morning! Keep night-lights small and away

from your baby’s face. Keep glowing clocks turned away from your

baby’s bed. Don’t turn on bright lights or the television during

midnight feedings. Darkness can keep your baby in a sleepy state,

allowing him—and you—to fall back to sleep easily after diaper-

ing and feeding.

Keep Night Feedings Hushed, Mellow, and

Toy-Free

As strong as the release of the melatonin hormone is, the process

can be halted with enough action going on nearby, causing your

baby to pull out of sleepiness and into alertness. A fun parent, an

interesting toy, a familiar song—any of these can jar a baby out of

his sleepy state. Once your baby has become alert, you’ll have to

guide him into the descent into tiredness all over again.

By keeping nighttime as quiet as possible, you encourage your

baby to recognize these quiet, dark times as sleeping times. You’ll

48 Newborn Babies

also keep him in a semi-sleepy state, from which it is much easier

to return to deep sleep.

Make Use of Soothing Sounds

The environment that your baby enjoyed in the womb was not a

quiet one. There was a constant symphony of sound. (Remember

those whooshing sounds from when you listened to your baby’s

heartbeat?) Because of this prenatal history, “white noise” sounds

or soft music can help babies to relax and fall asleep—and stay

asleep—more easily than a totally quiet room.

Another benefi t of soothing sounds during naps is that they

block out other noises that might wake your baby before he is

ready to naturally awaken. Sounds like dishes clinking or siblings

playing can be intrusive sounds that wake your sleeping newborn.

Having white noise or music playing can mask any of these baby-

waking noises. In addition, your baby will become accustomed to

these sounds for falling asleep, so they become an easy-to-use sleep

cue, at home or away.

The sounds that help a baby to fall asleep and stay asleep are

those that are steady and repetitive, without any major changes in

volume or pitch. For newborns, a great option is a CD recording

of sounds from the womb. These sounds are familiar to your new-

born and often are effective at helping a baby take a nice, long nap.

Other wonderful options are noise machines or CDs that play vari-

ous “white noise” options such as rainfall, a babbling brook, or ocean

waves. Choose sounds that soothe your baby and that you will be

happy to listen to as well. Once your baby is familiar with these as

his sleep cue, they can be used effectively for years to come.

Some babies prefer actual music. If you opt for music for your

baby, choose carefully. You’ll want to fi nd relaxing tunes, such as

classical or soft jazz music. There are a wide variety of recordings

available that have been created specifi cally for relaxation, yoga,

meditation, or sleep that make great options for your baby.

Nap Tips for Newborns
49

Daddy Chad; Kami, two years old; and Jason, two months old

The level and type of noise that disrupts sleep is different for

each baby. Some children can sleep through a fi re alarm siren, but

some are awakened by the slightest noise. No matter what kind

of sleeper your baby is, white noise or soft music can be helpful in

three aspects. First, the gentle, consistent sound can be very effec-

tive at soothing your baby to sleep. Second, it can fi lter out other

noises that can jar her awake. Third, it creates a consistent cue;

when your baby hears the sound, she knows it’s time to sleep.

Swaddle Your Baby for Naps

Newborns arrive from the womb, where they felt a continuous,

warm pressure on every part of their body. Now, lying in a crib

with three-quarters of their body lacking that ever-present pres-

sure, many newborns are unable to fall asleep or stay asleep for

long. In addition, their refl exive startle movements can wake

them as they are falling asleep, or between cycles of sleep. Many

babies can be comforted when parents create a womblike setting

50 Newborn Babies

Professional-Speak

“Rocking a baby to sleep in the fi rst few months of life is

often not only necessary but hugely rewarding for parents

and baby alike. For your baby, it might feel close to being

in utero—wrapped in the warmth of your arms, close to