Read The White Cowboy - Complete BWWM Romance Box Set Online
Authors: Susan Westwood
Handing the glass and tablet to her, he waited for it. He watched as she drank down most of the glass, exposing her long neck to him. He blinked. He needed it far too badly, considering he had had sex just a few hours ago.
"Thanks," she said, handing it back.
She flashed him a smile, but he could see the pain in her eyes. "Maybe you shouldn't have gone tonight."
"I'll be fine as soon as this takes effect."
He put the glass on the nightstand, then slid back under the covers on his side of the bed. He opened his book and read another sentence three times.
Sighing, he closed the book, and turned off the light. "Good night."
"Good night," she said.
He must have dozed, because he woke to Gemma struggling. "What's wrong?"
"I'm going to throw up, and I can't find my crutches."
Instead of looking for them, he scooped her up and got her to the toilet just in time for her to throw up into the bowl. He held her so she didn't fall over even though she was standing on one leg.
Finally, she said, "I need to sit."
***
Gemma got to the floor with Brandon's help. The room was spinning.
With her breath ragged, she leaned her head on the toilet edge. The coolness of the porcelain felt good on her hot forehead. Brandon had flushed several times for her. Now she just wanted to die.
"Here, rinse, don't drink."
Brandon handed her a glass of water. She did as he said.
Her stomach wretched, then she burped louder than she'd ever heard anyone burp. She put a hand over her mouth. "Excuse me."
"That might be a good sign."
"What made me sick?"
"Probably the pain meds."
"It didn't bother me the first time," she said.
"Sometimes it takes more than one exposure."
"Guess I'll stick to ibuprofen."
"Probably a good idea."
He sat on the edge of the tub, his long legs out in front of him. His hair was ruffled, and his eyes looked a little bleary.
"I'm so sorry. You were asleep."
"Better than you throwing up in bed."
She snorted. "That would have been bad."
"You might have been sleeping on the floor for that."
She laughed. "You wouldn't make me sleep on the floor."
He gazed at her as if he were looking into her soul. "No, I wouldn't have kicked you out of bed for that."
She rubbed a hand down her face. "I feel as if I threw up my insides."
"You were doing a good job," he said.
She took a few deep breaths. "I need to use some mouthwash."
He helped her to her feet, and then over to the sink. She rinsed with a minty mouthwash.
"You ready to go back to bed?"
"Yeah. I'm pretty wiped now."
He scooped her up, then brought her back to the bedroom. Placing her gently on the bed, he kissed her forehead. She liked that.
***
Brandon slid back into bed, now wide-awake. He didn't want to turn the light on, but he really could use a few more chapters from his book.
Gemma rolled over. Then she rolled over again. Her moving jostled him.
"Can't sleep?"
"I'm exhausted, but I can't get comfortable," she said.
"Are you in pain?"
"No, strangely. Guess I got enough in my system to dull the ache."
He rolled to his side and tugged her to him. "Here."
She slid her butt up against him. "Thanks."
He rested one arm on her hip and the other above her head. Soon her breathing slowed.
Guess that was what she needed. Too bad it hadn't helped him sleep. His erection pressed against her backside. And she was sleeping through it.
He had to think about baseball, or the farm report. Anything to quell his roaring hard-on.
When he thought Gemma was asleep, he would slide away from her. When he moved to do that, she grabbed his hand. "Don't go."
She shifted so she was facing him.
"Gemma?"
"I can't lay here next to you and not want to be naked with you."
He cleared his throat. She certainly told him what she wanted. "You sure?"
"I couldn't be more sure."
She put his hand down her pants. She was wet. For him. Not anyone else.
"What if I hurt you?"
"We'll figure it out. I just need slow and gentle tonight."
"Then slow and gentle it is."
***
Gemma sat up to take off her top, then shimmied out of her pajama bottoms the best she could. Brandon pulled them the rest of the way off, being careful over her foot.
"Last chance to say no."
"Yes," she said.
"Even with my ex-wife in the next room?"
"Not ideal, but let's go for it. I just will try to be quiet."
He laughed. She knew why. She'd been pretty vocal last time.
"We'll try that," he said. "Right now."
He bent down between her legs. Oh God. His tongue did a dance across her nether region, and she didn't think she could hold still very long.
The pressure built as he continued his sweet torture. He spread her lips apart, attacking her most sensitive spot even more fiercely. She squeezed the sheet in her hand, then bit down on the pillow as her orgasm rocked through her.
"I've been waiting for that all day."
His chuckles rumbled out of him as he slid his body up hers. She loved the hard lines of him. He was all man. No squishy parts. Really, nothing was squishy at the moment.
Even his balls were hard as she reached to play with them.
"Damn," he said. "I think I've been waiting for this all day, too."
"And to think. You'd be on the couch if your ex-wife wasn't here."
He nibbled at her neck. "Let's not talk about her."
"Deal."
He rained kisses down her neck, then down her chest to her nipples. He played with one while he nibbled on the other. Her back arched, and she wanted him inside of her.
"Now."
So he complied.
"Let me know if I hurt you," he said.
"I'll be fine. I won't break."
"Mm."
***
He knew he couldn't hold on much longer. No matter how much he thought of the farm report or hog futures. He’d been holding out for what seemed like a lifetime.
Gemma came again, and he knew he could let loose. As if they'd been teasing each other all day to get to this point, his release was the sweetest he'd ever had.
With only partial ability to control his limbs, he moved to not lean his weight on her.
She was so soft. Warm and pliant, and so reactive to his touch.
He could get used to Gemma in his bed.
His breath stilled. He had to remember that she was leaving. A day from now her car would be back. And then she'd leave the next morning.
She ran a hand through his hair. "Can't breathe."
He shifted off of her, not losing touch. "You weren't very loud. I mustn't have done my job."
She laughed. "I bit the pillow. I'd be mortified if your, uh, anyone heard me."
She snuggled closer to him.
"How's your foot?"
"It is throbbing a little," she said, “but I don't care.”
"You want me to get some ibuprofen?"
"Do you really want to get up?"
"No."
"Then, no. If you feel like it in a few minutes, then sure."
He wasn't sure he could walk right now, so a few minutes of recovery would be fine.
He shifted onto his back, and Gemma put her head on his shoulder. Her fingers played with his chest hair.
"What are you thinking?" she asked.
"Nothing, really."
He wasn't going to tell her that he was thinking about how lonely he would be after she left. Not that he wanted her to stay so much as he wanted her to be with him. He wouldn't have held her back from her dream.
His wife had never told him that she had a dream. She'd never shared it with him. He would have been supportive. Well, as much as he could have when he was dealing with his career being over.
He didn't miss the spotlight, but he understood how some craved it. He liked his quiet life, he just didn't want to be alone anymore.
Even if that person wasn't here all the time, he wanted to know he had a partner. That person didn't have to want the exact same things he did.
Maybe being alone all this time was not a good idea.
Gemma woke when Brandon left the bed that morning. They spend a delicious night together, and she didn’t want reality to intrude on their fantasy. Last night they were the only two people on Earth. She didn’t have an appointment in Hollywood. He didn’t have animals to feed or a broken heart that he’d walled off from others.
"Already?"
"The animals need to be fed." He kissed her forehead. "Go back to sleep."
She could and she did, but woke up when her foot began to hurt. Time for more pain medication. Then she remembered that Jessica was most likely still here. She couldn't walk naked anywhere.
When she turned her head, she discovered Brandon had left her a bottle of ibuprofen and a glass of water. That man was good.
She could get used to this, but then she shook her head. No.
She was going through with her plan to be a star. Having someone on her side, or a place she could escape to wouldn't be bad. But he would want her to stay and be a wife. Be in his bed and wake up with him every day. She couldn’t do that and fulfill her dream.
She didn't think she could do that without getting swallowed up by Brandon's life. He deserved someone here all the time. Maybe his ex was here to stay, and she would be the balm that would help him heal from Gemma leaving.
Carefully, Gemma put on her pajama bottoms and top, then snagged her crutches. She walked to the bathroom to take a shower, but took a bath instead because then she could drape her leg over the side and not have to stand.
She found Jessica in the kitchen with a coffee cup in front of her. She was staring out the window. From that vantage point, Gemma realized she was watching Brandon.
Maybe the woman still did love Brandon.
"Good morning," Gemma said. She poured herself some coffee, then picked over what Brandon had left for them to eat. That man could cook. Even when he just made bacon, it tasted as if it came from the gods.
"So what's your story?" Jessica said.
She didn't look like she'd had a good night's sleep. Had she heard them? Gemma was going to assume not. "What do you mean?"
"What brings you to Iowa?"
"I'm on my way to California."
"Ah, following that dream. That dream sucks."
Charming. "I'd rather find that out for myself."
***
Brandon whistled through his chores in the morning. He was happy and sated, even though he knew he'd have to face his ex at some point. He knew Gemma could hold her own.
While he was feeding his goats, Jessica appeared in the barn door. Guess his quiet morning was over.
She crossed her arms and leaned on the wall. "You ready to hear my story?"
He didn’t stop for her. "Not interested in your story. I'm interested in seeing the taillights of your car."
"When did you get so cold?"
He stopped, his gaze taking her in. "When did you see me as a pushover?"
She snorted. "Maybe if you'd been a pushover, I'd have stayed."
"Maybe if you'd shared your dream with me, I might have supported it," he said.
She laughed. "You were a little too focused on you at the time."
"I was recovering from a major injury. I'm sorry I wasn't as attentive to your needs as I should have been. My career was over."
"The career that you'd already been planning to leave. I don't buy the life crisis angle. You were ready to be done."
He clenched his fists. "Maybe I was, but that doesn't mean I was completely sure what my new path was."
She plopped down on a hay bale. "Still."
"Still. You could have told me. Or did you not want to admit that you enjoyed the limelight when I was in it?"
She looked down at her feet. He'd struck a nerve. "I didn't think you'd want me to pursue my dream."
Right now, he wanted to shake her. Did she not know how he had felt about her? How much he had loved and practically worshiped her? "Jessica. I loved you. If you had explained your dream to me, I would have figured out how to make it work."
"Really?"
He stood in front of her and pushed his hat back on his head. "Really. I may have needed time to adjust, but I would have. To keep you? To keep our marriage intact, yes."
She cocked her head as she looked up at him. "What about now?"
"What about it?"
***
Gemma didn't want to eavesdrop, but she wanted to know the answer. If Brandon still had feelings for his wife, then she could go to Hollywood and not look back. She could move on with her life knowing he didn't love her and that was okay. Well, she’d figure out how to be okay with it.
A hand on her shoulder startled her. Clint stood behind her.
"If you listen in, you might find out something you don't know. Come help me milk the goats."
She frowned, but followed him. She wanted to know if Brandon still loved his wife. Needed to know before she left. "Slow down," she said to Clint, who was striding ahead of her. "I want to ask you something."
He stopped and turned to her. "I probably don't know the answer."
"You might."
"Talk and walk," he said. "We have chores to get done." He looked her over. "Well, I have chores to do."
She followed him to the goat barn. The animals were raising a ruckus, and she had to smile. It was as if they knew they were going to get milked and fed. Clint pulled up a bale of straw for her and another for her foot. Then he set about milking the goats.
"Why only three goats?" she said.
"Is that the question you wanted to ask?"
"No. I was working up to that."
He glanced over the animal as if he didn't believe her. "Three because anymore and he'd probably need to automate."
"Why not automate then?"
"Because that's expensive. He needs to have a few more years of profit before he can either reinvest more money or get a loan. That’s probably more than I should have told you."
She glanced back at the door, still wanting to hear the conversation between Brandon and Jessica. The outcome shouldn't matter.
But it did. If Jessica was staying around, Gemma wanted to know.
"How long were Brandon and Jessica married?"
"Two years, I think. But they were together a year before that."
"Does he still love her?"
Clint laughed. "First off, that isn't my business, and frankly it isn't yours since you're heading out tomorrow. Why are you interested?"
She looked out the door again. "I don't know."
Clint moved to the next goat, with a pail in his hands. "If you don't mind taking advice from someone who has been around for a while, life is short. Grab what you want when you can."
"I feel as if I've already been doing that," she said.
"No, you've been dipping your toe into something you have a passing interest in."
"I'm going to Holly wood."
"Yes, you are, but are you the pig or the chicken?"
"What do you mean?"
She had a feeling she was going to get some farm wisdom. Probably as good as any wisdom anyone could hand out.
"Both the chicken and the pig contribute to breakfast. The chicken just lays an egg, while the pig gives his life."
She mulled that over. She was the pig when it came to her career. "I'm the pig."
"Are you? Are you really?"
***
Brandon stretched his arms over his head. This conversation with Jessica was tiring him. "Why does it matter now? Nothing about my life has changed. It's the same boring life you escaped from."
Jessica bit the inside of her cheek. "I know that. Maybe I've reassessed what I want in life."
"Just come out with it. Why are you back?"
She looked away for a moment, her forehead a study in wrinkles. He wouldn't point that out. At least she hadn't done the Botox thing.
"My accountant stole all of my money."
"So get it back."
She didn’t make eye contact with him; he didn’t believe her whole story. There was more to this than she was saying.
"It isn't that easy. I have no money. None. I can't afford a lawyer."
"So you give a lawyer a percentage of the money recovered."
His work in the barn done, he stood with his hands on his hips. He had more work to do, and he didn't really want to stand here rehashing old times with a woman he had never expected to see again.
"It isn't that simple."
"There's more?"
"I'm pregnant."
"Well, Jessica, when you screw up, you do it well. You're Jessica Steele. You've been on the charts. There isn't anyone who can help you?"
"Well, no one I can trust. You're the only person I've ever trusted."
He shifted his hat lower on his head. This conversation was getting nowhere. "I don't mean to laugh, but I really want to."
"Why?"
"Because I wouldn't trust you if you paid me."
She frowned. "And do you trust Gemma?"
"That's a whole other story. She's leaving tomorrow. I don't have to trust her. It's been the arrangement all along."
"You get to dip your wick, and she gets what?"
"A place to stay and warm meals while she's waiting for her car to be fixed."
"Convenient."
His turn not to look her in the eye. He wasn’t completely comfortable having anyone else examine his deal with Gemma. He didn’t want to examine it either. "Yes, it was for both of us."
"And do you support her?"
"What do you mean?"
"Her dreams?"
"Of course. She at least has told me them. I'll support anyone's dreams."
***
Gemma escaped from Clint when he finished the goats. She had to call the garage to confirm her car was going to be finished today.
She dialed while leaning against the fence post, watching Beans trot around the pasture. What freedom he had.
The mechanic picked up after a while. "Hello."
"This is Gemma Watson. I'm checking to see if my Mustang will be ready to pick up today."
"Yeah, I got the part and it'll be done by three."
He told her the final cost and she grimaced. "I'll be there at three."
She disconnected, then went to find Brandon. He and Jessica were still talking in the barn. She looked around for Clint. Not finding him, she listened at the door.
"Of course I support anyone in their dreams. Gemma will go off and be successful. I'll have warm memories of her," Brandon said.
So he was willing to let her go. Part of her heart hurt. This made her squirm and she put down her bad foot. With a squeal, she lost her balance and fell into the barn.
She looked up from the hay to see Brandon staring at her. Jessica was glaring at her.
If the Earth could have opened up and sucked her into it, she could not have been happier. Instead, Brandon helped her to her feet.
They both knew she'd been listening. Now she felt ashamed that she had. Clint had been right. She heard something she didn't want to hear. Brandon would let her go easily. As if she'd never been a part of his life or bed.
"You okay?"
"Yeah, sorry to interrupt," she said.
"We were done."
She couldn't look him in the eye, so she just left him there. Jessica caught up with her as she entered the house.
"How much did you hear?"
"Enough."
"You still leaving?"
"Yes, not that is any of your business."
"It is, if I have to pick up the pieces."
Gemma snorted as she sat on the couch. "I hardly think that will be necessary."
Brandon was willing to let her pursue her dream, which was good, but he didn't feel enough to want her to stay. When had she fallen in love with him?
"Then maybe you didn't hear the same conversation I did."
Gemma held up her hand. “This is between Brandon and me. No need for you to be involved."
"Then I'll give you some career advice."
"Really? Aren't you broke?"
Jessica flinched. "Then use me as a bad example. I gave up what I didn't think I wanted, and now I realize it was the best I could have."
Gemma shook her head. "We're different. I don't want the same things as you do."
Jessica shrugged. "Suit yourself."
***
Brandon watched Jessica and Gemma entered the house, and figured that he didn’t want to be part of that conversation. He leaned against the fence post, watching Beans.
Clint appeared beside him. "I do not envy you."
Brandon laughed. "One is leaving and hopefully the other one is, too."
His friend glanced at him. "Oh? Which is which?"