Till We Rise (12 page)

“So…” Theo adds looking through the horizon, not literally but by the look in his face it seems that he is actually doing it. I can’t help but stare at him. All I can say: perfection in front of my eyes. End point.

“Magnificent,” he finally says.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

I am dizzy, really dizzy. I can't move my legs though I want to. In fact, they are kind of
messy
. Messy it is actually not the word, but at this moment I can’t think straight so it is the first word that comes into my mind.

I want to keep still but I can't stop moving now that everything is moving too. I feel like grabbing Theo to maintain balance, my arms are searching for him, as if we were sitting beside each other like we were minutes ago but I am not sitting anymore.

I think we are in the bar but we aren't. I am lying down on the car behind seat. I am completely annoyed by the engine’s noise. It feels that I am on an airplane right now; the noise is so loud you can’t actually sleep and the ache in your head is so strong you can barely think straight.

I try to change my position and for the first time I open my eyes, looking through the window. The only thing I see is green, lots of green and some lovely animals far away. How cute they are!

I realize Theodore is driving. DRIVING? Why is
he
driving? Oh, well, we are inside my car. Why is he driving on a route? Lots of questions I can barely understand at this moment. I just rest my head on my hand and try to concentrate on what is going on.

Suddenly, my body decides to go back to sleep but it makes me feel a lot more dizzy. I just don't know what's going on. Am I on drugs?

"Where are we?" I shout and cover my mouth immediately. I didn't want to shout that much, it was something unconscious.

"Oh my God," Theo jumps a little bit and laughs like crazy. I can't see perfectly but I believe he is placing his right hand on the nape of his neck, as always.

"What?" I ask closing my eyes from time to time.

“You scared the hell out of me,” he admits.

“Oh, sorry, dear,” I say while pressing my mouth through his cheek, giving him a little kiss.

“Nice,” Theo smiles.

“I feel sick,” I say pulling a face of disgust.

“You’re drunk, Cal.”

“I’M NOT,” I deny. He only laughs for a couple of seconds.

“What are you doing?” I mean to ask
what are you doing driving my car
but the last part of the question couldn’t come out from my mouth.

“We are running away,” he answers mysteriously.

“WHAT?” I laugh as hard as I can.

"You are crazy," he adds, "I should have listened to you," Theo admits pulling a preoccupied face. I think is not preoccupying at all. We are alive and it's nice.

"Call me crazy, call me whatever you want," I say moving my body from side to side. Bad idea.

"Are you okay, Cal?"

"I'm marvelous."

I don't feel my body anymore.

Blackness.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

I wake up in the middle of a field. The context is absolutely horrible, not only because there is a thunderstorm just above my head but because of the emotions I am dealing with right now.

I am lying on the floor full of mud; my hands, my legs, even my face is covered with it. It is starting to ache and to disgust myself. Let’s not talk about the fact that I am also covered in water and my hair is not hair anymore; it is just mud and liquid.

Theo left me in the middle of nowhere. I am alone, without anyone. I can’t seek for help though that is not what matters to me.

The only thing I see is an eagle just fifteen feet from me. The moment I try to move, it flies away.

I try to stand up but the alcohol pumping through my veins makes my legs shake a little bit more than they should. Seconds later I find the balance I need.

“Calypso,” I hear someone scream from the distance. It is definitely not Theodore but I know that voice, it is familiar.

I start running without direction, so it is senseless. I just stop because my head is turning around and I suddenly have the urge to puke. I am terrified; I think the end is near. My end.

“Calypso,” the voice is nearer this time. I freak out.

“Calypso,” again. Louder.

I ought to feel relieved that someone is looking for me and he or she will possibly save my life, but I am not. In fact, I am scared as hell. Whoever this voice belongs to, I know I should be scared of it.

“CALYPSO,” I turn around and there he is. Roth. Full of anger.

“What are you do-”

“CALYPSO,” I hear my mom. I look back and she is standing with her hands closed as fists. She looks even more crossed than Roth.

“Mom, I can explain. Please,”

“Von Steemberg,” the principal appears from nowhere and now I believe this is it; the grand finale.

Theodore left me behind, he is the reason why I left home and now he has left me. I am disappointed, not with him but at my decisions. Nobody wants me, nobody ever cares about me.

“You’re a failure.”

“You left everything for this?”

“You deserve to die,” I hear every single voice of all the people I have met in my life. Everyone is screaming and laughing at me. They are even whispering things and giggling while looking at me.

“Calypso, you don’t know how stupid you are looking.”

“You were
always
a failure.”

I start to breathe fast. I can’t keep listening to them. I just cover both my ears with my hands. Tears are streaming down my face like waterfalls. I fall on my knees and everyone is surrounding me. The noise is so loud all I can hear is nothing.

I suddenly close my eyes as hard as I can.

“PLEASE STOP,” I shout at the top of my lungs.

I wake up and sit on the bed. I realize I am sweating and breathing fast. My headache is terrible. I can’t stop crying because of the awful dream I have just had, I literally can call it a nightmare. Whatever makes me cry or breathe fast while sleeping makes me feel like I am being killed or something of the sort. It doesn’t matter what it was about, I can definitely tell it was a nightmare.

“Calypso,” I hear my name again which makes my heartbeat accelerate. I can’t stand my name. Not after what I dreamt. “Are you okay?”

I can’t talk, my breathing doesn’t let me.

Theodore sits on the bed right beside me, looking extremely worried. He places his warm hands on my cheeks, making me feel safe. I sigh deeply, which makes me cry.

“Hey. Easy. Easy,” he says caressing my face and looking right into my eyes. My breath instantly changes; now I am calm.

“Don’t leave me,” I utter kind of sobbing.

“I won’t, Cal.” He places his wet lips on my forehead. I close my eyes enjoying the moment.

We spend a few minutes in silence lying on the bed. Meanwhile he wipes my tears away and kindly strokes my arms. I feel so good right now. Theo seems patient, kind. He also looks gorgeous; he is dressing as if he was in his house; gray cozy joggings and a plain t-shirt.

“Theo,” I break the silence with a low tone of voice.

“Yes?” He asks tenderly.

“I am confused. Where are we?” I take a look at the room. It is totally new to me. The walls are kind of yellowish and the ceiling is too tall for my taste. It only has a bed and its side table. It is homely, by the way.

“We are at home,” he answers while putting my wet hair behind my right ear.

“Do you mean... Northampton?” I inquire.

“Yeah,” Theo says kind of scared of my reaction. I am definitely not angry, it was a really intelligent decision to drive here. He obviously wanted to see his family again and I actually respect that more than anything. That’s the reason why he was dressed as if he was literally at his home, because he is at home.

He kisses my shoulder, then my neck and finally he reaches my cheek, I can feel his smile on my face. He is so sweet it hurts.

“Really?” I say impressed, “It’s more than two hours straight from Boston,” I add immediately.

“Cal, you passed away in the middle of The Liberty Hotel,” he giggles. I love the way he laughs.

“Are you kidding me?” I ask giggling too. “Oh my God. I am a mess.”

“You also puked my shirt.” He is now being serious.

“Nasty. I am so sorry, Theo.”

“I’m fine,” he lets me know.

“By the way, why were we on that hotel?” I ask confused.

“We were bored and we just started walking,” he starts speaking and a few seconds later he adds, “We find this hotel attractive and we just entered there. It is free to take a look, right?” he giggles tenderly.

“What did you do afterwards?” I ask him again curiously, “I mean, after I passed out,” I add.

“Basically, some people wanted me to take you to the hospital, but I knew you were
only drunk
and I just took you to the car in my arms,” he talks fast while scratching his head and looking to the floor.

“How could you?”

“What?”

“Carry me, Theo.”

“You’re light as a feather.” He stares at me with a look of appreciation. From the first moment I saw him I have always had the urge to kiss him and I still do, obviously. But I probably smell and my breath is as bad as my grandmother’s, sorry granny.

I think it can wait a little bit.

“I’m not,” I say confused.

“You’re to me,” he grabs my hand politely. I am still not used to him. “I wanted you to get changed but you were profoundly asleep I didn’t want to wake you up.”

“Oh” I open my mouth a bit. I find it so cute not only that he didn’t want to wake me up but the fact that he didn’t change my nasty and smelly clothes either and still decided to sleep beside me.

“Do you want, uh, something from mom or mine?” Theo grills sweetly.

“Yours,” I reply quietly.

“Okay.” He stands up immediately and leaves the room. I have the chance to look at his lovely back for less than five seconds. I realize that he is not as skinny as I thought he was. Maybe because of the clothes he is wearing right now.

I realize that I have brought a bag with my clothes but I don’t care about them anymore. I‘d rather wear Theo’s clothes now. They will have his smell and they will not fit me at all, but I love when that happens, especially when my boyfriend gives it to me.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

              “Sure,” Theo says reluctantly. I overhear a conversation of Theodore and a woman, who is obviously his mom.

“Give your girlfriend something to eat, Honey,” the woman says. What a nice person! She also calls me
his
girlfriend.

                     “I will, mom.”
She is his mom.
Theo’s voice is now closer than it was before.

                     The door opens softly and I see Theodore. He closes it nicely, walks towards me and sits again on the bed.

                     “Here you go, doll” he places a big black t-shirt and a pack of Oreos right beside me.

                     “Thank you, Theo. For everything,” I say shyly, entwining my fingers and playing with them.

                     “It’s a pleasure,” he adds pulling a huge smile.

                     “Can I.. Uh.. Take a bath?”

                     “Of course you can.” He is being so politely lately. He isn’t making any joke and I find it quite relaxing because he used to make me feel nervous all the time and now is the other way round. I love his attitude and I am glad we ended up here. “But you’ve gotta eat first.”

“I don’t feel like eating, at all,” I admit, “I’m feeling utterly sick.”

“Okay but promise you’re gonna eat later,” he stares at me with a preoccupied look.

“Promise,” I say.

“First door on the left,” he adds several seconds later.

I grab the t-shirt and walk straight to the bathroom, following the directions he has just indicated, hoping no one sees me. I hear some murmurs from the first floor but I can’t understand clearly what they are talking about or how many people are there.

• • •

                     The black t-shirt is not as big as I thought it will be but it definitely covers my ass. It’s beautiful because now I have Theo’s smell on me. I just can’t stop breathing to smell its scent. A total freak, right?

                     I step into the room but he is not there anymore. I walk to the stairs and I hear him and his mom talking again. I am pretty scared to go downstairs but I have to. I cannot be scared my entire life. I just take a deep breath and start walking.

              My hair is a mess and my face too. I took a look in the mirror when I got out of the shower but I could not do anything about it. Whatever, Theo should get used to my without-make-up face.

              There are three people standing there; a woman, a man and Theodore. I know who the woman is and the other man should be his husband. They both look so homely and cute I want to embrace them both. Is that man Theo’s dad? I will find it out later.

                     “Hey, there,” his mom says when I approach them. I feel pretty embarrassed and I kind of blush myself.

                     “Hi,” I repeat timidly after her, looking at everyone in the room.

                     “How are you, sweetheart?” she asks pretty worried. She is so loving I just want to hug her and stuff.

                     “I’m better now, thank you,” I answer pulling a smile. I realize Theo is looking at my expression and he smiles too.

                     “Did you eat something?” she asks again, “Do you want any other clothes?”

                     “Mom,” Theo says.

                     “Oh, I’m totally fine. I appreciate it, though,” I add looking at her.

                     “If you need something just ask for it,” she says.

              “Make you feel at home,” the man adds after her.

                     “That’s it,” Theo repeats again, now looking a little bit furious.

                     I look at him and nod, trying to let him know that it’s actually okay and I don’t feel strange about the fact that his mom is kind of an overprotective person. I love it, to be honest.

                     “Theodore, Hun, I’m just trying to please your girlfriend. Calypso, right?” her voice is literally like a goddess, she seems absolutely caring and affectionate.

                     “Exactly. What are your names?” I ask pulling a smirk.

                     “Alice,” she sings.

“Robert,” the shy man adds. He looks like a grown up man that doesn’t talks too much but knows everything about politics and stuff. I don’t know anything about it and I love when people are interested on the topic because you have to be so intelligent to understand them, politicians, I mean.

“Now go upstairs, I’ll make you a delicious meal.”

                     “It’s not necessary, Alice,” I admit.

                     “I’m hungry, by the way,” Theo interrupts me.

                     “When aren’t you hungry?” I ask laughing while I start walking through the stairs.

                     “Hard to answer,” he hugs me from behind, placing his head above mine. Exactly the way he did at Roth’s place. I kind of remember everything.

              I realize how Alice is staring at us with a pretty proud look.

                     I link my fingers with him while we slowly start walking upstairs; we exchange looks in the meantime. This feels like the best thing ever.

                     When we reach the first floor he faces me and kindly pushes me against the wall, leaving our faces just in front of each other –less than four inches apart. I feel his breath coming right into my mouth, which makes me feel completely warm, as he always does.

                     I can’t stop looking at his lips; everything they do is crook into a nice smile.

I bite my lips, I can’t handle it.

                     In the moment I place my hands right on the nape of his neck, he instantly presses his lips into mines. Our mouths and tongues are dancing peacefully, and so does our bodies.

I am thinking about every move I am making; caressing his hair and embracing his face.

                     I don’t know how to explain how am I feeling at the moment; all I can say is that he’s the most unbelievable kisser on the entire Earth. I was wrong; this feels
like
the best thing ever.

                     He grabs my waist and pushes my shirt a little bit up but I don’t let him do anything else with it because we are in the middle of the corridor and everyone in the house can see us.

I just grab his hand and entwine his fingers with mines, while my other hand is caressing his lips with my index finger and his hand is pulling me closer to him.

The extraordinary kiss ends with smiles and pecks in between. I am thirsty for more.

                     “This is our first official kiss,” he says breathless while pulling the biggest smile I have ever seen on his face.

                     “Why official?” I say confused, smiling too, obviously.

                     “Because you literally tried to
kiss me when you were drunk,” he laughs and gives me a nice little peck.

                     “Are you kidding me?” I say laughing, looking right into his eyes.

                     “I am not. You got angry at me because you thought I didn’t want to kiss you. I
really
did but what I didn’t want was to take advantage of you, Cal.”

                     “I don’t know if you’re saying the truth or you’re lying,” I giggle.

                     “I don’t care. Now I can kiss you anytime I want to,” he kisses me and I kiss him back again.

                     “Not if I don’t let you,” I run to the room.                     “You’ll see, Calypso,” He starts running right after me.

                     We enter the room and he takes me to the bed while grabbing one of my hands.

                     “You definitely want to take advantage of me,” I laugh out loud.

                     “I’m gonna kill you, don’t you see?” He vents his fingers back and grabs me from my waist pushing me towards him.

Now I am above him. In bed. Oh my.

We start kissing again, I kind of feel like this kiss is better than every single one I ever had because it feels
real
. I’ve never had a real kiss, I mean, with someone I really shared feelings with. I am glad Theodore was my
first official kiss
.

The tenderly make out session in bed turns out to be a passionate one. I’ve never felt turned on in my entire life, but now I do. Our bodies are so close but yet so far. I really want him.

                     I take out his t-shirt, making him look amazed about it. I always wanted to do that, I mean, be the one who indirectly says
I want to
. And let me tell you that I am hoping he wants it too.

                     He makes the second step and takes out my shirt –by the way I don’t have my bra on– and throws it to the floor.

                     “Woah,” he looks down and whispers between kisses.

                     “Shhh,” I say placing my finger on his lips, I love them, they are so nice. I wish I had those lips, to be honest, they are perfect and their size is absolutely stunning.

Suddenly, he decides to change places. He grabs me, moves me literally like he said before; as a feather, and now he is on top of me. We are moving our body’s harmonically.

                     “I have condoms over the-“

                     “I’m taking the pill,” I interrupt him breathing fast.

                     “How come?” He asks between breaths.

                     “Talk about it later,” I answer.

                     “You ready?” he whispers.

                     “Ready” I state.

• • •

“Darling,” Alice knocks on the door.

I drastically wake up, realizing we’ve fallen asleep –cuddling– for at least an hour and a half. I needed this sleep. Now I realize that I was drunk enough before. Drunk enough to try to kiss him at the hotel.

“Can I come in?” she speaks again tenderly.

              Theo wakes up seconds later than me and with a sleepy tone of voice he says, “Yeah, mom,” sounding absolutely sexy.

              His mother steps in the room, pulling the biggest and prettiest smile I’ve ever seen, seriously. It’s pretty as the sunshine.

              I kind of sit on the bed because I believe it’s totally out of place the fact that I am sleeping on the same bed as her son.

              “I came minutes ago and you were so asleep I didn’t want to wake you up,” Alice says.
Oh, she had already seen us.

“You’re so cute together,” she adds walking towards the bed with a lovely white tray full of food.

              She leaves the tray at the bottom of the bed. I can see lots of fruits, tea, some bread and oatmeal. OATMEAL. I love oatmeal because it goes with everything yet I don’t eat it regularly. I wish I did, though.

              “Oh mom,” Theo says while getting out of bed, “It wasn’t necessary,” he approaches her and places a kiss on her cheek. It’s so amazingly nice that a 19-year-old boy can express his love to his mother. I am a girl and I can’t even do it myself.

              “Calypso needed something to eat,” Alice says looking directly at me, smiling nicely, “and you too, my love,” she squeezes Theo’s face.

              “That’s it, mom,” Theo says. His mother walks away, closing the door.

              We are now at the bed, looking at all the food Alice has just brought us. He suddenly gives me a nice wet peck grabbing my face with both his hands.

              I need to get used to this. Days ago I was totally crazy about this boy and now I
have
him. I am not saying he is mine, of course. But I can kiss him now; I can literally
have
him and that doesn’t stop me from being crazy about him. I was just crazy about the thought of it and now it’s not a thought anymore, it’s a fact.

              Let’s not even talk about the making love –or sex– part, because it was amazing,
it felt amazing
. First official kiss and first official
time
at the same fucking minute. I loved the way he caressed my arms and body, the way he kissed my stomach, the way he stared at every inch of me as if I was the most wonderful thing on Earth, how he said my name and how amazing it felt to have a part of him inside me; real but at the same time like a dream, the most beautiful one.

              “Calypso” Theo says grabbing my hands, “Hey. Where were you?”

              “I was thinking about you,” I speak pulling a mysterious smile. His answer is just another beautiful one. I like this day; everything is about smiles and love and I absolutely adore it. I just feel pure and happy.

              Theo grabs a bowl of oatmeal and hands it to me kindly, “Do you like this?” he asks curious.