Throw Away Teen (35 page)

“
No. I already told you that I can’t.”

“
You are. Liz and Ted are fixing it.” I hoisted the pads onto my horse’s back, then the saddle. “I think they feel bad that they didn’t do more before this, but they’re sending Priscilla away to camp all summer. Hopefully, camp will dethrone the princess. You won’t have to baby-sit and you’ll be helping me have a ton of firsts. Liz’s orders.”

“
Firsts,” Rita swung her gear onto the door of the stall next to Windsong’s. “What does that mean, B.J.?”

“
I’ve never been a cheerleader or gone to camp or had a sleepover before,” I explained. “So, Sarah has to teach me how to do what Liz calls normal teen stuff. I don’t know how people do things in Stewart Falls. If I screw up, I’ll be back at the youth center and Guard needs me.”

“
So do Alfie and Fetty,” Sarah said, glancing at Rita and Kaitlyn. “That’s what we named the kittens.”

“
You ever have cats before?” Kaitlyn asked.

“
Nope, they’re another first.” I tried to figure out how to put on Windsong’s bridle and Sarah came in to help. “And Ringo and I are going out tonight after the game. When we were at karate today, he suggested dinner and a movie. That’s another—”

“
First,” Rita teased. “It’ll be a first when Dave asks me out. And if he doesn’t step up soon, I’m going to get Fiona to teach me how to rope and hogtie him like a real cowgirl.”

“
We don’t do that to smelly cows,” Kaitlyn told me, “but I bet Fiona would make an exception for arrogant football players.”

***

Ringo took me to a Mexican restaurant for dinner. Afterwards, we went across the street to the theater and studied the posters. There were all kinds of movies, even a Walt Disney cartoon one.

“
Which one do you want to see?” Ringo asked.

“
Nothing too gross. No action-adventure,” I said. “And I don’t do chick flicks either.”

“
Well, that leaves this one.” He pointed to the Walt Disney film. “Or have you seen it already?”

“
Of course not. I’ve never seen that kind of movie. They’re for little kids.”

“
And you never were one of those,” Ringo said.

“
Macho jerk.” I lifted my chin and glared at him. “If you were a foster kid, you wouldn’t have had much of a childhood either.”

He pulled me to the door. “Come on. We’ll fix this right now.”

I couldn’t believe it. He bought two tickets, loaded us up with snacks and we went to see a kid’s movie.

The night didn’t end there. We ended up in Mukilteo and watched the ferry boats cross back and forth to what he said was Whidbey Island. We strolled on the beach and he kissed me. It was gentle, sweet, and like I’d break if he wasn’t careful. No other guy ever treated me that way, as if I wasn’t as tough as I pretended. It was as if he saw me, the real me, the B.J. that I’d lost so many years ago in my first foster homes.

“
What are you thinking?” He asked softly.

When I looked up at him, I almost saw stars glitter in his cobalt blue eyes. Could I trust him with my real feelings? If he laughed at me, it would hurt more than I cared to admit. “I...I was just thinking about how different I feel when I’m with you, like it’s okay if I let my guard down a little.”

“
It’s more than okay.” He kissed me again.

In spite of walking on a moonlit beach and necking while we watched the lighted boats cruise across the dark water, I was home well before my curfew. Ringo walked me to the door. I slid my arms around his neck and kissed him. Behind me, I heard all the dogs barking. “So much for sneaking inside.”

He laughed. “Want me to pick you up for school on Monday?”

“
Yeah. That’d be cool.” And I went inside before I could kiss him again.

Sunday was all about church, chores around the house, playing with Guard and my kittens. I’d finally managed to make some decent sketches of them. That afternoon, I helped Liz cook and dreaded the moment Jocelyn and her family would arrive for dinner. I crossed my fingers and prayed she would call to tell us she was sick.

They arrived right on time. Chance was in one of her fancy velvet dresses. As soon as she saw the boxes for Jessie and Adam on the counter, she ran over to me. “Hi, B.J. Can we make pictures to send to Cousin Jessie? You said I could paint and you’d write, remember? Let’s do it now.”

“
Not in your good clothes, Chance.” Jocelyn glared at me. “Honestly. Who goes by just their initials?. What is your name?”

“
Crossing the boundaries again, sweetheart.” Zach sauntered over and kissed Liz’s cheek. “Hey, Mom. What’s for supper?”

“
All your favorites, smarty.” She laughed and hugged him. “Baked potatoes, corn on the cob, salad, and steaks if you help Ted grill them. B.J. and I made strawberry shortcake for dessert. Jocelyn, why don’t you whip the cream?”

“
That’d be good,” Zach said. “Liz, does Ted have a shirt that Chance can borrow? One he doesn’t care about? Then, she can paint with B.J.” He looked straight at Jocelyn. “I really want Chance to learn to do things for other people.”

I stared at him. He seemed different somehow, not like the guy who’d sat and stared at me the first time he was here. He took the shirt that Liz gave him and wrapped up Chance in it. “Okay, ladies. You’re all set.”

“
All right, Chance.” I took her hand and looked at her dad. “Thanks for helping.” I didn’t know what to call him, so I stopped there.

“
Zach.” He smiled at me. “Call me Zach and I’ll call you B.J. So, B.J., how many foster homes have you had?”

I eyed him. “Twelve in the last thirteen years, but that’s only the ones where I stayed more than a week. What about you?” I asked rudely.

“
Got you beat. Ten in six years,” Zach said. “Then, I was adopted.”

“
No way,” I said, still gaping at him in his ironed jeans and preppy shirt. “How could you go through that many homes in that short of time?”

“
I have issues,” Zach told me, “and I don’t suffer fools gladly.”

“
Who does? And you are really adopted?”

He nodded. “My mom always teases my dad about bringing his work home with him.”

“
What does that mean?” I asked.

“
He’s a judge,” Jocelyn snapped, “And I didn’t know about this until last weekend. Rhonda seemed to think my parents told me about them adopting a houseful of kids or that Zach had.”

He winked at me. “It would’ve been a deal-breaker, so I never did.”

“
And I didn’t say a word about Rhonda’s medical problems after Vietnam since it was her business to share, not mine,” Liz said, poking at the potatoes in the oven, “especially when Ted and I were lucky enough to have you, Jocelyn.”

“
Wow.” I nearly asked Zach why he’d settled for a twit like her, but decided that might be over the top. And he had stood up to her big-time. “Come on, Chance. If we don’t hustle, we’ll never get your pictures done before supper.”

“
Okay.” She clutched my hand even tighter as we headed for my studio. “Mommy says nobody’s ever taking me away from her and my daddy.”

For the first time I actually agreed with something Jocelyn said. It was great that she made Chance feel secure and loved. Even if she was a total bitch to everyone else.

As we climbed the stairs, Chance said, “I’m only going to have one home, but I still want a little brother or a puppy.”

I had to laugh at the way she phrased things. “Yeah, well you’re going to have to work that out with your mom. Meantime, you can play with Guard when you’re here.”

CHAPTER 24

In between spates of homework that night, I tried calling Terry at Evergreen. She was still at the youth center, but she wouldn’t come to the phone. She must blame me for telling Carol what was up with her stepdad. But had Terry honestly expected me to keep my mouth shut and let him mess with her? Would I ever have done that?

What would I have done if I’d been at the center when her mom and stepdad wanted Terry back? I stared at my history book. I could’ve run away with her and we’d have survived on the streets for a while. Without money, we’d be stuck panhandling or stealing if we didn’t resort to prostitution. Maybe, she figured having sex with him was better than doing it with strangers. It still reeked.

Carol wouldn’t give me Irene or Gabe’s new phone numbers or their email addresses, so I couldn’t ask them to check on Terry. The last time I called, Carol told me that Terry would be leaving for a special treatment facility in the morning. She’d get the help she needed there and she might be ready to have a friend when she returned to Evergreen.

Didn’t she need a friend now? And would she want me as that friend?

***

On the way to school the next morning, I told Ringo about Chance’s pictures. I’d tucked the paintings into the cartons before school so Liz could send the boxes off to Afghanistan. I’d barely recognized the shapes as Guard, Alfredo, and Fettuccini, or me, her mom, dad, Liz, and Ted, but I’d followed Chance’s directions and written the names under the appropriate blobs.

Ringo thought it was nearly as funny as I did. “So, how did you get Jocelyn to let her paint? She’s such a neat-freak.”

“
I didn’t. Zach did. He’s okay. He told me he was a foster kid too.”

“
Wow, he’s never said anything about it. I thought he was the judge’s son.”

I shrugged. Most of the foster kids I knew didn’t talk a lot about their different homes, well except to each other. If people didn’t know about me, they couldn’t use it against me. I’d bet Zach felt the same way especially with a wife like Jocelyn. But she must be a pretty good mom. Chance was such a chatterbox and she knew her parents loved her.

I leaned back in the passenger seat and thought about Zach’s dad. He’d looked familiar at the baseball game, but I couldn’t quite figure out why. Now, I wondered if I’d ever had to deal with him in court. Possibly. All the guys in their black robes looked the same to me, and I’d been dealing with them for a long time, for nine years in fact. But none of them ever offered to bring me home or adopt me. Of course, if one had, I wouldn’t have Liz or Ted. Or Guard-dog for that matter.

***

At school, people I didn’t even know came up and congratulated me for making Junior Varsity. I smiled and thanked them, not saying a word about the extra cash Ted gave me with my allowance the night before. At lunch, Willa told me that being a cheerleader would mean I was one of the elite next fall.

“
I’ll have to hang out with you so I can be popular, too,” Willa said. “Being on the Headmaster’s Honor Roll doesn’t have the same clout.”

“
Really?” I gave her a solid once-over and what I hoped was an evil smile. “Ted pays a serious bonus for Honor Roll. I’ll have to try and do it with you. And maybe, your folks would let you do karate with me.”

She looked nervous. “Punching people? I don’t know about that.”

“
Oh, come on. It’ll be fun.”

She shook her head. “What’ll be more fun is sharing some of the same classes next fall. Do you want to take courses together? Or not?”

I nearly said that I didn’t know if I’d still be here. Then, I realized I had to be. Guard depended on me. And so did Sarah, and Willa, too. Plus there was Ringo. Kissing him and making out was a definite bonus.

“
Yeah. I want to be in classes with you,” I said. “I’ve got to load up on Science next fall. It’ll be great to have someone I already know as a lab partner.”

“
Okay, but no blood,” Willa told me. “It makes me sick. Let’s take Geology. There’s some great field trips.” She scraped up the last of her yogurt. “Do you want to stay over with me on Friday? My parents are going to a dinner in Seattle. They won’t be back till late.”

“
Are you having a party?”

“
No. Just you and me. No guys. We’ll have to wait to go out on Saturday with Mike and Ringo. We can rent some movies and order in pizza if you want on Friday.”

“
Sounds great. I’ll ask Liz and call you tonight.” I crunched down the last of my apple. “I can’t believe you’re skipping the opportunity for a party with your folks out of town.”

“
My parents trust me. I’m not going to risk that for a stupid orgy.”

“
Good point,” I said.

***

That afternoon when Ringo drove me home, Jocelyn’s car was in the drive. I sighed. When I decided to cut her a break, I hadn’t thought it’d be so soon. Why did I have to deal with her two days in a row? I glanced at Ringo. “Are you coming in?”

“
Do I have to? She makes me crazy.”

“
You’re not the only one.” I leaned over and kissed him. “I’ll see you at karate.”

He caught me close for a second and brushed my lips with his. “I’ll stay. We could go to the dojo together and then Liz won’t have to drive you.”

“
Good idea.” I broke away from him, opened my door. “’We can go as soon as I walk Guard and grab my uniform.”

“
All right.” He looked at the B.M.W. again. “Can I wait for you here so Jocelyn won’t drool on me?”

I laughed. “Okay, chicken. I’ll be right back.”

I hurried for the kitchen door like usual. When I got to the porch, I heard the dogs barking from the back yard. I looked for Guard, but didn’t see my puppy, just the other four running toward the gate to greet me. Where was Guard?

I hustled in the door and stopped. Frozen in my tracks, I stared across the room.

Guard sat locked in a black cage. Trapped, he whimpered. Then, he saw me and whined. Cried with little growls.

Like I had. Once upon a time. But it never did any good. So I learned. No tears. Never.