The Protector (33 page)

She didn’t move nor did she open her eyes. I wasn’t sure what either one of us was waiting for, but frankly I didn’t care. The world could have stopped right then and there and I would have died a happy man because I was next to her and had her in my life. 

Finally she took a deep breath and opened her eyes to look at me. Her eyes had not faded in color as they were as vibrant as the moment she closed them. She gently reached up and moved my hand from her neck. She dropped her back pack and buried her face in my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and held her tight.

“What happens now?” She whispered.

My breathing had become heavy and my body was tense. But the sweet smell of her hair, and her body calmed my nerves. “I don’t know. I failed miserably I know that and I need to think of how to fix it and keep you safe.”  I kissed the top of her head and pulled her even tighter into my arms.

“You failed? I’m still here aren’t I?”

I chuckled at her question. “Yeah, but… “

“Why are you doing this? Why are you protecting me?”  She looked up into my eyes as she muttered the question.  Her anger was gone, now her eyes were full of curiosity and again of questions. I would have to try and at least answer some of them, if not all of them. I couldn’t hide things from her any longer.

I separated us for just a moment. “I am not sure to be honest.  I have protected people before, maybe not in situations like yours but, I have protected them.” I pushed her back until she was once again sitting on the bed. I kneeled in front of her and moved my hands from her shoulders to her knees.

“Stop treating me like I am a child. I am an adult who got herself into this mess. I switched out the processors. I handed it off to the wrong guy. It is not your job to protect me.”

I smiled at her confusion. She hadn’t made those choices, someone had made most of those choices for her and she followed through on those choices not knowing what the consequences were.  I had once thought that it was because of this that I wanted to protect her so badly.  But as I kneeled in front of her I knew this wasn’t the reason.

“Back in Albuquerque, when you and Tom were working together, did you have any inclination what he did for the US government?  She nodded her head no. It only affirmed my thoughts.  “Tom’s job was to hand off technology to the Israeli’s.  It was my job to protect him on those trips.  When he didn’t show up at Dulles and you came in his place, I was angry.  He knew the rules and he broke them.”

She looked at me confused. “Broke them?” 

“Yes. Like rules there are rules of engagement, there are rules between countries in swapping out technological advances.  It was always done as information sharing. But this time, that processor could spell disaster to Israel if it should fall into the wrong hands.”

Alison reached up her hand and touched my mouth with her fingers.  An electric jolt shot through me and I thought for sure I was going to pass out from the intense feeling. “And your point is? You are avoiding my question Jack? Why are you protecting me?”

I steadied myself. “If you would let me finish.”  I stood up and walked away from her toward the window.  “I think someone on the inside influenced Tom to send you in his place.  They knew you wouldn’t question who you gave the processor too. Then they killed Tom when he got antsy about it.  They just didn’t count on you switching out processors. “

“So who is trying to kill me?”  She too stood up and walked to the window. She stood next to me and stared out into the hotel parking lot and the mountains to the East of us. “Israel, the US, no one in particular, or everyone?”

“It’s not Joed’s people. Seth wouldn’t have let him in on this if it was. They have a vested interest in keeping you safe. I see that now.  Tom had some dealings with some very high ranking U.S. government contractors with Anti Israeli sympathies. We didn’t think they would do what they did. We thought they would stay out of it.”

“So is it the Palestinians who are trying to kill me?”  She continued to stare at the window analyzing my words. I knew she had figured out she was a pawn in a dangerous game. She had been chosen to do the handoff because she never would have questioned Tom. 

“No. It’s someone within our government.  Someone who didn’t want the Israeli’s to get the processor.”  Everything was beginning to make sense now.  Whoever was influencing Tom, wanted Alison to do the hand off.  She wouldn’t know any better. “These people want the processor. If you think about it and they get a hold of it they can sell it on the black market and make a lot of money. But they will kill you once they have it.”

“So then answer my question. Why are you protecting me? You could have left me in Albuquerque with Sandia or in DC and they would have protected me and handed the processor off to the Israeli’s. Why?”

“You know we’ve had this conversation before.” I reminded her. I still wasn’t ready to answer that question. My job had been to get her from Tel Aviv to Albuquerque and find the processor. Then I was to hand her over to the FBI for protection and take care of the processor. But I hadn’t done that. I wasn’t sure how far and for how long they would be able to protect her. I wasn’t sure anyone until recently had figured out who was behind Tom’s murder.  “I don’t trust anyone else but myself. It’s that simple Sonny.”

She looked up at me and smiled.  “Thank you.” She whispered looking sad.  My heart dropped.  Was she sad because she was hoping for more?  Or was she sad because I trusted no one else.

“I am sorry if I have become burden for you,” she muttered walking away and toward the bathroom.  I heard the sound of rustling as she rummaged through her backpack.

“You are NOT a burden Sonny.” I answered back. “You are so much more than anything I could have imagined.”  I did not turn around to look at her as I said this. I pushed my hands into my pockets and looked out the window. There was a breeze outside that swayed the trees back and forth. Each branch moved slowly like it had the weight of the world on them.  That is how my shoulders were feeling, heavy. But they weren’t feeling heavy with the burden of keeping her safe. Instead it was the burden that I could hurt her by falling in love with her. 

We stood there in silence.  I waited and actually hoped that Noor would become impatient and knock on the door but she didn’t.  It was amazing but she actually listened to me, which was rare.  I waited for Alison to say something but she didn’t.  I waited to hear the door to the bathroom close, but it didn’t. 

A

My heart began to beat rapidly at the sound of his words.  I was sure he could hear it from where he stood. But he didn’t move from his spot by the window, his back was still to me. I wanted him to turn around and see the look on my face. I wanted him to see the happiness he had given me, especially in everything that was around us being so dark and so bleak. 

I slowly took a step toward him and stopped. I wanted to reach out and touch him. I wanted to know how he really felt; the feelings he wanted to tell me but didn’t.  This wasn’t something I wanted him to hide from me.  I took another step, then another and finally the final step and I was directly behind him. I was pretty sure he heard me coming up behind him because he did not jump when I put my hand on his shoulder.

I gently tugged at his shoulder until he turned and faced me.   He looked down at me and smiled gently. I reached up and put my hand on his face.  The stubble from the previous day was still there. The roughness on my hand sent tingles up my arm.

“You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders?” I whispered the words softly, audibly enough for him to hear me.

He smiled. “I do.”

“Protecting me?”

“No,” he shook his head and smirked, “that’s the easy part, no weight at all there,” his voice smug in response.

“Then why all the weight?” Again a whisper. I moved my hand back and forth on his cheek.  He finally removed his hands from his pockets. His left hand wrapped around my wrist. He pulled it to his lips and gently kissed it. 

“I am desperately trying not to fall for you Sonny and I am failing miserably.”  He pulled me closer and his lips inched closer to mine.  I stood on my toes to bring myself up to meet them.  His lips were soft and I slowly parted my lips to let him explore. 

The warmth of his touch, the softness of his lips, and every part of my body ached to be close to him.   If I could have floated off the ground I would have. The moment was perfect. 

Jack gently pulled his lips away from mine and I groaned in protest. He took a deep breath and pulled me closer to him.  He wrapped his arms around my body and kissed the top of my head. “This isn’t good Sonny.” 

“I know.” I said softly. Deep inside I realized this wasn’t good. I was putting him in a position he didn’t need to be in. But everything about the moment, the kiss and arms wrapped around each other seemed so right and so perfect.

The knock on the door startled us both.  It was Noor. We had been in here long enough alone and she was probably anxious to get in here and stop whatever we were doing or talking about.

I gently pushed myself away from him and walked over to the bathroom.  I needed to get a hold of myself.  I grabbed my backpack that had been on the floor and threw it back on the bed. I turned to look at him as another knock came.  I could hear Noor on the other end.  She was not a patient person I could tell.  I smiled at Jack and walked into the bathroom and turned on the water to the bath tub.  I hadn’t planned on taking a bath. I just wanted the water so I wouldn’t have to hear their conversation. 

I took off my shoes and socks and sat on the edge of the bathtub. The water was warm and it felt good on my tired feet.  I leaned against the wall and imagined what was racing through Noor’s head.  As a woman I didn’t have to guess at the fact she didn’t like us being alone together.   I hadn’t decided whether or not I had liked the red headed woman.  She was very pretty, but also very arrogant. I admired her persistence, but I also was beginning to dread it.  

When she had suggested that we share a room and Jack and Joed share a room, panic had flowed through my veins.  I did not know this woman beyond the few minutes we had spent together in the car and me watching her from a distance. I was afraid she was going to question my feelings for Jack and our friendship.  I could admit them to myself but I wasn’t ready to admit them to anyone else.

I shut off the water and as soon as I did I could hear the talking in the next room. I knew Noor was questioning him on our conversation when we were alone and I smiled mischievously as I hoped he avoided the subject. And from the sounds of it he was.

“You need to keep Joed and I in the loop. And I don’t think it is wise for you to go to Oregon liked you planned. You’ll be putting the cop in danger and the rest of us by bringing someone else into the picture.”

I quickly took my feet out of the tub and dried them off. The smug smile I had on my face was suddenly gone as the talk increased about our next destination.

“You’ll be putting him in danger as well Jack, have you thought about that? I am sure Alison won’t be thrilled to learn you are putting her boyfriend slash fiancé in danger?” I hadn’t opened the door but I heard everything Noor had been saying. I was sure she was being loud, just so I would hear her.

I walked out of the bathroom to where Joed sat quietly on the couch.  He seemed to be the quiet one, who said little unless it truly mattered or was necessary. He was an observer and I liked him because he was not quick to judge like Noor.  He smiled sweetly and acknowledged me with a nod of his head.

Jack watched me walk into the room, but he neither smiled nor acknowledged my presence. Instead he continued his conversation with Noor. “He is not her fiancé, and he can handle himself. I had Seth check him out. Plus we don’t have to tell him anything.”  Jack had said the first part defensively, like it mattered to him.  Noor looked from him to me and back to him, as if she was going to get some kind of response from me.  I said nothing.   “She is merely going to visit him, that is the show.  I had planned on laying low and work on negotiating her safety.” Jack turned and looked at me.  “I trust no one Noor. But, if he loves her like I think he does I know he would go to great lengths to protect her if a situation arose.” His eyes were dark as he said this.

This didn’t stop Noor though. “And you know we are not dealing with petty criminals here Jack, we are dealing with men who will stop at nothing to accomplish a free Palestinian state. You know as well as I do a cop from Oregon isn’t going to stop them from getting to her.”  Noor turned to look at me. “You are being foolish.” That last line, I knew, was for my benefit.

“I don’t expect him to stop anyone. I expect him to do what comes naturally for him – love Alison.  Think of it as a two for one deal. Alison gets to spend some time with someone she knows” I noticed he stopped short of saying love, ” who knows nothing and we can negotiate a deal. I am simply looking to buy us some time Noor.” Jack had turned away from me to talk directly to Noor but he turned his attention back to me.

Noor’s face was filled with frustration. She stood there defensively with her arms crossed and she took in Jack’s idea.  “And how do you explain the presence of us Jack? Alison, do you seriously think this is wise. You are a smart young woman?  Come on?”

I shrugged my shoulders and sat back on the couch.  “Wow, Noor I am impressed you think I am a smart young woman.  I was beginning to think you thought I was some child or ward, Jack adopted.”  I did not hide the scorn or humor from my face.  Truth be told, I wasn’t thrilled at the idea of putting Eric in any harm at all, but I have to trust Jack. And I wasn’t going to give Noor the satisfaction of knowing she was correct about my concern for Eric.