The Rise of Emery James (28 page)

"Sleep well, baby," he says. I still love it when he calls me that.

"Text me when you are home?" I ask.

"Okay."

He kisses me once more and then heads out to his truck. I watch until his taillights fade into the darkness and then my fingers trace my swollen lips. I smile. The smile I couldn't find at all refuses to leave when it comes to Cole Bennett. He's bringing me back to life.

ANNIE WASN'T KIDDING;
she's been blowing up my phone with plans for girl's night out all week. No matter how many excuses I throw at her and Kelsey they counter with a reason why I need this. They are probably right, but it doesn’t settle the butterflies in my stomach. I haven’t been out in a long time. Not like this. Not since college really. Gabe only took me to stuffy work parties where I was meant to impress important people. I’m not even sure I remember how to act at a bar. How is it that I feel so old and out of touch at twenty-four?

The bar is loud. Country music is blaring from the speakers and there is a hum of chatter in the air. I'm pretty sure every single person in Darling and under the age of thirty-five is here. It makes my pulse tick up and I start to regret agreeing to come; my porch swing and my yoga pants were a much better option.

"Stop scowling," Kelsey scolds as I take in my surroundings. I force a smile and take a deep breath. She's right. Tonight I'm having fun. Tonight is about the old Emery. I need to leave the stuck up version of me behind and let loose a little.

We grab a table just off the dance floor. It's one of those round booths covered in red worn plastic. It provides a nice nook to people watch, which is good since there is a good chance that is what I'll be doing for the majority of the evening. It's all about baby steps. Just being here feels like an accomplishment. Fighting through the anxiety of the loud crowd and pulsing music is a battle. But it's one I'm determined to win.

I slide into the booth, sandwiched in between Annie and Kelsey. A young college guy comes over to take our drink order. He winks at us and kneels down at the edge of the table to engage us. I can't help but smile as he works every angle to ensure a larger tip at the end of the night. We all order a beer and Annie orders us all a shot to get the night started. She's on a mission and I'm pretty sure that part of that mission is to get me drunk.

I can't help but feel a little out of my element, but the girls are good to me. They don't push too hard. They've adapted to the new Emery and the fact that they still seem to like me is a relief. I don't have the energy to put on a show for anyone and I'm glad they don't expect me to.

College Boy brings us our shots and beer and Annie raises her shot glass for a toast. We all follow her lead and wait for her to speak. "To real friendship. The kind that can't be dimmed by distance, time or loss. To friends like us. May we be kicking ass until we're ninety." We laugh and clink glasses before tossing back the fiery liquid. The burn seeps all the way down to my toes, warming me.

"We could dance," Annie suggests as she scopes out the dance floor. I'm pretty sure I'll need another shot before I venture out to dance. It's not like dancing at The Lodge with Cole, surrounded by all of Nana's friends. This place becomes a meat market and I'm not interested in shopping.

"Maybe later," I offer casually. Kelsey snorts beside me.

"Yeah, right."

"Not believable?" I ask laughing.

"Not even a little bit," she says.

"Fine. No dancing yet. We'll just scope out the goods from here,” Annie says.

I relax in my seat a little and listen as the girls point out people and give me their story. Some of the names I recognize, but mostly it all gets lost in a blur. Partly because I'm overwhelmed and partly because College Boy keeps bringing over shots. These girls mean business.

I hesitate for just a moment before downing the shot of Fireball that Kelsey ordered up. It tastes like redhots and burns all the way down. I shake my head as it leaves goose bumps over my flesh making the girls laugh.

"Ready to dance yet?" Annie teases. I shake my head.

"No. I'm people watching. Feel free to go out and show me how it's done though," I offer.

"Oh, no. I'm waiting for you, angel," she smiles leaning in and kissing me on the cheek before erupting in a fit of giggles. It's contagious and I let myself give in.

Maybe this is what it feels like to be young.

Cole

I WALK INTO THE BAR,
my eyes automatically searching for Emery. Sure, it's probably a shit move to show up on her girls’ night out, but I don't really care. I tell myself that it's because she might need me and I like being there for her. I like rescuing her. I guess I have some sort of hero complex. I tell myself that's why I came, but deep down I know it's so I can beat down any jackass that decides to talk to her. God help any asshole who asks her to dance.

I see her immediately, she's sandwiched in between Annie and Kelsey looking warily at the line of shot glasses in front of her. It makes me smile, just watching her reason out whether to take them. She's so used to fighting against herself these days that she's forgotten what's it's like to just live for the moment. I hope she takes the shot.

As if my silent encouragement from across the room gives her the push she needs, she raises the glass and downs the clear liquid. She scrunches her eyes and shakes her head against the bitter, burning taste as Kelsey gives Annie a high five.

I watch her as I stop at the bar and get a beer, torn as to whether or not I should interrupt. She looks like she's having fun. I don't want to take that away from her, but I also can't help but want to be a part of it.

I make my way to the table casually. "Ladies," I say in greeting. I can't lie. The surprised look followed by the genuine smile that covers Emery's face has my heart doing somersaults. Shit, I'd do anything to have her look at me like that all the time.

"What are you doing here?" Emery asks. Her cheeks are pink, flushed and beautiful.

"Crashing your party of course," I tease.

"Cole, this is girls’ night. You don't get to crash," Annie scolds me as she takes a long drink from the glass in front of her.

I ignore her and keep my gaze on Emery. "What do you think, James? You mind if I crash?"

I watch as she swallows hard. The movement of her throat has me wanting to crawl over the table and kiss the hell out of her. "Free country," she says simply. She's trying to play it cool. After all, no one here is supposed to know that we are fighting a losing battle of friendship. No one here is supposed to know that I laid her out across her kitchen counter and made her come against my mouth until she lay limp and spent. She drank tequila that night. I can remember the taste of it on her tongue so vividly that I'm feeling a little tipsy just from the memory. Maybe I should buy her a shot to remind her.

"Did you hear that, Annie? Free country." I give Emery a wink. I can't help it. Maybe I like to play with fire.

"Whatever. I'm going to grab us another drink." Annie rolls her eyes and slides out of the booth allowing me to slide in in her place. I inhale the scent of Emery immediately. Grapefruit mixed with the soft smell of gardenia flowers.

"Hi," I say quietly as I move in beside her.

"Hi," she returns.

"Are you drunk?" I tease, eying the empty shot glasses.

"Only a little," she admits.

"You don't mind me crashing do you?" I ask, leaning in, my voice low in her ear.

She shakes her head no and I feel better. I glance over at Kelsey who is on her phone and has stopped paying attention to us.

"You want to dance or something?" I ask.

She looks doubtful, so I push a little. "I'll behave," I promise.

"Alright. One dance," she agrees.

"I'll take anything you want to give me," I smile, taking her hand and pulling her from the booth. She raises her eyebrow and I smile. Okay, maybe I meant more than a dance with that statement.

Kelsey looks up as we slide out of the booth and gives Emery a knowing smile. "Guess it just takes the right offer to get you on the dance floor."

"She can't resist my charms," I throw over my shoulder as I take her hand and lead her to the floor.

I lead her right to the center, so that we are surrounded by other dancers, but as I pull her close to me they all fade into background noise. Emery is smiling up at me, her arms sliding around my neck as I pull her against me.

"You look amazing," I say. "It's going to be really difficult for me not to stare at you all night."

"Maybe you should have stayed home then. So you wouldn't be so tempted," she suggests. She's teasing me and I love the easiness of her sass. I've missed this side of her.

"Couldn't do it. The idea of you out here looking like that had me going more than a little crazy," I admit.

"Crazy, huh?"

"Certifiable."

"I like it," she admits.

I tighten my hold as I smile down at her, "Me too."

Having her in my arms with the music swirling around us has my body feeling warm. I haven’t even had a shot and yet I’m already feeling dizzy from her presence alone. It’s not surprising. I’ve been drunk on Emery James for years.

Emery

MY HEART IS BEATING
like crazy, slamming against my chest in an unsteady rhythm. My pulse thrums with anticipation as Cole holds me close against him. His body is hard and warm and more intoxicating than the shots I’ve had tonight. I swallow hard as his thumb runs across the strip of skin left bare where my shirt has risen up. It sends electricity through me.

It only takes a moment before I’m completely lost in him. The rest of the world around us fades away so easily. It’s just us. Emery. Cole.

"Are you having fun tonight?" he asks, his voice low and sultry in my ear. It’s dangerous when he talks to me in that voice. It’s deep and dark and full of promise. It sends memories flashing through my brain of panted breaths and kitchen counters and the way it sounded as it drifted down my body before settling between my legs. I shiver against him.

"Yes," I say. It comes out sounding breathy, the memory too fresh to sound casual. He smiles, because he knows. He knows and he feels it, just like I do. We suck at being friends.

"I probably should have stayed home and let you have your night out with the girls. But I just kept thinking of you here looking like this and knowing that some asshole was going to ask you to dance. I decided I wanted to be that asshole. I hope you don't mind," he smirks.

"There's no other asshole I'd rather dance with," I tease, smiling up at him.

"I'm a lucky bastard," he says.

As far as I'm concerned there's no one else around and I know if I'm not careful I'll get caught up in being with him and there will be a hundred questions to face when we go back to the table. The girls already suspect that something is going on between us. Apparently I’m not the best liar. Or maybe it’s just the way I feel lighter when I talk about him. He’s changing me and I can’t help that other people are starting to notice.

But I can’t go there. Not yet. I can’t be the girl who buries her husband and falls into another man’s bed like it never happened. No one here knew Gabe and no one knows our history, but even if they did, it wouldn’t matter. He was my husband. He was my choice and our circumstances didn’t give me any liberties. Still, I’m really glad that Cole showed up tonight. The girls are great, but I feel more at ease when Cole is around. He brings out something inside me that no else does.

The song drifts around us, drowning everything else out. I let him pull me closer to him and I can’t help how my focus lingers on the way his thumb rubs soft circles across the hand that he holds in his. He holds it to his chest, watching me with those eyes that make my stomach tumble.

"So, it's been good?" he asks, confirming my earlier answer. I smile at the real concern there. He knows it’s hard for me to step out of my comfort zone. He knows it’s a struggle to find a new normal, one outside of the house, with real people and real situations.